We talked it over some more and decided that I should say “Yes”. We weren’t sure what the Store was, or what ownership implied or if I should hang on to the key for something better, like behind door number two, but eventually the reality of what was facing us overshadowed everything. We had no idea what was going to happen in five minutes, so ownership sounded like it might be a good thing, plus hanging on to the token for something better seemed like a stupid move. Hell, I could die at any time and it didn’t seem inheritable, well lootable. Hard to loot something you can’t touch. We stepped forward again and the same blue screen message appeared.

I focused on the blue screen again and thought “Yes!” and the token vanished and the window changed.

Congrat...Well hello again!

Aren’t you just a little lucky overachiever!

We’re gonna call you Risk Taker!

+5 luck, + 1 Perception, Charisma and Luck per level.

The reason that we’re calling you lucky is sometimes things don’t work out so well. For instance, in most cases, saying you want ownership of the store kind of makes you responsible for the store. In other words, like becoming part of it, like you don’t get to walk away from the store. Instead, you get to spend, oh say, the next eternity managing it. And some of them are in some pretty God (excuse me, Us) awful places! And sometimes, the body is optional.

You, however, by dint of being the first one to take ownership on your little ball of earth, get a gypsy store. Lucky you! In other words, where you go, the store follows, maybe a day or two behind, but it will always show up where you are or were. You may not want to advertise this, because “ALL SALES ARE FINAL!” Of course, you can always cause the store to appear. But just remember, “ALL SALES ARE FINAL!”

Just then, Janet said, “What’s going on? Huh? Did you take ownership? What’s that mean? Did the token disappear? What happened?”

Tanya was right there with her, echoing her questions. “Tell us boy wonder! What gives?”

I stepped back, the girls with me, and the blue screen vanished again. “Well, there’s some good news and some maybe good news or maybe bad news? I’m not sure? The good news is that I got another title.”

Both girls looked at each other and then Tanya said, “Of course you did. You’re the boy wonder. What is it and what does it do?”

“It’s called Risk Taker. It adds +5 luck, + 1 Perception, Charisma and Luck per level. Evidently, you don’t want to normally take ownership of System generated things because, well, they can take ownership of you back. But fortunately, since I was the first to take ownership, I got a ‘gypsy store’ instead of a real store. Evidently, I was pretty lucky. The system said normally I’d become part of the store, body optional. Really would have slowed down our trip to my mother’s place, I’m guessing.”

“Huh,” they both said.

“I guess so,” said Janet. “Well, what is the bad news, then?”

“I got a ‘gypsy’ store. It means that wherever I go, this thing is going to follow me,” I said.

“That doesn’t sound so bad,” said Tanya.

“Well, the message stressed, ‘ALL SALES ARE FINAL’, so I’m thinking if someone got ripped off or bought something that they later absolutely hated, the person they’re gonna blame is me, and, I can’t issue a refund!”

“Oh, yeah!” they both said.

“That could suck if this thing is at all powerful. I mean what currency does it take? Is it like a genie’s magic lamp only with some oily guy, sorry Monsoon, trying to steal our knickers?” asked Janet.

“I have no idea,” I said. “But my luck was seven before I got this, so that may tell us something. If ten’s average, I’m pretty sure I might have failed my Luck roll. Well, what say we look at this bad boy and try to figure out what it does?”

We turned away from each other and looked back at the gas pump, well dungeon store. It sat there softly glowing in the light that it shed, looking innocuous, harmless. Somehow, I felt all three of us didn’t believe it.

“Ok,” I said. “Let’s do this.”

We stepped forward again and a new blue screen message appeared in front of me.

On a whim, I said, “Share screen” and the two girls both exclaimed.

“How’d you do that?” Tanya said. I replied, “I Just said ‘Share screen’ and focused on the idea of you two being able to view the same message as me. I’m assuming your screen changed?” They both nodded.

The blue screen said:

Welcome to the Store! Congratulations Boy Wonder and Gal Pals!

As you are the first owner of the store, would you like a tutorial? Y/N

I looked at my Gal Pals (yuck, yuck, they are so going to hate that) and they nodded. So I selected Yes.

Instantly, it felt like my brain expanded. It was like information was downloaded into my head, except there was no time difference, one minute the knowledge wasn’t there, the next it was. I suddenly knew.

It turned out that as an owner at least of a gypsy store, I could either cause the store to appear or not. Of course, if I hadn’t caused it to appear it either remained at its last location or randomly chose a location with sapients in it to appear (somewhere either around me or around where I’d been).

I also realized that the store could buy or sell stuff and the prices were high, but so were the potential benefits, things like race change, sex change, more magic, magic at all, class change, sobriety change, armor, weapons, pretty much anything at all. Holy crap, I thought. This thing is like a direct hotline to God, except the Gods on the other end have a bad sense of humor. I suspect it’s like the story of malicious genies.

Janet said, “How much for a class change to Druid?”

The blue screen said,

“You are currently not able to access that level of change. You are currently at Bronze rank, you would need to be at least Iron rank to request that.”

“I asked ‘How Much?’” she said.

The blue screen said,

“You are currently not able to access that level of change. You are currently at Copper rank, you would need to be at least Iron rank to request that.”

“What are the rank/levels required to access the various ranks?” she said.

That answer costs either 50 mana, 50 Qi or 5 Agnis.

“Hang on,” I said. “Don’t do anything yet. Is it a permanent loss or just like doing a spell, where you recover over time?”

Spell

“That’s like thirteen minutes of recovery time and almost a third of my mana, that’s pretty expensive isn’t it? Wait, I’m the owner here. I should get that information for free, shouldn’t I?”

* Bronze - G - Level 1 -5

* Copper - F - Level 6-10

* Iron - E - Level 11-20

* Silver - D - Level 21 - 40

* Electrum - C - Level 41 - 60

* Gold - B - Level 61- 100

* Platinum - A - Level 101-200

* Mithril - S - Level 201-400

* Orichalcum - SS - Level 401 - 800

* Adamantine - SSS - 801 - 1600

* Unobtanium - Unknown/Diety - 1600 +

Stolen from its rightful place, this narrative is not meant to be on Amazon; report any sightings.

“Wow! It’s good to be you!” said Janet. “It’s not the most talkative sort, is it? Sometimes it’s really chatty and then others it’s like a robot.”

"Yes,” I said. “One of the earliest conversations I had with the System, it said something like ‘ even the subroutine of the subroutine of the subroutine all the way down to you that’s running this conversation could give a crap!’ so I’m assuming that it or they or him or her or whatever has a bunch of processes that handle stuff for it. I’m actually amazed that I seem to have captured a personality sometimes. That can’t be all that common, can it?”

+1 Intelligence … and that’s the last one you can expect!

“I guess not,” I said. “The system just rewarded me! +1 intelligence.”

“Way to go, Wonder Boy!” said Tanya.

“Gal Pal,” I responded. She and Janet both looked a little disturbed and then Tanya said, “Ok, we’ll retire Wonder Boy or Boy Wonder if you do the same with Gal Pal. Deal?”

“Deal,” I responded.

“Ok,” I said. We’ve got the God box in front of us, is there anything that you’d like to ask for?”

“How much for a Potion of Healing?” asked Janet.

Lesser Potion of Healing - Heals 30 points over 10 seconds. Costs either 30 slow mana, 30 slow Qi, 5 Agnis or one SolDun.

“What’s slow Qi or Mana?” Janet asked.

It takes 2.5 times as long to replace.

“And an Agni is what?” Janet asked.

"It’s part of our new units of currency,” I said. “Last night on watch I started to try to figure out some basic info. They told me earlier that they now controlled the currency, so I thought I’d find out more. Apparently, it goes something like this:

* 10 lead slugs or Plumbs equals one Iron bit.

* 10 iron bits or Feros now equals one Copper Piece

* 100 Copper Pieces or Cupros now equals one Silver Piece

* 100 Silver Pieces or Agnis now equals one Gold Piece

* 50 Electrum Pieces or Luxes now equals one Gold Piece

* 100 Gold Pieces or Aurics now equals one Platinum Piece

* 100 Platinum Pieces or Platas now equals one Mithral Piece

* 1000 Mithril Pieces or Mitties now equals one Orichalcum Piece

* 1000 Orichalcum Piece or Orics now equals one Unobtanium or Unob Piece

“Wow,” said Janet. “That’s really complicated, isn’t it?”

“You’d think so, but I think They took care of that for us. How many Aurics is a Mittie worth?

“10,000” she replied instantly.

“See,” I said. “You just heard it once and yet you know it like you grew up with it. Like you’ve always known it. Pretty wild, huh?”

“Definitely freaky!” she said. “I can’t believe that they can just change us like that!”

“Welcome to the post-Event world. If They can add another two moons, I’m thinking that adding a little knowledge ain’t that big a deal.”

“How much should a dozen eggs cost?” This time I asked Tanya.

“Two Cupro,” she answered and then paused. “Wow, I’m not even sure I could have told you that before the Event, yet now I have a basic idea of what things should cost. This is really wild!”

“So, that potion would cost more than it should? Is that right? I seem to think that that potion should be about four Agnis. So there’s a markup?” Tanya said.

“I guess so,” I answered. “I also think that the potion is a little much. Maybe they don’t want low-end business or maybe they want us to pay in something other than money. For instance, what’s a SolDun?” I asked the God Box.

It is Our least currency. It is immaterial and cannot be exchanged among lesser beings. It can be earned at your level by exchanging things with the God Box or by performing quests given by higher beings.

“Isn’t it interesting how the System changes the names of things based on our conversations. For instance, it was the Store, now it’s the God Box. It’s like a constantly changing, modifying system. It’d be pretty cool if the System hadn’t just messed up our universe,” I said. How much for a potion of healing?” I asked the God Box.

Lesser Potion of Healing - Heals 30 points over 10 seconds. Costs either 30 mana, 30 Qi, 2 Agnis.

“Medium Potion of Healing - Heals 60 points over 20 seconds. Costs either 50 mana, 50 Qi, 4 Agnis.

“I guess it matters who asks,” Janet said. “Different selection, lower costs for Monsoon.”

“Well, he is the ‘owner’,” said Tanya. “I guess that makes a difference.”

“I guess so, plus in one more level, I’d be in a different tear or rank,” I said. “I’ll have to try it again when I go up a rank. I’m assuming this means I’m the official God Box Purchaser?”

They both nodded their heads.

“I can afford one Lesser Potion of Healing. Should I buy it?” I asked.

“Yes,” they both ordered.

So I said to the God Box, “I’ll take one Lesser Potion of Healing.”

The God Box glowed and then I knew two things: one - that I now had a potion in my inventory and, two - that I was now no longer in possession of one of the two Aurics I’d received for the trailer.”

“Speaking of which, I didn’t get any money for the Cadillac, I wonder why?”

“Well, it was 20 years old, these are the breaks! Break it up, break it up, break down,” said Janet and laughed. “Did it give you the potion? I didn’t see you give it any money? Plus maybe it did, maybe it just left the Agnis or, since it was 20 years old, the Cupros in place.”

“Good one!” I said. “And yes, it took the money and gave me the potion. In my inventory. And that would suck, just little piles of gold left wherever They took stuff. That just ain’t right! Wow, think of the parking lots at the Super Bowl. You could buy a country with that! But in any case, we checked, remember, other than my two Aurics, there was nothing there. So two Aurics for a caddy and a trailer. And, just so you know, the God Box doesn’t give change. It took a full Auric when it should have taken two Agnis. Another reason to not take responsibility for the God Box. People are gonna be pissed when they lose their gold pieces. Hell, I’m kinda pissed.” And restrained the impulse I had to hit the God Box like I would have a pop machine that ate my quarter. Fortunately, I wasn’t that stupid. I bet there are people that are though. Yep, a third or is it a fourth reason to not let people know I was the owner.

I accessed the inventory and sure enough in the upper right square, there was a single flask, well, more like a test tube with a rounded, flattened base pictured. I willed it to come out, once again not sure how I knew to do that, but I just did, it is so cool! and the tube appeared in my hand. It contained a lightly-glowing, red fluid that, when I removed the lid, smelled of fruit and mint. Maybe strawberries? But not quite.

I passed it to the girls and they both examined it and took a sniff. Janet put her finger over the end of it, got it wet and tasted it. “Tastes like it smells,” she reported. “Kind of minty, strawberry-ish. Oh, and of wind. A cool breeze on a hot summer’s day. Like stepping out of a hay barn and feeling a breeze running across your forehead and evaporating the sweat. And, once again, I have no idea how I can taste the wind, but that what the tasting brings to mind. Weird! Must be magic.”

They handed me back the potion and I stuck it back into my inventory. “So, what else?” I asked them. “Is there anything else that you want to ask this box?”

They both looked at the box and then shook their heads no.

“Wait! Wait! I want to ask another one,” said Janet. “What’s the physical stuff that You can do at my level? I mean, I know You probably can’t or won’t change my sex, but I’m interested in knowing just what You can do.”

Change hair color - permanent

Change hairstyle or pattern that it grows in

Change skin color

Change posture

Add 1 or 2 inches to height

Fix joint pain

FIx chest pain

Fix scars

Fix warts

Fix acne

Straighten teeth

Whiten teeth

Repair teeth

...

The list kept growing and scrolling downward. Basically, it was a list of minor fixes to the body or cosmetic enhancements. Stuff that you might be able to do in a salon (less permanently) or a visit to a doctor or a specialist, plus stuff that would take a plastic surgeon, and finally stuff that I had no idea how They’d do it. Add 1 or 2 inches to height, add a couple of inches elsewhere, fix posture? I mean how do you give someone an inch or two?

“Are you seeing this?” I asked. “Making someone an inch taller? Repair teeth?”

“Hey, boob jobs are on there too,” said Janet. “Who wouldn’t want to make their twins bigger?”

“Somebody going to be running for their life, maybe sometime soon?” said Tanya.

“Right,” said Janet. “I guess that makes sense. I guess that they could make them smaller too.” She glanced downward, “Sorry girls! I didn’t mean it!” Both she and Tanya cracked up. I just turned slightly red.

Just then the golden key dimmed and then brightened a couple of times. We gathered together and waited for what was going to happen.

Please make a selection or the God Box will deactivate for you until your next Rank.

“Anyone want anything?” I asked. “It looks like it’s going to shut down?” Both girls looked a little wistful at some of the options but said they were good. Shortly thereafter, the God Box’s light turned off and the thing looked like it was just another antique sitting there. It was strange, but I knew exactly how much each of the services cost and what services were available (at my level or rank). I still had no idea what the box could do for say a Mithril ranked person, but I couldn’t wait to find out. Also, I only had an idea of what physical enhancements the box could do for me or someone else. Since I hadn’t asked about anything else, I didn’t know what else it could do. I expected that it could give armor, weapons, magical abilities, traits or titles, as well as a whole bunch of other stuff, but I didn’t know that for sure. And once again, that knowledge was complete, like I’d always known it, but I hadn’t. It was like the currency information. Just suddenly there, but without the feeling of something being added to my mind. That was disturbing on so many levels. If they could add knowledge, maybe they could add memories too. Hi, this is your cousin Fid, who’s actually not your cousin Fid, but you remember the time that he pushed you out of the apple tree? The time he kissed your first girlfriend. Man, cousin Fid is an asshole. Then I decided to not think about cousin Fid anymore.