Aedifex stood before one of the newest and best maintained buildings in Agrestis... that was also a total wreck. It probably had something to do with the bar taking up half the ground floor. Really, what moron had thought getting adventurers drunk was a good idea? Well, Aedifex wasn’t the one paying the repair bill, so he’d just avoid that section.
In the dingy soot stained reception area, behind a desk that seemed to have been attacked with a battle axe at some point, stood the single receptionist. A middle-aged brute of a man, wearing a sleeveless shirt to show off his thick heavily scarred arms. Good, at least someone at the Adventurers Guild had some common sense. He shuddered to think what might have happened to an attractive woman forced to deal with groups of disreputable warriors all day. Now if only the man would stop glaring at him.
“Hello good sir, I would like to register as an Adventurer.”
“Oh you would, would you?”
Wow, this new glare actually makes the old one seem soft, I didn’t think that was possible.
“I don’t believe there are any special requirements?”
“Oh you don’t, do you?”
This guy needs a larger vocabulary. Oh? The glare stopped, but I don’t think I like that smile any better.
“Of course, good sir. Anyone can join, just as long as you pass the background check.”
He gestures to a glass sphere on the desk.
“And just what is this.”
“This orb will check to see if you’ve committed any major crimes before. If you have it will glow red, if you haven’t, blue.”
Aedifex glared suspiciously at the “orb”, or at least tried to project a suspicious aura. Even if he’d still had eyes to narrow, everything was hidden behind the mask, so it was a fail. Holding his hand near the ball he briefly examined it with his Sense. As he’d thought, it was a fairly cheep glass ball, with as enchantment similar to those sham items that glowed but did nothing. This one was a bit more complicated though.
“As it happens, I know a little about enchantments, but I’ve never heard of such a convenient enchantment as reading someone’s past.”
“Oh you haven’t, have you? Well... if the orb isn’t real then there’s no harm touching it, is there?”
“Oh it’s enchanted alright, but unless I’m mistaken its only enchanted to glow blue when touched. Though perhaps it would glow red if someone pressed... that little button your finger is hovering over?”
“Don’t be paranoid sir. Now, I’m afraid the background check is required, my good sir, so unless you change your mind about joining the Adventurers Guild...”
Aedifex just stared silently stared at him for a while (though again, it was wasted because of the mask), before silently placing one mana charged finger on top of the ball.
“Oh look, it’s blue.”
“Hero take it! Why... wont... it...”
He gives up his useless jabbing at the button to give Aedifex a truly terrifying glare. It was so intense Aedifex’s imagined it could peel the paint off his mask, he actually checked with his Sense, briefly, to make sure it was still intact.
“You. Just what did you do to my orb!?”
“Don’t be paranoid sir. Now, I’m betting that if it turns blue you’re required to admit me, right?”
After all, since the orb was a fake to begin with, the rules wouldn’t alow anyone to demand it be inspected, would it? The surly sir was obviously trying to glare even harder, but that previous glare just couldn’t be topped. Now he just looked like he was constipated.
“Yes... by order of the Hero-King, anyone who has not committed a major crime, verified by magic, may join the Adventurers Guild and receive an id plate. Even some obvious criminal who hides his face behind a mask painted like a face of all things!!!”
Several things become clear. The Hero-King gave an irresponsible order when he created the Adventurers Guild, and criminals had flocked to it as a way to get fake id. Given the sorry state of the Hero-Cursed Kingdom they definitely wouldn’t have records of criminals from other cities. He didn’t know where the Hero-King had gotten the idea that you could just use magic to check that, but someone had seized on it and made these fake orbs so the Guild would have an excuse to refuse suspicious characters. Otherwise, a criminal could just go from city to city getting a new id every time he was caught. In fact, if he hid his face he could probably get another id from the same exact guild house! With a jolt, Aedifex realized why the receptionist was so hostile towards him.
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“Um... is there anyway I could convince you I’m not a criminal.”
“Take off that mask!”
“...no.”
“Then no.”
They just glared at each other for a while. Aedifex honestly hadn’t thought there was anyone this dedicated and responsible left in this cursed kingdom. He guessed he should be glad and hopeful to meet him... but did he have to be the receptionist at this particular guild house? Uh oh, that nasty smile is back.
“Well, perhaps there is something. Since you handled the orb so well, you should have no problem with a Truth Rod?”
Curse it, those do exist. They can only tell true from false though, or rather what the person holding them thinks is true or false, but they were near impossible to fool unless you’re crazy, and worse, they’re all warded against magical tampering. On the other hand...
“Isn’t it illegal to make someone use one of those if your not a guardsman?”
“Oh, but I’m not making you, you’re volunteering.”
“And if I don’t ‘volunteer’ I’m not joining am I?”
“What are you talking about good sir? I’ll handle your request with all the care it deserves.”
Aedifex thought furiously for a few moments, before saying...
“I will only agree to 3 questions.”
With a smirk, Surly brought out a plain, but impeccably carved, rod of quartz crystal. A faint patina of age covered it, obviously a relic of better days in the kingdom. He wondered how it had wound up in the hands of a guild receptionist, but that didn’t really matter now. He reached out and grasped the rod.
--Surly POV--
“So, first question: Have you ever killed or robbed anyone?”
“I have killed people that tried to kill me first, and taken their possessions as loot.”
I make an unhappy grunt. Turning the tables on bandits and looting their bodies was a common way to make money for adventurers. Then again, if no one was around sometimes adventurers would turn bandit themselves and just say the other party attacked them, but the rod glowed blue. The colors were blue for true, red for false. The fake orbs used the same colors to trick people into thinking the two tools were similar. Wait... he never said those were the only people he killed did he?
“And have you killed anyone that didn’t attack you first?”
“No.”
Blue, I just wasted my second question. I start grinding my teeth, gota stop that or the healer will be nagging at me again. I wrack my brain trying to find the perfect question to trap this shady guy, but I end up just blurting the biggest thing bothering me.
“Why wont you show your face?”
“Well, I don’t have much of a face to show anymore.”
There’s so much wry bitterness in that I’d believe him even without the blue glow. Ah, Hero take it, have I been bullying some guy who got his face ruined by a fire or something?
--End POV--
Aedifex handed the rod back to the now guilty looking receptionist. That had been a risk, but with only 3 questions why would he think to ask “are you an undead?” as one of them? His biggest fear was being asked “what race are you?” Then again, acting evasive on that one might make people think he was just an elf or demon hiding himself because he was afraid of slavers.
After that, the now perfectly respectful and competent receptionist processed his application. Aedifex gave his real first name, no last name, as there was no reason for anyone to associate Aedifex the Spellsword with Aedifex the Enchanter who’d fled the kingdom 25 years ago. Actually, would anyone remember him at all? Probably not. Ah, depressed again.
25 silver? Oh, the entry fee. Aedifex shook himself awake and carefully counted out 25 silver, a bit tricky wearing gloves. At least there were no coppers. The base 100 currency system introduced by the Hero-King was regarded as one of the few good ideas he’d ever had, and had become popular even beyond the kingdom, but it took some annoyingly small copper pieces to make it work.
The receptionist finished making my id plate (an ordinary steel plate etched using an enchanted stylus) before asking:
“Will you be taking a job today?”
“Sure, what would be a normal first job for a spellsword?”
“Honestly... killing rats.”
“I’ll take that then.”
“Are you sure? The pay is only a copper per rat tail, and the best spots are mostly near broken sewer pipes.”
“That’s fine.”
Actually it was perfect for him. A normal adventurer would need to kill a hundred rats a day just to eat, and no way could he pay for an inn, but that wasn’t a problem for Aedifex and neither was the smell. Best of all, there should be no one around to see his first clumsy attempts at using a spear.
After receiving a crude city map with several red marks denoting rat infestations, Aedifex set off to kill rats.