Dylan sat down exhausted from, you know, the world being shattered. She spotted a flower girl - a young flower girl who seemed to be just a few years older than she was. "Do you mind if I sit down?"

"Of course not, madam," said the flower girl as Dylan sat down.

"Happy to finally see a friendly face in the sea of unrelenting bleakness and unknowingly weird meanness."

Of course she didn't see the flower girl cunningly clutching a small dagger ready to strike at her. It was just then a giant halibut went right up to the throat of the young flower girl.

If you spot this story on Amazon, know that it has been stolen. Report the violation.

"What's going on?" said Dylan.

"She was about to stab you and kill you," said one of two giant bearded Vikings.

"That's not true. I was just gonna threaten you, but I totally changed my mind on you. We're best friends. How's it going best friend? Can you save me now that we're best friends?" said the flower girl who's name was, as mentioned, Eliza.

"No, you were gonna try and rob me," said Dylan.

"They're gonna do worse. They're gonna kill you, right?" said Eliza.

"Yeah," said one of the bearded men.

The other bearded man who was clearly the brains of the operation hit him hard.

"No, we aren't going to."

"Help me out, because they're going to kill you too," said Eliza.

Dylan ducked down, using all the instantaneous training that two years of journalism club and a year on the high school improv team had taught her. She quickly ducked down and hit the guy straight in the family jewels. Both Eliza and Dylan ran, like, a lot.