Alena

Two weeks had passed since I last saw Matteo. I had expected to be miserable and suffer but the days passed by like a blur, I almost didn't realise it passing by. I missed him deeply. I just stopped thinking about it too much because I wanted to ignore my own pain. It was a regular routine for me to stay in my room and waited for Mama to spend her days with me. I couldn't be bothered to go downstairs if Papa or Alexei was home, it was better for me to stay upstairs because I knew, if I saw them, they were bound to say useless things. A few days ago, I heard Papa arguing with his lawyer about my divorce,

They were saying something about Matteo never picking up their calls and never returning back the letters they sent. It brought a smile to my face, knowing they were never going to ruin our marriage that easily-Matteo had promised to find a solution.

Even though we couldn't see each other, we were able to talk. I borrowed Mama's phone to call Matteo and that was the only solution for us, the only way we could keep our sanity. I could see his face through our video calls and was happy to see him doing better, at least he was eating and sleeping well. We were using our separation as a time to heal, to become the better version of ourselves.

I stayed still as I stared out the window, enjoying the view. It had been raining for the past few days so I didn't have the opportunity to enjoy the sun except for today, it was better than to stare at the ceiling for hours.

A knock was heard on the door which caused me to turn around, seeing Papa standing there.

I had expected my annoying brother to come and stop by but unfortunately, it was my own father. I couldn't be bothered to look at him so I just decided to ignore his presence by continuing to stare out the window. If I didn't let n in, he was going to come in anyway. "Can I come in?" He asked, still standing by the door.

It wasn't even fully closed to begin with. Mama had left it slightly opened when she went out to make lunch and I didn't expect Papa to come by my room-he never did ever since I was here. "Sure," I replied.

He stepped inside my room, leaving the door the way it was.

We both looked at each other for a few seconds until I decided to break the silence, "Why are you here? Do you something?"

"Just to check up on you. I heard you got your cast open," he pointed at my arm.

need

His personal doctor came to check up on me a couple of days ago and decided I could use my arm again. However, I needed to spend the next few months doing physiotherapy. As long as I was getting better, I didn't mind spending the next few months recovering. I nodded, not wanting to say anything..

Papa and I were close when I was younger, especially before I went to medical school. Maybe because I didn't rebel yet at that time and he thought he had a high chance to control my life. After I moved out to further my studies, we grew apart and we never had the chance to build up our father and daughter relationship.

It was awkward to have a conversation with him. It used to be fine until he decided to point a gun at Matteo's head-howBelonging to .

could it even be a solution for him?

"How are you doing?" He asked, tucking his hands inside his slacks' pockets.

"What kind of answer do you want? I have two,"

"Alena..."

"Seriously, Papa. Just cut it off."

He shook his head before clenching his jaw, "We don't have to be like this. I genuinely want to know how you're doing and we don't have to be sarcastic towards each other," "What do you expect? You've ruined my life." I scoffed, somehow feeling as if all of this was a big joke for him.

"I'm doing all of this to protect you!"

"Protect me? What kind of protection? The irony when it comes from you. You and Alexei have been feeding me with all of this protection bullshit. I don't want to be a part of this." I responded, taking a few steps back from him-he hadn't made any movement to lessen the distance between us but I didn't know where else to go.

Papa loved his family. He loved Mama, he loved Alexei, he loved Ana and he loved me. I knew deep down in his heart, he wanted us to be safe. He meant no harm when he said he wanted to protect us but I couldn't easily accept the fact it had gotten too far. "Your husband is not a good man, Alena. He has a lot of enemies and if anything triggers them, they'd come after you They'd come after you because they know, you're his weakness. He'd lose his mind if he loses you." Papa said before he sat down at the edge of my bed while I stood still at my spot.

If I took a closer look at Papa, I could see he was tired. The dark circles under his eyes were visible, as if he hadn't slept properly for the past few days-he looked miserable, just like how Matteo did when I was gone.

"You're not a good man either. You have enemies, too."

"I know. Sometimes I wonder how men like us deserve women like you in our lives,"

I kept quiet, not knowing what else to say. It was better to let him continue.

"As a man like me, as a sinner and as a killer, you wouldn't believe it when I tell you that I'm blessed with a beautiful family. Meeting your Mama was the best thing that happened in my life. Then, she gave birth to three beautiful babies, who's all grown up now. I had expected my life to be a tragedy, Alena. I didn't expect this." He added, his eyes piercing into mine.

"You have your happiness with you. Why can't I have mine?"

"What kind of father do you think I am? I want you to be happy more than anything, Alena but for people like us, we can't just be happy with the decisions we make. Sometimes, we have to make sacrifices to get that happiness. We don't have the free will to always choose."

"I never asked for any of this..."

"You never did. None of you did."

Tears were beginning to form in my eyes as I took a few steps back, trying to get ahold of myself. As I looked up at Papa, I could see the first man I loved; someone who had raised me, who had protected me and loved me. I could never hate him, depsite the things he did.

Mama was standing by the door, a hand on her chest as she held back her tears.

Apparently, she had been standing there for the past few minutes. She was listening to our conversation but she didn't want

to interrupt,

"I love him. Papa" I muttered, looking at my father.

He nodded, "I know you do."

"I don't want to marry Viktor. I don't want you to choose things for me anymore.

Papa stood up before making his way towards me. When he was close enough, he reached out to hold my arms slowly, "Matteo has a lot of enemies. One of them was the one who kidnapped you. We've been trying to find him but we haven't gotten any luck yet," "We?"

"Your brother and I. We've been looking everywhere for him."

I frowned, "What does he want?"

"We don't know. He could be seeking for revenge or anything else but I'm sure Matteo doesn't know, either. He replied, sighing deeply before he continued, "As long as you're seen with Matteo, you could be a target for any other enemies. I can't risk that." I took another step back and Papa let go of my arm, "Matteo can handle that."

"You don't understand, Alena. He has been trying to look for him, too."

"And he'll find him."

"I know he will. Until then, you're not safe with him."

I groaned, "I'm not safe with anyone, Papa. Not with him. Not with you!"

"You were never hurt when I took care of you, Alena. The moment you married him, his crazy ex-wife went after you then you were kidnapped. He brought his dangers into your life and you're too blind to see that!"

"It doesn't matter. I'm starting work soon and you can't keep me here forever,"

"My chauffeur will drop and pick you up."

"What?" I asked, completely in disbelief. "You can't do that to mer

As I stared at my father, I tried to find a glimpse of a lie. However, he meant it when he said those words. My heart was beating fast as I tried to grab onto something to hold, to bring me back to reality, as if I was trapped all along. "That's all you get, Alena."

and

The words escaped his lips before he walked out of my room, leaving me to cry out. Mama ran up to me before wrapping her arms around me, pulling me into a hug. I was sitting on the floor with tears flowing down my cheeks as if I had lost everything in my life. I spent hours crying and it had left me with a throbbing headache.

While Mama tried to comfort me, it didn't help me at all.

This time, I was drowned deeply in my own thoughts.