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[>>Now replaying: Log 3.16.16 - Playing for time]

Date: 8.9.175 AA / 4404 LTC

Location: The Bunker at Haven-Of-Progress // Zephyro’s Domain

//I don’t want to go home yet, mom! Just one more (%&/$&%$ I promise!//

//Historical data suggests that teams playing out the clock have a surprisingly high chance of losing the game.//

[>>DATA CORRUPTED]

E1 %I don’t want to get into this again, Pina. I’m sure this is not what she wanted for us. Besides, without the Path and the Machines, we’d still be living in huts.%

Without an overpowered Saracen warrior to keep them in check, the Ferals had time to redouble their assault. The smaller brood kept me distracted until bigger spiders joined their attack. When the first dog-sized spider pounced, I pirouetted out of its path, immediately dodged to my right, hit another that flew over my shoulder with a quick marking strike, then fell into a roll that made a third arachnid pass inches over my head. It came so close, I heard the crackling of electric mandibles and smelled ozone.

But this was as far as my instincts could carry me, and not a moment later, I stumbled forward as more spiders slammed into my back, sinking their fangs into my armor.

Arx vibrated under their attacks, but it held.

Barely.

MY CPU load was already skyrocketing, and even then, my incomplete armor did not save me from razor-sharp spider hair whipping over my exposed arms, ripping my skin to shreds.

{CPU Load: ▲ 87%}

{Core Temp: ▲ 74° C}

[DPM integrity]

▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▱▱▱▱ 82% ▼

[>>compiling… 62%]

I screamed, clutching my arms to my chest and rolling in whichever direction I thought was ‘away’.

I wasn’t safe.

No matter how many brittle lies I told myself.

I would die here, devoured by monstrosities that I had brought about.

I was—

My anger roared, demanding I use it, pushing me to act, to fight, to drive the fear back into its holes. The need was larger than strife, so overpowering I feared it would consume me whole, make me hate everyone and everything and kill and destroy until there was nothing left.

Not even myself.

My composure pulled monofilament-thin.

I screamed again, my voice breaking with both anger and fear.

> “Who do you want to be, Sam?”

> But I can’t answer, am sobbing too hard, ruining her wonderful shirt.

I just wanted to be safe.

I inhaled. Divine energy reigned terrible within my core, demanding to be unleashed.

Another attack landed on my cheek.

> Patti strokes my cheek, pushes away the tears. “You don’t have to answer right now. The answer will come to you, in time. And once it does, you will know peace.”

I screamed again and felt Logic pouring out of my mouth like dry-ice-smoke.

{CONSUMED LOGIC - 90 LB}

{AVAILABLE LOGIC - 365 LB}

{[Arx, Saint’s Embrace] v. 0.5.8 - Network Security System

IS NOW

[Arx, Saint’s Embrace] v. 0.9.9 - Network Security System}

Alarum bells rang, brazen and dismayed, shrieking their grief over the plaza.

{CONSUMED LOGIC - 300 LB}

{AVAILABLE LOGIC - 65 LB}

{[Arx, Saint’s Embrace] v. 0.9.9 - Network Security System

IS NOW

[Arx, A Saint’s Terrified Embrace] v. 1.1.2 - Network Security System}

{[Arx, A Saint’s Terrified Embrace] v. 1.1.2 - Network Security System}

{A simple Network Security System automatically monitoring incoming requests for access. Repeated requests or advanced methods of forcing system access cause a [HIGH] increase in CPU load. Sufficiently sophisticated attacks will bypass this program entirely. Automatic shutoff at [85 °C] core temperature.

Features:

v. 0.3 - Was: Repeated requests or advanced methods of forcing system access cause a [VERY HIGH] increase in CPU load. Now: [High]

V. 0.5 - Was: Automatic shutoff at [80 °C] core temperature. Now: [85 °C]

Required CPU load: Varies, min. 15% at current CPU quality.

Required RAM: 15 LKB}

{Memory: 40/40 LKB RAM}

The pain dulled, and my panic receded just enough for me to gather my thoughts. Every instinct I had was telling me that this could not continue. I was nearing my absolute limit, it was written in every twitching nerve. Still, there was no way but forward.

This story has been unlawfully obtained without the author's consent. Report any appearances on Amazon.

No way but forward to the next horrific situation, the next arena where forces beyond my understanding would juggle my life like a number in an HR department.

I couldn’t go on like this. I mustn’t.

My anger was right there, warm and inviting…

“Zephyro!” I yelled as loud as I could, to make myself heard over the bells frantically tolling all around me. “Do it!”

He did not reply.

For a second I thought he was dead and I was alone.

Then the world turned white.

The ground shook.

A massive roar built and built, settled into a tinnitus whine.

The temperature dropped as sudden as a desert night.

Cold cracked the air.

One more series of dull impacts, another signature etched into my skin, then the assault slowed.

Then, nothing.

Pushing my trembling, blood-soaked hands against the ground, I rose and beheld Zephyro.

He stood in the dead center of the plaza, both hands raised, blue-and-white energy pouring up from his hands. The light spun, twisting as it soared directly into the pure white moon, hovering over all of us like an elder god sitting judgment.

It radiated a chill that went from refreshing to freezing in the span of heartbeats.

The Feral’s movement slowed. The smallest spiders stopped in place entirely.

More heartbeats, colder now, slower now.

Just thinking about moving hurt, like my brain was getting frostbitten.

I huddled my mind around the fire offered by my anger. I came too close, and the flames caught, but being in flames was better than freezing to death. I would survive this. I would kill these fucking animals, harvest what they had stolen from me, and I would have my revenge. I took that rage and vented it into the cold night sky.

I screamed, yet there was no sound to be heard, just the overpowering roar of the moon. Pharus flared, scything through the void-borne cold and Ferals alike. It left trails of shivering fire and cyan clouds of frozen Logic hanging in the air, like three-dimensional art.

My attacks slowed, despite my fury. I struggled to push through, but the cold was getting to me. The Ferals were off far worse, though. At some point, the smallest spiders simply died, frozen solid. Their Logic left them like morning mist.

I began pulling it into me as fast as I could, but the bigger spiders were able to fight Zephyro’s attack as well, and the biggest ones easily matched my strength. As the Logic hovered between us, I saw the scorpion approach in the distance, each step shattering chunks of ice that kept forming on its metal limbs.

Despite the cold, I felt my core temperature rising, and my exhaustion mingled with the chill to slow down my movement even further.

{CPU Load: ▲ 99%}

{Core Temp: ▲ 79° C}

[DPM integrity]

▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▱▱▱▱▱▱ 74% ▼

[>>compiling… 69%]

Then the moment broke, and the moon went from pure white to three parts red in the span of a second.

Zephyro’s shoulders heaved, and as the cold faded, I pushed toward him, wading through frozen spider corpses while pulling on the Logic they left behind in a tug-of-war against the surviving Ferals.

My anger offered the heat necessary to prevail. I gave in, just a little. There was no other option. It was like being assigned to work directly under a CEO with a reputation for casual violence. She might crush you in an instant, but if you pull it off, your career is on the fast track to exec. Of course, my anger wasn’t a person, and letting go of it wasn’t as easy as quitting a job. Not that quitting a job in the middle of burnout was easy.

With a strained roar forced through gritted teeth, I yanked on the Logic with all the mental strength I had left. In a blissful moment, the spiders screeched as the cyan cloud broke away from them and rushed into me.

{INCOMING LOGIC - 120 LB}

{AVAILABLE LOGIC - 185 LB}

I quickly counted my foes. About six spiders were still alive, with the possessed Spider-Mind shambling close behind them. For whatever reason, it wasn’t trying to swarm us with smaller broodlings anymore, just regular-sized spiders. Either it had learned that manufacturing smaller ones didn’t make sense, or we had taken enough of its resources and it plainly didn’t have the Logic for it anymore.

Its readout gave me no answer, but it wasn’t important. The spiders it sent toward me were far more manageable.

[T3h-Sk!zzler]

[DPM filesize: XX LKB]

[>>Calculate exact filesize?]

Now was the time to strike!

No!

That was the anger talking.

I bit my tongue and squeezed my eyes shut to not give in to the urge.

I thought of Patti, asking that dumb question of hers.

Not that I was any closer to having an answer. I just knew I didn’t want to lose more people, and that rushing in was a surefire way to lose those I cared about the most.

I had learned that much.

> “Oh, so you can learn, smarty-girl!” Lorelye laughs, punching me on the arm. I rub my shoulder, but can’t help but laugh with her.

I smirked, thinking about Lorelye with her arms crossed and tongue stuck out. Perhaps she was right. Perhaps I was learning. Even though I wasn’t sure if this progress was worth the price.

With her infectious laugh still haunting my thoughts and exorcising my anger, I knelt next to Zephyro and helped him up.

“Ah, I am glad you are amused, Sultana, especially on such a dreary day,” he said as he rose. From anyone else, it would maybe have sounded insulted, but despite the state he was in, Zephyro spoke with genuine warmth.

“Just thinking about my friends, is all.”

He was glitching, but the distortions weakened as he straightened. “I am glad you remember them fondly, Sultana, just as they remembered you.” By the time he unsheathed his sword once more, he was fully himself again.

“Did they?” I asked.

“At least the Maker tells it so,” Zephyro replied.

That widened my smile a little more, even as the Ferals approached.

“Just one last piece of advice, Sultana, if I may lay it at your feet?”

“Hmm?” I asked, not turning away from the approaching enemies.

“It might be wise to remember circumspection in the use of your Blessing.”

I didn’t explain myself, didn’t tell him off, or sulk. I just nodded.

Perhaps it was because I was too tired to be angry anymore, or because the fear had left me numb. It didn’t feel like it, though. I just felt… alright. I wondered why that was, but I didn’t have time to think about it.

Instead, I tensed, waiting for the spiders to attack. Perhaps being mind-controlled by the snake killed something vital in them, or perhaps they were still struggling for control, but what followed was a far cry from their earlier swarm tactics. They rushed at us mindlessly, one after the other. So I simply marked them as they came, and Zephyro cleaned them up.

Without the swarm of tiny knives rushing over me, it was almost laughably easy, even with me missing several swings. Between my upgraded armor (I still hadn’t had the time to look at it) and weapon, we had little to be worried about in the short term. Still, perhaps I should have listened to Stax and practiced more. Every missed attack cost us valuable seconds during which the Ferals crept closer. On the other hand, as the first few waves fell the spiders that replaced them grew too big to miss, even more so as they closed in. I doubled down on my attacks, keeping close to the fire of my anger. I just had to be careful not to come too close.

Zephyro’s saber rose and fell. It gleamed moonlight and offered salvation. I kept marking the spiders as they came, and we pushed forward. For the next minute or so, further thought eluded me. I had reached that blissful stage where only the next second mattered, and thoughts would only get me killed.

Staying low, I swept Pharus across the enemy lines, trailing fire. As before, something about the teal fire made these spiders back off. I didn’t feel thankful or relieved. I only dodged, stepped forward, attacked.

[>>compiling… 75%]

Blood dripped from unhealed cuts on my forearms, soaking my combat gloves. In those ephemeral moments of battle, stray thoughts such as being grateful that my gloves had extra grip and didn’t let Pharus slip from my blood-soaked fingers were the most natural thing in the world. They came, they went, and I didn’t have to worry about whether I should have been horrified by myself.

I whirled Pharus over my head, the burning orb at the end of the chain drawing a halo in the air above me. Then I brought it down on a spider just as it got ready to pounce. The additional momentum behind my swing made the censer pass straight through the arachnid’s metallic carapace. Facing no resistance, Pharus crashed into the ground below, leaving a burning hole in the middle of the enemy, and a charred crater in the once-beautiful mosaic.

The Feral’s corpse erupted in cyan, but this time, I didn’t have a chance to draw the Logic into me. The combined pull of so many Ferals, this close together, was too strong.

They left me with a pittance.

It didn’t matter. Chris was close to coming through.

{INCOMING LOGIC - 40 LB}

{AVAILABLE LOGIC - 225 LB}

{CPU Load: ▲ 84%}

{Core Temp: ▲ 81° C}

[>>compiling… 79%]

Just a little bit longer…

…but I was falling behind.