Chapter 13
“Stop,” Dorn said.
What, why?, asked Kiera.
Dorn replied, “There's two B9 ranked chi practitioners hiding in the woods.”
Fuck, not again. Think they're here for me?
“Unless you can think of a D-ranked human adventurer who calls for two B limit ranked assassins, then yes,” Dorn sent with an eye roll.
Kiera turned around and marched straight over to the newly finished guild hall. Marching into Warley's office, she said, “There's two B9 ranked assassins hiding in the woods.”
Warley responded with the obvious, “And you know this how?”
Woops, thought Kiera, forgot about pretending to learn the information you give me.
“Well, I gotta say, I'm interested in how you're going to get out of this one, because I think you're fucked,” Dorn said.
“Uhhh,” Kiera mumbled, “I just do?”
“Uh huh,” said Warley.
“Anyways, could you escort me to the dungeon teleportation glyph?”
“Uh huh,” said Warley. “I'm going to figure out your secret some day. No one just appears from the middle of nowhere, a once bounty hunted young merchant girl from Ilsan, and suddenly finds a new dungeon, and then happens to skyrocket two levels in chi practice, almost overnight. Oh, and somehow discovers two B9 ranked assassins hiding in the woods.”
Kiera just smiled prettily. “I have no idea what you're talking about.”
Dorn and Warley both snorted. Emelia just giggled in her head. But it did have the effect Kiera was looking for, as Warley got up from his desk and said, “Let's go meet these two assassins and see what they're doing here.”
***
Dorn was pleased, very pleased. Two B9 chi practitioners had just died in his body. He was so happy that he started chortling to himself. That's when Emelia told him to knock it off and that it was getting weird. Dorn said, “Emelia, you don't understand, I just got 1.8 million DP's.”
Looking down at the two dead assassins who had both killed themselves with poison after being caught by Warley, Kiera looked pissed. “Why do they keep sending assassins after me?”
“Oh come on, you can't possibly not know the answer to that, right?” asked Warley.
“But, I'm not even getting any money off my investment. I'm just letting the people come here for free,” said Kiera.
“Yeah, well, too bad you don't know who wants to own the dungeon, as you could just sell it to them for a decent profit. Oh well, sucks to be you. Keep an eye out for more assassins above your rank, whom you shouldn't even be able to notice at your chi level,” Warley said while walking back to town.
Then, Dorn said to Kiera, “If it makes you feel any better, sending assassins after you is the best thing that ever happened to me. Their energy made me able to buy just about anything I want.”
Strange, that doesn't make me feel better. Kiera just muttered to herself as she continued the walk to the arches room. Stepping up to the teleportation glyph, she thought towards Dorn, wait, this isn't dangerous, right?
Dorn said, “Nope, disabled all the dangers, just need a tester.”
Kiera stepped into the teleportation glyph and thought to herself, tenth floor. After blinking the blindness from the flared light out of her eyes, she looked around. That's when she saw the stele Dorn had erected. Reading through it all, she thought towards Dorn, Gods Dorn, what the fuck is up with all these rules?
“I've designed a test that is a much more precise way of determining if someone has reached the level of a C-ranked adventurer or not. My chief concern was wealthy people using money to get strong adventurers to escort them down to higher ranked housing floors. To combat this, I installed the instances and the first half of the boss floor. Every person who lives in C-ranked housing will be at the level of a C-ranked adventurer, no exceptions. If I allowed alchemy and enchanted weapons, the same problem would remain. As for forfeiture rules, that's the mercy I offer to D-ranked adventurers. In the next boss floors, there will be only three forfeitures allowed for moving to B-ranked, one for moving to A-ranked, and none for moving to S-ranked.”
But what about the never returning to this level rule?
“Ah, that's so you can't get the rewards from this level twice. And the rewards from this level are extremely generous.”
Hearing this, the inner greedy hamster in Kiera starting dancing its happy dance. Kiera, with the same manic grin in her eye that Vossan had when he talked about mining, thought, how do I start?
Dorn said, “Thought you'd like that part. Just go through the door that says 'healer'.”
Pushing open the door and walking through, Kiera looked at the orb. Didn't I already use one of these?
“Just read the stele, Kiera. Gods, you're becoming more like Emelia with every passing moment,” said Dorn.
“What, you mean not grumpy and stern all the time?” asked Emelia.
“No, I mean air-headed” said Dorn.
Oh thanks for clarifying, Dorn, I had no idea what you meant. Kiera then proceeded to push some chi into the orb. Expecting a flash like when using the chi affinity testing orb, Kiera was disappointed when the only thing that happened was the exit door opening. Kiera walked through.
So was that it for the first half of this level? Kiera asked.
“No, there's a second part,” said Dorn.
Kiera walked in and read the stele in this room:
One minute after pressing the button,
you will have three minutes to heal an
injured and unconscious animal that
will appear in the middle of the room
Hmm, that seems easy enough. Almost too easy, Kiera thought.
“Remember, this is just for going to the C levels. And with the threat of death looming over them, many will panic and fail. But you don't have to worry about that, because I haven't enabled the death mechanisms yet.”
Kiera went ahead and pushed the button. Suddenly, a loud version of Dorn's voice said, “One minute until test begins.”
Kiera looked annoyed. Really?
“Forty-five seconds until test begins.”
“Thirty seconds until test begins.”
This has got to be the most annoying thing in the world.
Dorn said, “It's supposed to be intimidating.”
“Fifteen seconds until test begins.”
Nope, just annoying.
“Well I like it; I'm not getting rid of it. Anyways, stop yapping, go take your test,” said Dorn.
“Five, four, three, two, one, test start.”
A giant wolf with a sword wound across its entire side suddenly laid in the middle of the floor, and the small spatial shield covering the center of the room in a column from floor to ceiling disappeared. Kiera walked up to the wolf and started pushing mana into the wolf's body. After using this to diagnose the wolf's wound, which was festering, Kiera turned the mana into Healing magic, using it to first wash out all the little pieces of infection within the wolf's body. Then, she used the magic to push its two ribs that were sticking out back into alignment, before healing them. Then she slowly stitched the skin back together, leaving a bald spot along the right flank of the wolf.
This book's true home is on another platform. Check it out there for the real experience.
“Congratulations, you have passed the first half of the boss floor. Claim your reward,” said the disembodied voice.
At mention of the reward, Kiera basically skipped towards the treasure chest, opened it, and...nothing. Where's my fucking reward?
“Gods, hold on a second, I need to first buy Dungeon Enchantments...there, got it. Alright, close the lid and re-open it.”
Kiera opened the lid and gasped. Inside was a full healer's uniform. Cloth covered boots, cloth cloak, leather pants and shirt, and a belt. All were enchanted. What does each do? asked Kiera.
“The boots give you enhanced footwork, allowing you to escape and move about the battlefield a little more agilely. The leather pants and shirt are enchanted for extra defense, they should be able to block the attack of a middle C-ranked adventurer or lower. The cloak will increase the potency of your healing slightly. And the belt has an active enchantment. Go ahead and try to activate it,” Dorn said.
Kiera put on the belt and pushed some mana into it. Sensing the enchantment, she was able to activate it with mana. Suddenly, one of those spatial shields that Dorn created everywhere surrounded her in a small sphere. Ten seconds later, it winked out and began absorbing environmental mana.
That's awesome. It's like an emergency lifeline. Too bad it doesn't last longer.
“Don't be greedy; remember, this is the reward for newly raised C-ranked adventurers. Being invulnerable for ten seconds can make all the difference between life and death. Alright, you ready to be sent back to the housing floor?”
Wait, Kiera thought, what about the second half of the level?
“I've set it up as a fight against five kobolds. Why? Do you want to fight them?” Dorn asked.
Depends, Kiera thought, what's the reward?
“A class-appropriate weapon,” said Dorn.
Gods, you're going to put the enchanters, blacksmiths, and armorers out of business.
“Just the C-ranked ones. D-ranked adventurers will still need equipment, and B-ranked adventurers and above will too. Besides, the wealthy will want a new set of equipment once they reach the high C ranks. So, are you fighting the kobolds?” asked Dorn.
You're gods-damned right.
Dorn sighed and said, “Your love of money will be the end of you, one day.”
Bah, what would a rich dragon turned dungeon know about struggling to make money?
***
Watching Kiera teleport back to the housing floor with her new staff (it was capable of holding a small amount of mana to act as a battery), Dorn was pondering over his floor. “So, what do you think, Emelia.”
“It seemed pretty easy for her, but I guess that makes sense seeing how she's a C4 ranked practitioner.”
“Yeah, that's what I was thinking. Do you think I should increase the time given to healers to do their task?” Dorn asked.
“Nah, she finished it in half the time, so C1's should be able to complete it in under three minutes,” Emelia responded.
“Good point,” said Dorn.
“Status,” Dorn said.
Status
Name: Dorn'axial
Dungeon Name: A Dragon's Dungeon
Dungeon Level: 15
+1 for 16,000 DP's
Floors: 11/13
Dungeon Points: 1,601,429
Dungeon Rating: C1 – Your dungeon
has progressed to the level of a
nationally recognized dungeon
Dorn now had some decisions to make. “What should I buy?” asked Dorn.
Emelia, suddenly serious, said, “Don't waste them on anything besides getting alchemy. The auction's coming up in a month, and you'll want to have your points ready for it.”
“So soon? Am I even going to be able to afford anything at the auction?” Dorn asked.
“Of course, there's a ton of stuff available for purchase, and most of it goes un-bid on. Besides, you've already gotten most of the Dungeon Properties from the store by now. All that's left, besides alchemy, is your avatar, the Dungeon Path Randomizer, Dungeon Flight, and weather. All four of those can wait until after the auction. As for the traps, you don't need them, as long you're moderately intelligent, which you are. The dungeon puzzles are fun, but they usually come much later in the dungeon. As for resources and creatures, I think you're doing just fine with your massive stocks you prepared before becoming a dungeon.”
“I've been meaning to ask, what is the Dungeon Path Randomizer?” Dorn asked.
“It's for labyrinth levels. It makes it so that the adventurers can't simply map out the level and then breeze through the labyrinth every time after. With a path randomizer installed, the labyrinth will randomly re-arrange itself once every day.”
Dorn said, “That's an incredible device. I really want it.”
“Just wait for the auction, there will be items that you can't even believe exist there.”
Dorn believed her, so he only spent 300,000 DP's buying Dungeon Alchemy. Immediately, he started filling treasure chests on the seventh floor with a few of the basic potions he knew how to make. This made him have a great idea for the first open level of the C-ranked rooms. He would make a completely underwater level, except for the entrance chamber. The entrance chamber would have fountains of two potions: the Underwater Breath potion and the Amphibian Transformation potion. That would be fun. But he knew he couldn't build that now.
Turning to the eighth level, Dorn felt ready to complete his D level floors.
“Hey look, an elf is here,” Emelia said suddenly.
Dorn stopped his planning to look up. Low and behold, Emelia was right. “Think she has come to sacrifice the cutting of a celestial tree?” he asked.
“Probably, but she won't do it until after she comes to trust you. You should send Jerry3 to welcome her. Great naming sense by the way.”
“Thanks, I am a pretty great namer if I do say so myself.”
“Oh, and you should prepare yourself to tamp down on your greed, for when she sacrifices the celestial tree cutting. It'll take about exactly the number of DP's you get out of it to create a small sapling in your dungeon. The benefits will be immense, and not just for the elves. Your dungeon's mana will become more pure just from having the tree within you,” Emelia said.
“I think I'll be fine,” Dorn said dryly, clearly ignoring Emelia's warning.
“You might not be, a celestial tree cutting will be worth anywhere between ten and twenty million DP's.
Dorn choked. “What the fuck? Are you serious?”
“Deadly.”
Dorn started grinding his non-existent teeth, thinking back over the promise he made Jerry make on his trip to the elves' grove. Too bad his dragon pride wouldn't let him renege on a deal. This was going to just about kill him. He now knew what Kiera felt like. To take his mind off the impending equivalent trade with the elves, he asked a question he had been wondering about, “Are you sure I can't go ahead and buy my Dungeon Avatar?”
“The Dungeon Avatar is a bottomless pit of DP's. Most people cultivate to gain strength. The Dungeon Avatar starts at C5 rank, and every rank up costs a ludicrous number of DP's. It's what dungeons end up spending all their DP's on. Even some of the super-dungeons don't have SS-ranked avatars,” Emelia said.
“Then shouldn't I get a head start on my avatar? Before I have to challenge the other A level dungeons?” Dorn asked.
“No, wait for the auction. If you think the avatar is better than all the other options out there, then you can simply not buy anything and get your avatar afterward. What's with the rush?” Emelia asked exasperatedly.
“I don't like that Jeromy character spending so much time with Kiera,” Dorn blurted out before realizing what he said.
“Are you fucking kidding me?” Emelia asked.
“I'm telling you, there's something off about him,” Dorn said defensively.
“There's something off, alright, and it's the fact that a dragon turned dungeon has fallen for a human mortal. Seriously, dungeons don't even have libidos. What the fuck? Aren't you around 3,000 years older than her?”
“That's not it; I just don't trust him,” Dorn said defensively.
Emelia couldn't even deign to reply. She just huffed off, shaking her head at the madness the world had come to.
Dorn thought to himself, it's not that, right? But no one answered. He turned back towards the eighth level and started to build. It would be another homage, to one of his favorite levels in the nature dungeon, this time.
***
Returning to the inn, Kiera got a lot of looks for hew new outfit. Jeromy was waiting for her.
“Where did you get such nice garb?” he asked.
Ready with her excuse this time, she said, “My benefactor had these sent to me. Do you like it?”
Jeromy said, “It's very nice. If I'm reading the enchantments correctly, it should make you a formidable healer. But who's this benefactor?”
“Oh, his name's Dorn. He's the one who taught me the method I use to cultivate chi.”
“Ah, so that's why you were able to jump two levels in chi cultivation so quickly. Any sharing of technique for your favorite team member?” Jeromy asked with a cheeky smile.
“That's weird, I don't see Vossan around here anywhere.”
Jeromy just scowled. That's when an elf walked into the inn. Heading directly to Kiera and Jeromy's table, she sat down.
“Um, hello?” asked Jeromy.
Thalia said, “It's nice to meet you, I'm Thalia. If I understand correctly, you're the one who found this dungeon?”
Kiera, slightly nervous, said, “Yes that's correct, how can I help you?”
Thalia said, “Do you trust this dungeon?”
Kiera asked, “What?”
“It's a simple question, do you trust this dungeon?”
“It's a dungeon, what is there to trust?” asked Kiera.
At this point, Dorn interjected, “Well that's nice of you; I think I'm very trustworthy. Also, could you mention that to the elf? I kind of have a special deal going on with the elves.”
What? Are you two-timing me?
“You have got to be shitting me.”
I am, Kiera thought with a big smile. Then, to the elf, she said, “Yes, I trust this dungeon. So far, none of the signs have lied, and we have all been given such a nice place to live.”
“Hmm, I suppose you are correct. Would you mind if I joined you in diving in this dungeon? I'm something of a scout for my people, and they would like to know if it would be worth coming to this dungeon to live,” Thalia said.
“Sure, I'm Kiera and this is Jeromy. I'm the team's healer and this is our scout. We also have a dwarven tank named Vossan, but he's probably busy mining. Also, if you don't mind, what's your cultivation level and adventurer position?” Kiera asked.
Frowning at the mention of a dwarf, Thalia said, “I'm Thalia. I'm a C8 level ranger.”
Kiera looked suitably impressed at that, “Wow, you're probably the strongest elf I've ever met. If all goes well, do you want to join our party on a more permanent basis?”
Frowning again, Thalia said, “I'll consider it. I'm not too fond of dwarves, and they seem to have no love lost for my people either. But I try not to generalize based on race, so I'll consider after diving with your team.”
At this, Thalia got up, bowed, and left the inn.
Jeromy finally spoke after she left, “Well she's an odd one. Kind of cold.”
“I like her; she's like if someone took you and made every single point of your personality exactly the opposite.”
Jeromy mock scowled, “You're going to regret saying that. Two hours of extra magic sparring tonight.”
Dorn interjected, “I really don't like him.”
Emelia said, “Just ignore the grumpy dungeon. He's busy being the biggest moron of a dungeon I've ever heard of.”
Kiera smiled and thought, You jealous, big dungeon?
Dorn just grumbled.