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2.1 A good Day to Die Again

1. A GOOD DAY TO DIE AGAIN

I woke up to the sound of feet trampling through the forest. A mana-enriched breeze stirred the forest, unmasking wild energy to the north. The rustling noises rapidly moved away from me toward the chaotic energy.

My heart beat wildly. I grasped at the pain in my chest, hoping to dull it. Tears landed softly on the ground. I took a deep breath and then another. The pain inside grew into a wildfire. An unquenchable burning urge to see my friends again. No. To never see my friends like that again. For them, I would get stronger. For them, I would bring down the heavens.

"Lana," I whispered. "I will save you."

There was nothing more that I wanted than to take another run after my friends. What were the loops for, if not to waste lives? And seeing Lana, Flint, and Rocky again was not wasting lives. It was good for my soul to see them. With that in mind, it was a good day to die again.

On the other hand, I knew I needed to suppress my urges. Each loop came at a cost. And even if I were to make progress in battle against mages, there was practically a zero chance I would make it out of the fight with my squad alive.

Reason won out.

I closed my eyes and entered my mindscape. I had just fought on the battlefield of mages. There was a lot I wanted to learn from the fight, as well as sharpening my domain.

"That was brilliant," Calypso said as I entered my mindscape. "You defended the mental attack of Zaltur and killed a mage."

"It was a cheap shot. The mage was fighting other mages. He was seconds away from killing me before he got interrupted." I hesitated for a moment, choosing my following words carefully. "Thanks for the help in the fight. I'm sorry about the flayens."

The flayen nodded in acceptance, but I could tell he was conflicted.

During the skirmish, Cal had helped me fend off the attack of Zaltur, a high-ranked mind mage who had singled me out. Given the nature of the battlefield, I didn't have the option of entering my mindscape and fighting off the flayen myself. Unexpectedly, Calypso stepped in for me. In return, I killed Zaltur and another flayen.

It had to be done, but that didn't make me feel any better about it. And it didn't help that I knew Cal's oath had turned him against his people. In time, I hope to be able to help the flayens out. However, that'd be a few years away… if I can even survive in a loop that long.

I'd spent a little more than a couple years in my time loop. Most of the loops were less than a week long. Now, if I could survive long enough, my strengthened core and reforged platinum mind would allow my frozen body to live for four months. Inside my mindscape, I could stretch that to an entire year.

As I meditated, I took a moment to reflect on the loops I'd gone through, tracking what I'd learned, the skills I gained, and the challenges I still faced. Incidentally, much of what I'd learned coincided with the challenges I still faced. In terms of achieving my goals, I had yet to reach the mountain I needed to climb. Tackling the stars was out of the question.

It would be easy to get overwhelmed with all of the barriers. My friends were dead, and though I was making progress in saving them, there were so many caveats.

Once they were saved, could I keep them safe from the empire and assassins?

There was the shadow plague, which sounded like a worldwide disaster. If we somehow survived assassins and plagues, there were two different invaders heading for Helm.

The flayens might be able to be negotiated with. That didn't seem likely, but that depended more on the world leaders than on me. Still, their decisions or actions would impact us. Could Helm even host refugees from other worlds? The flayens weren't just normal cultivators either. By the sounds of it, they were all mind cultivators drunk on their superiority. Even in the best-case scenarios, there was bound to be conflict.

Stolen story; please report.

At the very end, if we survived the flayens, there was the scourge—the world devourers that had caused the flayens to flee their worlds in the first place. My little information on these conquerors led me to believe they were our biggest threat.

Along with the major challenges, I still had a myriad of questions and concerns. The vampires were still fresh in my mind. They were creating a cult in Cyanne and had attacked travelers from Tom's Pond. What were they doing in Cyanne, and why was the empire turning a blind eye to them?

There was also the dungeon in the Bloodwoods. The pack of wolfbears living in the cavern made no sense. Nor did the lone templar ranked cultivator or the rat bastard and his undead rat army. On top of it all, there was still an expansive dark room at the entrance that we hadn't explored thoroughly.

The Bloodwoods held their own mysteries as well.

What was the fire spirit that was created when I burned down a portion of the forest? I don't remember the spirit much, but Cal was adamant that it was responsible for bringing the attention of Purity, one of the assassins hunting me.

Then there was Tom… The sage-ranked grounder also came when I burned the forest and fought Purity and again when I dried the forest up. The first time, he tried to save me; the second time, he killed me. Tom was somewhere in the Bloodwoods, and he was powerful. Stronger than Purity even, and that cold-blooded killer easily put me in my place.

And then there was me. Aside from a lack of power, my memories were degrading. Cal had set in place an attack to try to root me from my body. Cal had been thwarted and seemed loyal to me now, even going so far as to fight against his own people.

However, the memory wiper Calypso created was still active, and there was no way to completely stop it. We'd developed ways to minimize the damage, but my defenses were vulnerable each time I died.

With every failure, a part of me slipped away. The threat terrified me. My memories were the core of who I was. Memories were what made souls so unique. Without them, I'd be lost—a blank slate with no direction, a wanderer in the desert.

The risk of losing my memories made every cycle precious. I couldn't just go about each life without concern for the consequences.

However, as much as the loss of memories scared me, this opportunity I'd been given had been tremendous. Not only did I have a chance to get stronger, I would be able to save my friends. In fact, I expected to be able to reach them before they left the forest once I reforged my body.

My mind was definitely the biggest benefactor of the loops. I had reached nine levels in the mind essence, allowing me to reforge it. The process was difficult, but I persevered and reached a platinum-ranked reforged mind. It was a rank unheard of according to Cal, who was a good source on mind rankings. I agreed with him—according to my research, gold was the highest attainable rank when it came to reforging.

I didn't know precisely what it meant to have a higher-tier mind, but much of my processing seemed faster. The time dilation in my mindscape had significantly increased, and I was beyond a god's power level. If there was such a thing. It felt like I had an incredible depth of power at my disposal; I just needed to learn how to wield it… or capitalize on it.

My cultivation and skill gains were no joke either. I was no longer a lancer. I reached the templar rank and could now exert my will on ambient water mana. Water bent to my will, and my domain was forged against mages. Mages were powers two realms beyond mine. I had no business being among them, yet I could walk into their battlefield… well crawl. I was there, though, and I stood for a time.

However, the chance to stand with mages wasn't because of my domain alone. My domain shattered a few yards shy before I could be in their presence.

The reason I made it as far as I did was my skills. Water razors were developing to incredible strength. Attaching so many water molecules and fighting with them felt like an incredible skill. I didn't have the strength to hurl tidal waves, but I could precisely control hundreds of daggers. The ability to connect and influence water in such a way intrigued me, and I was going to learn more about it.

Travel had gotten faster with skating and anchoring. Basic ice summons, barriers, and ice armor had improved in quality. My summons were now nearly indestructible black ice. Thanks to Cal, I could even summon my own familiar. Water vapors created clouds I could disappear in. They also provided me with information that I could tap into from distances away. While water cycled through my body, I healed and recovered from injuries faster.

I was connected to water on a new level. That connection, along with my reforged mind, gave me confidence that I would be able to take on all my challenges given enough time. I just had to be patient and not worry about what I might lose. I couldn't let fear stop me from saving my friends.

Time might be on my side, but it was a double-edged sword. That meant that I would have to play to my strengths, which was why I was in my mindscape. It was time to push my reforged mind to its limits.

"Cal," I said, breaking the flayen from his inner turmoil. "What else can you teach me?"

"Take a seat." The flayen grinned and ran a hand through his strange beard. "I am going to blow your mind."