Chapter 14
An arrow flew out and pierced the wolf in the heart, killing it instantly, and taking the pressure off of Vossan, who promptly let his massive tower shield rest on the ground.
“Took you long enough, pointy ears,” said Vossan.
“I was attempting not to skewer you, midget. An action I now thoroughly regret.”
Kiera felt a migraine coming on. Why do elves and dwarves hate each other, again?
Dorn felt obligated to reply, “Elves are a species that place a high value on manners and politeness, and the dwarves...well, they don't. Believe it or not, such a simple difference has led to all the conflicts between the two peoples. It's a shame, since the dwarves are the best smiths and the elves are the best enchanters. Working together would make much more sense.”
Kiera groaned, I didn't actually want to know, I was just venting.
“Well vent in your own head, then,” said Dorn.
Kiera rolled her eyes and stopped herself from snapping that she was venting in her own head. Then she spoke to her team, “Alright guys, good work, we've finished the seventh level. Everyone look for treasure chests in this room.”
Finding some rare herbs, they passed all of them to Thalia, the team's resident alchemist.
I wish I knew some alchemy; it looks fun.
Dorn said, “Don't lie; you think it's lucrative.”
Can't it be both? thought Kiera.
“Hey Thalia, would you mind teaching me some alchemy after this?” Kiera asked.
“I would be honored, lady Kiera,” replied Thalia.
“Thanks,” Kiera responded.
“Couldn't your benefactor teach you? What was his name again, Don?” Jeromy asked.
Dorn quickly replied in his head, “I'm going to kill him. Here I go...”
A wolf suddenly ran into the room and snapped at Jeromy. With a lazy swing, Jeromy thrust his dagger through the wolf's eye and into its brain. Watching it get absorbed into the dungeon, Jeromy subsequently picked up the wolf heart that was left behind. “Blechh, can't believe this goes into things that we drink,” he said.
Thalia came up and plucked the heart out of his hand, saying, “This heart is a critical component of regeneration potions, and is therefore very valuable. I didn't notice you complaining when you get to take regeneration potions.”
“Actually, I do, and very loudly. They taste like wolf offal, surprisingly. Couldn't you add some mint or something to freshen up the flavor?” Jeromy asked.
“You will never be an alchemist, master Jeromy. Or a chef. A fact we are all no doubt grateful for,” responded Thalia.
Suddenly, Vossan called out that he had found a chest, and that it was locked. It was high up on a cliff overlooking the clearing where they had fought two wolves. Jeromy merged into shadow and re-appeared next to Vossan a moment later. With a quick insertion of his trusty lock picks, the chest popped open. Inside was five bottles with a sparkly light blue color. Jeromy placed a drop on his tongue, and suddenly said, “Well what do you know, it's a regeneration potion. And it tastes great. I think you could learn a thing or two from this dungeon, mistress Thalia.”
He then tossed the vials at Thalia, who caught them with her off hand. Kiera was amazed at the subtle display of dexterity by the elf. Thalia smelled the potions, and then started muttering, “But how can you use blue snakeweeds to make a regeneration potion...”
Kiera suddenly thought, you did that on purpose didn't you?
Dorn said, “Maybe. It gets pretty boring watching all the shitty D-level adventurers going around.”
So why don't you finish off your D-levels, install your boss floor, and open up C-Housing and C-Mining?
Dorn said, “Great art cannot be rushed, Kiera. You must be patient.”
Can't figure out what to build?
“Gah it's so frustrating. I thought dungeons had some sort of innate ability to design levels, but nope, it's all up to the mind, and I have builder's block. The whole reason I finished the boss level is because I couldn't figure out what to do with the eighth floor, which I subsequently finished. Now I can't figure out what to do with the ninth. It's so frustrating. Oh you should probably pay attention to that weirdo in your party, he's been trying to get your attention for the last thirty seconds.”
“Sorenia to Kiera, wake up Kiera,” said Jeromy, waving his hand in front of her face.
“Ah, sorry Jeromy, I was somewhere else.”
“Clearly, we've been asking you if you want to go on to the eighth floor now.”
“Sure, let's check it out.”
***
Dorn watched as her party teleported into the eighth floor. He was pretty proud of this floor, even though it was an obvious rip-off of the nature dungeon. The teleportation glyph was right in the center of the floor, underneath a massive willow tree. This massive tree would one day provide cover from the perpetual rain Dorn would have falling in the jungle, just as soon as he bought Dungeon Weather. The jungle spread out into one massive cavern. For this floor, Dorn got rid of the central monster room idea and just turned the whole level into a monster floor. Everywhere were snakes and lizards and birds.
This level was a bit unique, as it introduced multiple boss monsters. In each of the cardinal directions, Dorn placed a platform on the ground. The platform was in the shape of an arch, but laid down on the ground. The entire platform was made out of stone. On the northern platform resided an enormous python enhanced with Earth magic and a strong paralytic venom. On the eastern platform, he put another of his bearded dragons, this one larger than the previous, and faster too. He enhanced it's leg muscles to give it quick leaping power. For the other two platforms, he finally added new monsters to his D-level floors. For the western platform, he placed a common kobold enhanced with dark magic. And finally, on the southern platform, he placed a dungeon classic: a giant spider.
When he destroyed his previous lair, he had captured the patterns for common spiders. He simply pumped around 50 DP's into the spider, very slowly, to bring it up to size. He gave it metal-enhanced mandibles (a subset of Earth magic) and he strengthened its web so its adhesiveness would scale to larger enemies. Finally, in a bout of deviousness, he gave it a slow-acting neurotoxic venom. If a person was bit, he or she would need to receive a cure poison spell or purifying potion within the next hour or else die.
For each monster's loot, he magically tied a specific gemstone. The snake got malachite, the bearded dragon got azurite, the kobold received larimar, and the spider dropped a sunstone. Each gem was carved with a symbol of the monster who dropped it. All four gemstones were required to open the small, square room found on the opposite side of the willow tree from the entrance teleportation glyph. The small room just contained a teleportation glyph that would allow one to enter the ninth floor. The room also had a space shield to keep out those who would try to enter without collecting the four gems. To compliment this feature, he simply made it impossible to reach the ninth floor except through the glyph on the eighth floor. It made for a nice detour. Of course, when someone had used the glyph to the ninth floor once, they could then continue to use any glyph in the dungeon to reach the ninth floor and beyond. It wouldn't do to make people always come to the eighth floor when moving lower.
Dorn watched as Kiera's party moved across the jungle. It was still too easy of a floor for a group of four C and above ranked adventurers. They stopped now and again for Thalia to pick useful herbs as they made their way across. Dorn noticed that one of his large cats was now stalking Kiera's party across the jungle. He watched it pounce and...Jeromy chucked a knife through its eye. Dorn grumbled; he really needed to finish off his D levels before Kiera's party simply got bored. Then he was struck with inspiration. But first, he needed to ask something of Kiera, “Hey Kiera, have you given your party a name yet?”
No, not yet, Kiera thought.
“Well, can you come up with one?” Dorn asked.
What, right now?
“Yeah. It's for a great idea I just came up with.”
Kiera turned to her party members and said, “Hey guys, I just thought that we should give ourselves a team name.”
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Jeromy said, “You suddenly had this thought in the middle of a dungeon floor? Pay attention to your surroundings.”
Ignoring him, Kiera continued, “How do you guys like 'Diverse Dungeon Divers'?”
Everyone just groaned. Thalia said, “Kiera, honey, that's not exactly a great name.”
Vossan suggested Underground Miners to universal disdain.
Finally, it was Jeromy, despite being grumpy at having this discussion on a dungeon floor, who came up with a suggestion that everyone liked: Seekers of Capital. It spoke directly to everyone's motivation for being here. Thalia was here for a celestial tree, Vossan for rare metals, and Kiera for money and power. Kiera asked however, “Jeromy, you've never told me what it is you're here in the dungeon for.”
Jeromy had a strange look pass across his face, but only very briefly. The entire team missed it. He said, “Oh, I'm here for the same reasons as everyone else, money and power.”
Kiera then thought in her head, Alright Dorn, we're the Seekers of Capital.
Dorn said, “Great, thanks.”
So aren't you going to tell me why you needed our team name?
Dorn projected a grin, saying, “You'll see later.”
Kiera just grumbled unhappily.
***
Dorn looked up towards the inn on the D-floor housing. It was currently full of excited D-rank adventurers, sitting apart from a group of dejected-looking Church knights and paladins. It turned out that Jeromy had won the bet, at guessing five days until the Churches gave up. The priests gathered everyone present and headed over to the church that Dorn had created. They started preaching how Dorn was a gift from the gods to humankind, as he would train their holy warriors in the extermination of devils and demons. Dorn could only snort in extreme derision.
With the Church members gone from his core floor, he was now free to enact his brilliant stroke of genius. He raised a stele in the middle of the common room, pushing some tables out of the way. Everyone in the inn quieted as he began to carve the stele. It eventually ended up looking like this:
Current Dungeon Leaders
Party Name
Level Completed (Time)
Seekers of Capital
8 (2:47:48)
Voices of Fortune
7 (1:30:52)
Unknown Killers
7 (1:35:26)
Revenant Admirals
7 (2:25:58)
Raincrawlers
7 (4:16:28)
Knights from the Empire
6 (1:15:27)
Lowguards
6 (1:57:52)
Massive Gods
6 (2:37:48)
Shame of the Fortunate
6 (3:38:12)
Stormstand
5 (0:36:28)
A great commotion suddenly broke out in the inn's common room, as everyone began talking at once. The ten groups were almost completely unknown. People could guess who the Seekers of Capital were, as only one dungeon party had a B-ranked practitioner and three C-ranked practitioners. It caused groups to suddenly rush out to the dungeon, attempting to get on the board.
At the end of each floor, next to the exit teleportation glyph, Dorn raised a stele showing the fastest D-ranked teams to complete the respective floor. Any team with a member at or above C1 rank practitioner would not qualify for these newest steles. Dorn could just imagine eventually having every floor's top ten fastest times taken by the same S-level teams.
It was at this point that Kiera's team finally made it back to the inn. Taking one look at the stele, Jeromy said, “Well, that's going to get a lot of people killed.”
I take it this is your idea? asked Kiera.
“Yeah isn't it genius? People will get themselves killed just to earn a spot on a board. It's the draw of fame.”
I prefer money, thought Kiera.
“Ah good point. Hold on a minute.”
At this point, a disgruntled-looking Jerry1 spoke up to the room: “The top ten teams will receive free rooms and drinks at the inn.”
At this pronouncement, the entire inn started cheering. Kiera just rolled her eyes.
***
Dorn finally turned to his ninth and final D-level floor. He decided to work through his builder's block. He lowered the floor into the earth by a couple thousand feet. It cost surprisingly little to do so.
“Hey Emelia, how deep can I go?”
“Seriously? That's what she said. Come on, you're making it too easy.”
“Gah, why do you keep saying that every day? I don't get what you mean; just answer my damn question.”
Emelia gave a long and dramatic sigh. “There's no theoretical limit to how deep your floors can reach, but you need to pay attention to air pressure and temperature the deeper you go. At a certain point, people will die simply entering the floor, so you will need to purchase Dungeon Weather to combat that.
“Good to know,” said Dorn.
Dorn then lowered his floor to have a truly massive height of 7,000 feet. This would make this floor's canyon have a slightly larger depth than Sorenia's famous The Large Canyon. Truly a terrible name, thought Dorn. I much prefer The Dry Canyon, it's got a certain ring to it.
Emelia, peeking at his thoughts, said, “If you're planning on putting a giant river at the bottom of the canyon, why are you calling it The Dry Canyon?”
“Stay out of my head, Emelia. It's bad enough having to talk to you all day.”
Emelia huffed and thought about zooming off to another floor in annoyance, but she managed to contain herself. “Just answer the question.”
“It's because it's a great name, and what would a canyon be without a river?” answered Dorn.
“Well those are stupid reasons,” said Emelia.
“Ask stupid questions and you get stupid answers.”
“That saying doesn't apply here,” Emelia said with great annoyance.
“What saying?” asked Dorn.
Emelia decided to just ignore him and watch as he built the ninth floor. Now that he was deep enough in the crust that he didn't have to worry about causing earthquakes or cave-ins, Dorn decided to make an enormous level. It would serve as the battling grounds for D-level adventurers to grow into C-levels. They would have a challenge just surviving the long time it would take to cross this floor. Dorn expanded the floor to be a rectangular prism about 100 miles long and 20 miles wide. With 2,000 square miles to play with, Dorn began by carving off the first 200 feet of stone across the top of the floor. Along the ceiling he placed his trusty sky illusions and sun light. He cranked up the intensity of the light, making the land into a true desert landscape.
Dorn was finally forced to buy the Dungeon Weather property for his dungeon. First, though, he had to level up his dungeon to level 20, costing him another 90,000 DP's, and netting him access to another two floors. Emelia then warned him that getting new floors would now only happen every five levels. Dorn grumbled some more at the draconian rules of the gods. Then he snorted at his use of the adjective.
Anyways, during the day cycle, temperatures would reach into the high 90's. At night, it would chill down to the low 20's. Then he cut a staggered canyon into the ground, and had it wind around in complex patterns. It cut all the way from one side of the floor to the other end, bisecting the floor. He cut some paths down the sides of the canyon that would lead to various caves filled with treasure and monsters. Finally, he came down to the bottom of the canyon. He built a vigorously moving river into the bottom. And filled it with crocodiles. They didn't really belong in a desert environment, but he didn't want people just floating their way down river, or walking along the pleasant beach on either side of the river.
After that, he populated the massive canyon with all sorts of life. For plants, it was mostly cacti. A few hundred yards away from the canyon, on each side, he built a forest. He simply populated them with the usual prey animals and un-enhanced foxes. For the canyon part, lizards and snakes fit the room perfectly. He finally got to put his eagles and hawks to good use. With all the insects, he decided to buy bats from the store for a few thousand points, before populating some caves with them. After setting up a good ecosystem, he decided to do something rather fun. He purchased goblins, goblin chiefs, and goblin shamans from the store for a total of 100,000 points. Then he inserted various villages of goblins all along the cavern. The goblins, without any natural predators, took easily to the floor. As some of the weakest monsters in existence, goblins were perfect for his D9 difficulty floor.
Watching the villages of goblins take shape, he felt kind of bad for what they would be going through on a regular basis. Oh well, as a dragon, his moral quandaries on taking lives weren't too serious. He looked around the floor with its thriving ecosystem, deep canyon, and felt it was missing something.
Emelia finally piped up, “Do you think it's too big? Won't it take at least a week for adventurers to cross this floor without Air magic? And they'll have nothing to do the whole time; they'll get bored.”
Dorn thought, “That's it. It's missing activities.”
Emelia snorted, “Activities? What, are they children?”
Dorn said, “No, but they need something to look forward to, like the steles that mark the top ten highest ranked parties.”
Dorn and Emelia paused and gave it some thought. In the mean time, Dorn set up a little station at the entrance teleportation glyph that would give out compasses to the adventurers. He just made them point towards the exit glyph instead of North. This way, the adventurers wouldn't get lost in the enormous cavern he had built.
Failing to come up with any ideas, he turned to his favorite human. “Kiera, if you had an enormous floor that would take adventurers about a week to cross, and you wanted to come up with some activities to keep them interested, what would you do?”
Dorn, what did you do? asked Kiera.
“I made a floor. I feel like that was obvious.”
Big enough to take a week to cross?
“Yeah, it'll be a fun adventure for everyone.”
I think people are going to be pissed. Don't you think that it's too difficult for D-ranked adventurers.
“I think I don't care...let me check...nope, don't care. It's their final test before ranking up. It'll serve as a coming-of-rank trial. Now, any ideas for activities?”
What's the floor design?
“It's an enormous canyon with a river at the bottom.”
Put in a water slide.
Dorn snorted at Kiera's less-than-helpful idea, thinking of a 7,000 foot high water slide. He would just have to keep thinking of activities he could install for the adventurers. He knew he could put something in the caves.
“That's it!” Dorn exclaimed.
He got to work populating his various caves with his new idea.