The 'walk of shame' back to San Timo was spent in a tense atmosphere. Each of them was thinking about their own interpretation of the bridge collapse. The least crazy of them all was Alexis' who simply thought that they hadn't check in a long while, overlooking the possible wear and tear of the structure. At least, according to Joan, only debris could be seen below so it was probably safe to assume no one got hurt or killed by the collapse.

In any case, they wouldn't stay in San Timo for very long and would sleep on the road, as soon as they arrived Alexis would rush to the town hall to report the incident while the two scholars stayed behind with the horses. In and all that little loop would make them loose a whopping four days, and on top of that, the road through the bridge was a phenomenal shortcut. If they had been able to cross it then would have been in Andorra four days later but by the Northern road, even without taking into account the time lost, it would take them more than twice as long.

Alessia began to study the map, brows furrowed, it would take them a week just to get to Eagle river, pray that this bridge was in one piece, and then it would be another week just to get back on the main road. But going back on main road wouldn't be the end of their trial because it would still mean that they were about four days away from the site. Making them arrive at the end of June, coincidentally the hottest month of the region, which was sure to make the trip even more miserable.

"But that is just assuming that everything will be completely fine from now on! While at Eagle point we could have an episode of snow, there could be rain during the week to get there, making it flood, that would also put us behind schedule! By the time we arrived they would have packed and left!" She loudly complained as they were waiting for Alexis to come back. She shook he head in despair.

"Remember what I said? Focus on what you can control. You may find it terrible today but in a few years it will be hilarious. Isn't that what they always say?" She smiled at Joan pitifully before replying.

"I'm sure of that but the problem was that I was so excited to arrive and now I have to sit on my hands and shut up, what use is there for me? I have even completed all the work that I brought!"

"Well for starters you could put to good use your knowledge of maps to monitor our progress along the way. There is little chance to find clear road signs until Eagle point, you can keep us updated on the distance we put behind us during the day." Joan smiled in a way that made Alessia though he had an other idea. "It could keep us motivated and if your predictions are good enough I'll praise you to your teachers, I could even write a letter to recommend you to any other school you might want to enter!" Alessia's eyes immediately filled with stars.

"Even outside of the..."She was cut by Joan.

"Even outside the country."

"You can count on me! I won't let you down!"

"What are you two talking about?" asked Alexis, when he had left the two of them had been sulking in dark thought and now they were smiling.

"Alexis would you accept to let Alessia navigate us from now on? She would simply calculate our progress every day and make predictions every morning. Not actually drive." Alexis' brows raised and he smiled

"That would be great actually, it means I get help, and I can't say no to that!"

"So what are the news?" The historian asked earnestly.

"Well, they don't know what happened , they checked it a week ago and the structure was in great shape, they also said that the bridge over Eagle river should be fine but since what happened on main road they can't be too sure. Should we also find that one collapsed they say they would compensate us."

"At least there's that...Why didn't we take a boat again?" Joan had a mean look on his face. "Anyway...Shall we go?" Alessia was restless.

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"Yes we shall." Alexis gave encouragements and pets to the horses before stepping up to the seat. Alessia followed him. She was now used to doing that and even in her dress, she could get up there without help. She took pride in that.

Joan sighed before entering the carriage, he hadn't considered that kind of problems, a terrible oversight on his part, not that he was materially unprepared, he had more than enough still , but mentally he had allowed himself to be hopeful. A mistake. He fell asleep without realizing it. Lately he had been sleeping a lot and that had nothing to do with his half day, half night life, he was already doing that before, albeit a little more extreme. It was as if, for the first time in his life, it felt okay to stop working for a while. Every day he would end up in a situation where he had nothing requiring his immediate attention so naturally his body would "turn off", almost as if it was letting it's inner mechanisms cool down and he would fall asleep, soundly and deeply.

He was feeling much better, not that the dark circles under his eyes had receded but rather in his everyday life. With sleeping well come some boons; Such as better balance and reflexes, he would less often fail to catch an object or mistepping when he came out of the vehicle. He also had more patience for Alessia's antics. Maybe he had been too focused on his studies in the last years, maybe it had become an obsession. He didn't have to do it anymore, staying up late, readying every materials he could find on a very niche subject...Sure, when he was still a student trying to graduate with the honours, it had been necessary, to differentiate himself from the other, to ensure his futur, but now he was just a few steps away from the top. Did he really need to work as hard? A few steps ahead and he would be named head of the history department of the University, a few more and he would be called to travel to other continents. He was already well known across all of the five countries of Eridame. He yearned to travel beyond the ocean to study the history of Peredim and Lovone, the two other continents. But it was impossible, he couldn't even navigate on the Mother, the interior sea, so how could he pretend to be capable of traveling the Ocean?

If only he could forget, he cannot grow beyond that incident, he cannot let go of the memories, even so many years later. If he want peace he needs to forget. But to forget...It's so hard to forget when your memory is so efficient. The details have been blurred by time but the worst remains. Her face, the waves, their scream. Often coming back to to torture him under the guise of being harmless dreams. But there is no such things as harmless dreams. You may not get physically hurt in a dream but your heart will bleed all the same. Dreams lure you in with pretty colors and soft stories only to chain you and throw you down into the abyss of you fears. A blind abyss. And then... What has been lost cannot be found again. What has been sacrificed cannot be saved. What has been loved cannot be forgiven.

"You speak in your sleep professor." Alessia said innocently, it was the morning of the day after they left San Timo for the second time. Both of them were sitting in the carriage, outside, a soft rain had silenced the birds.

"Oh..? I, I didn't know" Joan couldn't remember what he had dreamt about. Frankly he thought that he hadn't dreamed since the nap he took after they had left San Timo. The dream about the incident. Curious he asked Alessia, he knew that if she had heard him, she would have listened. "Di you hear anything that you understood?"

"Understood? No, not really. It sounded like a poem, about death, or something of the same quality. Beside, I could only hear a whisper" She was seriously trying to recall what the words had been but, it had been so low that she had only caught a handful and they had sent shivers down her spine. "In only remember that you spoke of an abyss and something about a price...It seriously scared me because at first I couldn't tell where it was coming from."

"Ah...I apologise Miss Alessia, i hope I didn't disturb you too much."

"It's fine, and as I said, I could barely hear you." She smiled at him and looked outside, the sky was a solid gray. "I hope it won't rain for too long."

*****

"I can't see anything Joan!, we need to stop the carriage and wait for the storm to pass us! Or at least calm down!" Alessia shouted from the driver's seat. She needed to shout to be able to be heard over the rain. At this moment, somewhere toward the East, Lightning struck the ground, it sent her heart in a rush and made her ears buzz. The rain had begun in the morning and had soon evolved into a full blown rain storm. The visibility had drastically decreased to the point of being almost null and Alessia had trouble driving.

"Stop here and come back in!" Joan had to admit that they had to stop. He also realised that even if they hadn't they would have soon been unable to continue, the wheels would have been bogged down. Alessia came back absolutely drenched. "We will have to hope that the horse will be alright!"

"Yes. Can you pass me something dry ? I feel like my flesh is going to come of my bones!" Joan gave her a towel and tried to find something akin to warm clothes in the mess of luggage inside the carriage. He found food but obviously no sweater, he gave her one of his vest and a shirt to change into. She thanked him. Outside the storm raged on.