What exactly is Hell? Well, we all know it as the final place for those deemed unworthy of paradise. This usually comes from a more Christian doctrine, though various other theologies have their own special hells. The Ancient Greeks have the Underworld, separated into three parts: Elysium, Asphodel, and of course, Tartarus. Chinese mythology has the Diyu, while the Ancient Egyptians held the Duat. Hinduism and Buddhism have Naraka, while Taoism interestingly has no concept of Hell. Hell itself is a concept, a construct, a tool to keep people from acting in malice, greed, or lust. Hell, Christianity has so many versions of Hell that a whole field could be set aside just to study it all. So, the question repeats: What exactly is Hell? 

     I personally find that Hell, at its core, is a cold place. Milton, Dante, the writers of the Bible, they always depict Hell as a place of fire, of heat, of eternal burning. But, at least now, heat is a luxury, it is sought after, built around, honored and praised. The cold, though having its pros, is usually something we avoid now. We avoided it then, we avoid it even more now, thanks to heat being easier to harness. So Hell must be a place of cold. Perhaps not of ice and snow, but chilling, biting winds. It’s the goosebumps that form when a sudden blast of wind hits you. It’s the cold sting of steel at the tip of leather. The chilling viscosity of oxidized iron. Hell is cold. 

     But what of its residents? Its ruler? Its punishers and inmates? Are the punishments individualized? Or is it by the masses? I couldn’t say for sure. Personally, this cold Hell is far more like Asphodel. Those who did not live virtuous lives aren’t inherently evil or even simply bad. They simply cursed too much, smoked, drank, things of little consequence when in moderation but still frowned upon. They would wander, a mass punishment, but not one of damnation. What would be the point? The coldness of Hell would be punishment enough theoretically. But what of the others? What of those individuals who truly deserve damnation? More than likely it matters on who you think runs Hell. Is it just Satan? Or is Satan not the same as Lucifer and Lucifer runs Hell? What if it’s actually God who oversees Hell, a grand judge if you will. I like to think of it as a bit of both. God oversees, Satan “acts” (we’ll cover this a little later). Manager and employee. Satan is evil, do not get it twisted, but a strange comparison can be made here. Think of Santa Claus and the Krampus. Santa controls the Krampus in most stories and folklore, it (the Krampus) is not a free creature. God is Santa, Satan is the Krampus. God runs Heaven with a golden fist, while he holds Hell in check with a rusted, barbed wire whip. Because of this, the divine punishments in Hell are grand and horrific. 

     These punishments obviously vary from person to person, but God utilizes the hatred the living have for these truly damned. The punishment one person has in mind may be different from another, and these two punishments act as one. Now imagine that at an international scale. Some individuals who are undoubtedly in Hell are going through millions, perhaps billions of punishments simultaneously yet one at a time. A paradox, but God himself could be considered such a paradox. However that is not the discussion at hand. Perhaps another day. 

     Anyways, now that I have described what the punishments within Hell are like, what else of Hell is there, at least this version. What of its physical aspects, its residents who are not the damned, its influence? Does it have any of these? Once again, this could go any direction. For me, Hell is stone. Mountains and hills, lacking life. No grass, no trees, only dirt and rock. There is no sky, no connection to Heaven here, only a ceiling of stalactites. All around is stone. Gray, cold, sharp stone. Erosion has occurred, making treks here dangerous, as one wrong step could end it all. Of course, not in the sense of death, as that would defeat the purpose of this place. But you’ve traveled so far, only to fall. A true Sisyphus scenario, unending walking in a cold and hard landscape. As for those who fall under the truly damned, those with unique punishments, what better place to hold these individuals than the caves underneath? Locked away in true darkness, where only those built for seeing in the dark could thrive. Chained away, nailed to the walls with nails, the true punishment within their own minds. Within these caves lie the Furies, Greek mythology’s divine torturers of the underworld. Here, within this Hell, they are the Wardens of these caves, keeping the illusions and mind games in check while their wards suffer through them. 

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     There is no need for guards, as no one comes into Hell alive, and their punishment, be it bland or divine, is determined by the Tribunal of Hell. The Tribunal functions in three parts: the Judges, the Jury, and the Mouthpieces. The Judges are the Seven Deadly Sins of Christian belief, specifically these seven demons: Asmodeus for Lust, Belphegor for Sloth, Mammon for Greed, Leviathan for Envy, Beelzebub for Gluttony, Moloch for Wrath, and Baphomet for Pride. Why these demons? Well, for Lust, Sloth, Greed, Envy, and Gluttony, these are connected to through “The Lanterne of Light”, a 1409 poem written by an anonymous English Lollard. However, Satan is usually Wrath and Lucifer is Pride, and as Satan is who runs Hell and is not a Judge here, and Lucifer being a moniker for Satan here, two new individuals needed to be selected. Moloch is Wrath, as he is a god of human sacrifice, while also being the greatest warrior amongst the fallen angels within John Milton’s “Paradise Lost.” As for Baphomet, he is the most recognized, the most associated with the Devil, with Satan. He is often used in current imagery, unlike the others, with the goat still being seen as a demonic symbol. Pride is the most corrupt of the seven sins, so it only makes sense for the most recognized to hold this office. What of the Jury then? Thankfully, this is a bit simpler. Who better to say how guilty the defendant is than those who were most wronged by the individual? These jurors would all come from Heaven, the only sources of light in this desolate fog. They would determine just how corrupt an individual is, as angels are merciful creatures, but that doesn’t mean they can’t hold a grudge or have strong feelings. All a damned soul can hope for is mercy here. The final two to talk of are the Mouthpieces. These demons represent both the damned and the Jury. The angels do not speak, and the damned soul has lost the right to speech, so the Mouthpieces do the talking for them, acting as lawyers. These two are Nemesis, Greek goddess of Revenge, and Nyx, Greek goddess of Night. These two women I’ve chosen for semi-obvious reasons. Nemesis is the Damning Mouthpiece, showing the evils the soul has committed. Nyx controls the darkness, unveiling anything that could have been overshadowed by these evil acts. 

     This is how the Tribunal functions, allowing Satan to be as uninvolved as possible, as he, the Grand Duke of Hell, is under his own punishment. Satan, ever the trickster, suffers the punishment of the Norse god Loki. Chained in a cave by the very flesh of God, he lies on the ground as a serpent, the very snake he possessed in the Garden of Eden, drips venom upon his eyes, blinding him for eternity. From here, Satan is a false ruler, a face of Hell and not a king. A final slash after hundreds of others. 

     This is what Hell is to me. Call it what you will, heretical or fantastical, this is the truest version of Hell I can make, artistic liberties aside. I am no John Milton, no Dante, no Bosch. But, with the same ego that many other authors have, I’ll call this Hell a Josephian Hell. Self-centered, I know, but perhaps that is what a depiction of Hell should be: self-centered and selfish.