Chapter One: The Debutant
...
“Hoping for the best, prepared for the worst, and unsurprised by anything in between.”
- ‘I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings’ by Maya Angelou
…
The warm rays of sun seeped through the leaves, a shadow of the towering trees cast upon the estate, and its white marble porch glinted softly from the sunlight. Cicadas buzzed around the neighborhood, their loud noises quite annoying during the midsummer months.
And there they were, sitting solemnly upon the rough, stone steps. People walked by the three ladies every few minutes, waving and some stopped to chat with them for a few minutes or longer before heading about their day.
“Regardless, even if they are seen as perfect leaders, they will realize that they’ll fail, but they can stand up and move forward with chastity and temperance,” Kamaria’s soft voice flew upon the wind.
Her mother sat on her right, shading her with a broken-white umbrella, its frills and decorations swaying slightly in the breeze.
On her left was her grandmother, both hands rested on her knees as her gaze focused on the ink on the paper she read.
Malika grinned at how far her granddaughter had become. It felt like it was only yesterday that she was a timid young girl, holding her mother’s hand as she and her siblings were all being led to the tall and beautiful mansion they’d been to only a few times when they were slightly younger. It wasn’t strange for them to have forgotten those sporadic visits, so in a way, they considered it their first time visiting Camlann.
Kamaria was sixteen years of age now, the oldest daughter of Zahara and Inigo De La Cruz. Her skin was dark brown, but slightly lighter in comparison to her mother’s. Her dark, almost black, hair reached past her shoulder blades and stopped midway to the middle of her back, curled into ringlets with clumps of hair connected to a pink hair ribbon that kept most of her curls in place.
Just like her late father, she too inherited his almond-shaped eyes, with dark brown irises she was also blessed with.
Kamaria has grown into a beautiful young lady with poise and grace, just as she was raised to be. The older woman pushed her spectacles back on her nose as the book closed and her granddaughter exhaled, her gloved hands gripping the edges of her book.
“You’re almost seventeen now.” Malika ran her fingers through her granddaughter’s locks, “About time you attend the debutante. And your birthday is coming up.”
Kamaria’s lips curled up into a smile. She could imagine herself enveloped in beautiful dresses and grace, dancing under the glimmering lights within the enchanting night. It was a formal event that every girl in the upper crest of society looked forward to, including Kamaria. She has been counting down the days, continuously expecting either her mother or grandmother to bring it up when finally, the time to talk about this event came.
“Time sure flies fast, Kamaria. It was only yesterday you were playing dress up with Jesenia pretending to be noble ladies of the court.” Her mother complimented her, the simple words brought a slight blush to her cheeks.
Kamaria was excited, her heart jumped in the thrill of what was to come when the words rolled out of her grandmother’s mouth.
“I think it’s also time to let you know of your arranged marriage.”
‘What?’
Kamaria shifted uncomfortably in her seat, unsure whether she heard it right the first time. Her fingers fidget with the edge of the book she has in hand. Her stomach was in knots and she couldn’t believe what she heard.
‘Arranged marriage? They can’t be serious.’
But her grandmother wasn’t at all joking.
“You’re old enough to marry, quite…”
The two women continued their talk on the topic. Meanwhile, the young lady was caught up in her mind. She couldn’t hear any of their words, her ears refused to listen to them any longer.
‘I’m not ready for marriage. I don’t want them to decide who I’m going to marry.’
Swallowing through her deserted throat, Kamaria opened her lips, “Who… who am I supposed to marry?” She asked. “And why?”
Kamaria didn’t understand why her mother was pressuring her to get married at such a young age and only at seventeen, and she wanted to get to know the person first before thinking about marriage. What are their likes and dislikes, their hobbies, and everything else that requires in a person? Hadn’t her mother forgotten about that?
“It’s to secure our friendship with the Shields family, dear. Your grandfather once promised Duke Viserion’s father to betrothed their grandchildren together shortly if things didn’t work out between your mother and Viserion,” Malika explained.
“Abiel Darius Shields. He is a year older than you and he attends the same school as you do. Are you in the same class as him?” Zahara asked, removing the umbrella from her daughter as she stood up, her eyes squinted at her daughter’s sudden move. “Where are you going?”
“Yes, we both have the same classes together, and he is the top student in all of them,” she explained gently, “I’m going to put the book back, Mother.” A courteous smile on her lips.
Zahara didn’t think it was proper that she would leave in such a hurry. She scrunched her eyebrows as her daughter stood; this discussion is important and she should not leave.
“Kamaria! You’re not going anywhere right now. This is for your future! You’ll meet him formally at the debutante.”
Zahara’s stern voice entered Kamaria’s ears sharply, but she didn’t stop. Every fiber in her body doesn’t want to continue this conversation. She thought up several ways to apologize as she walked away. Her grandmother glared silently from her seat.
“I don’t know what to do with her anymore, Mother,” Zahara sighed, rubbing her temples in agitation. “How can she possibly be so selfish?” She grumbled, shaking her head in disappointment. Sure, times may change, but she wished the younger generation would keep their old traditions alive instead of dying out.
Especially when it was about manners.
“Such a shame that she had to rush out like that,” Malika agreed, “I don’t understand this generation of children. Always tryin’ to make a sudden change in the world without thinkin’ how their actions might lead to consequences. If I knew Kamaria, she would run off with another boy her age and mingle with the lower class.”
‘Kamaria must marry someone who can ensure her safety. I’ll make sure she does just that.’
While she still missed her beloved son-in-law, Malika couldn’t help but feel angry at him for how stupid he was. Sure, Inigo wanted to protect his daughter from that street fight all those years ago, but could he at least ignore the situation and not intervene? Especially with a small child who doesn’t need to see such violence.
‘Aye, Inigo. Why?’
...
“Kamaria, are you ready?”
Staring into the mirror, a beautiful young lady looked back at Kamaria.
A white gown wrapped around her slender figure, hugging her tightly in all the right places. The bateau neckline revealed her prominent collar bones and an elegant necklace rested against her neck. Adjusting the few dark strands that framed her face, Kamaria inspected her side profile, her eyes trailing along the braided part of her low bun. Both of her hands were enveloped by plain white gloves that ended a couple of inches above her elbow.
She looked just as glamorous as any of the sophisticated young ladies she would soon meet.
‘This is it. Today is the day.’
“Yes, Mother.”
Taking a deep breath, Kamaria walked out of her room, her mother scanned her from top to toe.
It was finally the day for the debutante.
“You look presentable,” Zahara complimented, “Remember to be in your best manners throughout the event.”
Kamaria nodded. She grinned when she spotted her younger siblings standing near the doorway, grinning back at her. Thirteen-year-old Santigo was in awe at the sight of her sister’s breathtaking beauty. She looked a lot like their father.
Soon, Monica would have her season, while Valentina already had hers a month ago.
“You’re going to make a lot of heads turn in that dress. Grandmother wants us to take a picture before we leave,” Santiago said, watching as Kamaria grabbed the hems of her dress to not trip over it.
“Thanks for the reminder, Santi,” Kamaria replied with a small smile, turning toward her sister who felt disappointed that she couldn’t even come. “It’s a shame you’ll miss this one.”
Monica sighed. “I know. I’m just too young. Plus, it’s a school night.” she grumbled, “I can’t wait until I’m sixteen and go to a debutante. Oh, how grand it would be to dance the night away.” She sighed wistfully, twirling in her nightgown, picturing herself dancing with a handsome stranger.
“Remember now, sweetheart. Enjoy your childhood while it lasts. You’ll thank me later,” Zahara said. “Now, off to bed, and don’t give Hannah a hard time when we’re away, children.”
Zahara then gestured for Kamaria to follow her, the two of them walked out of their grandiose house, meeting Takoda, Kamaria’s uncle, in the yard.
“Aw! Look at my niece, all grown up and ready for her debutante.” The middle-aged man grinned proudly, looking at his niece all grown up.
‘Look Inigo… your child has grown. It’s sad how you can’t escort her yourself.’
“Good morning, uncle.” Kamaria smiled.
“Morning.”
They went inside the carriages and Kamaria looked pensively out of the window. Her heart was torn between nervousness, excitement, and annoyance.
‘At least there are two things I can look forward to; this event itself, and meeting Jesenia.’
...
Classical music played on the low, and lights and glamorous decorations scattered neatly around the hall. Fellow ladies dressed in their finest gowns, men with their tuxedos and black ties. Every single guest secretes the vibe of upper-class society, debutantes and escorts alike.
“If it isn’t the Duchess and future Duke of Camlann.” Zahara greeted her until she noticed Duke Viserion’s absence. “Where is he?”
“Lady Zahara,” Duchess Adeena smiled gracefully. A tall young man stood next to her, holding a glass of champagne as he conversed with another guest and she blinked. “He’s out of town for a few days and Abiel’s stepping up in his place.”
Zahara nodded and hummed in response. “I see. I do hope he comes and meets his future daughter-in-law.”
Despite being a middle-aged lady, Adeena was a vision of loveliness and beauty with her auburn complexion and dark brown eyes. Her curly hair cascaded down to her shoulders, and a bang barely covered her tawny-colored right eye. Gold eyeshadow ran along her eyelids; her lips glowed a light peachy color. She looked stunning in her shimmering green gown. Its sweetheart neckline and off-the-shoulder sleeves complement her lean figure well; the fabric wrapped her tightly in the right places, then spread down magnificently to its end.
“Good evening, Duchess Adeena. It’s a pleasure to meet you.” Zahara spoke, “About the engagement, we’ve talked to Kamaria about it and she agrees that it’s just fine.”
Duchess Adeena let out a small chuckle, “Straight to the main topic, I see.” She said, glancing at her son. “Abiel, why don’t you show some respect towards your future mother-in-law.”
Abiel closed his conversation with the other guests, coming straight over. Kamaria stared as the tall and muscular young man with a mixed complexion walked closer, her eyes scanned how his curly dark brown hair was neatly styled and how his matching colored eyes stared at her mother.
‘White buttoned-up shirt… white bow tie… black trousers with two lines of braids down the outside leg… black lace-up shoes… and a black jacket. Typical lavish noble. But I have a bad feeling about him.
Or maybe I’m just nervous.’
“Nice to meet you, Mrs. De La Cruz,” Abiel said, taking the older woman’s hand before cordially planting a kiss on her palm. His eyes then darted towards a beautiful young lady standing next to her mother, with a smile, he spoke: “And you must be Kamaria. I’d never thought I’d meet someone as beautiful as you.”
He scanned her from top to toe, not even hiding the act.
Kamaria glanced up at him, gazing intensely at the young man who was supposed to be her fiancè and slowly offered her hand out to him. The comment made her heart skip a beat, but not in a good way. Nevertheless, she allowed him to take her hand and planted a kiss of formality.
Her stomach twisted into knots.
It was only a formal gesture, yet the way he looked at her managed to make her feel uncomfortable to this extent. One glance at his eyes and you’d notice the forbidding aura behind his smiles and poised gazes.
Abiel pulled away from her, his brown orbs shifted menacingly with a subtle smirk plastered across his face. “Your mother has talked about you before, and I’m glad I’m finally meeting such a beautiful young woman as yourself, Lady Kamaria. The others that I had talked with were starting to become such a chore,” he said, offering his arm out for her to take, “but you’re different from them, baby doll.”
‘He has a glib tongue… but is not too smart to hide his obnoxious comments.
Or maybe he doesn’t care about me being uncomfortable.’
Kamaria fought the urge to cringe at the nickname, but instead, she arched an eyebrow. “What is that supposed to mean?”
He ignored her question as he led her away from her mother and his since they probably wouldn’t notice that they had disappeared while still talking. He’d best assume to leave them alone and get to know his fiancè personally.
“So what do you usually do in your free time, my lady?” Abiel asked as the two stepped out onto the balcony, his other hand was holding a glass of champagne that he had taken on their way there.
Most of the guests are in the hall with one or two lingering balconies away and chatting amongst themselves.
The moon was already high up in the sky. A chilly night breeze caressed Kamaria’s face, pushing the strands of hair that framed her face back with them. Her eyes closely examined the man’s demeanor.
‘Heh… he said one thing but his eyes said another.’
It wasn’t hard for Kamaria to notice his disinterest. Alas, they had to keep up with the act.
“I like to go horseback riding with my sister, Monica. I’m pretty good at that,” she replied, forcing a small smile at him.
Abiel nodded, resting the glass on the golden banister, “Aren’t you scared you may hurt yourself? Riding horses isn’t technically a woman’s expertise,” he unnecessarily pointed out.
Kamaria let out an awkward laugh. “Well, I have fun doing it.”
“No, love.” Abiel stepped closer and pulled her hands gently, “Look at these nimble fingers of yours. You should arrange flowers or play the piano instead.”
“Well, I do play the piano.”
Abiel grinned. “Now that’s more ladylike.”
Pulling her hands out of Abiel’s grasp, Kamaria spoke as she stared into the vast glimmering townscape in front of them. “I don’t see why it’s wrong for me to ride horses.”
“I wouldn’t let you go on if you have my permission.” Abiel took a sip of his champagne. “You can hurt yourself if you ride a horse. What if it goes too fast? What if you don’t know how to stop it?”
“Monica taught me a while ago how to stop if the horse goes too fast. I trust my sister in teaching me,” she stated, planting her hands on her hips. “Why can’t women be on horses? They’re such gentle giants. They wouldn’t hurt a fly.”
Abiel snootily raised his head with his champagne in hand. “All I’m saying is that riding horses isn’t for ladies. Girls like you who are too delicate need to stay with things like knitting, painting, or going to tea parties.”
Kamaria narrowed her eyes, gritting her teeth as she witnessed him lift the glass of champagne close to his lips, tasting the aroma of the drink and bubbles fizzed at the bottom as he swallowed. She fought the urge to chuck the glass into his face, the contents spilling out from his glass and onto his prim and proper tuxedo, and then laughed at his miffed expression.
“Kamaria? What are you thinking about?”
She snapped herself out of her thoughts when Abiel called her. “Huh? Oh…sorry. I was thinking about our engagement.”
Abiel arched an eyebrow, lowering the champagne glass as he stared at her. “What do you think about being engaged to me?” he asked, facing directly toward her.
Kamaria gazed up at him, suddenly surprised as to why he had asked that question. A glimmer of hope sparked in her mind that maybe she has a chance of getting out of this.
“To be honest, I find it to be overwhelming.”
Abiel laughed. “Overwhelming? Kamaria, love. Sure is overwhelming for the daughter of a duchess to be engaged to the future duke, huh? Our statuses are the same. You should feel like the luckiest girl of the year.”
Kamaria rolled her eyes inwardly.
‘Or more like the unluckiest…’
He closed in and his fingers played with some strands of hair that framed Kamaria’s face.
“You should be grateful, you have noble blood at least.”
Kamaria gritted her teeth. The way he talked and touched her on a whim succeeded in making her blood boil.
The man stayed nonchalant to the pent-up anger that started to show over Kamaria’s face and instead moved his face closer to her until his lips were inches apart from her ear.
“Or else I wouldn’t want to waste even this much time talking to you.” His voice was laced with malice. A condescending chuckle escaped his lips before he pulled himself back.
Kamaria’s lips twisted in anger at his antics.
This the man that her mother had envisioned for her? An insufferable arrogant jerk?
However, despite the anger swirling in her chest, Kamaria was afraid of what Abiel would do next. He is indeed the future Duke of Camlann. Any rash actions she did here may affect her whole family, meanwhile, no matter how condescending he talked, he wouldn’t get any severe repercussions for it.
That is the reality here in Camlann.
She could only watch the man as he continued to brag about himself while he finished his champagne and turned to her, his lips wet due to the drink.
Would her mother ever listen to a word she said about her evening with Abiel?
Most likely, not. All her attention and focus would be on the upcoming wedding between her and the distasteful man. A marriage that would give so many benefits to the two of them. She loathed the idea of getting married to him. Heck, they don’t even have anything in common. “Alright, I have to go and greet other guests.” Abiel spoke as he left the empty glass on the banister, “Have a great evening, my lady.” He flashed a smile and a wink, leaving Kamaria behind him.
“Yeah. I will,” Kamaria murmured with a small smile and watched as Abiel left.
As he did so, she could finally breathe without having to be near him. She fought the urge to yell but instead took a deep, calming breath, filling her lungs to the brink before she slowly exhaled.
“I can’t believe that I’m engaged to an arrogant bastard!”
“Talking to yourself again, aren’t you, Kamaria?” A voice asked behind a teasing chuckle.
Turning around, her eyes widened once she spotted who was standing behind her. The young lady looked stunning with her silver dress, which glowed with bluish-gray hues, and a sweetheart neckline with a long cape attached to it. Silver beads adorned her dress and cape, they glimmered gently under the moonlight.
“Jesenia!”
Her dark brown hair was styled into loose curls, falling gracefully midlength to her back, with strands of it tied up with black flower hair clips and a gold hair accessory sticking out from behind. Peach blush complemented her slim cheeks, bronze eyeshadow covered her eyes, and nude lipstick adorned her lips. Gold earrings dangled from her earlobes, and a pair of rose gold ankle-strapped heels hugged her feet.
“I love you so much.”
Kamaria’s sudden words prompt the fancy lady to laugh, “What’s with the sudden greeting?”
“Oh, you don’t know what I had to put up with.” Kamaria sighed deeply. Jesenia pouted, she hummed in understanding and patted Kamaria’s shoulders to console her.
“Poor girl… Love you too, baby sister.”
Jesenia.
Kamaria’s beloved cousin, Tia Hilaria’s daughter. With only a year apart in age and many similarities, the two have gotten along well since they were children.
In return, Kamaria smiled at her, glancing away from her direction, and sighed. “It’s Abiel. I met him tonight; he’s the most obnoxious, arrogant jerk you ever meet. He shuts down my opinions and what I have to say about my hobbies and interests. That guy’s only interested in bragging about himself as if I have to adore him and gape in awe at his marvelousness.” she vented, going over to the banister and leaning against it, “we don’t have anything in common!”
Jesenia gazed at her cousin sympathetically, witnessing a lone teardrop falling from her eyes.
Even though her heart broke, she remained silent as Kamaria ranted about Duke Abiel. She wished she would put him where he belonged. However, if she did so, she would probably end the relationship between her and Duke Abiel, creating a scandal that might damage Tia Zahara’s reputation, which her aunt had worked so hard to establish since she returned to Camlann. Not only that but her own family’s position might also be threatened.
It’s wiser to keep silent and wait. Wait for the right chance.
“I wish that I get you out of this marriage, but I don’t have the power to do such a thing,” she said solemnly, resting a hand on her younger cousin’s shoulder and giving it a tight squeeze, “no doubt Tia Zahara won’t believe a word you’re saying. Or she would, but the benefit of this marriage will make her push you into it anyway.”
Kamaria scoffed, tears brimming in her eyes as she lifted her hand and wiped away her eyes, avoiding tears and ruining her makeup. She hated this feeling of helplessness.
“I know Jes. You’re the only one besides Monica I can talk about this to.”
Jesenia smirked, nudging her playfully. “It makes sense since it’s me. I’m the best.,” she stated, wrapping an arm around her again. “And the adults are too benefit-driven to care about things like feelings.”
Kamaria nodded and hummed in agreement at her response.
She was right, of course.
“You’re overthinking yourself again, Kamaria,” Jesenia noticed, as her younger cousin gazed to the left side of the balcony, staring aimlessly at the water fountain.
Kamaria’s cheeks turned a bright shade of pink as she snapped herself out of her thoughts and glanced over at her cousin, quickly apologizing.
“Sorry. Habit.”
Jesenia laughed. “No worries. I’ve grown used to it. Do you want to head back inside with the others?”
With a shaky breath, Kamaria turned to the older woman, a smile formed across her face as she took a deep breath, realizing by now their mothers were probably worried about them since they’d been gone for a long time, and she feared that they'd send a search party out for both girls.
“I think it’s a good idea. It’s starting to get a little chilly out here,” She stated, feeling a cold breeze and moving away from the ledge with Jesenia following her lead.
A smile formed across Jesenia’s lips as she wrapped an arm around her younger cousin, pulling her close to her to keep warm. To distract her from her impending marriage to Abiel, she decided to tell Kamaria stories about her adventures at college. She was happy to see Kamaria laughing at some funnier stories, prompting her to see the younger girl enjoying herself instead of everything happening in her personal life.
When both girls were in the ballroom, Kamaria quickly recomposed herself, remembering to be on her best behavior. She heaved a sigh, swallowing thickly as she locked eyes with her mother who smiled at the sight of her only niece.
Zahra walked closer to both girls, but her eyes scowled at her daughter. She knew that Jesenia and Kamaria were capable of taking care of themselves, but as a mother, she couldn’t help but worry a little.
‘Hmm… and where's Abiel?’
“Jesenia, I hope you don’t mind. I wish to speak with Kamaria alone for a moment. I’ll catch up with you in a bit,” she began, prompting the young woman to nod and glance in her cousin’s direction.
“Yes, Tia Zahara,” Jesenia replied. She grabbed the tips of her dress, bowing slightly, and gave Kamaria one last glance before heading toward where her mother was waiting. Her eyes filled with sympathy, and she hoped that Zahara would go easy on Kamaria. She then murmured under her breath:
“I hope she doesn’t say anything she’ll regret.”
A smile formed across Zahara’s face at the sight of her eldest daughter. She couldn’t believe how much this little girl had grown. If only Inigo were here...
Tears pricked the corner of her eyes. The woman cupped Kamaria’s cheek, swallowing a lump in her throat.
“You remind me so much of your father, dear. I can see all your features in him,” she began, pulling her hand away from Kamaria’s cheek and asking, “Are you having fun?”
Kamaria blushed. Naturally, as a daughter, she’s the spitting image of her father. From his charming smile to his friendly personality, which often left her grandfather a bit worried because she tends to be too trusting of those she meets, and some are taking advantage of it all. Though at times, she has her limits when she realizes what she has done.
“I miss him, mother. It’s nice that Uncle Takoda escorted us, things would be different if dad took us himself,” she stated, reminiscing the days when she was younger, she and her father would pretend to go to a ballroom and he would escort her, complimenting how she looked beautiful in her dress (which was too big for her). Her face beamed, and she nodded at the question, keeping up a front. “Couldn’t be prouder.”
“That’s my girl.” Zahara beamed, embracing her daughter in a hug. “Put your first foot forward and always reach for the stars.”
‘Ha, as if that was easy enough for me to do right now.’
...
“Your mother had invited me to your birthday party in a few days,” Abiel said, “I told her that I can’t turn down an offer coming from my future mother-in-law.”
Kamaria’s stomach revolted at the mention that her mother invited him to her party. It’s bad enough that she has to deal with him now through the evening and next she has to put up with him for more.
The debutant was coming to a close and after a long night of partying and mingling with guests, she didn't want to deal with Abiel anymore but seeing that Jesenia had left to mingle with her friends, the younger girl wished she could’ve gone with her. Still, her mother insisted on letting Jesenia have some fun.
It doesn’t seem fair.
‘What about my fun?’
After all, Jesenia and her mother live in another wealthy suburb, which isn’t too far from Camlann, and they get to see each other all the time, but not as they used to when they were younger because Jesenia is attending college and the younger girl wished she didn’t have to go away to another state.
Now, here she was. Alone with the boy she was forced to marry. As she vented towards Jesenia earlier, the two of them didn’t have anything in common, but her mother had told her that bonding would happen naturally with time. Marriage is a sense of duty. There’s no time for romance or having a crush.
Kamaria felt an awful pit in her stomach and wished she could just run away for good, but of course, she couldn’t.
Her birthday was in a few days. She and her mother came to a compromise on the theme of her party. A nature theme, something that she had envisioned ever since she was a little girl. Vines wrapped around the house and connected to the trees, lights dangling from them, some spreading around the ceiling, and fireflies glowing as her family and friends enjoyed themselves with one another.
She could already picture the scene.
It would be perfect if only the dreaded face of Abiel Darius Shields didn’t pop up to ruin it.
‘I hope Cressida and Tahira will get the invitations.’
Kamaria thought as she remembered her childhood friends with whom she kept in contact even after she left Anansi, and a chuckle escaped her grasp.
‘Tahira will probably take a long time to find the perfect dress before everything else.’
“Kamaria, baby doll. What are you thinking about?” Abiel asked when he noticed how silent she was becoming, “Are you even listening to me?”
She shot him a glare but held her tongue from saying anything she might regret.
‘Oh of course… not. Why would I want to listen to your hours-long talk about how you defeated your mentors in sword fights?’
Instead, she inhaled through her nose and exhaled through her mouth; politely speaking to him was what she had to do. Oh, how she wished that she would get through to her mother, telling her that this marriage wasn’t right for her.
“Of course, I’m listening. How can I not?” She smiled, “I was just thinking about my party that will be held soon,” she replied. “We have a lot to do before the day arrives.”
“There’s no reason for you to get all worked up, love,” Abiel replied, noticing her eyebrows scrunched up in agitation. “I have no idea why women always want to do so much annoying work.”
Kamaria shook her head. She didn’t say another word as he grabbed her hands and squeezed them tightly in his grasp, his gaze meeting hers.
“A beautiful girl such as yourself doesn’t need to be working herself to the bone. Why not go shopping, read magazines, or do something productive in your time other than doing useless stuff maids and organizers should’ve been doing.”
“So you want me to sit around and have no say over my event?”
Abiel didn’t like the way she was talking to him. How dare she ask him in such a tone like that? They are going to get married after she turns eighteen and graduates from Lion Crest Academy. Her mother always said that studies came important first, but in Abiel’s mind, he doesn’t like the idea that a girl should be studying and getting her head lost in the clouds. He felt his blood boil rise as he narrowed his eyes at the outspoken girl before him.
“Yes. Sitting pretty is what you need to do,” he replied, his hands letting go of hers as he wrapped them around her waist, wanting to teach her such a lesson. “And I don’t like how you’re talking back to me, young lady. Haven’t your mother taught you to treat others with respect?"
It was clear what the young man intended to say:
'Know your place.'
Kamaria glowered her gaze at him but yelped in surprise and disbelief when she felt his hands squeezing her waist. What she didn’t realize is that he slowly injected his fingernails into the back of her dress, finding the opening to the strings that tied up her dress, and jabbed his fingernails into her back. The poor girl felt something sharp in her lower back and realized that it was his nails digging into her skin, even through the fabric.
She gritted her teeth, her breathing hitched at the touch she was given. “What do you think you’re doing?” she demanded, struggling to break free from his grasp, but it was no use. She bit her bottom lip, the sting burning into her back like wildfire.
“Teaching you a lesson.”
Kamaria mentally cursed herself for being as powerless as she was. She didn’t have the strength to stop him, nor to get away from him.
If you spot this narrative on Amazon, know that it has been stolen. Report the violation.
‘I want to push him down the stairs. Let this guy trip and crack his head open for all I care.’
...
It had only been an hour since Kamaria and her mother returned home, with Jesenia and her mother in tow. When they entered the doorway, the group was greeted by Monica and Valentina, who had decided to stay up and await their arrival back home after a long night of dancing and mingling with the guests.
“Tell us about the party! Tell us about the party!”
Their sleepy yet excited voices echoed through the hallway as both girls quickly turned around and moved out of the way to provide space for their family members.
“We’ll talk about it in the morning, girls. And you shouldn’t stay up this late,” Zahara sternly said, her eyes narrowed at her daughters and she stepped inside the house further, rubbing her forehead. “And your grandparents are asleep. Don’t be so loud.”
“Sorry, mother. We couldn’t sleep,” Monica replied, watching as her mother made her way to the loveseat, sitting down on the soft cushions and kicking off her heels, “do you want me to bring your slippers?”
“Yes, dear. And I don’t want to disturb Hannah at this time of night. Valentina, would you be a dear and make me some tea?”
Valentina nodded as both girls headed in different directions of their mansion.
Hannah was the family’s housekeeper, a middle-aged woman who had worked with other families for nearly three decades. By far, she enjoyed working for the De La Cruzes. She was nice but could be strict when she wanted to be when Zahara wasn’t home during the day.
Kamaria watched as her sisters left to help out. A sigh escaped her lips the minute her mother, Hilaria, and Jesenia their feet aching due to standing up for hours at the debutante, but it was worth it.
“I’m going to turn in for the night,” Jesenia announced tiredly to her mother and her younger cousin, bidding her aunt with a small smile across her face as she disappeared upstairs.
Zahara turned to her daughter, eyes piercing through. “Whenever you get ready, I would like to have a word with you,” she began, beckoning Hilaria to sit down as well. “There’s room for one more.”
“I wish I could, but I’m tired. Goodnight, Zahara, Kamaria,” she said, going upstairs to the guest bedroom. Now that the room was empty, Zahara could finally relax for a while as thoughts rumbled in her head like thunder. After bidding her sister-in-law goodnight, she watched her oldest daughter follow behind her aunt, but what she failed to see was the look of sadness on her daughter’s face and turning away to her bedroom to get ready for bed.
...
Kamaria sat in her vanity chair, gazing numbly through the mirror in silence as Jesenia brushed her voluminous curls with her gold hand brush. The bristles pierced through her hair, prompting the girl to sway to the left at each movement. She’d gotten out of her bubble bath not long ago, after staying in the tub for nearly twenty minutes or more to get rid of the wounds when it touched soap.
When Jesenia asked if she needed help with anything, the younger girl hesitated, recalling Abiel's threat to kill her if she told anyone about the wounds she'd received. Upon noticing her cousin’s suspicious gaze traveling down to her back and spotting the small to medium-sized welts on her lower back, Kamaria sobbed, feeling defeated. She didn't care about the consequences because she was terrified of what Abiel would do to her if he found out she had told.
The older girl comforted her, embracing her into a tight hug, and stroking her hair.
“It’s okay. We’ll get through this.” Jesenia spoke as her thoughts formed and collided. Long gone now her tiredness, replaced by blood-boiling anger that swirled underneath her solemn facade.
‘I must try my best to let this engagement fail. No matter what.’
While it did raise her spirits a little bit, Kamaria still felt afraid of what would happen to her.
“Maybe try to talk to your mother about this,” Jesenia suggested, after applying cream onto Kamaria’s back the minute she was out of the tub. “I’m sure she’ll listen once you explain everything calmly and get her to open her eyes. She’ll start to realize what she’s doing is wrong.”
Even with that advice, Kamaria allowed the words to sink in, wanting to consider it for a moment as a last-minute resort if things had gone too far with Abiel. She realized that maybe, she could at least give him a chance and bear through the abuse to please her family.
The bristles on the brush pulled through her curls, prompting Kamaria to wince in pain and let out a yelp. She narrowed her eyes at Jesenia while reaching her hand back and touching her curls to rub the pain away.
“Sorry. At least I’d gotten the tangles out. Make sure to moisturize it in the morning,” Jesenia suggested, pulling the brush away from Kamaria’s dark brown hair and tossing some strands of loose hair in the garbage. “Are you going to talk to your mother about the bruises?”
Kamaria didn’t say anything. She looked away from her vanity mirror, eyebrows scrunched up, lips pursed. She wished that Jesenia would drop it already, but it was too late; Jesenia was determined to do everything she could to break the engagement.
“It won’t be easy trying to talk to her. But it’s worth the shot,” Kamaria murmured, loud enough for her to hear, and hopefully to drop the conversation altogether. “And I wish that getting through to her would be easy.”
Jesenia lowered down, wrapping her arm around her cousin’s shoulders, planting a kiss on her cheek, proud to get her corporate for once.
“That’s my girl!”
...
The minute Jesenia left her room, Kamaria swallowed thickly. She had a few minutes to herself as to what to say to her mother before she reached downstairs to the living room. She took a deep breath, grabbing the single candlestick off her nightstand. The ends of her nightgown swayed with her pace as she opened her bedroom door, the candlestick in her left hand.
Cautiously, Kamaria turned around, hoping that she didn’t accidentally wake up her grandparents even though she tried to be quiet the best she could, grasped the handle between her fingers until she heard the sound of loud snoring coming through the door from her grandparents’ bedroom. Her breath hitched until the sound of Leobardo’s snoring turned into low grumbles and Kamaria assumed that the old man had possibly turned around the other side of the bed.
‘I forgot grandfather sleeps through anything…’ Kamaria thought to herself, rolling her eyes playfully as she crept closer to the staircase. She placed her right hand on the railing, descending the wooden staircase, the creamy carpets absorbed the sound of her footsteps.
With every step she took, Kamaria could hear the sound of her grandfather’s snoring, and that made her body tense. What if he had gotten up and caught her going downstairs at this time of the hour? He’d believed her when she said she and her mother would be talking about the upcoming marriage between her and Abiel, would he?
She rolled her eyes at the thought. It was silly.
‘Must be the nerves that got me overthinking.’
Finally, she reached one last step and took a deep breath, walking close to the doorframe, mentally preparing herself for the conversation. Her head went through the advice Jesenia had given her along with the dialogues she had prepared.
“Mother…” Kamaria called from the doorframe.
‘Seems like grandmother’s asleep.'
While Kamaria didn’t hear her grandmother snoring, she assumed it was because it was being overlapped by her grandfather’s loud snoring. She and her siblings were grateful they didn’t have their snoring habits.
She briefly scanned the room and her eyes focused on the back of her mother, perched upon a single sofa right across the double doors.
A thick, hard-covered book was on her lap, and an empty tea cup rested on the coffee table. The sound of the crackling fireplace soothed her nerves, encouraging her to bring up the sore topic that had been a part of her heart.
Moonlight showered into the room from the window covering the entirety of the west wall, creating gentle glimmers reflected upon the marble floors and paintings of a jazz musician bathed in the light. She meekly stepped inside, resting the candlestick on top of the antique case filled with decorative tea sets.
Glancing behind her shoulders, the woman opened her lips, “Kamaria? Come here…” She invited and rested her book on the side table. She then pulled off her reading glasses, and set them on the table, “You’re ready to speak now?”
Kamaria went into the room with timid steps, walking through the framed paintings on the wall and the grand piano as her fingers fiddled with the hem of her nightgown.
“Here, sit down.” Her mother gestured towards the other sofa. She sat there, her mind rehearsing the words she had prepared.
‘Come on. I can do it.’
After another deep breath, she finally spoke, “I wanted to talk about the marriage.” She blurted out.
“What about it?” Zahara arched her brow, “Have you finally realized this is a great decision after all?” A lopsided smile emerges on her face, Zahara's heart hammering widely in her chest at the next response she might receive.
Kamaria gulped, “No… it was quite the contrary.”
The smile on Zahara's face dispersed as she waited for her daughter to elaborate. Kamaria halted her breath, listened to her heartbeat, and gathered the courage to finally meet her mother's dark brown eyes.
"I've met Abiel at the debutante, as you and grandmother had suggested. We've talked. He wasn't my type, Mother." she halted, unsure how her mother may react if she told her how she truly felt about Abiel.
The guy was— the worst kind of man she had ever met.
And that guy just had to be the future Duke of Camlann.
"So, I'm wondering whether we can—"
"We're not cutting off this engagement," Zahara spoke with distinction. She didn't wait for Kamaria to finish to know what was going on, "What your type of man is and the one who you will marry differs a lot for many people. There are a lot of things riding on this marriage, Kamaria. What do you think the Shields family would perceive us if our daughter broke off the engagement like that? It'll be a humiliation to our family. I'm not handing my daughter to just anyone; this is the Shields family we're talking about. We have thought about this very thoroughly and it's a great chance for you to have a bright future; you should have some maturity and accept this. This is for your good, Kamaria."
As her mother's words sunk in, Kamaria realized there wasn't room for negotiation at all. Her future was set in stone, and she had no say in anything.
"I understand, Mother." Her voice was only a few notches above a whisper, gaining a nod from Zahara.
"Now, it's late. You shall go back to your room, there's a long day waiting for us tomorrow." Nodding slightly, Kamaria stood up and left, the weight of how this conversation had turned outbound her like metal chains. There was nothing that eased her heavy heart. No one listens to her sorrows.
It was only her, the night wind, and her hot tears.
...
Tears cascaded down her dark brown cheeks and hitched sobs escaped her throat as she tore through the summer breeze as fast as her feet could bring her. People, buildings, and sceneries were reduced to blurs that didn’t bother to interact with her.
Her hands gripped the hems of her nightgown, Kamaria didn’t care whether her lungs started to hurt, she just kept running. The minute her mother had retired to her bedroom, Kamaria waited for thirty minutes, making sure the older woman was fast asleep before she made her escape. As her body was strained from running, her mind was elsewhere.
The engagement between her and Abiel.
It wasn’t only about her and Abiel, most marriages in the upper crust of society are like that. It’s about the De La Cruz and Shields family, not the individuals
The young man hasn’t proposed to her yet.
Kamaria wished he would never do it.
Ever since the debutante, fear had been lingering in her heart. Fear that the engagement would be announced at her birthday party. Fear that at the next moment, her mother would tell her the exact date of the marriage. Fear that she would never be able to escape this for the rest of her life.
For now, this matter was still kept under wraps. Only those who were involved in both families were aware. But what about tomorrow? What about the day after that?
The whole world might know of this soon, and by then, there would be no way out of it anymore. Weddings in Camlann were a big deal. Unlike the lower class, they were extravagant and serious, which took months of planning beforehand and rehearsals of the bride and groom, respectively. However, regarding this supposedly ‘sacred’ event, who in the upper-crust society doesn’t know that it’s no more than a political tool?
Love?
What’s that?
Kamaria knew about this. She knew that the feelings of two youngsters were a cheap price to pay for the benefits that would come from strengthening the bond between two noble families. This is the norm. She knew she couldn’t be free as the commoners were, it’s a common fact.
Yet she never liked it to be that way.
She never, and never wanted to accept this norm.
After the conversation she had with Jesenia, she had hoped her mother would at least listen to her side of the story of what happened during the debutante. She hoped that her mother would be different. However, the minute Kamaria talked about her discontentment, the older woman shot her down, claiming Abiel was such a good man with a promising future and that she shouldn’t be too dramatic.
In the end, her mother was just another nobility…
This wasn’t the life she had dreamed of living when she first arrived at Camlann as a child. After moving here, Kamaria was expected to go to school like most children her age, and then learn about life, meet new friends, and have adventures, and she hoped to possibly reunite with her old friends at her birthday party and find true love.
She was forced to marry a young man with no regard for what she felt. Not only did her bruises hurt, but her heart broke into two pieces.
How can her mother, of all people, not listen to her daughter’s needs and desires?
A chuckle escaped Kamaria’s lips at that thought. The sense of pain, anger, sadness, disappointment, and ridicule all mixed into a single chuckle. Another pearl of tear slid down as her gaze turned up towards the starry sky.
‘Dad…wherever you are, please just hear me out. Please help me. What am I even supposed to do now? I don’t want to relent to them, I don’t! But I’m powerless. No one listened to me, let alone compromise. Not even Mom. I have no one on my side.’
Kamaria’s silent pleas were left unheard, just like her voiced arguments and helpless feelings.
She had a thought though.
'If I can't get what I want, then those forceful people shouldn't get what they want either…'
How?
It was simple.
'I just have to die.'
Rocks and gravel crunched underneath the soles of her frilly socks, and her gaze kept firmly on the rusty Old Galahad Bridge, which had been forgotten over the years. The structure stood tall above a river, with trapezoid arch beams supporting it to stand up over the water. It was a rusty red color, and having not been checked up on a lot, the paint itself began to fade away over time.
It was quite contrast to the glimmers of the city, the buildings reaching upwards to the nighttime sky, and beams of light ignited the entire town in its warm glow. She loathes the idea of marrying the guy simply for her safety and protection. It was quite naive of her, she knew. Alas, she only listened to her crying heart.
Sure, she was powerless to defend herself from him, but could it be because she was simply afraid of him? No, it was more than that.
She cared about her family, she cared about her mother. Nothing could change that fact.
Kamaria finally broke her gaze from the sky and sniffed, lifting her arm and wiping the remnant tears off of her face.
The night wind wasn't cold, but at this moment, she felt sharp coldness piercing her skin.
She swallowed, her hands rubbing up and down her shoulders as she contemplated what to do. Kamaria couldn’t take it anymore; as much as she had a whole life ahead of her, she felt that she could never follow the dreams she had planned out because of her mother and the Shields family controlling her life and she hated it.
‘What’s the point? No one’s not even listening to me. I wonder if I'm even human in their eyes.’
Taking a tentative step forward, she placed one foot in front of the other, walking over to the bridge, already making up her mind. A wave of sadness washed over her, as she continued to lock her eyes with the old bridge, her mind already made up.
The minute she was near the wooden posts, Kamaria once again swallowed, and her breath caught in her throat.
'Is this the right way though? Should I do this?'
She exhaled in and out, resting her palms on the ledges. She felt the stinging sensation of something sharp piercing through her palm, letting go of the handrails, and looked down at her bleeding palm.
‘At least there won’t be any pain and suffering in the afterlife.’
Ignoring her bleeding hand, Kamaria rested both hands on the bridge again, doing her best to fight off the pain in her palm. She bit down on her lip, hard, as she lifted her foot and rested it on the ledge, followed by the other. However, her eyes soon met the murky waters below. Her heart thudded in her chest, and sweat trickled down her face.
'How menacing…'
The waters.
She was going to do it. After so many years, she was finally going to reunite with her father.
Would he be happy to see her with him amongst the stars? Or would he encourage her to live life to the fullest and follow her heart?
Her hands trembled, but something was fighting for her to stay on the bridge and not jump, though another part of her encouraged her to do it.
Sucking up her fear, Kamaria turned around, swinging her legs over the banister, ignoring the deep waters below her. She couldn’t believe this was happening to her of all nights.
Not now.
Don’t do it, Kamaria.
A mysterious voice rang from the distance, and a gasp escaped from her throat as she turned around and the night breeze brushed through the leaves of the trees.
'I may just be hearing things…'
But the voice went on, chanting in her ears.
Don’t do it.
Don’t do it.
Don’t do it.
Kamaria found the strength to pull herself up, her arm going over the banister, trying to crawl herself upwards, but her dark brown eyes glanced up and soon locked eyes with a mysterious cloaked figure dressed in all black, their face perfectly hidden beneath the shadows. Her irises shrunk and her mouth hung open as she kept her gaze on the stranger before her. Her chest tightened, knowing something was wrong.
"Why are you hesitating, Kamaria?"
The mysterious figure's voice was soft. As if a mother comforting her daughter after a long harsh day.
But Kamaria felt fear throughout her entire body.
Humans and animals, both have a huge desire to live. This is why, in the moments of life and death, some could bring out their hidden potential and go beyond the normal limits of their race. It is also why they would feel fear and a strong urge to struggle and run away, all for the sake of survival. They could feel death nearing on an instinctual level.
And this was too, something instinctual.
At this moment, Kamaria didn't even need to see the figure's face, nor the weapon they held firmly in their grasp to feel intense fear surging up inside of her. Their very existence was enough.
“It’s not worth living here anymore, Kamaria. Isn't that how you feel?" The stranger's honeyed voice continued, "Don't you want to feel less pain?” they asked, stepping closer to the girl, his voice making her shudder in response.
Kamaria's feet shuffled backward in reflex.
"Go on, Kamaria." They encouraged.
"Do you want to let yourself be chained by those people who don't care about you? Can you let that be?" They threatened.
"Kamaria. Don't you want to meet your father again?" They tempted.
With another step, they forced Kamaria back to the banister.
With yet another step, they forced Kamaria to shrink back even further.
Their voice was still as sweet as ever. As if an apple offered by the devil.
With much force, the mysterious figure pushed Kamaria down to the depths below, their shrill laughter booming, until a twig snapped in the distance, forcing them to flee for their lives, their cape billowed behind them.