Stelle was staring into the eyes of the most despicable person in the universe, she was sure of it.
She sighed and looked away from her own face, reflected in the shiny window of a fancy café. Firefly's voice still echoed in her head, filled with all the suffering she had endured during her time as a member of the Iron Cavalry. And Stelle was about to trample on all that pain. Not only that, but she was going to do it in secret.
I'm such a hypocrite.
Stelle remembered the tears her girlfriend had shed at the entrance to the Dreamscape. Back then she had scolded Firefly for keeping her identity a secret, and now she was about to do something much worse. She was going to go back on her word. Stelle was going to enter that café and meet with Ruan Mei, the person Firefly would never have asked for help from. She would have begged the elegant scholar to give her something, even just a hint, to set her on the right path to save the person she loved.
Stelle just couldn't go on like this.
It was ironic, but ever since she had left Penacony, she hadn't been able to get a good night's sleep. Her dreams were plagued by visions of multi-eyed creatures chasing a silver-haired beauty. Stelle always tried her best to protect her, but she always ended up disappearing into a myriad of bubbles. It had gotten so bad for Stelle that she had started accepting Himeko's invitations for coffee, just to stay awake longer and not fall back into those nightmares. But of course, the lack of sleep was starting to get to her. Thanks to a concoction Lingsha had given her, the last few days had been better, but she couldn't rely on it forever.
Besides, that was the least of her problems. Stelle would've gladly endured years of insomnia if it meant that Firefly could live a long and healthy life.
"I'm not going to let her disappear on me... not for the fourth time," Stelle muttered, grabbing the handle of the door to the café. But she hesitated to open it.
Normally she would have chalked it up to her rampant social anxiety. But this time was different. After all, she had gotten a little better at dealing with people. And she had Firefly to thank for that.
Having someone tell you they love you does wonders for your confidence... and my girlfriend is super cute too!
But it wasn't just about self-esteem. Being able to spend time with someone so gentle had made Stelle a little more relaxed about hanging out with strangers. Not everyone was out to get her, it seemed.
The issue was another one: Ruan Mei.
To put it simply, she kinda gave Stelle the creeps. And it wasn't because the first thing that woman had done during their first meeting was to drug her. No, she just found her extremely hard to deal with.
In the little time Stelle had memory of, she had met plenty of villains. And Stelle had fought against them without no issue. That’s because they were wrong, or at least her profound sense of justice told her so.
Destroying a planet to create a new world, imprisoning everyone in a dream realm… Stelle had been able to thwart those plans and oppose the sentiments that originated them. They were after all coming from pure, but flawed, human desires. The love for one's homeland corrupted by a Stellaron. A misguised sense of righteousness and compassion. Or, why not, just a good ol' crave for power or money.
Stelle could easily understand those feelings and so deny them.
But in the case of Ruan Mei was different. She was no villain. Stelle had not sensed an ounce of malice in her calm turquoise eyes. She also had none but one desire. To get to the bottom of her research: finding the origin of life. To find an answer to that question, Stelle was sure Ruan Mei would've done anything, with no qualms for morality or feelings. Because she had no need for them. It was almost like she incarnated science itself, logical and rational to the extreme.
No wonder Nous got an interest in her…
So, when Firefly's usually soft voice had declared so vehemently that she didn't want to have anything to do with Ruan Mei, Stelle hadn't objected.
She knew that Ruan Mei hadn't actually intended to revive the Swarm. That much she had understood from the super-complicated logs she had found in the depths of the Herta Space Station.
During her research into life and its origins, Ruan Mei had become fascinated with the idea of Emanators. So, of course, she had tried to create one artificially.
The reason she had chosen Propagation as the Path for her crazy experiment was purely for convenience, not because she had any particular interest in bringing back the old intergalactic disaster. According to the logs, the more primitive Paths, like Propagation, were easier to manipulate.
Ruan Mei also knew that her synthetic Emanator would self-destruct 56 seconds after it was created, and would not go off to destroy the Herta Space Station and ravage the cosmos.
But then... why had Stelle not told these things to Firefly?
Because, even though Ruan Mei hadn't tried to bring back the Swarm, that didn't mean she wouldn't have done so in the future. After all, what was above the Emanators? Aeons. Stelle thought it was only a matter of time before Ruan Mei would try to create one. And if Propagation was the easiest path to work with...
She would definitely revive Tayzzynroth if she has the chance.
Fortunately, the opportunity to resurrect dead Aeons wasn't that common, or at least Stelle hoped it wouldn't be. Sunday had to use a Stellaron for his plan, and they didn't grow on trees.
Although one is about to walk in and sit down at her table...
But it didn't matter. Whatever would have happened in the future, Stelle would have dealt with it. All she wanted was to help Firefly, and she'd even sit down with Nanook if she had to.
That was why she had sent a message to Ruan Mei during her last sleepless night. She knew Firefly would probably have hated her for it, but she couldn't pass up the chance to at least get some information.
I hope you'll forgive me.
With newfound determination, Stelle finally opened the door and entered the café. The inside was as fancy as the exterior. In a well-lit room, numerous elegantly dressed guests were seated at small tables with elaborate designs. They drank from expensive-looking cups while being served pastries that made Stelle's stomach rumble just by looking at them.
She didn't have time to look around for Ruan Mei before a girl clad in a traditional aquamarine Xianzhou dress greeted her.
"Good morning, you must be Miss Stelle, am I right?" she asked, giving her a bright smile.
Her fame was beginning to bear fruit. This girl really was pretty. And the way her dress exposed her thighs... just wonderful. But at that moment Stelle remembered Firefly's sweet words.
"I trust you..."
Stelle sighed. Her womanising days were over. She had chosen to devote herself to the most beautiful being in existence.
I wonder if she'd wear a dress like this if I asked her.
Using this mental image as a shield against earthly desires, Stelle bowed and apologised:
"I'm very sorry, but I can't hang out with you right now."
The clerk looked at her with polite confusion:
"Um, I'm sorry? Miss Ruan Mei told me she was waiting for a girl with grey hair and golden eyes..."
So this is how she hides her heartache... understandable.
Stelle nodded and decided not to say anything that would make the poor girl understand that she'd figured her out.
"It's me, please show me to her table."
Ruan Mei was certainly a VIP patron for this particular estalishment, as the young employee guided Stelle towards the back of the cafè and through a small door. The ambient they entered was even more lavish than the previous one. It was a ample circular room, lit by the morning sun through a serie of huge windows that opened up on a traditional garden, with a beautiful fountain, from which water flow camly, filling the air with the relaxing sound of its flow.
At the center was a single table, at which was seated a woman with brown hair with turquoise streaks, loosely tied with a DNA shaped hairpin. On her slender neck was a chain of pearls, matching with her earrings. As Stelle approached, her light eyes rose up from the cup of tea she was enjoying and her rosy lips curled into a faint smile.
"It’s being a while. So you still remember me," she stated as a matter of fact.
"I do. Thanks for seeing me with so little notice," Stelle replied, even though Ruan Mei's wasn't a question.
"Please sit down with me, I’ve ordered something you’ll surely like," Ruan Mei invited her, gesturing for the chair in front of hers.
That scholar must't have had something like an alluring aura around herself, as Stelle had not even noticed the bounty that was on that table. It seemed that Ruan Mei had ordered at least two or three cake sets, complemented by two cup filled with exquisite looking tea. After thanking the employee who had showed her the way, Stelle sat down, her eyes sparkling with desire.
"Don’t worry, no Anti-Truth Serum this time. Please eat to your heart's content."
If she was trying to joke around, it didn't sound like it. Ruan Mei had spoken as if she expected Stelle to really think she was going to drug her again.
"Are you sure? These look expensive! I 'on't 'ant 'o 'ake 'dvantage 'f 'our 'indness.'"
"I think you should say that before you start eating."
After swallowing the huge piece of delicious cake she had put in her mouth and taking a sip of the sweet amber nectar, Stelle coughed and said:
"As I said, I am sorry to ask you to meet me on such short notice. I'm sure you're very busy."
She was certain that the reason Ruan Mei was on the Xianzhou wasn't a leisure trip.
The scientist made a dismissive gesture with her hand:
"I've been called to advise the Generals on some important matter. But they can wait."
Stelle's eyes opened wide:
"Are you making Jin Yuan and Feixiao wait to meet with me?" she asked dumbfounded.
She felt both flattered and nervous. Ruan Mei was looking her straight in the eye and she couldn't help but feel that this woman wanted nothing more than to open her head and take a look inside.
"I just find you much more interesting than them," Ruan Mei calmly explained to Stelle's bewilderment.
So it seemed that her charm was enough to make even this extremely rational scientist fall for her. Or maybe it was just rational to fall for a heroic figure like the Galactic Baseballer. Ruan Mei was certainly beautiful. She had curves in all the right places, long legs, and her skin was smooth as silk. Her eyes were deep, but clear as a dewdrop. But still, Stelle couldn't see anything in them that came close to the kindness of the girl she loved.
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Aeons, why must you tempt me today?
"I'm sorry Miss Ruan Mei, I'm very happy that you like me, but I'm already taken."
If the woman was shocked, she hid it well. Her face, seraphic as always, turned to her plate. She cut a small piece of cake and raised it to her lips.
"I think you have misunderstood me, Stelle. I have no interest in your outward features, though they are quite pleasing to the eye," she stated politely, "what intrigues me is what you have on the inside."
Stelle's mood took an instant nosedive. It didn't take a genius like her to understand that Ruan Mei wasn't talking about her personality. Stelle didn't like it at all when people drew attention to the Stellaron she carried. It made her feel like she was less of a person. Even though he had apologised, the way Aventurine had treated her like a ticking time bomb during the Penacony crisis still hurt deeply.
Is this how Firefly felt about SAM?
As time went on, she felt worse and worse about blaming her girlfriend for hiding her true identity.
"My Stellaron is off limits," she declared dryly.
Ruan Mei didn't seem to mind her harsh tone. On the contrary, her mouth curved into a rare smile.
"It is true that communication between humans is one of the hardest sciences. I'm sorry if I offended you. It's true that I'm interested in your Stellaron, but not for the reason you think. The Cancers of All Worlds have appeared many times in history. But this is the first time we've seen one coexist with a human. You are a very peculiar life form, Stelle."
So she sees me as a walking scientific oddity.
Stelle didn't know if that was better or worse than her previous assumption.
"I don't know if I should take that as a compliment."
"You can take it however you like. I just find it hard to predict how your life will go. Will you be taken over by it, or would you be the one to change the Stellaron inside you?" Ruan Mei asked as she added two cubes of sugar to her tea, speaking as if she were talking about the weather.
These questions were far too loaded for Stelle to answer. As much as it would have been interesting to talk to Ruan Mei about her particular state of being, she had something more pressing on her mind. So she decided to skip the pleasantries and go straight to the reason why she was there, taking part in this strange tea party.
"Ruan Mei... Entropy Loss Syndrome, have you ever heard of it?"
As the words left her lips, she realised that they were exactly the same as the ones Firefly had spoken on the rooftop. Even now, when a month had passed, she was still not over that moment. At the edge of the Dream she had rekindled a bond she didn't even know she had, and at the same time she had found out that she would have lost it again, this time forever. In a way, it was both the happiest and saddest memory she had collected in her new short life.
Ruan Mei answered quickly, almost as if she were reading from a textbook:
"A chronic dissociation from reality that slowly breaks down the body structure of the afflicted person. Their motor functions deteriorate and their senses are dulled until their entire being slowly fades away."
Hearing these words spoken in such a cold manner only added to the heartache Stelle was experiencing. Still, a glimmer of hope began to shimmer in her:
"So you know about it... everyone I talked to about it had never heard of it."
Ruan Mei stirred her tea with a spoon before answering:
"I'm not surprised. I would also be ignorant of it if it were not for the experiment you helped me with."
"You mean..."
"While researching how to manipulate the Path of Propagation, I came across the history of the Republic of Glamoth and its Iron Cavalry. Their studies on combining the chitin of Tayzzynroth's spawn with an extremely resistant alloy to create advanced mechanical armors was quite useful in recreating Skaracabaz's body."
Bug bodies definitely weren't what Stelle was interested in.
"What about the pilots of the armors? If you know about ELS, you must also know a lot about them," Stelle asked with trepidation.
"I do. Although it didn't help my experiment, I found the genetic engineering they used to create them fascinating. A normal human couldn't interface with the armor they created. So instead of changing its design, they changed the pilots."
"Changed them, you say..." Stelle's voice quavered.
"Yes. Apart from making them stronger and more perceptive than normal humans, they also used the power of Propagation to make them able to synchronise their nervous system with the armor suits. This resulted in them all looking very similar to each other. A bit like a swarm, you could say. It's truly remarkable how they fought fire with fire. I would have liked to study a specimen, if it hadn't been so difficult to get hold of one."
Difficult... I can see that.
There was only one such 'specimens' and she was quite good at setting things ablaze. Ruan Mei's laboratory would have been reduced to ashes before a single experiment could have been carried out.
Hearing her beautiful girlfriend referred to as a lab rat annoyed Stelle even more than the previous Stellaron conversation. But getting angry with Ruan Mei wouldn't have helped.
She knows about it... now to see if she can help me... if she can, I'll have to convince Firefly.
"Hypothetically... if I could get you to meet with one... would you be able to cure the Entropy Loss Syndrome that afflicts them?" Stelle asked, barely able to contain her nervousness.
Ruan Mei looked at her impassively as usual, seemingly not surprised by Stelle's suggestion that a member of the Iron Cavalry could have survived an incredible amount of time.
"So it's true. The Astral Express has some kind of special relationship with the Stellaron Hunters," she said before taking a sip of tea.
Rumours circulated quickly. Just a few weeks ago, she had to defend herself in front of General Feixiao, and now this. But from what Ruan Mei had said so far, it was obvious that she would think of Sam right away. If the Iron Cavalry's armour could only be operated by special individuals, then it made sense that there was a survivor of Glamoth's downfall inside the Stellaron Hunter Mech.
Stelle would have preferred it hadn't come to this. Firefly's nature as a wanted terrorist would have made most people reluctant to help her. But maybe she could've made a deal. Ruan Mei really didn't seem to be the type to let things like laws get in the way. If Stelle gave her enough of an incentive, there migh have been a chance that she would be willing to help.
Stelle had amassed quite a lot of credits and even owned an airship in the Land of Dreams. But something told her that material things would not be enough to strike a deal with Ruan Mei.
So, throwing caution to the wind, Stelle cried out in a voice full of desperation:
"Please, I just want to save Sam for personal reasons, okay? I'm willing to give you whatever you want if you help me. "
Ruan Mei didn't seem shaken by her pleading:
"Whatever I want, you say? What if I asked for the Stellaron inside you?"
Of course. This was not going to be easy at all.
"I thought you only found it interesting because it's inside me..." Stelle sighed.
But could she do it? Give the Stellaron to Ruan Mei? Maybe she really would have resurrected a dead Aeon with it. But besides, it wasn't as if she could just take it out and give it to her.
Since I can use its powers... that means I'm somehow bound to it.
What if taking it out would have killed her? Would she have died so that Firefly could live? Her heart said a resounding yes. But her mind? If she died, as Firefly had told her, the universe would come to an end. She also couldn't imagine her girlfriend ever being happy if she sacrificed herself. She was just too kind.
Her train of thought was interrupted by a soft chuckle. Stelle's frowned: she never thought she'd hear Ruan Mei laugh.
"The fact that you're seriously considering it is quite intriguing," Ruan Mei said in response to her confused look, "Don't worry, I won't ask for anything like that. As I said, your Stellaron is much more valuable when it's in your body. Anyway, I still owe you for your assistance on the Space Station. In the name of our partnership, I'm willing to help you for free. And I won't ask why a member of the Astral Express would want to save a Stellaron Hunter."
It was too good to be true. Stelle didn't know if her relationship with Ruan Mei could be called a partnership, but... was she really willing to help her without asking for anything in return?
Probably seeing this question on her face, Ruan Mei said:
"As I said, I wanted to study a member of the Iron Cavalry, so you can consider that my payment."
This means...
"You mean you can cure Sam?" Stelle exclaimed and jumped out of her chair.
"No, I can't cure him... wait, don't get so depressed." Ruan Mei quickly added after seeing Stelle's reaction, "I can't heal him because he's not sick. In fact, his body is working exactly as it should."
"But he's dying!" Stelle yelled in dismay.
"As he should. Like the other members of the Cavalry, his genetic code is written to guarantee his death if he is separated from his armor or if enough time has passed. Veteran soldiers are, after all, the first to begin a munity. A measure against rebellion and desertion, that's the nature of Entropy Loss Syndrome. Glamoth was afraid of the power they created, so they put an expiration date on it."
Firefly had mentioned something along these lines, but hearing these terrible facts laid out in such a cold tone caused Stelle's heart to burn with an unbridled rage. She prayed that one day a Path would allow her to go back in time and smash Glamoth's High Command's heads with her bat. But she took a deep breath and regained control. What mattered now was Firefly's health.
"Okay, you can use whatever words you want. Not heal him, but fix him, help him or whatever you can do to make him well!" Stelle exclaimed, red in the face.
"Well, I could just rewrite his genetic code to stop the dissociation process. If I do that, his condition should slowly improve and he should regain most of his normal functions in time."
After the cold shower of Ruan Mei's previous words, for Stelle was like being immersed in a hot, comforting bath. But she didn't want to declare victory yet:
"Ok... what's the catch? There's always a catch, isn't there? You're not going to turn her into some kind of bug-human hybrid that can only say my name, are you?"
Ruan Mei seemed to consider the possibility for a second, but then she shook her head and said:
"Of course not, I don't see anything of value to be gained from such an endeavour. But a catch... I guess you could call it that. As I said, Sam's body functions according to his genetic code. Rewriting his DNA would stop the effects of the Entropy Loss Syndrome, but it could also have some unwanted consequences."
"Consequences... What kind of consequences?" Stelle asked, already dreading the answer.
"Genes are the building blocks of life. As such, major changes to one's DNA structure are bound to shake a human being to the core. If I were to change what makes you who you are, would you be the same person?" Ruan Mei asked, grabbing the only piece of cake left for her.
Stelle was silent for a second.
"Are you saying that... Sam would no longer be Sam?"
"I can't really say. Science consists of hypotheses, experiments and results. In this particular case, I can only give you the first, as I have never worked on an individual with such a condition. It's very possible that removing the genes causing ELS could alter Sam's personality, his ability to use his armor, or even some physical trait."
It was almost as if Stelle had been punched in the gut. It was just the worst. She would have easily accepted Firefly sprouting a pair of wings or even a few extra legs, but for her girlfriend to become another person? It was like she was going to die anyway!
Besides, with how much effort Firefly had put into becoming her own individual self, leaving behind her identity as a weapon, how was Stelle going to tell her to risk changing who she was?
She'll never agree to something like this...
"I can see that this would be a difficult decision to make. My offer of help has no deadline, so feel free to discuss it with the interested party. Should you decide to proceed, you can just send me a message," Ruan Mei broke the silence.
Stelle just nodded. If she had hoped that this encounter would give her some peace of mind, she now knew that it would have the opposite effect. She would lose even more sleep after this.
"There might be another way."
Stelle's head jumped up like a spring at these words:
"Another way? One that won't change Sam?"
"It's just an idea," Ruan Mei said after finishing the last sip of her tea, "instead of removing the condition from his DNA, you could find a way to stop the dissociation itself. Think of it as going after the effect, not the cause."
"Going after the effect?" Stelle repeated, her hopes rekindled a little.
Ruan Mei took her now empty cup and explained:
"Imagine this cup was filled and had a hole in the bottom. The tea would obviously continue to drip out of it. So how would you stop the cup from emptying itself? Of course, you could fix the hole, just as I could fix Sam's genetic code. But there's another possibility..."
Stelle could hear the gears of her brain turning:
"You could... add more tea!"
Ruan Mei seemed pleased with her answer.
"Exactly. For example, the Long-Life Curse, Mara could probably counteract the effect of ELS. Of course, I doubt you would want to go that route..."
Firefly, with Blade as her companion, would certainly never have considered that.
"But could there be better alternatives?" Stelle asked.
"There might be. I can't think of any right now, but I'll get back to you. Perhaps you will come across one on your travels."
"I... really hope so."
At last a new smile appeared on Stelle's face. This silver lining Firefly had mentioned... if Ruan Mei thought it existed, then it really wasn't just an IPC lie.
The elegant scientist stood up and patted her dress to remove some cake crumbs.
"I'm afraid it's time for me to go, Stelle, I really don't want the Cloud Knights to start looking for me. It's been quite interesting talking to you, just as I had hoped."
"Ruan Mei... I really can't thank you enough," Stelle said as she shook her hand.
She felt kind of bad for the thoughts she'd had before coming to the café. This time, Ruan Mei had actually been very nice to her.
"Don't worry about it. I'm glad you enjoyed the cakes as well. I'll make sure to order a special one for the next time we meet. Feel free to contact me if anything comes up," Ruan Mei said, her heels tapping on the floor as she headed for the exit.
As she watched her go, a question popped into Stelle's head.
"Ruan Mei... if you had been on Glamoth back then... would you have created the Iron Cavalry?"
"No."
Her answer was immediate.
Maybe... I really did misunderstand her. She agreed to help me without asking for anything in return... back then, she also said that she somehow missed her creations, and now this... maybe she's just a normal person after all.
But when Ruan Mei turned around and Stelle looked at her face, she remembered why this woman gave her the creeps.
"Of course I wouldn't create the Iron Cavalry. If my goal was to protect a planet at war, I wouldn't create beings capable of emotions. You do not need such things to fight."