“So, I think we’re good now.”
Zijde looks at me sideways, “I’ll admit I was wrong, but can you blame me for thinking that the shields were a horrible idea?”
“Nope, I can’t blame you a bit Cap’n… hell, I was thinking about dropping the idea.”
It had been a rough couple of days for the crew, but we made it through it. The first day went great, until some of the crew decided to test the shields themselves. They were so drunk I guess they forgot about my warning about getting shot from the side. They lasted maybe 20 minutes before one of them was shot in the arm. He ended up losing his entire arm at the shoulder.
The next incident was when we were practicing boarding a ship bigger than ours. Zijde talked a merchant into letting us practice boarding his ship, and it went ok… at first. We quickly found out we needed heavier duty ladders with all the weight they had to support. When the first one broke, a man fell into the water, and he had trouble getting the shield off his arm. The shield sank him to the bottom of the harbor, 30 feet deep. Once he stopped sinking he could get the latch undone, but he was understandably shaken. We replaced the straps with a buckle that could be removed with a strong tug.
Then we found out how effective the shields were at stopping people. It’s great they work so well, but I just wish we didn’t find out on one of our men. We had practiced the boarding formations until the men got used to carrying the shields up the heavy duty ladders. They assumed the semi-circle formation, and planted their shields using the spikes. Then the rest of the crew was ordered to try and break up the formation without guns. At first they used sticks and poles, but that didn’t work. Then they start trying to shoulder their way through… didn’t work. Then one of the men tried to dropkick one of the shields over… not only did that not work, he broke his leg. I’m not talking about a small break. His leg full on splintered, bone shot through skin in three different places. Doc Zale ordered Zijde to quit ‘whatever the fuck you’re doing’, or he would quit his ship. He was understandably tired of chopping off limbs… two in three days is pretty bad.
Zijde smiles as he lights a pipe, “Yep, if the shields gave us that much grief, imagine how it’ll be for whoever we’re fighting.”
I laugh as I hang my head, “I really do hope so. Alright, I guess I’m going to go check on the munchkin. You need me for anything else Cap’n?”
“Not today Utah, but you do remember what we talked about? Women aren’t allowed on pirate ships… especially young women, it’s awful luck.”
Ah, there’s that legendary sailor superstition. I get why we can’t take her, but chalking it up to bad luck seems… cold. Life on a ship is dirty, hard, and dangerous. I wouldn’t want to subject any child to that.
“Yea, I gotcha Cap’n. You sure the priest can take her in, and he’ll be good to her?”
Zijde looks off, pondering what to say, “Do you know why most pirates and children don’t eat pork in Nassau?”
“I’m guessing the ‘long pig’ they’ve been eating doesn’t sit well with most people.”
“Right, but do you know why they are fed humans like that?”
“Getting rid of bodies?”
Zijde smiles and nods slightly, “Well yes, but Father has fed a lot of people to those pigs over the years. See, not only does Father run an orphanage, he also tries to find homes for the children. It usually works out great, the children get a sense of family and structure, and the adults get company and help working. That also helps the children, since they can learn a trade that way. Although, when Father first started homing these children, they would be abused in a myriad of ways. Well, then people ended up ‘missing’... and the child would be back in Father’s care. So, that’s why none of the pirates and children eat pork here in Nassau. Father isn’t the only pig farmer on the island, but he is the biggest.”
“Well, damn. I didn’t know that. Glad I do now though, and thanks Cap’n, that makes me feel better about the girl. I’d really hate for anything to happen to her.”
“I know you’ve gotten attached to her my friend. Hell, I think most of the crew has enjoyed having her around, but we can’t take her with us… I don’t think any of us could live with that on our conscious.”
“Yea, I gotcha… I’ll see you tomorrow Cap’n.”
Zijde just nods to me as I walk away. I make my way to the shack I rented out for the last few days. As I get closer to it, I look it over carefully. The last few times I’ve came back, that little shit has either ambushed me or played a prank. I see a tuft of hair sticking out on the top of the shack, and I bucket in front of it… suspiciously close to the edge, right over the door.
“I see you up there kid. Go ahead and push the bucket over. I’m not falling for it this time.”
The bucket falls over, spilling water everywhere. Although the tuft of hair isn’t moving.
“Are you just gonna stay up there?”
I hear giggling, and the tuft of hair disappears. I shake my head, smiling. I’ve enjoyed the last few days, but all good things have to come to an end. I think I’ll cook her some steak… basted in butter… I think the game has made spices more readily available. I should be able to find everything to make it tasty.
I walk through the door, and I’m met with a crazy amount of graffiti on the walls. There are empty inkwells, broken quill pens, and foot shaped smudges everywhere.
“Dammit kid, I was only gone a couple hours. How did you manage this? Also, where did you get all this ink? I know you didn’t buy them… what the fuck?”
I feel a tickling on my shoulder, and I swat at it. A six-inch stick insect flies off me, landing on the floor. How long has that been crawling on me?
“Where are you kid? I was wondering if you’d like a steak tonight? I can go pick it up and have it ready in an hour or so?”
Next thing I know, I feel something heavy land around my neck. I reach up to feel scaly, smooth skin, and a long slender body draped over my shoulder. I throw it, and I see a five-foot-long snake sail through the air, landing in the corner. It immediately slips through a crack in the wall, escaping outside. I look up to see a lizard suspended up above me… by a little girl’s hand. The hand opens, and I’m left scrabbling to try and dodge the foot long lizard.
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I watch as the girl across from me destroys a steak. I can smell the garlic and rosemary wafting up from the steak sitting in front of me. My mouth waters as I wait for the savory fats in the steak to cool enough to keep from escapnig as I cut into it. I tried to explain the concept to the little carnivore in front of me, but it fell on deaf ears apparently. She finishes her first steak, and reaches across the table, grabbing another one just as big. She’s probably eaten close to a pound of meat already.
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“I still can’t believe you cut off most of your hair just to play a practical joke on me.”
She just giggles through a mouthful of steak. I look at the coconut that has hair crudely glued on with lord knows what. I look back at her, and her shoulder length hair… that use to stop midway down her back.
“You did get me good though, I almost shit myself again when that snake landed on me.”
She looks up at me with a huge smile and even bigger cheeks. I hold her gaze for a few minutes before I break the methodical smacking, “Why have you stuck around me kid?”
She looks at me for a moment, and in that moment I thought she was about to talk to me… but she just shrugs her shoulders.
“You know, The Father could get you into a family to learn a trade, and be a part of a family.”
She jerks her head towards me… glaring at me for a moment. She slowly shakes her head.
I hold up my hands in defeat, “Damn kid… it was just a suggestion! No need to try and kill me with a look.”
She scoffs, and continues making steak disappear much faster than any little girl ever should be able to.”
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After a few more days training the crew and working through the plan with Zijde, it’s almost time to depart. I’m on my way to the Madam’s brothel to meet the priest. I of course have the little girl in tow. I thought about bringing her straight to the church, but I have my doubts that I could actually get her there. Zijde and I plan on shutting the door to the brothel before the priest shows himself, and I can only hope she can’t sneak off with a dozen eyes on her. I can’t help but think I'm being paranoid about this, but after all the shit I’ve seen her pull, I’m not sure.
“Utah! Hey Utah!”
I look back to see Billy dressed in the same clothes I bought him a few days ago. Although, when I bought those clothes, he didn’t have a tophat, cane, and a gorgeous woman on his arm.
“Billy, Sarah, how have you both been? I like the cane and hat Billy. Where did you get them?”
Beaming with pride he winks at me, “It was a gift from Sarah here. She ‘uh’ felt bad for taking your money after such a ‘pleasant’ few days.”
Sarah slaps the arm she’s holding, a warm smile ever present on her face, “ Ah, Billy! I thought you said you wouldn’t kiss and tell!”
Billy holds his free hand up, “Hey, when did I say anything about kissing? Utah, did you hear anything about kissing?”
I can’t hold back anymore, and I start laughing, “Hey now, don’t bring me into it. I’m just heading to the Madam’s to drop off...”I suppress the instinct to find out what look the little girl has on her face, “some coin to Zijde.”
Billy, oblivious to my near slip of the tongue, continues the conversation. His face lights up at the mention of the Madam, “Oh, Sarah and I are on the way to the Madam’s place as well. You see, Sarah has been saving up for years to pay off the loan the madam gave her when she was younger. At first she just did odd jobs for the Madam, but that was taking too long. She couldn’t start a relationship or family, since she couldn’t leave Nassau. So, adding what she’s saved and my share of the last prize, she’ll have enough to be free.” He turns to her, whispering, “With me.”
I start to say something, but the icy look Sarah gives me gives me pause. I think better than trying to get in the middle of Billy’s love life. If I tell him not to buy a prostitutes freedom, he’ll just do it anyways. Then, when she inevitably leaves him, he’ll have resent for me for driving her away… misplaced resentment, but resentment all the same.
I just sigh, and give them both a warm smile, “Good, I’m glad you’ve both had a wonderful time. I hope it all goes well.”
Sarah’s icy look melts as fast as it formed, and she directs it at Billy with her big, warm doe eyes, “Oh I’m sure it will darling. I’ll do whatever it takes to make sure it goes well.”
I hear an incredulous snort coming from beside me. We all look at the little girl pulling at my sleeve, urging me to continue. I guess I did say there was candy waiting for her where we were going. I look up to see Sarah red in the face, and Billy with his mouth agape.
Billy points at the little girl, “Uh, Utah… is she yours?”
I can’t help but chuckle, “Nah, this little shit isn’t mine. I’ve just been taking care of her. She doesn’t speak, so don’t worry about her saying anything. By the way, have you talked to Zijde about an advancement on your payment?”
Billy nods his head, “Yep, I ran it by him this morning.”
Sarah scoffs, “It was early afternoon dear. You were much too ‘busy’ to talk much this morning. Although, you excelled at the 'business' your were attending to.”
Billy turns redder than I thought possible, and I burst out laughing. Sarah giggles before turning to him, “See, it’s not much fun to be put on the spot, huh?”
About that time, I feel a small foot hit my shin. It didn’t really hurt, but I thumped the little girl’s forehead all the same, “Fine kid, lets go.”
She gives me a scowl, but spins on her heel and walks forward with determination… in the wrong direction.
“Hey kid, we were supposed to turn here. Where you off to?”
She pauses for a moment before spinning on heel again, this time in the right direction. She was looking down, hiding her face, but here bright red ears betrayed her embarrassment. The couple behind me starts to giggle, but I turn to give them a harsh ‘Ssshhh’. They have no idea how vindictive that child’s pranks can be.
A few minutes later, we find ourselves in front of the Madam’s establishment. The little girl points at the door, looking at me for confirmation. When I nod my head, she pushes the door open and walks in like she owns the place. I walk in after her to see a four foot girl wrinkling her nose, I can assume because of the horrible body odor, and her small hand out, waiting for her candy.
I scan the crowd until I find Zijde. I wave my arms trying to get his attention, “Hey Cap’n did you pick up what I asked?”
He walks over to me, pulling out a small bag. He extends it to me, but I simply nod to the girl. He turns to her, holding the bag out. She goes to snatch it out of his hands, but holds the bag just out of reach, “Say please, and I’ll let you have it.”
There is a sparkle in Zijde’s eyes… which is quickly replaced with tears after the little slams her little foot into his shin as hard as she could. He drops the bag, and she snatches it out of the air with ease.
The room erupts into laughter, and even Zijde can’t hold it in. Once he was done laughing, Zijde wipes a tear from his eye, “I suppose I was asking for that. I thought maybe I could bribe you into talking, but I suppose that wasn’t my brightest moment.”
After a few minutes, the girl had eaten several pieces of candy, and the crew was well on its way to getting plastered. I sigh, as it’s probably time, “Zijde, go get him. I don’t think this should be drawn out.”
Zijde looks at the little girl with a sad face before he disappears behind a door. A few moments later I hear footsteps from the largest man I’ve ever met.
I look down at the little girl, smiling as brightly as I could manage, “Hey kid.”
She looks up at me, sucking on the several hard candies in her mouth. Dammit, I’m actually gonna miss this kid. I swear I’ll hurt the priest, bad, if anything happens to her.
“So, I know you’re probably gonna be mad at me, but I really can’t take you with me.”
She shakes her head, and waves my comment away like I don’t know what I’m talking about.
I just smile, “Sorry kid.”
I look up to see the priest standing in the doorway… with a shocked look on his face, “Hybi? Is that little Hybi?”
The little girl freezes for a moment, but then her face flushes bright red. She spits all the candy out on the floor, and turns to face the priest. She glares at him for maybe a second before opening her mouth, “Fat priest.”
Two things shocked me about what Hybi said. First, the fact that she said anything was mind-blowing. Second, I didn’t know that a voice that sounded so innocent could be dripping with that much malice at the same time.