CHAPTER 2

Tao yells out for Tori to bring the log up. Tori lumbers up from the hold with a large bucket filled with rope knotted at even intervals and a flat piece of wood on the end of it. He also has a quiver with several javelins and two muskets strapped to his back. “Alright chinaman, here's your fucking bucket. Still don't make no damned sense to figure the speed. They gonna catch up, as sure as shit will stink. Don't need no fucking bucket to tell me that. The fuck'n cap'n loaded us damn heavy, here we be sittin' lower in the water than a whore smokin' a midget. O'course we were gettin' hit this time.”

The captain is red, and has a huge vein looking like it's about to explode from his forehead, “Watch how you talk to me you fucking simpleton, if you cross me you will not have a job at the next port. Nor will you be able to find a job at any port in the Caribbean you fucking ignoramus!”

Barely able to speak through his laughter, “Captain, calm down. It's a joke, I'm happy that we are getting attacked! It's been so long since anything excitin' happened, I thought I'd puke from boredom.”

“If you think that lets you off the hook, NO I will have your job, your big ugly ass will starve before you get another job. Do you know how much influence I have?”

Tori quickly goes from joking to irate. “I don't give a flying shit what influence you think you have, you think I give a fuck what your dumb-pig-ass thinks. I can get a job any fucking where!” The captain is now visibly shaking from anger and honestly looks like he might cry. Tori sees this and goes in for the kill, “Awe is the little piggy getting mad? Is he going to cry?”

I honestly have never seen someone so red. The captain is screaming now, “I am Captain Saehrimir of the East Branch of the Ouroboros Conglomerate...”

Stepping forward and putting his hand up to shush the captain, “Sir, the knowledge of which you speak could be trouble for us both. Also, Tori, I am Mongolian please stop calling me Chinese.”

The captain is slowly calming down now, “You're right Tao. Thank you, deal with the crew will you.” The captain shoots some fucked up look at Tori, which I guess is some piss poor attempt at intimidation. Tori just keeps laughing while he walks over to the edge of the boat. “Alright, Tao you are Mongolian. I still don't get why it matters, it's close enough to me.” He starts picking up the flat piece of wood, flips over a small hourglass and throws the piece of wood into the water. The rope starts sliding through his hands and he shouts the number of knots. “One knot, two knot, three knots, ehhhh it's about three n' a half knots Chinaman. I mean Mongoman.”

Shaking his head in disappointment, “My name is Tao, please call me Tao. Also, I guess they will be upon us in about an hours time. They’re slowing down considerably now that the wind is favorable...” Tao is basically talking to himself now.

“Do we get no swords?” one sailor asks.

Tori looks and smiles, and holy shit...those... gnarly browns, “Yea, yea you good for nothing scamps will get some fuckin swords. We just can't be havin' any of you getting no shit poor ideas is all.”

Little does he know, I already have two khukri machetes wrapped to my back and chest. Yes, that is as uncomfortable as it sounds, but I never know when I might need them. I'd be damned to get caught without them after how hard it was to find someone to make them. The high price was almost worth it since they were well tempered and made, but they have been poorly sharpened. It took hours and hours, a lot of crushed sand, and dozens of rags sharpen them to a keen edge. After that I started polishing the rest of the blade, polishing and polishing till one can be used as a razor and the other a mirror.

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After about 40 minutes the ship has made some serious progress towards us. As we are waiting for the swords to be brought out more of the captains regulars start piling out. They are very well armed, much more so than I had hoped. They all have at least one musket and two pistols. They bring out a crate with the swords and holy shit I am seriously glad I bought my own. They have some seriously shitty cutlery, there are a couple cavalry sabers, a few scimitars, a rapier, and I shit you not, a fucking Roman gladius. I feel sorry for the poor guys that have to make due with what's here. They are rusted, pitted, and worst of all, dull as our captains wits.

Speaking of our dear old employer, he's in the corner of the ship going from sickly white to sickly green. Tao is inspecting the swivel cannons, and Tori is actually clutching an amulet and mouthing a silent prayer, which surprises me. Another guard is passing out the shot and the powder and gives me 4 bags of mesh iron pieces and a good bit of powder. I sit down and start packing in the powder, and since I'm probably gonna only get one shot, I pack it with probably too much powder and 2 bags of shot. I pound it all in there, making sure everything comes out nice and uniform.

“Oi, grab your swords you bunch of cockless mongrels”, Tori barks. Snapping me back, Tori is walking towards me rather aggressively. He is a head taller than almost everyone on the shift despite being hunched over like most sailors. Tao is actually the only sailor I've seen with a straight back this entire time. He stops in front of me at eye level, “Are you going to pick it up or do you suppose you'll jus' scare 'em off do ya? You're big but that don't mean shite to pirates. They'll break down a big mule like you, and might mount ya after.”

I smirk at him, “I wouldn't count on it, now get out of my face before your breath causes me to fling myself overboard.”

“Ah so the cheeky bastard can talk, well, lemme fix ya pretty nose then.” He steps back to 'fix my nose' and goes for broke. It's a powerful punch, but it takes way too long. Without pause, I lower my head, tense my neck, and lean forward. As his hand connects with my forehead, I feel him Completely. Fucking. Destroy his hand. Yeah, I see stars, I might be nauseous from the sound, but he is on the ground screaming. Eh, one less person to worry about I guess.

Captain Piggy is all up in a fuss now, holy shit. “What in the hell are you thinking? They just raised the Black, and you have taken out our second best fighter. I should have you thrown...”

“Sir the time for this is not now. The pirates are about to throw hooks as we speak,” Tao interrupts the captain.

As I see the first hook land on the deck; I take the last sword, the damned gladius of fucking course, and I jump up on the railing. On the other ship there are about ten people working the rigging, a few people running around getting everything ready, and I would say thirty or forty rough but healthy looking men armed and ready to board. Now, I've been shot at, stabbed, actually shot several times, and even ploughed by a fucking truck, but holy shit, I have never seen so many barrels pointing at me. Pistols, muskets, crossbows, and not one, but two swivel cannons.

Trying to keep my voice steady, “You're going a little overboard for one single man like me, don't you think?”

An average sized European, with an immaculate red frock coat, steps forward. He also has a beautiful basket handled sword in his left hand and a wheelock pistol in the other. “Well surely you know upstanding gentlemen, such as ourselves, cannot be too careful. Not only our livelihood, but our lives and reputation count on it. Why, people of our profession have seen a sharp uptick of men throwing themselves aboard and blowing themselves up these last two months. Why might you be seeking out conversation with our humble crew on the eve of battle?”

His voice is incredibly smooth and warm. The feeling it imparts is almost like when someone you're in love with comes up from behind you and wraps their arms around you unexpectedly. It actually calms the pit of nervous excitement growing inside my stomach, which completely throws me off guard. Part of me wants to shake this man's hand and have an endless conversation over a glass of wine.

I cock my head to the side, “Can I ask who I am speaking with?”

“My name is Captain Zijde and...” the captain shouts. Even with voice raised it is amazing. I seriously cannot get over this, this man puts the British guy that does all the nature documentaries to shame. Hell, he even makes fucking Morgan Freeman sound 'meh'.

“Sorry Captain, I must cut you short for time is pressed.” Did I just take on his dialect? “I was wondering if your pirate crew is looking to take on any well-qualified men?”

“I certainly wouldn't turn away any young man that would contribute to the good of my crew. Are you qualified?”

“I'd love for you to climb your rigging and see for yourself. Just please don't board until I am calm enough to talk.” Shit, I am doing his dialect again.