“WHERE THE FUCK DO WE GO AFTER THIS?” Guy’s wife calmly asks.

“North.” North was the direction where one would find the Great Mountains, dominated by trolls. Hopefully the right kind too.

“OKAY!” calmly shrieked the woman known as Girl Dudettewoman before hitching a ride on Guy’s back. “LET’S GO.”

And so they went off to the north. As snow began to cover the trees and ground (Despite it being the middle of summer), they knew they were getting closer to their destination. When gigantic mountains piercing into the sky like swords came into their view, they knew they were in the north.

And it only took…what, five minutes? That wasn’t so long.”

“GET ME UP THERE.” Girl politely screeched.

“Throw?” asked Guy.

“NO, FLY. WITH YOUR WINGS.”

“Oh.” He did the obvious thing and flew like a rising eagle, up beyond the mountains, to their snow-capped tips. There, he saw trolls. Big hairy humanoid creatures, with stocky frames and rough faces. They were all level 2. Just like him.

This tale has been unlawfully obtained from Royal Road. If you discover it on Amazon, kindly report it.

“Wife! They’re level 2!” he shouts. 2 is more than 1…right? So his wife stood no chance.

So why did she leap off of him and land by them? Is she stupid? He tried to save her (or delay the inevitable) by landing right after her…but it didn’t work.

Mostly because the trolls were already slain.

LEVEL UP!

Said the imaginary voice in his head. He deposited stats as always: everything into Might. This time, from 2 to 4. His wife went from 1 to 4.

“THAT WAS FUN. LET’S DO IT AGAIN.”

“Okay.” said the husband. And so the couple slaughtered every troll they saw. At the end, they reached level 30.

When they stopped gaining levels is when they stopped fighting.

“This is just like when we started.” thought aloud the man. “No growth.”

“YES.” screeched his wife.

“So where to go next?” the man asked.

His wife looked up and saw several titanic masses of floating stone and soil in the sky. “HORSELORD DOMAIN.”

“Oh, of course.”

And so they flew to the horselord domain. The first thing they saw was a horselord (a muscular shirtless man with the head of a horse) with gigantic gold necklaces and wristbands, a massive club in his right hand, and a massive sword in his left, speak.

“hey guys what are you doing up here? did you fool about with those trolls?” he asks politely.

“YES.”

“wow, you’re loud. anyway, could you solve a few problems for me?”

They thought about it.

“No.” and then they fought. After a long battle (which consisted entirely of two people ganging up on and attacking another who couldn’t even fight back most of the time), they won and leveled to level 30.

Due to this, more horselords appeared. They cried and screamed and howled…for what reason? It is unknown. In either case, the couple slaughtered them anyway.

When all was said and done, they were level 60, laying in a mountain of corpses, surrounded by rubble.

“Is that all?” asks the man.

“NO.” The woman points up. There is the sun. And the next destination.