Richard was conflicted.
He felt in his bones that he was making the right call by inviting people into his protection, but he was almost frozen by the idea that he may need to fight to defend them. Ever since he saw his sister mutilated and witnessed civilization fall, he wished with all of his being to meet people once more, but he may have been naive.
Of course the first people he met would be being killed by other people he hadn’t yet. Why not? When has life ever been easy? He was fourteen when he was drafted, and all of his adult life was being beaten into the form of a killing machine.
He had an extreme predilection for mental magic, but it couldn’t be harnessed while humanity was fighting for life. In gentler times, he may have been taught as a truthseeker, a therapist, a detective, judge, advocate… hell, even an entertainer. Richard shuddered a little. Those words and occupations probably didn’t exist as options, even with a resurgent civilization.
On further reflection, he realized he probably would have been a farmer for the rest of his life, never knowing he was awakening to magic. In fact, he probably would have been a professional heartbreaker and philanderer due to his predilection for mind magic. Eh. At least he’d have lots of kids?
Well… not everything was terrible recently… there was the salt bath…
Focus, Richard! We are not digging a new hole in the ground for another salt (mud) bath! We have… GUESTS!!!!!
After he had poured out his soul to these wonderful new friends of his, he almost didn’t have enough energy to lead them all back to their room. He had known that it would be challenging to unearth the memories he had locked inside. It had dredged into his deepest pain, and he had laid it out for them to see.
Richard reminisced on the day as he lay in his furs pretending he was asleep.
As his guests had talked to him, he began to realize that his imagination wasn’t vibrant enough to have come up with the stories of childhoods and experiences that they were telling him. He began to realize that they were not, in fact, hallucinations.
That was a hard pill to swallow. It took more time for the idea to percolate into his mind firmly.
He recalled a great daydream that was more a descent into madness that lasted for perhaps two months. He had been sure that there was a tribe of wolves that he could talk to. They hadn’t attacked him, and he had brought them food. They seemed amiable enough, and intelligent. He invented names and pasted personalities upon them. He had even adopted two of the runts that year, sure in the knowledge that they knew what to do when winter hit.
Digging the graves for Keilo and Hevrah the next spring had almost broken him, until he had figured out what was wrong with the Arcstone and fixed it in his mind. The memories were… faded. They had been dimmed almost immediately. He still remembered their cute nips and wanderings, though.
It was a strange memory. He could remember the warmth of caring for something fondly, but his sadness at their separation was muted and cold.
He never tried to have a pet again.
This time was different. He had set up many if/when mental barriers, and they had slowly activated the longer he had talked to these new people. It was obvious that they were speaking a language at him, not just giving hopeful eyes towards treats.
His mind was still reeling from the forceful binding of many long overlaps. Over time, Richard had layered hundred or so year stretches locked away one at a time. When they all began to dissolve and synergize he felt that his mind was fracturing in reverse.
Strangely, the only skill that continually stuck with him was working leather. He loved to create in general, but the working with leather had seeped into his bones, and he just loved the challenge and satisfaction of a well made piece of leather clothing.
It was, of course, at that moment of reminiscence that Ethren came barreling back into the wards like a hawk from the Ether.
Richard couldn’t help but focus on him as he began to report, and he barely realized he was outside of their door by the time it was obvious he should say something.
He felt no embarrassment as he walked into their room and told them that he wished for their tribe to be safe, and to bring them here.
It was a big step, Richard knew. He would need to begin to set up areas for crops and living. There would be a long and trying time for him being surrounded by strangers, but he knew that it was the right call.
If there was one thing that Richard was good at from his long vigil, it was gigantic menial jobs.
He was captivated yet again by Olena’s green eyes. They had seemed to glow as she locked her sight upon him. Now that he thought about it, she had some strange reaction to seeing the Arcstone chamber. Ah, well. He would just go try to sleep once again.
His face was feeling a little warm from remembering her piercing gaze. It was a strange sensation. He wasn’t sure what it was, and felt a little sad that despite his thousands of years of memories, he couldn’t remember this feeling. He felt… warm? He also had trouble not thinking about her. Weird.
He was about to turn back into his room when he heard Saravren start laughing like an idiot down the hall.
Ah, Saravren. What a breath of fresh air she was to his soul. Youthful, full of vigor, brave and strong. Her golden eyes still burned in his memory, and he wondered if she would last the winter as his pups hadn’t.
If she didn’t, it would probably be his fault. If that was the case, perhaps it would be time to simply rest. Eternally.
He couldn’t allow these new Elom friends of his to perish.
He wouldn’t let it happen.
As Richard stood in his doorway, his hand began to grip the stone harder as he thought. There was a low grinding noise as his imagination went wild.
He could see these… monsters… coming for his new tribe. They might kill women, children. Ethren had told him of how their tribe was almost 80% female at this point from the desperate exodus and so many of their men fighting for their survival.
Richard knew it was sexism that had brought them so low, and may even be the reason that they had lost their war. By the time he was sixteen the world had realized that there was truly very little difference between men and women for fighting. He would have to drill that idea into the minds of his new friends.
As Richard’s mind finally shut down from the emotional exhaustion, he double checked the wards.
He was a little worried about the state of some of them, but it had been his fault for locking the knowledge on how to fix them away for so long, he supposed.
Regardless, tomorrow was another day, and he hoped he could meet more people.
----------
Richard jerked awake. He had slept in so long! It was rare that he would sleep until almost noon. He must have really worked hard yesterday.
As Richard began his morning routine, he almost realized that there was something different today. He ignored the notion, mind still strangely fuzzy.
As he walked out of the fort towards the river, his bleary eyes finally realized that there were significant changes to the fort. The hallways were clean? There was a nice open area outside of the entrance? He was standing in a pair of barely-there shorts staring at the cat peop… Elom gathered around the fire pit making lunch and chatting.
They all paused as he walked out of the fort with his shaving kit and bathing gear.
Richard’s mind began to wake up enough to realize what was going on. He didn’t move for a moment before he decided it was too early to deal with all of this. He smelled, he had to shave, he was barely awake. He still had a suspicion that the Elom may not even be real, though he thought that he knew better at this point. Eh.
He decided to pretend for a moment that nothing was different and walked to the river to complete his morning routine. It had grounded him for millennia, and he couldn’t not do it at this point.
He realized the two women had flushed faces and wouldn’t make eye contact with him as he walked back after his bath. Ethren and Yim tried to say something to him, but he just ignored them and grunted while waving them off. He refused to interact civilly with people until he was fully dressed and ready for the day.
When he did make it back out to the firepit and looked at the mess that his guests had made of brea… er… lunch, he decided to take charge. He refused to have mediocre meals now that he had salt. His herbs were growing well and there was plenty of stock left from fall that had been stored over winter.
It was an odd feeling that overcame Richard at that moment. He felt.. Like some sort of grandfather grumbling at the ineptitude of youth, while he was simultaneously drawn to show off like a teenager. It had always been a strange disconnect to be ancient yet stuck in the hormonal body of a twenty year old.
As his mind fully began to churn, he realized he remembered so much. He realized that he was, in fact, a master at unformed mind magic. He could only use it on himself because he had never known the proper sigils and theory into mind magic, nor had any people to test it on. He was also a master leatherworker. He was a master chef, with what ingredients he knew… He was… a master at death. In fact, He could easily see himself as the preeminent authority of dealing wholesale slaughter. What a thing to teach his children.
Oh, right. Richard supposed he was also the ultimate authority on… old things. Things that didn’t matter. Things that have probably been forgotten. He wasn’t a virgin, but he may as well be.. He was eighteen the last time he had had sex. That meant that it had happened so long ago that… frankly, children might know more about it than he. Or farmers. Or almost anyone. He couldn’t even remember what a handshake felt like, though he had many fantasies.
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It was strange having an old soul in a young body, he supposed. And it wasn’t like he had a ton of differentiating life experience to give like a real old person. He had basically lived the same year over and over without growth, but simultaneously had accomplished things that no twenty year old could ever brag about.
I mean.. If he wanted, he could turn the horizon into liquid flame… wait. That would be stupid. But he didn’t know how to talk to people. Usually when someone gets old at like sixty or eighty or whatever, they have had so many interactions with others that they can disassemble wisdom to the younger generation. He didn’t have that. His hormones and emotions were in turmoil as he fixed a much improved lunch.
He was frowning at himself in confusion, barely following the discussion when Olena came to his rescue once again.
“Richard, are you feeling okay? It seems like you are off-kilter.” She said gently as her hand fell on his upper arm.
Richard stopped stirring the stew and took a deep breath. “I feel like nothing has changed, but everything has changed at the same time. I apologize for my taciturn response this morning, I’m just having an issue accepting reality, I guess.”
Saravren butted in with, “I know how you feel! Who could have guessed we would find this amazing place after being hunted for so long? I feel like I should be ranging ahead and looking for threats to the tribe, but instead we’re all sitting around waiting for word!”
Richard chuckled as Olena spoke up. “Yes, well we shouldn’t get too comfortable. This is a more temporary solution than I would like. Those idiots from the kingdom are still going to come this way.” Her eyes darkened as she sat back down on the bench.
Richard began to stir the stew as he talked. “I wouldn’t be so defeatist yet, Olena. While there is a certain truth to the temporary state of our new situation, you might not know of one important thing.”
The Elom around the fire leaned forward, but Richard just chuckled.
“Winter. It is still early spring now, but I can clear enough land for you to farm in the next few weeks. None will starve this year.. though I cannot actually say anything about the winter as I have slept through all of them. Regardless, anyone caught outside of the wards when winter falls will not be able to remain. Winters are harsh in the mountains, so your pursuers would be forced back home.”
Elder Yim glanced around the fire before saying, “I wouldn’t be too sure of that. We are most likely being pursued by the second or third prince. They would not be able to return home in disgrace. They can ship food and supplies from further south easily enough. I hope that if they cannot find us, that it will be enough for them to turn back.”
Olena chimed in with, “Are you going to level this beautiful old forest for croplands? That feels… wrong. Is there no other option?”
Richard looked at Olena confused for a moment, before he realized that she didn’t really understand.
He said, “Olena. This is a fortress. That mound of rubble there used to be a great wall, about the height of four men standing. Ideally, the whole area would be cleared for the length of a longbow’s range. Um… that’s about five minutes of walking?”
Richard kept stirring the stew slowly as he reminisced.
“It was all cleared back then. But I challenge any of you to constantly fix something that isn’t needed for a thousand years. Not to spoil the surprise but - you won’t give a shit after a while. A while being like… a decade, maybe. Regardless, the idea that I may need to actually fortify the area means I should bring the brush back all around. It should give you well over one hundred acres for crops.”
Everyone went a little silent at the bombshell reminder they were dealing with a being that was too old to understand.
Of course, Saravren came to the rescue.
She jumped up from the bench and in one bound came right up into Richard’s personal space with a serious expression almost infusing her golden eyes.
“Oi, old man. I get it. Your life is so loooong and it all sucks. Stop being weird. Do you even remember how to talk to people anymore? Well… actually now that I think about it, you probably don’t.”
Saravren looked to the side with a pensive expression.
She suddenly grabbed Richard’s arms and looked into his eyes with jubilance, “I know! I figured it out! Richard, you are gunna take care of the old people and the kiddos! I mean, sure do your magic thing and stuff, and get the land ready for crops, but if there are two groups that can teach you about life it’s kids who just say whatever they think regardless of how stupid it is, and elders who say whatever they want regardless of the consequences! I’m a genius!”
Richard watched in amazement as the cute young cat person embarked on an impromptu victory lap. It was a good idea, actually. Elder Yim and Olena looked at each other and communicated something in tiny gestures and twitches that Richard would need an eternity to figure out, then both simultaneously looked at him like he was a fresh meal and they were starving.
Richard had a bad feeling about all of this.
Luckily he was saved by mortal combat. Err… at least a new message about it, at any rate. There was a loud and blatantly obvious bird cry from the fort, and Saravren took off like a shot for the border of the inner wards.
She quickly came back, letting Richard know that he needed to add another person to the wards. After a quick jaunt into and back from the Arcstone room, he met a new person - Deilos.
He came up to Richard and gave a strange salute before saying, “Richard, It is my honor to meet you. My name is Deilos, and I am one of the rangers for the tribe. I was the one that gave the report to Ethren about the incursion, and after resting I was commanded to return to give an update. Would you mind if I had some privacy with Elder Yim and Olena?”
Richard extended a hand, which Deilos grabbed. “Of course, the stew just needs to be stirred every five minutes or so from the bottom. It’ll be ready in about a half hour, if that’s enough time? I wouldn’t trust myself to not eavesdrop inside of the inner ward, so you may want to take your discussion past the ruins of the walls, actually.”
Saravren’s inexhaustible perkiness popped out as she said, “Hey, I’ll keep Richard company, you guys go talk. We can be here at the stew, and when you are done we can eat!”
Richard’s heart hurt a little as he felt the honesty coming from Saravren. She really did just want to keep him company. He had to turn away from the fire to hide the tears welling up in his eyes.
To think. Someone who was actually real would just… want to keep him company. It was almost too much.
The others moved away after a quick exchange, and Saravren exercised maturity beyond her age by not interrupting Richard as he sniffled and looked away in shame. She even stirred the pot slowly, like he had been doing.
Richard gathered himself and then turned to her and said, “I feel like I should explain something to you Saravren, in order to bring our future interactions into context. It’s important, I think, but also embarrassing.”
Saravren just looked at him and raised one of her bushy yet well sculpted eyebrows at him.
Richard coughed a little and then began, “As you know, I have been alone for a long time. I had noticed you on that first day, and it confused me. Your emotions blended into the magical field as you stalked me.
“When we finally met face to face… Your eyes. They are the most beautiful thing I have ever seen. Your body - four limbs, a head with emotion. You are a hero to me, and I will probably remember our meeting for… a long time. I see it in my dreams, actually. Those golden eyes looking out of the shadows...
“I just wanted to let you know how much our meeting affected me, and I also want to say that there isn’t anything else about it… it was just… nice. Beautiful. Amazing. You are an interesting person the more I get to know you, and I just wanted you to understand how much meeting you meant to me. That’s all.”
Saravren was instantly overwhelmed, and she noticed to her horror that she was blushing like a teen thinking about her first kiss. She was mortified on some level, but she also understood.
In order to guard her reaction she asked, “What was it like? I mean, I know you can’t really explain it… but what was it like to be so alone? I think it’s amazing that you are still here, frankly.”
Richard took a deep breath before backing up while he sat on a bench and leaned back. Oh how to describe it?
“Have you ever been all alone, far away from everyone, in a field or something at night with clear skies and no moon?” He asked her.
Saravren replied, “Of course! What of it?”
Richard’s mind was sucked into some of his memories.
“The stars. They are so bright and there are more of them than you can count. Even if you lived as long as I have, counting them is impossible. You always lose your place, trust me.
“It isn’t until you have watched and thought about them for a while, that you begin to wonder. What if… what if every one of those stars is a sun?
“How far away must they be for us to barely be able to see them? How much emptiness must be between us and those glimmering lights? Even the very bright ones that almost seem like you can reach out and touch them sometimes.
“So you look at them, and you dream. What life could exist there? What families and nations are creating stories we may never know?
“So - you make some stories up. There, that blue-ish star; perhaps it is a water world where civilization lives under the seas. What would it be like to be able to move in any direction? What kind of farms could they have?
“That red one. Maybe it is mostly dry land with barely any water. What kind of society might arise that is based only on water as currency?
“You just keep imagining. Imagining what it would be like for someone to come and meet you. You imagine stories just like your own, but subtly different. You imagine what it might be like for a world to have happy magical creatures, or only those that are aggressive. You imagine what it would be like to talk to them.
“That’s what it was like. But I thought about this planet, much more than the stars. Every day, every year, I would come up with hopeful what-ifs. But they never happened.
“Then one year, I found something strange. I decided to take a look. My mind was worried that I might be disappointed, but then a form jumped out of a tree, and I was frozen. Golden eyes. A body that resembled my own. A language that I couldn’t understand, but was obviously not just grunts and yells.
“I don’t think I can explain the feelings I had at that moment. Even if I tried to come up with words for the next thousand years. It broke my dreams into a million pieces, but it also pushed back that cold death that has been creeping up on me for a thousand years.
“I’m just really happy that I got to meet you, Saravren. Regardless of what happens in the future, know that you have changed someone in a fundamental way simply by… deciding to say hello, I guess. Sorry if that is a bit too much, but I thought you should know.”
Richard glanced at Saravren and saw that there were huge tears falling out of her eyes. He noticed that at some point the others had also returned, and they were all standing still as if hoping to not break the moment.
Richard smiled, and he almost felt more than heard, Saravren sigh.
Richard continued, “Olena, I suppose while my mind is in this place, I should also tell you that your kindness and empathy have been a balm for me. I also realize that you may need to come with me to the Arcstone chamber. There was a resonance there that I think should be explored. Regardless, the food is ready. I would like to hear the news.”
Everyone shook like they were coming out of a dream as Richard dolled out the stew.
Elder Yim said, “Richard, we have an issue that isn’t really an issue judging by what you have said before. We wish to bring our tribe into the wards for protection. I know it might be difficult for you as the translation spell doesn’t seem to work outside of the first, but I beg of you for your protection.”
Deilos decided that he would butt in with a more military description. He said, “Richard, the Kaila have found us. They are… not good people. They use slaves, serfs, and generally force women into harems and such. If the intelligence I have gathered on you is true, I feel like you believe in our own creed of individual liberty. I do not ask for you to kill, but perhaps a show of force? Just… blow something up near them and scare them away? I think it might work, though probably not. It really sucks that you can’t talk to people outside of here.”
Richard nodded and explained, “The translation spell is something that I should know, especially as a talented mind mage. However, I never had a target upon which to practice it and so it is gone from my mind. My mind magic really is only self-taught and self-targeted. Perhaps if I had a large group of willing subjects I may be able to revitalize the school within a few decades, but that isn’t helpful.
“As for a show of force… That’s simple enough. May as well give it a try.”
The group chatted for a little while longer, staying away from the heavier conversations.
Eventually it was time for bed. Richard felt lighter for explaining himself to his new allies. They may think it a terrible situation or pity him as some sort of idiot, but he didn’t mind. He was just happy that there were other people nearby.
It probably wouldn’t last, but as he had let slip to his guests, Richard had always been a dreamer.