I felt the warm sun on my face. For a second, I was back in the country. I could hear the birds and the bubbling brook. I could smell the fresh cut grass. I smiled at the warm memories. These rare moments of peace were the only thing that kept me going. Without them I would be lost. I wished I could keep my eyes closed forever and forget the world. But I couldn’t. So, as I opened my eyes the grim reality came crashing back. I was sitting on a cold stone bench inside the empty concrete courtyard of the hospital, with not even a potted plant to add a splash of color. I could even see myself in the window across the way. My once full blonde hair hung limply and flat. My cheeks had sunken in and I looked frail, like a strong wind would snap me. I placed my hand on the bench and struggled to stand up. I was getting weaker every day, but I wasn’t about to let that slow me down. If I just gave up what was the point?

“Marilynn! Dear, you shouldn’t be out here.” A nurse had come over with a concerned look on her face. She draped her arm around my shoulders and began guiding me back inside. “You have to stay inside ok? Or you’ll never get better.” I didn’t resist as I was ushered inside. I knew they were just looking out for me, but it was so frustrating. I used to be able to run and play, but now I was just shuffled from place to place. The nurse shepherded me into the bed. “Now you stay here ok? No more wandering off.”

I laughed sadly to myself. It wasn’t like I had enough energy to wander out of bed again anyway. So, I resigned myself to the boredom that awaited me. I reached over for the remote, might as well put on something to drone out the bustle. As I was turned, I heard the door creak open and shut quietly. I looked back. “Elizabeth!” I called out happily. “What are you doing here?” She was also a patient here. I didn’t know too much about her besides that looked about my age, but healthier. Her hair was a beautiful brown and silky to the touch. She was my only friend here.

“Shhhh.” She shushed me as she walked over to the bed. “I’m not supposed to be here.” She knelt next to my bed and held my hand. “So, I heard you snuck out today?”

I laughed for a moment before bursting into a coughing fit. After it subsided I smiled a little. “Yeah. I made it to the courtyard and got to be there a few minutes before a nurse caught me.”

She gave my hand a squeeze. “I’m glad you got to go outside I know how much you miss it. Just don’t stress yourself out too much ok? You need to get better, so we can leave here together. Ok?” I nodded, and she smiled, her hazel eyes glittering. “Good.” She squeezed my hand again. “I brought a movie!” She held up a case before standing up to go put it in. “It has action, adventure, true love, you name it!” She put it in before coming back over. “Now scoot.” She gestured at me to move.

“Wha-what? I can’t!”

She placed her hands on her hips and looked at me disapprovingly. “I can see you’re not all hooked up, so you can. Now move over.” I laughed a little and wiggled over, allowing her to climb into the bed. She took the remote and pressed play. I smiled as we watched, leaning my head on her shoulder. These were my favorite moments. Elizabeth treated me like I was alive and living, not just surviving. I closed my eyes. I wish this could go on forever.

It had been like this for almost a year. I had already been in the hospital for years at that point, but Elizabeth was new. She was so scared. So, like she was doing for me now, I would sneak over into her room and bring something. Sometimes a movie, other times a game, but always something to distract her from reality. As time went on she slowly improved, engaging more. The doctors and nurses encouraged our interaction, letting us play together more often, but also scolding us when we went where we weren’t supposed to.

I always looked forward to the next day with her around. She was such a bundle of joy that being around her lifted my spirits. With her around I felt that even I could recover. Then one day I couldn’t get out of bed easily. I struggled to stand. At that point she took the role I had originally played. While I was trapped and struggling she would bring movies and games. She would tell stories of her family, of her brother and sister.

She wanted me to join her once we were both out. She told me she talked about me all the time to her parents when they visited. I was glad she had a good family. Some of my favorite moments with her though were when she snuck out of her room at night and slept with me. It made the dark, cold room warm and vibrant. She always told me, “We’ll make it out. Together.” She truly was the light of the hospital.

Then for a month it stopped. I had taken a huge turn for the worse, causing the hospital to put me on lockdown. She couldn’t even see me. I felt hopeless and more trapped than ever. At least in the past when I had been bedridden she had been able to see me. I felt weaker and weaker, and then I was visited by a new doctor. He looked younger than the previous doctors. He had short black hair and green eyes. He talked for a moment, something about not giving up hope. Then he placed two things on my lap. There was a static noise and then…

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“Red Leader, this is Gold Leader.”

I laughed, rising from my funk. I picked up the walkie talkie. “I copy, Gold Leader.”

A laugh came over the walkie talkie. “You holding up ok?”

“A lot better than I was now that I have this.” I grinned. “What’s this other thing?” I picked it up, it was a tablet, and it was open to an app and through it I could see…

“Hello!” Elizabeth waved at me through the camera. “You like the new toy?”

I looked over the tablet, it appeared to have some control systems. I pressed a few of the buttons and the camera moved back and forth, wobbling.

“Careful now, the hospital only has one of these and we can’t break it.” She smiled as I finally understood what was going on. She had gotten a remote-controlled car so that we could keep playing together. The next few days went by fast. We played games like hide-and-seek, which was a lot easier for me than her. We even watched movies, talking to each other through the walkie talkies. Slowly but surely, I improved and soon I was able to see her again.

She was a little different, skinnier, but she still had her bright disposition. The first thing she did was hug me tightly. She felt a little weaker than before, but I didn’t care. I hugged her back as tightly as I could. The next few days were a blur. We played a few board games and even a few video games that the hospital had access to. We even read each other books, taking turns reading chapters. Those few days were filled with joy, though there was a dark cloud. She kept getting skinnier and skinnier. Her smile never faded, but it seemed to be covering pain. Whenever I asked her about it though she brushed it off, saying that it was nothing.

She got better after a while and I started to improve as well. Eventually I was actually able to get out of bed, though the nurse still wouldn’t let me leave the room, though that didn’t stop me from sneaking out to the courtyard for even just a minute of fresh air. Elizabeth would visit me when she could, bringing along the movies and games.

But then, one day, she didn’t come in. I asked the nurses, but no one would answer me. The doctors avoided the question, always asking how I was doing, refusing to even acknowledge my questions. She wasn’t even answering the walkie talkie. A day went by, and then another. Still she hadn’t come. After the second day I was determined. Tomorrow I would find out. Tomorrow.

The next morning, I struggled out of bed. It hurt to stand, but I couldn’t let that stop me. Bracing myself on the wall I made my way to the door and opened it, heading down the corridor to her room. Each step hurt, but I was determined. At the same time, I was also scared. I knew that nothing normal could have kept her from visiting. She even promised to keep stopping by after she got out. So, I gritted my teeth and kept pushing.

I eventually made it to the door and pushed it open. It squeaked, and I shambled in, bracing myself where I could. I looked at the bed and my breath got caught in my throat, causing me to cough. There she was. Her hair was gone, and she looked even weaker than me. Tears welled up in my eyes as I stumbled over to her. I fell to my knees beside her and took her hand, squeezing it.

“Hey…” I looked up at the quiet whisper. There she was, her eyes glimmering and that warm smile still on her face. “You shouldn’t be here, you’re sick.”

“So are you,” I said choking back my tears. “You’re sick too.”

She just continued to smile and gave my hand a weak squeeze. “It’ll be alright Marilynn. I promise. You’re going to be fine. You will make it out of here.”

“What about you?” I couldn’t keep the tears back any longer. “What about you? You promised we’d make it out together.”

She shook her head, and I could see the sadness finally breaking through. “I can’t make it out. I can tell by the way they act; how careful they are with their words.” She squeezed my hand again. “I can’t keep my promise.”

“No! You can, and you will!” I forced myself up and hugged her close. “I can’t lose you! I can’t…” I felt her tears as she weakly hugged me back. “I’ll keep coming back every single day until you get better no matter what. I promise.”

“Thank you, Marilynn.” I heard the sadness mixed with the happiness in her voice.

I leaned back, and felt my legs give out, causing me to fall on the floor. I heard her gasp and her shifting. “I’m fine! Honest!” She stopped just as she was able to look over to see me.

“Hey now, don’t hurt yourself for me ok? I just want you to be ok.”

“I won’t, promise.” We laughed as the nurses came in, alerted by my fall. They took me away, but I could see Elizabeth smiling, and everything was worth it. She was going to be fine. I knew it.

The next week I was there for her. Not even the nurses could keep me out. I read her books and even sang her songs, though we both laughed at how bad I was. Then one night the doctor who had given me the walkie talkie returned. He had with him a wheelchair.

“Marilynn, please come with me.” He had a solemn look on his face that frightened me.

I nodded and got into the chair as he wheeled me to Elizabeth’s room. She looked frighteningly weak. She hadn’t gotten any better. He wheeled me next to her and left, closing the door quietly. I looked at her face, the light seemed to be leaving her eyes.

“Elizabeth… are you?”

She held out her hand and I took it.

“I’m sorry I couldn’t keep my promise.”

“What do you mean? You’ve kept it! You’re here!”

Her smile was weak. “I’m fading. They told me I wouldn’t make it through the night.”

“No! You’ll make it! You have to!”

She looked at me with her sad smile. “I can’t go on. I no longer have the strength. Thank you for being here for me. You truly are an angel.”

“No, that’s not true.” I shook my head, holding back the tears as best I could. “You are the angel. You are the reason I have made it so far.”

“You will keep making it, I know it. I will always be here for you.” She beckoned me closer. I leaned in as close as I could. She gathered enough energy to move forward and kiss me. “Thank you for making this year the best.” She leaned back and closed her eyes. I felt her hand go limp and could no longer hold back the tears. I was still crying when the nurses took me back to my room.