Kaden sat down and considered for a moment whether he should find some hiding place. Then he discarded that idea because everything was an illusion. Everywhere was likely equally dangerous.
"Fine", Kaden mumbled and then concentrated to the other person. "Do you have any idea what this all is?"
"I only have an extreme feeling I should know this", Caden replied. "Everything seems familiar."
"... I have the same feeling", Kaden replied.
"I believe this to be some kind of trial", Caden said after a while. "One where we started deep within some kind of mental disruption that we have. I was incoherent and mad with fear of being weak, I suppose. I was eventually forced to face enemies and finally someone I thought I would not be able to win. I ... I simply tossed away my pride and sought to escape. It was just my desire to live as I knew I had to make an opening. Thus I attacked enemy stronger than me and suddenly I had the strength. I was suddenly able to realize knowing that, if I was weak, only meant I needed to grow and then come back once I was stronger." Caden paused to think for a moment. "While I can't actually say how long time I have been in this illusion, I have the feeling I broke out of it rather quickly."
"Assuming it started the same time for both of us, you broke out quicker than me", Kaden replied. "My ... mental situation is regarding my desire for vengeance. As you said, I think I have been very incoherent about it and essentially saw basically everyone as my enemy that needed to die. There was no focus for my rage. Whether they are my enemies or not, they are of no concern right now. I need to pick and choose. With your help, I discovered this and broke out."
"Your story seems extremely familiar to me", Caden pointed out. "Its like I feel it, if I think about it."
"As for me, your understanding makes sense to me", Kaden said. "I know I am weak so I worked around it. But I feel nothing special about it other than that I wanted to grow stronger to kill more of my enemies. Yet, you, in general, feel familiar to me. I would also use the word 'extremely' to define it."
"Since we feel such familiarity, perhaps we should extend a bit more trust between each other, yes?" Caden said. "Introductions should suffice? My name is Caden and I am a phoenix."
"... I ... somehow that doesn't come as a surprise to me", Kaden said with some confusion. "Your name... Caden. It is surprisingly close to my own, Kaden. I'm just a human from a backwater village."
Caden was quiet for a moment.
"It seems, I also know this", Caden said. "Its like I just didn't think about it, but now remember it once you brought it up."
"So... we know each other", Kaden said. "We have similar names. I seem to remember something about the phoenix clan, but how could I have ever visited the place. How could a human and a phoenix know each other. In fact, I feel like someone weak as me would be unlikely to even know what a phoenix is."
Caden could not answer it, but the more he thought about this human, this Kaden, the more he felt he knew about him. The more he pondered, the more he started to feel like large portions of his memories were false. He never grew up in the phoenix clan. He had just ... visited it? But he was certain he was not fake ... he was real and not some manifestation of this illusion thinking he was real. Just that his idea of truth was altered. He had the intense feeling Caden was not his name. Not exactly. Kaden?
It felt right. His name was not Caden, but instead Kaden, same as the human. He felt he touched on the truth even if he could not determine the reason for it.
"I think... I think we may be the same being", Caden... no, Kaden said to Kaden, the human.
Kaden the human frowned a bit. Then he realized that was indeed correct.
Memories started flood back in. They were never gone, but somehow inaccessible. Separated. Some parts had fake things added to them and those were suddenly clear and easy to discard.
Just as the memories returned, the world started to break apart. This happened to both Kadens. World seemed to spin and it quickly lost details and thing started to disapear. Suddenly there was only darkness.
In the darkness there were Kaden the human and Kaden the phoenix.
"We are in midst of producing a mana body!" Kaden the human said. "Or perhaps I should say, I am."
"Yet, these two parts of me remain separate", Kaden the phoenix added. "There is something I am missing that must be completed."
"It must be related to the differences these manifestations of ourselves have", Kaden the human said. "Similar understanding of self like the ones I already faced."
"But there is no madness to solve", Kaden the phoenix added. "Something is separating these parts of myself. Yet, since I exist here in this way, I believe the difference is actually very small. I am probably at the cusp of success. I just don't notice the final piece."
"Yet it must be significant enough that it keeps these parts of myself separate", Kaden the human continued. Then he looked for differences. It was easy to notice one. "This human version of myself is weak."
"These are mental trials", Kaden the phoenix said after thinking it for a moment. "My human self appears weak because I think so. Still, this phoenix self isn't quite as strong as the real self."
Love what you're reading? Discover and support the author on the platform they originally published on.
"We compliment each other", Kaden the human said. "We are both neccessary. As human, I would have remained weakling and likely died long ago."
"This phoenix self came to be because of Anuu", Kaden the phoenix said. "I gained high potential with it."
"As I grew stronger the evolutions left behind more and more of my humanity", Kaden the human said. "But did it? In fact, I was always different when compared to Cari. I thought a weak human should have been washed away by for greater potential of the phoenix, but that may not be the case."
"Human side made me stronger", Kaden the phoenix said. "I am stronger and have greater pontential than Cari or humans."
"Yet, I was so eagerly willing to forget the human", Kaden the human said. "I believed it to be the right path. We must be both."
"We must be both", Kaden the phoenix also said.
The darkness where the two sides of Kaden resided suddenly shuddered. Kaden felt greater mana than he had ever felt before. Yet, it remained out of his control. The two sides also still remained separate.
"This was correct", Kaden the human said. The human version of Kaden had changed slightly. He no longer felt like a weakling. He felt to be nearly at the peak of Condensation stage. "Yet, we still miss something. We are nearly there. I can feel the mana outside of this mental space."
"My mind is faster", Kaden the phoenix said. The phoenix had also grown to same level as the human side. "I can think faster. Thoughts are clearer. I believe just as before, these two sides had their own trial to solve. My human side found its problem. I had thought to leave behind my humanity completely, but I require it. It makes me stronger. If that was the human problem, what is the problem the phoenix experienced."
"I viewed the human as weak, but he had a purpose", Kaden the human continued. "My revenge. It is what drives me. The churches, the empires ... gods. They must all suffer. Since the phoenix is me, its purpose should be the same."
"The phoenix side had no purpose", Kaden hte phoenix said. "That side was full of fake memories and ideas. Indeed, the phoenix is me. Both sides are me. Their purpose is the same. As one both are equal. This is is the final understanding. There is no just human, there no just phoenix. I should not see either side separate or lesser."
Kaden the human turned to face Kaden the phoenix.
"We are one!"
Kaden said and human touched the talon of the phoenix. The two began to merge.
"We are one!"
The darkness of the mental space shuddered as it quaked. Kaden's mind and reach seemed to extend far beyond anything he ever had experienced before. He could sense structure of ... everything. His part in the fabric of existence. The sphere of his influence.
The dark mental space was gone as it quickly shattered and disintegrated like it never existed. Kaden instead found himself in the room where he began the process to form his mana body. He was still a ball of mana, but it was now fully in his control. No more leaks. He could 'see' around himself. He could see mana related to ... everything. Air, its movements, its temperature, its internal structure, molecules. That was just air. Every single thing had its own mana. Even immaterial things. Kaden could see it all, their concepts, the mana.
"No wonder True Magi are so powerful", Kaden had to say to himself in wonder. "I feel like it would be easy to just pick some of all this mana and make it do what I want. Ah... yes... that is how I will grow. Understand this fabric of existence. Then refine my own existence with that understanding. Now it is quality over quantity. The mana amount will increase with my understanding. Make more of it part of my own existence, but to do that I must understand it first."
Speaking of Kaden's own existence. He had understanding of self now. He was perfectly aware how to form mana body that was his true existence. Mana body could be called True Self. This is where True Magus and True Cari came from.
Kaden simply desired it and the ball of mana that was him started to form into his mana body, his True Self.
It took mere moments before the ball of mana had transformed into what was essentially phoenix standing upright. Kaden had been able to do that before, but the evolution he reached after the great remnant in Murika was more beastial. Standing upright, while possible, was cumbersome. Kaden had only tried it a few times with only minor success before discarding the idea. His new form was natural at it.
"Hmmm, indeed, neither side is lost", Kaden said to himself.
He could sense it. The shape he had taken was the most stable one with the most power, but Kaden could tell he could simply shift himself slightly and have a body of completely human or completely phoenix.
He quickly shifted and tested it. He became a human first. Kaden had nearly forgotten how it felt, which was exactly part of his mental trials. He had nearly let go of it completely until he was reminded that it was a necessary part of him. His face had sharp features, somehow perhaps affected by his phoenix side. His golden hair also still had the tuft at that resembled his phoenix plume.
True Magi and True Cari could alter their forms too, but those were not their true forms unless they worked hard and long to embrace them and before that they would be weakened. For Kaden, all of his sides were part of his true existence.
He shifted back to the base form.
Kaden was either both a human and a phoenix at the time or he was neither, some new kind of being made of the two sides. It didn't really matter. The end point was the same.
His humanoid phoenix shape resembled the True Cari phoenixes he had seen in the phoenix clan. His feathers were both strong and beautiful, his talons sharp, beak strong enough to tear anything apart. He could sense mana amplifying potential in his plume that was much larger and voluminous than before.
He shifted once more. This time to his phoenix form.
Most of the traits from his base form were retained, but he was back on fours. His body size was larger than previously, matching the average size of all phoenixes. No longer would he seen as a weakling due to being small.
Kaden returned final time to his base form. He still had core and he could see his mana move in patterns. These patterns were not the ones he had built so long ago. Instead they seemed to shift slightly to match the flows of mana, optimizing how it interacted with Kaden. It would likely shift to match ambient mana wherever he went.
While mana body was in many ways mana and not physical thing, it maintained its tanglible presence in the world. The core Kaden had inside him was dense mass of mana. Technically it was just mana held in place by the existence, the concept, of what a core was. When a True Cari perished for some reason, quite a bit of their mana would condense into it and it would become solid. An extremely high grade core.
Indeed, both traits of humans and Cari still remained.
"Well, as long as I don't show anyone my insides, it will remain hidden", Kaden determined. He could totally make himself transparent being of mana, but there was no point doing such a thing. No one would be able to tell just by looking at him. They would have to understand Kaden's self, which was impossible as they were not him.
*Clap*Clap*Clap*
"Congratulations on forming your mana body." It was Zeruek. "I was a bit worried for a bit there, but you made it."
Kaden turned to face him. "Indeed, yet, it is still only one step, large one, but still one step. I have work to do. I must understand my new existence first, though."