Chapter 4

A new city

The city wasn't much of one, it was definitely stereotypical fantasy style but must have been mostly a trading hub. There were more inns and warehouses and caravan staging areas than I expected. There were some houses and shops and even a market, but the majority of businesses seemed to be centered around getting cargo from ships and onto roads, or vise versa.

Without whatever this place used as currency I didn't have much in the way of a plan, but I was just glad to be on land and not alone. While I walked I slowly adjusted my face and clothes to more closely match the people around me. The people were more attractive than back on Earth, not unnaturally so but there were very few overweight or obviously unhealthy people. Even the clearly outdoor workers like the merchants in the market and porters loading wagons all had clean smooth skin.

A building I didn't recognize the purpose for right away caught my attention. It was a large building, three stories based on the windows, and at least three times as wide as the inns and shops that otherwise occupied the street. People of all sorts were going in and out, and judging by the sounds it was only a sideways look from a bar brawl. People were shouting and hollering and a heavy aroma of alcohol lingered. It was hard to tell if it was mostly from the morning or the night before but there were definitely people stumbling out and it was quite early

I made my way inside where my suspicion was confirmed. The standard rpg adventure guild or whatever it was called here. One wall was a bulletin board presumably listing contracts or such, the opposite wall had a long counter with several employees talking to people, reminiscent of a bank's setup from earth, the third wall, opposite the entry door, was a regular bar with bartenders and all. Several tables covered the space between and the whole place was lively.

People were crowding all three of the services at each wall and the floor was standing room only. I imagined a fire marshal would have an aneurysm. I couldn’t tell where stairs would be the room was too crowded. Neither could I tell if this was the only room or if there were back areas. Well if I was stuck in another world then I would make the most of it. Time to be a fantasy adventurer.

I stopped one of the waitresses as she sped by, "Excuse me, do you have a restroom I can use?"

She frowned at me for a moment, "Are your parents around kid?"

Maybe if I kept lying someone would believe me sooner or later "yea my dad is over there" I pointed across the room vaguely, "restroom? Maybe soon or else you might want to grab a mop when you come back through"

Her face scrunched up in disgust, "The corner between the bar and the reception desks" and she sped off

Mission accomplished. I made my way through the crowd and found the restrooms. Thankfully there were several separate rooms with locking doors. Inside I found a piece of polished metal over a wash basin, something like a mirror, and what amounted to an outhouse seat, just a bench with a hole in it, at least they had paper. I looked into the polished metal mirror seeing my reflection for the first time in this world. I had to say my mostly blind face sculpting had been pretty successful. I had a slightly dirty face that was a mashup of several grubby kids I saw playing in the roads, Scraggly brown hair, and eyes of a similar color. My clothes were a rough tunic and trousers, I wasn’t sure if this was the norm or just what kids in the area played in but it matched fairly well with what I had seen.

My concern was that as I gained levels I would gain constitution and thus mass, if they kept records of who was doing what on the quests sudden extreme growth would be noticed sooner or later. I needed to change my shape to look older and larger. I wouldn't be able to counteract my growth but I could lower my density to gain size now and look like a large adult, then when I started getting too much mass, I would Increase density. This should give me some sort of window where I could be a real adventurer, and not raise much suspicion.

The next several minutes were spent warping and twisting my body and face. I ended up about Derek sized, though that size still might make people ask questions. I was going for realistic and I still wasn't sure he wasn't half troll or something. Being a good seven feet tall and wide enough that the proportions looked normal while still only weighing a hundred and thirty pounds or so was weird. I was now so hollow that I could eat my previous body and still have room. I kept most of my other looks, if I ran into the same waitress I could probably pose as the dad I had claimed was around somewhere. Walking was a new challenge as well. I worked I out a system where I could adjust my weight distribution on the fly to help keep my balance. The weird shifting center of gravity might have uses is combat later.

My next task was to begin my adventuring career. This sounded easier than it truly was. I wasn't sure if there was a license or something, or if I had to pick a contract and bring it to the reception area or what. Betting on the safest option I went and checked out the board of contracts.

My language skill was putting in work again as I found that looking at the writing I could see an English translation over the physical copy. I was able to focus on either one, like looking through a windshield or instead looking at a bug smear on it. The projected difficulty of the quests escalated the further toward the bar you went. Simple monster hunts and escorts were near the entrance. Manticore hunts and dungeon culls near the end. Beyond the top tier difficulty section was a special section of completely unknown difficulty. This section was absolutely packed with various forms of the same request, investigate a report of a strange occurrence.

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I would put good money that at least some of these had to do with the others who were supposedly also dumped on this world. At least I would if I had any money to bet with. The protocol when taking a contract seemed to be to pick one, memorize the reference number and then line up to inform the receptionists.

I was still unsure if I needed a permit or something, but I hadn't seen any yet. As I was searching for contracts I thought I might be able to manage and would pay for a place to sleep, I kept feeling eyes on me. Even being sneaky and sprouting extra eyes where no one could see them I couldn't spot anyone watching me though, so I ignored it. I chose a simple sounding contract, a herb harvest request, memorized the reference number, and lined up. The line was looong ridiculously so. This would take a while.

While I waited I adjusted my vocal cords to a deeper tone, no sense drawing attention with a tiny voice in a giant body, I would need some face tattoos and a tiger to pull that off. Checking the line and moving forward I then adjusted my weird balance ballast setup to shift a bit faster.

"Hello? Next!" The receptionist called out again, I hadn't noticed as I was swaying to test my new body's balance.

Snapping out of it I rushed to her desk, only stumbling twice, "ah shorreh, ah washnt payeen atenshun"

I blinked in confusion and rolled my jaw, I should have practiced my new voice and mouth as well.

"Can I help you?" She asked with a raised eyebrow.

The bank teller comparison from before was on point. She was the mold from which all stern librarians and disgruntled bank tellers were cast. Brown hair in a bun so tight it gave ME a migraine, glasses so far down her nose they couldn’t be usable, a permanent scowl had given her wrinkles that aged her otherwise early thirties face, and a nose just a bit too long and pointy.

"I hope sho, dis is the avenshur guild?" Slowly I was getting the hang of talking with my new setup.

"Yeah, I imagine you want the bar over there though, I don't expect they will serve someone this far gone" She didn’t even try to hide her disdain

"No no no, I wan to go on an adventure"

"You need to sleep off your drink before you can take a contract. For your safety we don’t allow anyone to take contracts while impaired"

Before I could respond something slammed my back causing me to nearly topple over the desk into the woman's lap.

"Now now, its alright Marge, we can take him with us to put down some goblins, we will make sure he stays safe" My grinning assailant nearly shouted.

She was a redhead decked out in armor, the armor was more medieval knight than fantasy adventurer, so I couldn't tell much about her. Only her head was exposed as she held her helmet under the arm she wasn’t trying to kill me with. She had ear length red hair, not orange but red. Blue eyes one of which must have been very close to being lost at one point if the scar that rose from her cheek to just below her left eye was anything to go by. Thinking about it, I hadn’t seen many scars and wondered how healing magic interacted with such things.

"My name is Margaret not Marge, and sending a drunk to fight goblins with you band of misfits is not how I want to lose my job, you know the rules"

"Aww comon, James quit on us and we need a front liner to fill out the team. We need to finish a contract today or we won't be able to afford our rooms."

“Riight, that’s a fine list of your problems, remind me why I care about any of that"

The loud redhead narrowed her eyes at Margaret, both women apparently forgetting I existed. "You wouldn’t want someone to spread rumors about last years harvest fest..."

"Great so you'll be joining Jessica's team for a goblin hunt Mr.?" Margret said in a tense voice carefully looking at me and not Jessica.

"What"

Margaret blinked"... goblins, you are going to hunt goblins with Jessica's team? We need your name for the paperwork"

"Yeah, my name is What"

She furrowed her brow in confusion, "That’s what I'm asking, what is your name?"

"Right”

"What?"

"Yeah"

Jessica spoke up "no sweetie tell her your name"

"What is my name"

"We don’t know, that’s why she’s asking"

"Huh, this really is difficult to get across... my name, the name people call me, if you want to get my attention in a crowded room you call out What"

Margaret squinted at me "your name is the word What?"

"Yes"

Stunned silence for a moment and then Jessica doubled over laughing, "How much did your parents hate you?"

Once everyone calmed down they got back to the paperwork. It was mostly simple things, age, emergency contacts, and class, which I didn't tell them was 'who' instead, as I was leaning into constitution, I guessed warrior would be a good lie. The paperwork settled, Jessica dragged me to a table near the quest board, where two more people were waiting.

"Who's this then?" grumbled a short man in robes.

He had glasses so thick it might be a challenge to classify them, maybe they were actually binoculars, a shaved head, and a sour look on his face. I wondered if he and Margaret were related, or perhaps just shared pointers on stern disapproving glares

Jessica rolled her eyes, "I did say I would find another front liner to protect you. This is What, he is a warrior specializing in defense"

The specialty of defense thing was news to me but it wasn't exactly wrong and I wanted to start adventuring so I stayed quiet.

A tall blonde with robes similar to the man's but hers clearly had armor plates sewn in sat at the table as well. She had piercing blue eyes but she never seemed to look directly at anyone, always to the side or down slightly.

She spoke next, "What? What do you mean, this is what? What's your name?"

"I know" I said now leaning into the joke

"Nope!" Jessica cut in, "it's all very amusing, and I love a good joke as much as the next girl but just nope, we need to get a move on. You are W now, Mr. W if you want to be fancy."

"Mr. W? Wait your name actually is What?" the fat guy said

"I said no, this is W, W this is Paul a fire mage, and Claire a cleric healer. We need to get moving, so we can get this hunt done in time to get paid and not get kicked out of the guild housing. Where's your gear W?"

"Mmm, I'll go get it, don't go anywhere." I hurried back to the restrooms before they could object or follow.

It was difficult to quickly come up with something that looked like adventurer armor and weapons while in a hurry. I had to thicken my skin into a leather, and sprout a couple wooden extensions on my arms, but I managed.

"Where were you hiding that stuff?" Claire asked as I made my way back to the table with my faux leather armor and helmet, and wooden club and shield.

"M-my room" I stuttered

"The rooms are up the stairs over there" She pointed to the other end of the room from the restrooms

"Doesn't matter we’re in a hurry, comon." Jessica saved me

Just like that I was off on my first adventure contract with my new party. My excitement was short lived as it took hours to trek out to where the goblins had made their home.