It’s only me in a small and dark room with four corners. Illuminating my face was the light emanating from a computer monitor. I have been holed up in my room for who knows how long, but as for me, it felt like hours, fun, swift hours.

In that room is an entirely new world. Every colorful pixel gave me a purpose in living. I have dropped out of school to pursue my passion for writing, but my parents were against it. Fortunately, they weren’t that strict as to eject me out of the house. They were the kindest people I have ever known, and I loved them for it.

But I still won’t give in to their request. I may have been what people called, a ‘NEET,’ which gave me a bad impression no matter how it was sliced. My parents tried to persuade me from it, but I, in turn, tried to convince them of my chances of success. In the end, they shook their heads in disappointment and left me be.

Some of my friends— fine, a few of my friends— fine! I had only one friend! And he— oh would you shut up? I am confident that he is my friend, not an acquaintance! Anyway, he once came over to my house to visit me in my den, trying to dissuade me from chasing my ‘delusions’ any further, but I turned him down.

“It’s for my family,” I said.

“But by it, you’re making your parents suffer,” he said.

I am thankful for a friend like him. Even though I did not attend school anymore, he frequently visited me when he is off from his other circles of friends. I swear, I am not jealous, and if I would be, I’d still be equally grateful. He made my life a little bit lighter, a little bit easier to bear. We played games, chatted, joked, pranked, and ate together. I could have called him brother if he allowed me to, but he seems to have a complex against siblings, though he has an older sister. I wished I had a sibling, but thank goodness, I didn't. It would have made life harder for them.

Even so, I pushed against the flow of life, because it once pushed against me before, and almost drowned me.

***

I was in high school before. I dropped out not only because of my goal. I had to leave that school for I couldn’t tolerate the disdain upon me any longer. They condemned me because of something I did. One that shook the pillars of my judgment.

But I shall recall the story, in the off-chance that I would receive any sympathy.

I have found out that half of my entire class has been cheating, and not only in that current school year, but also in the past year. And the righteous I tried to sermon them and threatened to report them to the faculties, but somehow, they turned the tide against me. Instead, they accused me of doing what they have done, even placing me as the mastermind of the act. Though they craftily admitted to the crime, they were punished lightly while I took the brunt. I had a pint of mercy on them, for I didn’t immediately report them to the teachers. I toiled and regretted that decision, and I was conscience-stricken. I should have divulged earlier.

I was suspended for two months, missing most of that quarter. And in that time, I found the grail of escapism through writing.

When I returned after my suspension was lifted, the people who didn’t know the full story denounced me of chicaning, while those whom I accused jeered. The teachers who I hoped would take my side and intervene, instead, watched from afar with cold eyes.

It hurts, my heart.

***

But right now, I can put my ideas into words onto a screen. Words that can be made into pages, then into a book. A book that may be soon shared across the world.

I type away at my dusting keyboard. Tainted by chips and the grime of my hands. But I do clean it after every writing session, trust me. The book I was writing at this moment is titled The Hero Is Extravagantly Rich but Severely Thrifty. I know it’s a ridiculous book when I started writing it. It is supposed to narrate a shadow of my ideals onto a female protagonist. At the same time, it was the life I have wished for. Being rich and free, unbound by the cares of life, and being the main character of your life. The complete opposite of my situation.

You could be reading stolen content. Head to Royal Road for the genuine story.

My family’s financial situation has been dipping below average ever since my last school year and is now starting to plummet to my new NEET lifestyle. My parents were barely able to afford my tuition that year. I know that I look like a jerk for dropping out and wasting my parents' efforts, but it would be more of a waste to continue studying in that school of horror.

***

But at this moment, an opportunity came a golden one. One that will not only change my life but also make it easier for my parents. It’s my chance to bring them pure joy and a genuine smile on their faces, instead of a pained and dull smile that always pierced me when I saw it. That opportunity was to become a published author.

Notified through an email, a certain person from a well-known publishing company finally got to see one of my many web novels. I have written many that I couldn’t count, and many more that I couldn’t publish, most of them discontinued. They offered me to turn this into a light novel, and hopefully, into a manga. But alas, something impeded my way to success, a train ride to Tokyo.

Fortunately, they were kind enough to compensate for my two-way fare, just not in the fancy Shinkansen, of course, as I expected. They wouldn’t dare to spend that much on a stranger from a shady background. It was an unsure investment from a business standpoint, and I understood that, even though I never owned a business. It’s just the poor’s mindset.

And now, I’m on this fancy train— please allow me to call it fancy. I have never ridden on a train before this. I mostly only walked the walking distance to my school and the convenience stores nearby, my only two destinations other than my home. I avoid commuting as much as possible to save much of my lunch money, but half of the time, I would proceed throughout the day without lunch, as my parents apologize to me for not being able to provide me with anything. It pained my soul. You don’t have to apologize to me. I wish I could have done something, something better.

And that better is now!

***

Being in the crowded station is terrifying, and I had only two minutes to get through the rushing crowds before my train ride leaves the station. This was my first time riding a train, especially this far.

I heard an announcement, “Train is now boarding,”

“That’s my train to Tokyo,” I happily mumbled as I hold my ticket to success. Wait, I’m still holding my ticket. I need to get past those gates!

But something stops me. Those metal gates. Wait, how do you get through this thing? I examined the metal post that has some kind of slit on top of it. Then an impatient passenger yelled from behind me.

“Excuse me! Please don’t block the gateway,” a man in a hastily worn suit gestures me to move.

It seems like he works in Tokyo and lives here, but it’s already late in the noon. Is he late, or slacking off? I let him pass by and noticed him place his wallet on top of the surface, and the metal gate revolved to let him in. I wonder where to get those things. Those seem convenient.

I figured that I have to insert my ticket into the slip. Once I do, I receive a stub with my car and seat number. I feel so dumb.

I barely made it in time before the doors closed, and a train conductor reminded me to be seated. I glanced at my ticket stub which indicated where I would be seating. “Ah, over here,” I am lucky enough to be seating at by the window as the train starts to accelerate. I place my duffel and laptop bag at my front, but the conductor reminds me to place them in the baggage compartment above me. Man, hopefully, I don’t have to pay for the baggage fee. I packed light just for this.

The wheels made a soft creaking sound as they rubbed against the rails, and a gentle pushing motion sent me into the seat. I looked toward the window to see the station leaving the frame. The train’s engine made a gentle, whirring sound that was increasing in intensity. The view blurred as the scenery passed by quicker.

The panorama of my hometown withdraws as the train entered a tunnel. Agh, man, no signal in here. I bring out my laptop from one of my few items of baggage and my phone planning to use it as a Ri-fi hotspot, but the network wouldn’t connect since I am underground. I impatiently wait for the train to exit the tunnel as I press the power button on my laptop. Come on, power on already. It took forty seconds before my laptop finally powers on. And the light comes rushing into my window. Dang, in that much time, the train passes the tunnel. Well, it’s perfect timing. The signal is returning. I sighed.

But I halt myself in the operation of connection as I get absorbed into the glorious scene at my window. I gasped in awe as I admired the shimmering sea, or ocean, that emerged into view. I realized that the train is on a bridge, and thus slowed down following its ‘traffic rules,’ allowing me to spend more time cherishing the view.

Well, that’s enough of that. Time to get back to work. I check for my manuscript inside the word processor to confirm that it is saved. Then I checked the first twenty printed pages of my manuscript. Yosh, all good and set. Now I shall hand over my fate to luck. If it gets rejected, it would be all over.

Then I see something that would make it all over.