“It is still a mystery why Cosmos’s will of freedom only passes down through the Polus royal line. While it is a civilization that has stood strong for well over a thousand years, the first King—Arthur—is by no means the original inheritor.

“No, The Monarch’s Wings appears in records, although sparse, even before his kingly ascension. Arthur’s ancestors were a nomadic and solitary folk, basking in the freedom granted upon them through Cosmos’s wings, and ancient scrolls depict them as wandering souls unburdened by the follies of man around them.

“So…just why did Arthur break that tradition? Why did he choose to share those wings for all to adorn? This is but a small bias of mine, but I think Arthur believed his kin to be selfish. What use is there in freedom when it only belongs to a select few? It must have been a lonely existence to be the only one soaring through the sky, and so he anchored himself to the earth, sowing the seeds for a future where everyone may rise towards the boundless Stars above.

“How tragic then that the one gift he wanted to share would be forever chained to his descendants—some willing to further his dream, and others shackled by it.”

Arch Magus Virgil, Ruler of Augurium

———

Ascalon

Ascalon…

A voice. It’s calling out to me, but what for? I feel as if I’m lost—spiraling through a cold, empty void. Someone is reaching towards me, desperately trying to pull me out, but I don’t know those faces. I don’t know that touch. It’s a warm and comforting feeling, but at the same time I can’t help but cower under their gaze. What do they want from me? Why do their faces look so solemn?

Ascalon!

What was I doing before this? Strange, it feels like I left something behind, something important, but what? Every part of my body is screaming to go back, yet I don’t know where it wants me to go. A promise…something about a promise. What did I-

ASCALON!

A sudden force jerks me awake; sweat drips down my ashen face as a little girl comes into view. Surasha is pouting in front of me, her bony body covered in dirty rags, and slams her tiny fist against my stomach.

“Hungry,” she says.

Ah, that’s right. I-I’m taking care of Surasha. That’s odd, I usually get up by the time the dawn peaks out, but to think I’d sleep in for so long. Was it something I ate? Those mushrooms are usually safe though…

Maybe it has something to do with that dream I just had. When I try to think back on it, an overwhelming wave of sadness washes over me. I…I must have lived a lifetime in that ethereal world, a me of the future that I’ll never see again. Just how did the Ascalon of that dream grow up? Although a trace of sorrow remains, there’s also something different. Something warmer. Something happier.

I hope the me of that world was able to become a hero. Although I know it’s impossible, I can’t help but look towards the sky above and imagine a grander purpose awaiting me. I-I know it’s foolish, that I’ll only get hurt if I don’t accept the reality around me, but these hands of mine want so desperately to reach out to those far away dreams.

But, why do I still feel out of place? Has the dream not ended yet? If only that were true, but the pungent smell of dirt and filth states otherwise. No, this is the real world, revolting though it may be.

I shake my head and pick Surasha up. I can’t dwell on this right now, she needs to eat or else the sickness will come for her again. “I’m sorry, your brother was just feeling a bit tired. I’ll find some food for you right away.”

“Ok…” she mumbles, struggling to keep her eyes open.

I look around our makeshift hovel for anything edible, but we’ve already picked clean most of our supply. Only muddy twigs and dried bark surround us, shielding against the wind and rain, and we can’t really eat the animal skins we use for warmth.

The forest has been yielding less and less of late, and I-I don’t really want to scavenge around the town if I can help it. Maybe the leaves serving as our bed will do? But Surasha needs real food and not just something to stave off the hunger. Something clean and not dirty. Maybe I can find something in a cave, but who knows what kind of animals lurk within them. It’s too dangerous, and I can’t risk leaving Surasha alone to fend for herself if I were to ever perish.

…Maybe I do have to go to town after all. It’s bright out, but I should be able to slip in unseen as long as I’m careful. I’ll be fine if I stay in the shadows.

The main problem will be getting out unharmed. Food has been hard to come by even for the villages ever since the Nox started their raids around the border. Crops are razed, cattle are slaughtered…there are a lot of other kids like us just trying to survive. While Surasha and I left the village since it’s too dangerous, a lot of the other unwanteds chose to stay even if it meant getting harassed by the villagers.

I can’t risk getting into a fight with them. I’ve been weak ever since the day I was born, and Surasha is prone to getting sick as well, so it’s no wonder we were chosen to be kicked out by mom and dad. I have to stay safe; there’s no one else we can rely on. We’re alone.

Even though it’s been a couple of years, I can’t bring myself to hate them. There were just too many mouths to feed, and when I saw their faces as they kicked us out…I know it tore them apart to do it. I can still see their tears begging for me to forgive them, and I have. I have a long, long time ago.

That’s why I can’t bear the thought of running into them again in the village. How would they react if they were to see me now, still somehow alive but struggling just to make it to the morrow? Would they take Surasha and I in again? No, what’s done is done. Even though I’ve forgiven them, we can’t ever go back. This is, and will always be, our life.

“I’m sorry Surasha, but I have to go outside for a bit,” I say as I set her down on the bed. “Is it ok if you wait just a little bit longer?”

“Come back?” She murmurs, hands latched around my leg.

“Always, I promise.”

After hesitating a bit, she lets go and snuggles herself under the pile. With a big yawn, she closes her eyes and drifts off to sleep.

After wrapping myself in some muddled clothes, I grab my weapon—a splintered metal pole more meant for intimidation rather than actual harm—and set out for the village. It’ll probably take an hour or two on foot, though maybe I’ll be lucky enough to find some fauna to bring home. I haven’t seen any for a couple of months now, probably because of the Nox’s tampering with the forest, but there’s been no sign of any legionnaires in a fortnight so maybe some of the wildlife have trickled back.

I shouldn’t count on it. If some wildlife do come back, the village hunters will probably reach them before I can. All I can do is scavenge for any scraps left behind.

Well, I should be wary of the more dangerous beasts first before I can even dream of feasting on some meat. I wouldn’t have to go to the village in the first place if I was strong enough to hunt them, but…I’m scared. I’ve always dreamed about being a warrior, but when you’re actually in a life or death encounter, the reality is much, much more terrifying. Your skin pricks as if tiny little blades are stabbing into you; your breath becomes haggard from concentration; and time itself seems to slow down as you nervously analyze their every move.

I’ve only experienced that feeling once before when I happened across an injured Nox deserter. I still remember the raw hatred and desperation in their eyes filled with a fury willing to swallow everything within their gaze.

I could have finished them off—collapsed and on the verge of death as they were—and come back as a hero with their head triumphantly in my arms, but something inside of me refused to step forward. Right in front of me was the cause of all my suffering, a symbol of torment serving under the Nox’s banner, but I couldn’t do it. I couldn’t kill them. Instead, I ran.

I ran away with all my strength until every part of my sole was shredded and bloodied, all in an effort to escape a ghost long vanished from sight.

Enjoying this book? Seek out the original to ensure the author gets credit.

I’m not a hero, just a coward. But even someone like me has a purpose. A reason to keep on living no matter how harsh the world is. If I can’t find a reason within me, then I just have to live for others. For Surasha.

Haaah…why am I thinking about the past now? I thought I banished these feelings long ago, but ever since this morning, I can’t help but be plagued by a sense of nostalgia. Strange, when did I start thinking like an adult? Even my words are a bit more mature. Maybe a part of my dream self stuck with me when I woke up.

Crunch. A sudden sound snaps me back to the present. A beast? Maybe prey? No, the sound is much clunkier. It sounds like metal.

I drop onto the ground and hide myself under a bush, scanning the area for the source. Damnit, I should have been more cautious. What’s wrong with me today?

There’s someone in the distance. They’re not far, maybe…forty paces away. Their figure is still a bit obscured, but the bronze gleam shining off of the armor is unmistakable.

It’s a Nox scout. Not injured, not deserting, and they’re heading straight in the village’s direction.

I, what should I do?

The village has managed to stay hidden for years, but if even a single soldier finds it…

I don’t know. I-I don’t know. I’m not really attached to it, much less the people, but I-I can‘t just stand by and do nothing.

But…what can I do? By the time I get there, the scout will already have reached the entrance. I can’t stop the village from being discovered, but maybe I can convince everyone to run away. After all, it’s better to live right? You can’t do anything when you’re dead. You can’t protect anyone when you’re dead. It’s better to flee and hope the other villages will take them in.

No. I already know that no one will listen to me. Why would they? I’m just an abandoned wretch. Unwanted. A reminder of what they’ve thrown away. They’ll probably think I’m just causing trouble out of revenge for how I’ve been treated.

I-I should just leave it be. Surasha and I will be fine even without them. We’ve managed to survive in the forest for years; we’ll be able to survive a couple more. Even if the Nox start to occupy this area, we can always move towards the capital.

We won’t be able to enter the city itself, but even the outskirts are much safer than out here. I’ll make an honest living doing labor and helping out the caravans, and once we’re older and I’ve saved up enough money, I’ll be able to enroll Surasha in an academy. She’ll leave this life and pursue a dream of her own, and me…well, I’ll rest peacefully knowing that her future won’t be limited like mine. I’ll be happy. I’ll be content. I-

…Before I know it, I’ve already thrown my spear. It manages to hit them in the leg and they yell out in pain, but it doesn’t look like it really hurt them all that much. They pull it out effortlessly and stare straight at me, their glowing red eyes burning with rage.

I’ve really done it now.

I don’t know why, but I have this feeling that if I leave now I’ll regret it for the rest of my life. Images of the village’s future flood into my mind; everything is razed to the ground in a sea of blood and corpses—our home, my home, forever tormented by the memories of the dead.

And in that vision, I see the charred remains of my parents desperately wrapping my other siblings in a final, loving embrace. Their faces are burned beyond recognition—mouth agape in horror for all of eternity—but at least they’re together in the end, wrapped around the arms of the ones they love most.

Anger. Grief. But most of all, regret. The Ascalon of that dream…I can feel his sorrow in this future of mine that has yet to happen. In this future, Surasha and I are truly alone, and I would never be able to forgive myself for abandoning everyone in my moment of cowardice.

I’m sorry Surasha. Please forgive this foolish brother of yours, but I-I want to be selfish just this once. With this, maybe I can finally reach that far-off sky above. Maybe I can finally be a true hero.

In an instant, the soldier charges at me and I run towards the opposite direction as quickly as I can. Not a word leaves their mouth; only a crazed determination lightens their step.

They’re faster than me, but I know this forest better than anyone. I leap through the thickets, trudge through the marshes, and curve through every twisting pathway and trail that I can think of. I don’t need to fight; all I have to do is lure them far away from the village and lose them once I’ve gained enough distance. Once nighttime falls, the beasts shall handle the rest.

But right before turning another corner, a sharp whizzing sound flies right past my head. What…What was that? I look back for a moment to find the Nox soldier pointing a strange, metal object at me. Something clicks, and suddenly a small chunk of metal smashes straight into a tree right next to me, completely piercing through the bark and filling the forest with a deafening screech.

I’m dead. I’m dead if that hits me. I-I’ve never seen such a weapon before. What in Cosmos’s name is that? How could I be so foolish to think I’d be able to escape a Nox soldier of all people? Nerves overtake me and regret begins to bubble up from inside. Is this how my life is going to end? Pathetically slumped over and alone in the dirt and mud?

No, I chose to do this; I can’t regret it now. This place will not be my grave.

I slide down a hill and sprint into the darkness of a cave nearby. I don’t want to go through here, but I’d rather take the chance of encountering a beast rather than be plagued with a barrage of steel. He won’t be able to attack with his weapon in the dark.

The cave stretches on for what seems like an eternity as I charge through the caverns, all-the-while accompanied by the rhythmic echo of steeled footsteps stomping behind me. I’m confident I can adjust to the dark faster than the legionnaire, but the difference won’t last for long. I have to find another way to lose them, and fast.

Along the way, I notice a small crack overheard. I won’t be able to fit in it, but…I still have the small, sharpened piece of metal I broke off from the spear before I threw it. There’s no other option.

I jump up and jam the shard into the crack, hugging the cold stone as the Nox soldier passes through obliviously right below me. Since I’m barefoot, he doesn’t even notice that I’ve stopped running.

I hang there in silence for a moment. Then another. Then another. I think they’re gone now.

I manage to hold in a sigh of relief and quietly drop down onto the floor. The moment I land, I run straight back to the entrance. They’ll notice eventually that I’m gone; I have to make it back before that happens.

My feet are bruised like never before, swelling up in patches of dark blue and purple, but I don’t care. I would even crawl out with my bare hands if it means I can finally escape.

Finally, I reach the entrance. A beautiful blue sky greets me as I emerge out into the light. I-I did it. I made it out. I saved everyone. Surasha will have to wait a little bit longer for the food, but right now, in this moment, all I can think about is collapsing on the ground and taking a nice, long rest. I-

A searing pain suddenly hits me in the back, and when I look down, there’s blood dripping from a large hole in my stomach. Why? I-I…

The Nox soldier walks out behind me, armor abandoned and feet bare, and glares at me as I writhe on the ground in a puddle of my own blood.

It hurts. I-It hurts. It happens so suddenly, the pain so instant, and what comes after is a searing burn spreading throughout every corner of my chest. I can’t breathe. Every muscle in my body refuses to answer to me, and I’m left helpless as I’m lifted off of the ground by the scruff of my neck.

“To think I’d have to go through so much effort to catch a dirty runt like you,” they growl, tightening the hold on my neck. “Now here I am, stuck in the middle of this damned forest. I must have been close to the settlement if they sent a wretch like you to pester me.”

I try to respond, to spit in their face in one last act of defiance, but the pressure on my neck won’t allow me to do even that.

“No matter. I’ll find my way eventually, but not until I finish dealing with you for wasting my time. Farewell.”

They raise their weapon and point it at my face.

So this is how I meet my end. Hah, should I be happy at least that I was able to lure him away? Instead of a hero, I guess I’ll become a martyr. An unknown one, but I’m glad I managed to do something useful before my final breath.

I squeeze my hand, tensing myself for the inevitable, but something pricks at my skin. What? It’s…It’s the shard. It’s still in my hand.

Move.

Summoning every last fountain of strength left in me, I jab the shard straight into the soldier’s neck and we both tumble onto the ground. They sputter and gasp as they clutch onto the wound, but I’m not done. I’m not going to waste this chance.

I crawl towards them and raise my fist up high, smashing it into the soldier's skull.

Again.

And Again.

I keep pummeling their face until my fist is soaked in blood, and then I pummel them some more until my bones are shattered and poking out of my skin.

But I don’t stop. Not until their entire face is pulverized into a fleshy clump of battered sinew and muscle.

When I finally run out of strength, all that remains of my hands are bony stumps. The soldier’s dead.

I fall pathetically on the dirt. This is it. I’m going to die soon.

I’m sorry for breaking our promise Surasha. I-I’m a failure of a brother, but I hope you can forgive me. You’re strong, much stronger than me, and I know you’ll survive in this damned world even without me. Please, be happy. Grow up and find a dream of your own worth living for.

…I always thought death would be painful, that I’d spend my last moments in agony until Cosmos finally comes to take me with her to the Stars above, but it’s surprisingly peaceful. The pain in my stomach has long passed, and I can’t feel my hands anymore. A wave of serenity washes over me; it’s nice. I-I’m starting to feel a bit tired. I think I’ll close my eyes for a little bit.

Just…a little.

Ascalon…

It’s that voice again reaching out towards me. But unlike before, I’m not scared. Those faces are starting to become a little familiar.

Ascalon.

I am no longer lost. The Ascalon of that dream and the Ascalon of the past…we’re one and the same. We have our regrets, our moments of weakness that we look back on wishing for a chance to go back and right our wrongs, but the past is the past. A dream is a dream. We can’t stay here forever, not when there’s a world filled with possibility waiting for us.

Ascalon!

I think it’s time I wake up.