Frances wiped her brow and smiled at the feast before her. A feast she’d made with just a little bit of assistance from the cooks, and a bemused Martin.

The knight studied the stone bowl and its contents of vegetables, rice, meat and a sunny-side-up egg. “What are these dishes, Frances?”

“That’s bibimbap, and that’s kimchi, two dishes from Elizabeth’s country of origin in the Otherworld. I unfortunately only know these two dishes, but hopefully, they’ll cheer Elizabeth up.”

“They smell delicious.” The pair put the dishes on a tray and carried them to the dining room.

Elizabeth had been avoiding them, but she still ate lunch in the dining room at the same time, like clockwork and hadn’t tried to escape them there. She’d just make small talk, or respond to simple questions.

She’d sat down Martin and Frances appeared, trays in hand. The Otherworlder frowned, “What’s this?”

“We know you’re having a hard time Elizabeth, so we made you these.” Frances put the trays down in front of her friend, smiling.

Her smile immediately faded, when she realized Elizabeth had gone completely still. She was staring at the dishes, hands flat against the table.

Martin took a step back. “Elizabeth?”

The Korean girl buried her face in her hands. “Go away. Just… go away.”

Frances backed away, too shocked to cry. Elizabeth loved Korean food and she liked Frances’s cooking. Except now, she was sobbing into her hands, escaping tears hitting the hot stone bowl and sizzling.

She wanted to hug her friend, but Martin’s hand on her shoulder held her back. Sighing, she didn’t struggle as he guided her away.

“What happened? Why did she burst into tears?” Frances asked the moment they were out of earshot.

“I’m not sure. I know she’s hurting, though. Maybe the food reminded her of how homesick she is?” Martin asked.

Frances groaned. “I should have known. I just thought it’d make her feel safe and loved.”

“I think it does, Frances, but maybe that’s why it hurts.” Martin sighed as Frances looked up at him. “It’s confusing I know. But you remember when you thought you didn’t deserve love and care.”

She did, and the all-too clear memories of that time made her wince. Even now, she sometimes still had to remind herself that she deserved to be happy.

“Yeah, she still blames herself for our soldiers’ deaths.” Crossing her arms, Frances tried to think of a solution. The problem was that what had helped her wouldn’t help Elizabeth.

“It’s only been two days, Frances. She needs more time,” Martin added.

“We don’t have a lot of time, though. We only have a week.” She started walking. “Martin, I want to introduce you to someone. She might have a suggestion.”

----------------------------------------

“Ah, Frances. How are you today?”

Frances smiled as she sat across from Renia. The harpy was seated in her own office in one of the Windwhistler mansion’s guest rooms, neatly shuffling a stack of papers with the tips of her wings. The harpy had got to work immediately and had already talked to several of the Lightning Battalion’s soldiers.

“Good morning, Renia. I’m well. I’d like to introduce you to my friend, Martin.”

“Glad to meet you.” Martin bowed, grinning at Frances’s surprise. “Ginger told me about her last night. She said you really helped her. Thank you.”

“It was my pleasure. She’s a darling. You both are very lucky to have one another.” The harpy folded her wings. “So, what happened?”

Frances nodded. “We were cooking Elizabeth some food from her home, but it didn’t work. She burst into tears.” Frances steepled her fingers. “It’s like nothing seems to make her happy.”

Renia frowned. “Hmm, it seems to me that she’s not looking for comfort.”

“Is it because she feels guilty for the deaths in the Lightning Battalion?” Martin pursed his lips. “Ever since we escaped from the Greensands beach, she’s not been the same.”

“Most probably, and in the aftermath of the recent battle, the guilt she feels has only increased. Simply trying to comfort her may not be enough.”

Something about how the harpy sounded made Frances feel distinctly unwell.

“Renia, what can we do then?”

The harpy leaned forward, resting her wings on her desk. “You might have to confront her. If I understand what happened correctly, she didn’t cause those soldiers' deaths. However, she feels like she is responsible regardless and it’s affecting her judgement.”

Martin winced. “Would confronting her change her mind, though? I mean, just telling her she’s not at fault won’t mean anything if she doesn’t listen to us.”

Renia nodded. “You are right, it may not. However, Elizabeth’s patterns of behaviour are only reinforcing her condition. She’s isolating herself and refusing to spend time with the people that support her. In a sense, she’s trying to punish herself. This is similar to what Ayax is doing too.” The harpy pointed a wing at Frances. “While I agree that you need to be understanding of Elizabeth and Ayax, and be aware of their wishes, they can’t hide away from the world forever. More importantly, they’re behaving in a way that will deprive them of support that they need.”

Frances felt that sick, twisting feeling grow in her stomach. “But Renia, Elizabeth is my best friend, and Ayax is family. I… I can’t force them to do something they don’t want to.”

“And you normally should not, Frances, but are Elizabeth and Ayax acting normally right now?”

Renia’s question, phrased so quietly, echoed in Frances’s mind as she and Martin left the hospital and hurried along through the rain. It was pouring ceaselessly and Frances could hear the low rumble of distant thunder.

“I think she’s right,” Martin said as they entered the mansions and wiped their boots on the mat. “I think we’re going to have to use some force.”

“I think you may be right. I just don’t want to do it.” Frances exhaled and pinched the bridge of her nose as they walked down the corridor. “Let’s try Ayax first. Elizabeth is probably in an even worse mood because of the food. Do you know where she is, though? I can’t seem to find her anywhere.”

“Hey, cuz.”

Frances and Martin started, spinning around to find Ayax in a heavy raincoat, staff in hand. The emotions on her face were utterly unreadable. Only the telltale bags underneath her eyes suggested the troll’s emotional turmoil.

“Ayax! We’ve been looking for you,” said Martin.

“Oh. I see.” Ayax coughed and avoided Martin’s eyes. “How Ginger?”

Martin managed a smile. “She’s doing well. She told me to tell you that she doesn’t think it’s your fault that she got hurt. She just acted faster.”

“That’s… good.” Ayax brushed back her hair with her hand and swallowed. “Cuz, you remember our talk about casting your Lightning Spell, and how you took inspiration from when you were watching thunderstorms?”

“Yes. Oh, you want to watch a thunderstorm?” Frances asked.

The troll winced. “Well, yes, but not quite.”

The answer made no sense, and Frances narrowed her eyes as she tried to figure out what her cousin wanted. She wasn’t being very forthcoming about it as Ayax was not even meeting her gaze.

And suddenly, as she heard the rumbling of thunder, it clicked.

“You’re not serious.” Frances stepped forward, her hand inching towards Ivy’s Sting. “You want to practice, no—you want to attempt to learn the spell during a thunderstorm so you can come up with an aria that will work for you? I told you that casting this spell incorrectly during a thunderstorm is dangerous!”

Martin’s jaw nearly dropped open. “Wait, what?”

Ayax swallowed, and finally met her cousin’s eyes. “Yes. It’s the best way. You remember that when I tried the spell with your aria it didn’t work.”

Frances remembered. On the days that they’d not seen combat, she’d been practicing magic with Ayax and had focused on trying to teach her cousin her lightning spell. Nothing seemed to work, however. For whatever reason, although Ayax understood how real lightning was created. There was a missing component to either Ayax’s singing or her visualization.

“And what does that have to do with you trying the spell in a thunderstorm?”

Frances had no idea how she looked, but it must have been something because Ayax took a step back, her eyes wide. Still, she held her chin up.

“I need to come up with my own aria for the spell, and what better way than to try to do it in an actual thunderstorm? That way, I can be inspired by the sight of real lightning and the sound of the storm—”

“No.”

“Cuz! Please! You said you would teach me.” The troll reached forward, but Frances twisted her arm, deflecting Ayax’s hand.

The narrative has been taken without permission. Report any sightings.

Frances had no words. No, rather, words struggled to even describe the intensity of the fury and hurt that burned in the back of her throat and stung her eyes.

“I did and right now, I have never regretted anything more in my life.”

Ayax’s eyes widened and immediately filled with tears. Wiping them with the back of her hand, she sighed. “Fine. I’ll do it myself.” She turned around.

Out came Ivy’s Sting and Frances hissed, “If you walk out that door I will bind you and drag you to your parents.”

Ayax whirled around. “You can’t do that!”

Frances fell into a duelling stance, raising her wand, whilst focusing on her diamond ring to activate its power. “Martin, get Elizabeth, and an adult, preferably Dom, yesterday!”

Reliable as always, Martin tore down the corridor without another word.

Ayax stared at his back before glaring at her cousin. “Frances, I need to get stronger. I’m doing it to protect you, Elizabeth, Martin and Ginger! Our friends and family!”

“By trying to kill yourself?

“We put our lives at risk all the time in this war!”

“Only to protect what we love. You want to put yourself in harm’s way for a chance of getting stronger!”

“What choice do I have?”

“You could look at different spells, you could just watch the thunderstorm in the safety of a house, you could decide to be a healer-mage instead of a combat mage so you can save more lives.” Frances lowered her wand slightly as Ayax spluttered helplessly, but kept herself tensed.

Suddenly, the troll fell silent, her head bowed. She brought her staff up and held it in both hands.

“Frances, I’m sorry. I won’t lose another loved one. I don’t want to hurt you, Frances, but I need to learn the spell.”

“Ayax you’re being—” Frances raised her voice into song, blocking the gray-colored bolt of magic that Ayax sent her way, and the troll was on her. Her staff was hammering into her white shield.

The situation was so insane Frances wondered if she was in some crazy nightmare. It felt like some absurd deja vu and brought Frances back to when she’d left for Vertingen because she’d thought that would be helping Edana.

Something about that recollection pricked at her like she was missing something, but Frances didn’t have the time to reflect. She dodged a wild swing and tried to pin Ayax by ripping the curtains from the nearby windows and sending them at her cousin. The troll beat one curtain way, but another wrapped around the end of her staff and ripped it out of her hands.

Frances lowered her wand and breathed out. “Alright, Ayax, can we just sit down and talk? We can—”

Ayax lunged at her. Frances stepped back, but she was too slow. The troll had a hand around her wrist and was wrenching it. Pain shot up her arm and gasping, Frances let go of Ivy’s Sting. It was only thanks to the training she did with Martin earlier that day that allowed her to dodge Ayax’s punch to her face. Pushing one hand into her cousins’ nose, Frances kicked Ayax’s knee, making the troll release her with a gasp.

She’d lost her wand, though. Ayax turned to grab her staff, but Frances leapt for the troll’s tail. Her hands slid a bit down the furry appendage, but she managed to latch her fingernails on and Ayax yelped, losing balance and landing on her butt.

The moment of triumph was brief because Ayax was lunging at her. Frances was slammed into the ground, and suddenly she was grappling with her cousin. She tried to move, but Ayax was straddling her waist. Ayax’s fingers were clamped around her arms. The troll’s wild eyes were filled with tears.

Frances opened her mouth to scream out a note, trying to throw Ayax off of her, all thoughts of holding back gone. Her cousin let go of one of her arms and clamped her hand over her mouth. Frances tried to wrench the suffocating grasp off of her, but the troll’s grip was iron.

“I’m sorry. I’m sorry!” Ayax sobbed.

Frances didn’t want to cry, but she had tears in her eyes as well. She didn’t want to see her cousin like this. See Ayax desperate and lost to the point that they were fighting each other.

Two pairs of arms grabbed Ayax around her shoulders and hauled her off of Frances. Frances gasped, heaving-in breaths, and staggered to her feet.

Elizabeth and Martin were holding onto Ayax. She wasn’t resisting. Rather, it looked more like the pair was holding Ayax up.

Elizabeth turned to Frances, eyes wide. “What the hell happened?”

Frances sighed. “Let’s go to Ginger’s room, I’ll explain.”

----------------------------------------

After reassuring the adults who’d heard the commotion, the group trudged out of the mansion, into the field hospital.

Frances opened the curtain to Ginger’s room, hoping she was still awake. She found the redhead experimentally pacing around the room.

“Hey, Frances. Woah, what happened?”

“Ayax tried to do lightning in this storm. I tried to stop her. I almost failed. Do you mind if we talk, like, all of us?”

Ginger’s jaw dropped open, but quickly closed it and nodded.

There weren’t enough chairs in the room, so everybody, except for Ginger, sat on the floor in a circle, with Ginger on the bed.

Once she was comfortable, Frances locked eyes with her cousin. “Ayax, I forgive you for attacking me, but this—your obsession over trying to protect people has to stop.”

The troll winced. “But I need to get better, or else I’ll fail again. I already failed to protect my parents.”

Frances took a deep breath and crossed her arms. “Ayax, your parents’ deaths were not your fault.”

“Don’t say that.”

Frances swallowed. Ayax’s fists were clenched tight, her tail had straightened like a lance. “I’m sorry, but it’s the truth.”

The troll glared at Frances. Black eyes filled with tears. “I told you not to say that!”

“You could have hurt yourself going out there today because you keep feeling responsible for what happened to Ginger. You nearly hurt me!” Frances swallowed. She didn’t want to say what she had to say next, but she felt she had to. Her cousin’s fear had driven her too far. “I can’t lie to you anymore, Ayax. Your parents’ deaths were not your fault and never have been! They happened because this world can be cruel and because your father chose to take revenge!”

“Shut up!” Ayax screamed, clamping her hands over her years. “My father was a brave, loving troll. He… he… he made a mistake, that’s all. It was still my fault they died!”

“Ayax, weren’t you thirteen, a child?” Elizabeth asked suddenly, her voice quiet.

“So what?”

Elizabeth shuffled over to where Ayax sat, reaching out with a hand. The troll backed away, and so Elizabeth stopped. “It’s just, do you think your parents would blame you?”

Ayax shook her head. “What they think… what they would have thought, is irrelevant. I could have saved them.”

Ginger coughed, her brow furrowed. “How? Did you know the spell to heal your mother and chose not to use it?”

“No—”

“Did you stab your father?” Ginger asked.

“Of course not!”

“So how could it be your fault? Look, Ayax, I… your words did encourage me to try to help you, but I made that decision. I acted. It’s on me, not you.” Ginger sighed. “And besides, you were right, I’m working through things and I needed help. You made me realize I did.”

Ayax stared at Ginger, then Elizabeth, Martin, and then finally to Frances.

Her ears drooping down, Ayax hiccuped, swallowed, and burst into fresh sobs. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry, cuz. I know you’re mad. You can kick me out and—”

Frances shuffled to Ayax’s side and hugged her cousin. “No. You’re staying with us. We are not leaving you until you get better.”

Elizabeth added her embrace to the pile. “Yeah, and if you feel you need punishing, I heard we have a counsellor now. You can think of seeing her as a punishment.”

Martin and Ginger joined the group hug, and they held the crying troll until her tears dried up and she was only sniffling.

The group uncurled, sliding back into a small circle. Ginger, now sitting on the floor, using Martin’s shoulder to rest her head.

“I’m sorry. I… I can’t believe I attacked you.” Ayax winced. “Thank you.”

Frances, remembering why this seemed familiar, smiled softly. “Don’t worry Ayax, I… did I ever tell you about the time I ran away from Edana to join a campaign at fourteen years old because I thought I was a burden to her?”

“Oh, right.” Ayax groaned and turned to Martin and Ginger. “Ginger, I’m sorry. I was wrong.”

The redhead snorted. “Kid, you were right. A little on the nose, but you were right.”

Ayax sighed. “I still feel like an idiot.”

“You’re going to feel like that for a bit.” Frances turned to Elizabeth and pursed her lips. “By the way… Elizabeth, I’m sorry about this morning.”

“There’s nothing to forgive. I finished everything. I just…” Elizabeth swallowed. “I still blame myself for what happened on the beach, and all the deaths we had. I know it’s not only my fault. I know this is war, but… I can’t help second-guessing myself.”

“Is there anything we can do to help?” Martin asked.

“Just… bear with me, please. I’m not sure what will help.” Elizabeth chuckled and shook her head. “Maybe you could drag me out when I’m trying to lock myself in my room.”

“We could do that. If it will help you feel better,” said Frances.

Elizabeth nodded slowly. “Yeah. That’ll be nice. I’m going to talk to Renia too. How did you find her Frances?”

“Um, to make a long story short, I met her at a House of Light and I found her again when I realized we all might need someone to talk to.” Frances frowned. “How did you find out about her?”

“I was talking to some of our soldiers. They absolutely adore her. Thank you for hiring her, and for taking care of things while I was being… stupid.” Elizabeth sighed, glancing at Ginger. “How did you do it, Ginger? You were a battalion commander before.”

“You muddle along until you find something that works,” Ginger grunted as she sat up against the bed. “You’re doing fine and with time, you’ll get better. And if you get stupid, we’ll knock it out of you.”

“Gently,” said Martin, smiling. “But we’re glad you’re feeling better, Elizabeth.”

“Thank you.” Elizabeth raised her arms. “Group hug?”

They all burrowed into each other in a tangle of arms, laughing as they did so.

----------------------------------------

“Frances, do you mind sleeping over tonight?” Elizabeth asked after they left Ginger and Martin in their hospital room.

“I’d love to come over,” said Frances.

“Can I join too? Please?” Ayax asked, not looking at either of them.

Frances stiffened slightly, but the troll looked so forlorn with her tail almost dragging on the floor that she sighed. “I don’t mind. Elizabeth?”

Her friend smiled. “The more the merrier.”

----------------------------------------

Unlike most of their sleepovers, this one was quiet. Perhaps everybody was too tired, perhaps they’d talked too much that day, but when the day ended. The three girls gathered in the room, said their goodnights and chatted for a bit. After they joined Elizabeth in prayer to their own respective deities, they fell asleep.

Except, Ayax hadn’t fallen asleep. When she was sure Frances and Elizabeth were dead to the world, she opened her eyes and sat up in her bed. The three girls had moved their beds together, with Frances’s in the centre, Elizabeth and Ayax on the sides.

The troll stared at her cousin’s sleeping form, arms wrapped contentedly around a spare pillow. It was probably the cutest thing in the world, and yet, Ayax almost sniffled at the shame that cut through her.

“Can’t sleep?”

Ayax jumped and saw that Elizabeth’s eyes were open. The Otherworlder pulled herself upright and slowly walked over to Ayax’s bed, taking a seat on the end.

“No. Sorry—”

“You didn’t wake me up. I couldn’t sleep either.” Elizabeth sighed and glanced at Frances. “It’s strange. One year ago I was helping Frances keep it together and now she’s the one helping us.”

Ayax nodded. “She’s a lot stronger than she knows.”

“Mmhmm.” Elizabeth slowly pulled Frances’s blanket over her. “Ayax, I know we just talked about how important it is for us not to do anything stupid and take care of ourselves, but I think we both know who we need to protect at all costs.”

Ayax nodded, meeting Elizabeth’s eyes. “We cannot let her go back to her parents. They—they don’t deserve to even see another hair on her head.”

Elizabeth brushed a lock of her hair behind her ear. “Do you know she’s why I decided that I can’t keep blaming myself?”

The troll frowned. “What do you mean?”

“After she made the food, I was really torn up. I was happy and sad, and ashamed. I needed to talk, so I talked to the soldiers. They were glad to see me and they told me about how Frances has been handling things in my absence. She was making sure they were barracked, well-fed, and even got a counsellor for them. After all that, even though we were all hurt by the battle, she kept doing what was right.” Elizabeth smiled at Ayax. “Frances says that she relies on me more, but in truth, I think we all rely on each other. If we listen and comfort her, she’s the one who keeps us moving forward.”

Ayax nodded slowly and reached out to take Elizabeth’s hand. “The one we anchor ourselves to. The one who keeps us focused on what’s important and what’s right.” The pair looked over the small girl, still sleeping, mouth having now dropped open.

“She’s going to drool,” Ayax said.

“Oh, dear.” Elizabeth giggled softly and leaned closer to Ayax. “You know she might be upset at you for a while.”

“I know. I deserve it, though.” Ayax took a deep breath and met Elizabeth’s eye. “Liz, is it a little crazy that we as a group feel so strongly for each other? That we’d do everything we can to protect each other?”

“No, you’re right. It is crazy and strange. I think it’s even a little dangerous.” Elizabeth squeezed Ayax’s hand as the troll averted her eyes. “It’s not just you, it’s me, Frances, Martin, and now Ginger. We’ve all thrown our lives into the path of danger just to protect each other. I know that isn’t normal, and maybe it isn’t right, but it might be the only thing that might get us out of this war. We just need to do so as carefully as we can.”

Ayax snorted, “And not walk into a thunderstorm to try to learn how to channel lightning.”

“Indeed.” Elizabeth hesitated, but leaned forward, and hugged the troll. “Good night, Ayax.”

Ayax, tail straight as a pole, nodded numbly. “Good night. Thank you, Liz.”

Elizabeth slid off the bed and smiled. It was once again, the bright, sunny smile that Ayax had fallen in love with.