"Why is your dick out?"

"...."

The green humanoid creature spoke as it slowly approached me. Despite its aged appearance, its body was defined and muscular. As it drew nearer, I noticed more of its distinctive features.

It stood about 6.3 to 6.4 feet tall, with lean muscle mass. Its body appeared slightly emaciated, lacking some flesh, yet this creature didn’t seem weak or frail. Its movements were full of energy, and the way it approached me was sharp and intimidating, ready to respond in any given situation.

'This creature, this magnificent being, has an aura of savagery—brutal in a noble way.

Like a noble aura full... full of pride.

But pride in what? It doesn't matter; I want some of it.

There is an aura that captivates me.

It makes me want to follow it as well as listen to it.

It makes my inner self thirsty for something.

My blood is boiling; something has awakened in me.

In a good way, in a very good way.'

I thought.

The creature was clad in crude leather armor, interwoven with bones. Its ears were pierced with bone fragments, and a humanoid jaw hung from a string around its neck, along with animal teeth, like a macabre necklace. The leather armor was adorned with bones, trophies from past battles.

In its right hand was an iron spear, sharp and well-maintained despite its crude design, though slightly damaged and bent. A pair of bone axes hung at its sides, ready to be ripped from their bindings in an instant. On its left arm was a shield, crudely made from wood and leather.

Although he appeared to be a mere foot soldier, the dried bloodstains on its weapons and shield suggested otherwise. This was a seasoned warrior, not an old man seeking death, but It's an old man who buries the young.

'Beware of an old man in a profession where men die young.' a random phrase popped into my head.

Though I understood the thoughts in my head, they felt alien to me. Lost in my reverie, I failed to notice the creature closing the distance between us. Its intimidating aura became even more apparent as it drew nearer. When it was close enough, I realized just how tall it was—I barely reached its shoulder. Give or take.

'Damn, this guy is tall'

When he was close enough, I stood up, and we locked eyes. My hormones were raging, my heart pounding like a drum.

"You, which tribe do you come from? Where is your mark?"

The creature spoke in an overbearing tone. As it asked about my 'mark,' it showed me the back of its right hand, bearing a healed burn mark that had been roughly connected to create a symbol.

'Christ! This guy looks like he just discovered fire and decided to experiment with it,' I thought.

'Wait, who's Christ?' I wondered again.

"A... b... c... d..."

I tried to speak but couldn’t find the words.

"TALK TO ME, BOY!"

The creature's tone grew even more savage, and it roared at me. Startled, I blurted out the first sound that came to mind.

"Eeeeeeeegggghhhhhk!"

Apparently, he took my sudden incoherent outburst as an insult, and in a fit of anger, he instinctively raised its shield and struck me on the face. I staggered back, tripped, and fell.

'Ahh! Fuck, my head!'

I covered my swollen lips and glared at the creature. After that sudden assault, something finally surged within me. It wasn’t shit or piss, but something white emerged, covering my entire body.

"Oh, that's some killing intent right there. Impressive, a warrior spirit's external manifestation!"

The creature grinned, raining me with praises like a grandfather would praise his baby grandchild for calling him grandpa. But perhaps something awoke in him too, as he unleashed his own warrior spirit. The potency and ferocity of his aura intimidated me, but at the same time, my blood boiled.

I suddenly understood why I was so captivated—why I felt drawn and yearned for something. It was the warrior spirit within me, yearning to challenge him, to set him as my goal, to surpass and defeat him.

'Whew! Thankfully, it was just related to my warrior spirit shenanigans; I thought I was Geh there for a sec. What is Geh? Why are you Geh?'

"WHAT? CAN'T TALK?"

The creature looked down at me and asked again. I regained my composure and tried to stand up.

'Though my knees are weak, my arms are heavy, my palms are sweaty, and it's mom's spaghetti. Mom's spaghetti? What the hell is mom's spaghetti? Where are these random words coming from? I don’t understand them, but somehow they make sense,' I thought.

Once I got my bearings, I looked at him and nodded.

'Damn it, I wanted to ask so many questions, especially about what the hell is going on, but I'm afraid only gibberish would come out. I don’t want to get smacked again.'

Unauthorized usage: this tale is on Amazon without the author's consent. Report any sightings.

"Hmm, you can't speak, and there isn't any visible mark of which tribe you come from."

The creature mused, clearly deep in thought; it seems like he was channeling his inner brain cells to make sense of what was going on.

"An exile? No, exiles have their marks skinned off of them. A slave?"

He gazed at my body, looking for something.

"Definitely not. Too short to be a slave."

'Too short? It's my height right? Right?' I thought.

Then he further scrutinized my body again, but this time with intensity, as if realizing that if he were to add some intensity this time, there might be a different outcome.

'This guy is insane; stop staring at me like that. It might awaken something in me.'

After another moment of contemplation, he sighed and looked back at me.

"Boy, I don't know where you come from, but the gods have spoken and rallied for bloodbath. Some savage, puny, uncultured meat bags have lost their way. Luckily for them, we found their traces. Now... kill.... die... death... mate... drink... sacrifice... join us... together... as one..."

As he continued spouting what seemed like propaganda, my thoughts were slowly piecing together all the information. And then it finally hit me.

'I'm fucked; it seems like I'm at the wrong place at the right time. Fuck me. What does fuck mean? How do I unfuck myself? Oh my God! This guy just won't stop yapping. God? Sigh! Let's see if there is a way to politely and enthusiastically decline whatever pyramid scheme this guy is cooking. Pyramid scheme? Let's see, hmm... there has to be a way to do this without offending him and getting myself killed in the process' I thought.

"Son of a BITCH! I'm in!"

I blurted out, unsure of what it meant, but the creature’s reaction was one of surprise and ferocity. I had no idea what I had just said, but I'm definitely sure he understood it.

'He sounded upset, well I did reject his invitation and he even sounded enthusiastic about it; message sent, message receive, nailed it, I guess. Nail?' I thought

"I thought you couldn’t speak. Anyway, that rude remark was uncalled for. I’d be wearing your jaw as a trophy by now, but since you are so full of vigor in wanting to prove yourself to the gods, I’ll forgive you."

He nailed his spear’s butt to the ground and ripped the bone axes from his waist.

'Huh? Missinput! Missinput! MISSINPUT!'

I panicked as the realization hit me.

'Message sent, message unread.'

"Weapon? Here."

He handed me both of his bone axes. I gripped them tightly, feeling a domineering aura radiate from within me. A wild, savage energy surged, and my blood boiled with the anticipation of using these weapons.

The axes weren’t short; they were about the length of a standard metal axe, but made entirely of bone. Despite being bones, they were heavier than metal axes. One side of the head was grounded down to form a sharp bit, while the other side served as the butt.

Well, if you smack someone with it hard enough until it chips away the bit, it can be renamed a club or a blunt weapon.

These weapons wouldn’t cut flesh cleanly due to their lack of sharpness. Instead, they would tear through the skins and muscles, breaking bones if they struck the right spot—a gruesome way to die.

After handing me the weapons, the creature turned and walked quickly toward where the rest of the green humanoids had gone. Something inside me told me to follow him. This was my destiny, my story’s canon, a premonition of what was to come.

So, I looked at the axes one more time and hurried to catch up with the creature, like a kid after getting a free candy and followed the stranger into the van. As our pace increased, he kept talking, and I just nodded along.

From walking to fast walking, we kept on talking. Well, he kept on talking. Then to jugging, and as our pace increases, his yapping increases.

"Now, I have no idea why you're fully naked out here in the forest, and we don't really bring any extra clothes with us, but there's nothing to worry about; you can always salvage some equipment from the fallen allies and enemies. By the Gods grace... self sacrifice... yapping... death... yapping... theirs... ours... In battle... yapping... life expectancy... 3 to 7 seconds... first initial charge... 4 to 10... flank... more yapping..."

I just kept nodding and nodding as he kept on yapping and yapping.

'Sounds good. Wait what? Di-did I just miss heard something? Well, I'm already inside the van, and it's locked. This next stop better be Disney Land. Van? Disney Land?'

"So, within a minute, you should be fully geared from head to toe. Seeing how excited you are, then let's stop wasting time lest we anger the gods and deprive us of glory."

After some time, we finally saw some silhouettes at the end of the forest. Of course, before we saw those silhouettes, unintelligent shouting and war chants could be heard from afar; we just had to follow those noises.

We joined the horde of muscular green creatures—known as gym bros. It was like attending a chaotic, noisy concert, reeking of armpits, with no semblance of order. Everyone was pushing to get to the front. The creature joined the mass, gesturing for me to squeeze in beside him. Since I was shorter, they didn’t notice an exhibitionist slipping into their ranks.

As I forced my way through, daggers, sharp bones, and blades poked my naked body, leaving cuts and drawing blood. By the time I reached the front, I was bleeding everywhere.

'Who's the dumbass? That's right, it's me! Now, where's my Darwin Award? '

I ridiculed myself for going full retard back there, and since I couldn't help but notice a lot of movement and curiously observe these so-called meatbags,.

Then, after a few seconds of satisfying my curiosity, it finally hit me, and I choked on my saliva.

"THIS ISN'T DISNEY LAND!"

'Whatever I just shouted probably came from the bottom of my heart and represented what I'm truly feeling right now.'

In front of me were rows after rows of fully armored humanoid creatures in a neatly tight formation, a variety of weapons and equipment, grouped in some sort of company, a group, or a party.

Facing our horde, multiple companies of fully armored soldiers from head to toe with large shields painted in red almost covered their whole body and wielding a long spear with a crescent moon shape attached to the side of the spear's head with a neatly tight formation, leaving no gaps; not even a fart could pass through.

On the slanted slope behind them, you could hear horns blasting and shouts being echoed from the sophisticated, even more shiny-armored men riding some sort of four-legged beast.

'Those four-legged beasts looked awesome as hell. Awesome? Hell?'

After hearing those horns or shouts, a light armored company from the back would move in a neatly tight formation, systematically move as one, and reposition themselves in an orderly manner.

These multiple companies of lightly armored humanoid creatures formed a neat square formation, arranging each of their companies in straight, orderly rows, seemingly pulling some sort of string tied to both ends of the stick as it bent, and a shorter thinner wooden stick is loaded and pulled along with the string.

And between these companies of heavily armored creatures at the front and lightly armored humanoid creatures at the back, there were companies slightly more armored than the back companies, with smaller but round shields compared to the front companies, with the smaller round shield on their left and a medium-sized double-edged sword on the right and some sort of small spears at their back.

'You call these meat bags uncultured and savage? Then what about these gym bros behind me?'