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A Will to Recognize
1. FUCK YEAAAHHHH!!!

1. FUCK YEAAAHHHH!!!

[The Host has awakened.]

I thought I heard a voice, but that voice wasn’t intimidating, nor was it angelic in any sense.

I could not have been more assured that I had died, yet here I was. Even if I weren’t dead, I should have been in a white room with a bunch of plugs and cords stabbed in me. Such a hospital horror story may even be more invigorating than living life normally.

My bed gave a creak as I bent forward to a sitting position. My prized body had shrunk to a nonexistent degree, and my legs reduced to a pair of wee little sticks.

‘Reincarnation?’

[Commencing initial start-up.]

‘My hearing is… Hallucinating?’

I turned around.

The fictitious life-form I had fabricated within my mind was blown apart in seconds as a slight shock rammed the back of my head. It stung, but not in a painful manner, but the sensation of pouring hot water down the back. It was that uncomfortableness that allowed a yelp to escape when flinching. The one that forced an involuntary blink at the single moment that required the most focus.

That illusion soon superseded my visuals as I found myself in a pitch-black space.

My vision that I thought belonged to me and me alone was stolen away as a small circle was all I could see. It wasn’t any circle, but a shiny one. A circle that was shiny. A circle that’s shiny. That’s one shiny circle… No matter how it was described, there’d always be some mention of that shine, as if it were expelling some form of radiation. A toxic light. Perhaps it was the same light that enticed moths.

The floor was blackened to an invisible degree, but I somehow knew exactly the right steps to take. The child-like body I possessed was not at all hard to pilot in spite of my inexperience with being a child.

Every stride gave a glimpse into the circle I had not noticed before. With every spark that fell from the candle, it grew.

It was this unparalleled form of growth that could not be underestimated from afar. It refused to be anything other than glorious. The colors that did not render previously had exploded in depth at some time, and it was only the beginning. A beginning that I had a tie with. That call that urged a return to the origin was awfully familiar—as in the déjà vu quality of nostalgia. This light that brimmed with the most life also happened to be in the darkest pit of space.

At some point, it had become three-dimensional and the colors formed individual sectors all of equal proportion. Its geometry became all the more complex with the circle soon distinguishing itself from the rest of its celestial body. While in the form of a man-made invention, I was unable to follow what it was meant to do or what my purpose for witnessing it was.

Unrecognizable symbols were scripted in a luminescent ink, or engraved—some mystical presence blessed the words with an unholy meaning. It went through each color, running tangential but never in conflict with another symbol. The vibrant colors each represented something, that much I was sure of. Whether it was wicked in nature or a shadow of virtue, I did not know.

A handle had appeared at some point when I confronted the giant wheel. It was larger than any tire—and may have been bigger than the infamous wheel of fortune with the only difference being that it was standing upright.

[Spin the wheel.]

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‘A god?’

No property of that mechanical voice was compelling, but I did it anyway; perhaps I was in awe of my own mortality, or a sense of reverence to this unfathomable being, or more probably, I was just an incorrigible cat.

Simple curiosity needed no embellishment.

Placing my tendered hand on top of the handle, I pulled downward only for it to not budge. Trying again with two hands only proved the task harder. The experience was the same quality as pulling a tree off the ground with roots intact. It was that feeling of exposure that every conscious being was familiar with.

Since pulling would not work, I jumped up to push it down with the entire weight of my body. The fire of life rekindled itself as the machinery gave a loud creak, issuing for the wheel to accelerate faster than I could comprehend despite not having built up any initial velocity. The amount of force I could generate with my body weight should not be capable of resulting in such intense mechanical output. And yet, the spinning gear was right in front of my eyes. Maybe it was best to dispose of my common sense while I could.

I occasionally saw glimpses of a rainbow and other times, a complete black that camouflaged with the very space it resided in. As the wheel slowed down, I could better see the rotating colors from red to purple with many different hues and tones in between. There were also shades of black and grey, but nothing remained of white.

I could hear the being that set up this elaborate machination chuckle as the wheel came to a halt.

The handle was still pressed down even when I had separated from it which only reinforced my sense of expectancy.

This expectancy wasn’t anything major, as I did not know what to expect. There was nothing to pay attention to, and more annoyingly, the arrow that accompanied such a carnival wheel was missing. The disappearance of such an indicator may have been what evoked this unease. I might be taking this too calmly.

“I wonder if I should freak out.”

Obviously don’t do that, you buffoon.

“Hmm.”

‘Errrr…’

“I guess I should stop talking to myself.”

‘I’m probably going to end up talking to myself again, but—wait, there’s no one here anyway.’

I looked around to confirm that the black space around me was indeed, completely black…

Well, I wasn’t about to do anything absolutely utterly fucking unnecessary now, was I?

This may be some lottery game, but that notion of this being a game was backed by my idea of reality, which was currently crumbling by the second. This situation wasn’t something I had no answer to and it served as a testament to my crazed mind. There was no supernatural force compelling me to do anything, or maybe there was and I was simply ignorant of it. Either way, I pushed a lever for the sake of pushing a lever. I didn’t know why, but I did it…

‘Maybe I was supposed to be surprised? Am I surprised?’

‘But does it matter?’

That’s right.—I could have denounced everything as a dream or said that this was my personal hell, but there would be no point in stating the obvious if it were true.

This calm rationale in my mind may be a figment of my self-perception, but that didn’t matter. Even if this is what they identified as lunacy, it no longer mattered. None of my preconceived notions should matter now that I am dead… Was dead? Who would know?

[Order ζ has been manifested.]

[Setting system-type: Crouching Dragon System (Mythical)]

[System-type skill; received: Blurred Eyes (Epic)]

[Received: 3,000 Merit Points]

[Cursed: Unnoticed Potential (Legendary)]

[Showing immediate status.]

~~~~~~~~~~

Name: Daniel

Race: Human

System: Crouching Dragon System (Mythical)

Merit Points: 3,000

Life Force: 80/80 (8 years)

Techniques: N/A

Active Skills: Blurred Eyes (Epic)

Passive Skills: N/A

Curse: Unnoticed Potential (Legendary)

~~~~~~~~~~

“I’m FUCKING Immortal!” I shouted…

“...”

For no reason in particular.