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Within the tears of love

Within the tears of love

It was a sunny morning when Evelyn went outside to hang up the family’s laundry on the clothesline. She took her basket full of clothes out to her backyard and started pegging them on to the clothesline. The air had a fresh crisp smell to it that reinvigorated her old and cranky 46-year-old body. The atmosphere was so calming that she was afraid that it could be disturbed by even a rustling leaf.

Pegging up the clothes didn’t take that long, as she only had a few sets to hang up, and she was pretty quick at it because she had decades of experience. She went inside to return the basket and remembered that the post office was getting a load of letters today. She was planning on going as she was hoping that she would receive a letter from her sons. It had been a long time since she had seen them, and she was missing them dearly. Two of her precious sons had been sent off to war, leaving only her husband, her daughter, and her home alone. Her husband would’ve gone to war, if not for him being too old to serve. She was glad for that fact, as she didn’t want to lose another person.

“Henry, dear, I’m going to the post office to see if our sons sent us some letters. Do you need anything while I’m out?” Evelyn asked her husband.

Henry just shook his head and replied in the negative.

Evelyn had just arrived outside the post office when she spotted a long-time friend of hers. She called out to her, shouting “Marjorie! Hello!” and got her attention. Marjorie just gave her a glance and hurried over the second she recognised who it was.

“Evelyn! Fancy seeing you here! Here to get some letters from your boys?”

Evelyn nodded and replied with enthusiasm. “Yes! I also hope they got the care package I sent. It should remind them of home a little bit. I sent a few clothes I made myself, and some delicious cookies! I hope my boys enjoyed them, as I made them with all my love!”

“Oh my! All your love you say! That’s horrifying! Does that mean you have no more love to give them? Wouldn’t that make you heartless!” Marjorie joked in response.

Evelyn only laughed and waved her off, saying that if she only had such a small amount of love, then she’d have run out long ago! She shook her head, smiling, and then gave a “Goodbye!” to Marjorie, and went inside the post office. She looked around for a second, before heading to the ‘package receival’ line, and waiting. It would take a while, as letters from the war would only come once a month, and that was only if someone sent a letter!

She had waited for nearly half an hour before being the first person in line.

“Hello! Do you have any letters addressed to the Cooper or Caporn family?” Evelyn asked the person behind the counter. The clerk nodded and headed to check the letters piled up on the desk. Evelyn marvelled at the fact that such a large number of letters could pile up like a mountain on such a small desk, and yet not fall down no matter what. She thought it was simply amazing!

The clerk eventually came back with a letter in their hand, saying it was addressed to one “Mr. Henry Charles Cooper of Hector Street, Osborne Park,”. Evelyn nodded and confirmed that that was her husband, and their current place of residence and paid the small fee. She took the letter and walked out of the post office, heading home with a smile on her lips, and a spring in her walk. She didn’t want to open the letter with no-one else in her family present, as she thought that would be unfair.

When she reached her home, she barged inside and sang “I’m home! And with a letter from the post office! Everyone, come! We must open it together!”

Her husband and daughter each came from different rooms and sat at the dining table to hear her read the letter out loud. Evelyn sat at the head of the table, opened the letter, and started reading.

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“Mr. H.C. Cooper, Hector Street, Osborne Park, W.A

Dear Sir, we regret to inform you that, in December, No. 3382 Private J. W. B. Cooper of the 48th Battalion has been reported as… Missing in Action… in the Battle of Pozieres… on August 7th… What? What does that mean!? Is my son dead!? Why? NO! This can’t happen! Not to me!”

Evelyn’s outburst shocked everyone at the table. She started choking up and pausing in between words, almost to the point of hysteria, as she read the letter, but persisted, nonetheless.

“We have recently found his body… and shall find a suitable place to mark… as his grave shortly. … We are terribly sorry for any inconvenience… or problems… this… death… may… c- carry, b- but… w- w- we a- a- a- are unfortu- un- unfortunate- unfortunately— I can’t do it! I can’t read this letter! I hate it!”

By this point, Evelyn was sobbing uncontrollably, her tears falling fast. She had already flung the letter away in anger and sorrow. Her husband and daughter got up from their chairs, both crying, and comforted Evelyn. Her tears eventually slowed down so that she could read the rest of the letter, but at this point she was afraid to read more. She took a large breath in, and let it our slowly, forcing herself to pick up the letter and continue.

“We are unfortunately unable… t- to bring any h- help a- at this time. W- We apologise for… any troubles… this m- may c- cause… you.

It is the practice of the Commission… to notify r- relatives direct… when the headstones are f- finally… in position, and at a later date… the opportunity will be afforded you… of obtaining… a copy of the printed Register containing… full particulars… of all British and Dominion War Graves… in the Cemetery… of his residence.

Yours Faithfully, Captain, Officer i/c Base Records”

When Evelyn finished reading the letter, she sat there on her chair quietly, not making a sound. Her husband tried to get her attention after a minute of unresponsiveness. His attempts didn’t work a single bit. After he tried for a few minutes, his daughter tried to help him, but her attempts were as fruitful as her father’s. They both looked at each other, shaking their heads. Henry suggested that maybe the death of her son was affecting her this way, making her unresponsive. It was the best answer they had, and it was the only one they would get.

At the start, Evelyn only responding to a few words, if only a little bit. She would eat and drink when force-fed and would go to the toilet and sleep on command, but other than that she was a lifeless husk. After a few months, she started attempting housework, and the family was enormously grateful that she was a bit more lifelike. Her friends and people who cared for her sometimes popped in to check on her but didn’t stay long as they had other things to do.

Slowly, a year passed. It was now the September of 1917. It was a normal day in the Cooper household, when suddenly, Evelyn started sobbing uncontrollably. She started having a breakdown, crying loudly. She was on the ground in the foetal position and showed no signs of stopping any time soon. It took a few hours to calm her down, by which point she was already apologising profusely to her husband and daughter.

She explained that losing her son felt like losing half of herself, half of her identity, and she couldn’t take the fact that an important person in her life just died suddenly. Without warning. It shocked had her to her core. And so, she went in a downward spiral trying to convince herself that he was still alive. It took her a year to finally face the brutal reality of the truth. Her son was gone. And she could do nothing about it.

After that, she went back to doing the chores with a renewed light about her. She would hum as she did so, but once in a while, her husband or daughter would catch her looking into the distance with a blank look in her eyes. When they called her out on it, she would snap out of it and deny that it was actually happening. But they knew that the death of her son left a permanent scar on her, just one they couldn’t see. They tried helping her in any way they could, to no avail.

Every once in a while, she would smile at them for no apparent reason, and they would realise that their support did help, if on an unseen level. They were satisfied with that for now, but they wanted to help her more. One morning, Evelyn was pegging up the laundry, when she looked up to the sky and smiled. She saw a shooting star cut across the sky. She knew that it was her son, saying to her that he was happy and safe and healthy. She was immensely happy and wept on the spot. After that day, she came outside more often to watch the sky. She didn’t find anything. But she was satisfied with knowing her son was happy, wherever he was now.

And so the war marches on.