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Let Him Cry

He stared at me with bewilderment. I don’t have omniscience, but what I do have is a keen skill of insight and good eyes. I can read people like a book. Emanuel is either hyper-focused on his next meal as his stomach grunts throughout his story. At first, I thought it was the rat's stomach floating in me. The rumbling is still there after I spit him out and hurried away, probably to tell his rodent friends how he survived a god. I’m fine, on the other hand, still full from earlier. There's no need to eat the rat inside of me this time.

A second option could be reliving the events he told could have put him in a dark space. It makes sense; I understand the pain of losing people close to you. Commands, friends, shipmates, I've lost it all. Family, on the other hand, I don’t think I can understand how he feels. The pain laced in his words, the way his words trembled when he spoke, and the few breaks were stopped because he was crying. The pain fester in his heart.

The pain is part of the reason the mood shifted. His thoughts are as clear as the rat that was in me. My response to his story was what did it.

“I told you everything, and you want me to… to forgive Crane?” he shouts as he stomps the floor, his eyes watering with sorrow and rage.

“I never said forgive. I said not to seek revenge.” My words are stready. I need to keep them steady. This is not the time for me to be lost in emotion.

“Then what do I do then? Do I just wither away?” He grips his chest as if his face goes red. The rats look out from their hole to see whose stomps shake their home. I don’t stop him. This makes sense; he must let it out like I did when I floated alone on the rocks. He needs to be released. “Want me to cry until I feel even more empty and just hope one day, maybe one day, I won't feel so bad?”

“You run, for now.”

He stared at me, caught off guard. “That’s for cowards.”

“Cowards live. They get a tomorrow. A tomorrow to see the sunrise, to breathe,” My eyes stare deep into his. “To plot.”

His eyes jumped back at me when he heard the last sentence. I continue to speak now, gaining his attention.

“You’re a kid. Seeking revenge for what happened to you is understandable. Do it now. Well, you saw what happened on the street. Wait until you are older and stronger. Then go on your blood-soaked quest, but do so knowing this detail. Revenge reaps revenge. Blood trapped in snow only sports when it melts.

He doesn’t respond. I stand up and walk to the window. My eyes search once more for anyone trying to find us. I continue to speak, knowing he is staring at me.

“You finish him off, and you take his place. Whether you feel satisfied or not, you won’t know until the deed is done—not even right away. That spot you left, though, won’t stay empty for long. Someone just like you will stand there, looking at you.”

Emanuel is quiet. He looked down at his hands. I won’t pretend to know what he is thinking. He is a kid with the weight of his family’s bodies on his back. Their blood drips down your face and paints your vision. Survivor guilt can lead you adrift into the dark.

When I was lost, I wished for a hand to reach out and pierce the dark, to guide me down the right path and save me from the embrace of solitude. It was then that I realized one duty of a god. If I wasn’t given a guide through life, then that means I am a guide to others the best I can. Especially a lost kid like him.

I look up and see a dark blue sky with a light dusting of stars. The city light obscures the colors of the Conscious Sea, but I remember them. One of the only good things about being adrift in space is that the sights and colors you see with say with you.

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“If I could get you out of this city, would you take my offer?” I say, turning back to him.

“I would need to get off the rock. Crane’s reach extends all around Bronxen. Even if I were to hide in one of the very few towns left, he’d find me,” he says, looking under the bed, deep into the shadows.

I look back up to the stars as the idea hits me. I was already planning this for myself. What's one more person? “Then we will get you off this rock. Let’s get on a ship.”

Emanuel turns out to be e surprised. His gaze then shifts up. The sparkle of the stars reflects in his eyes. The idea of sailing the cosmos must never crossed his mind. It makes sense, as his whole life and future were on Bronxvan. Although they specialized in interstellar trade routes, his future was planted in the dirt.

“He won’t let any ship take us,” Emanuel says. “He controls the loans to all of the ships and docks. They won’t cross him.”

“We can stow away.”

“A god stowing away?”

“We can steal a ship.” I turned to see his mouth gaping and his eyes widening. It’s clear he didn’t see my suggestion coming.

“I thought you said you were a god?”

“I am!” My calm demeanor wanes.

“What kind of god steals? Can’t you miracle us out? Don’t you know a spell or anything?”

I… don’t know how to use magic.” I did my best to avoid this subject as it is the most embarresing.

“Wizards can bend the fabric of reality, but they’re not a god.” Emanuel’s tone starts to rise. “Druids commune with nature, but they’re not gods. I’ve heard stories of people moving mountains with their bare hands and creating planes, but they’re not gods. But because you are slime and stretch, you are a god?” He shouts out.

“I can also change my shape a bit!” I yell back.

“Thats DUMB!”

“No, it's useful! I am one of a kind, never-before-seen person. If I am not a god, what am I?” The boy is silent. I stretch my head to be next to his. “Oh, is the little baby at a loss for words?”

“I’ll kill you!” He shouts back.

“Ha! I can’t die.”

“You just said you could earlier!” Crap. the kid’s right. I did say that.

”Well, it takes a lot.” We went back and forth, bickering, which eventually devolved into him taking a well-deserved 10 hours of sleep. The boy needed it. Once he woke up, we devised a plan. In this city, there are a few ways we can get a Solar Sail, the only class of ship that can take us to the stars.

They resemble sea vessels but are equipped with the newest advances in magic and science. The ships have a series of spells that magically create barriers around the vessels that act as a miniature atmosphere so people can breathe and not get sucked into space. Can’t forget the sails adorned with a series of spells woven into every thread to catch solar radiation and the magical energy that composes the universe, the Source, to push the vessel forward, and the thrusters on the back to get it a bit of extra power.

If we want to get a small ship meant for family trips, you get them at dealerships like “Smiths Super Solar Ships” or secondhand. This would work best as we wouldn’t have to check in with any ports to leave and could leave at any time with low deductions. The issue is we don’t have money.

Next are the larger commercial ships. The issue there is Crane. With his iron grip on those ships, we would need to find a way to slip past him, grab one, and dip. The ports are at the edge of the town at the end of the floating rock. If you take one wrong step, you can end up floating into space and driving to the Conscious Sea. IU didn’t breed Emanuel as he needed his rest. Plus, if I leave my clothes in the room, I can sneak around and slither and sneak around with no problem.

The port is large with mutiple hanger holding the Solar Sails. Most hangars have the corporation’s name on them. I catch Emanuel’s family hangar. The doors locked and the area unetternd. It doesn’t matter who name is on the hangar, they all belong to Crane.

I stay to see a Solar Sail take off, and it always sparks beauty. A ship is pulled out off an iron cart with wheels from the hanger. It's large, one used to transport goods, with cargo and crew on board. The sails unravel and glow with a violet-pink light. The ship rises from the certifying into the air. It moves forward as waves of multicolored light part under the keel. The green light hits, and the thrusters boom. The ship flies forward and off the edge. The Light waves grow as the Solar Sail takes off into the cosmos and the stars, riding a current of ethereal light.

Security there is the tightest I have seen. You can’t even walk in the parking lot without a pass. I can sneak in no problem, but Emanuel… I mean, who sneaks up to stab a guy by running at them and yelling their name?

But we have a backup plan.

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