Kazama Noh, age 16, blue hair, Caucasian, slightly above average height, slightly above average looks.
“No, I’m not a foreigner, my parents just really like Japan.” Is his most frequently uttered phrase.
“No, it’s not dyed.” Is his second.
Every day, for every class he’s ever taken, Kazama walks into the room and sits in the second-to-last row’s leftmost seat. No matter what sort of classroom it is, there is always a window by his seat. Upon learning these facts, most people would assume that’s Kazama’s favorite seat. However, Kazama despises it.
“Would you please switch seats with me?” He asks at every opportunity.
Whenever he convinces a student, the teacher always forbids it. Whenever he finds a lax teacher, the students become obstinate. When he leaves early to secure a different seat, he discovers that the class has pre-assigned seating. Every class has different circumstances but every circumstance forces him to sit beside the window in the second-to-last row.
“It’s part of being a protagonist.” His mother explained. “Protagonists in anime and manga always sit by the window in the second-to-last row.”
“Huh?” A young Kazama scoffed. “Why do they sit there?”
“I don’t know. I guess it just makes them stand out?”
“Well, I don’t want to stand out. I want to be normal.”
“To be honest, I’d sleep a little easier if you and you sister were normal children.” Kazama’s mother patted his head. “But I love you both regardless. Life is the one who deals the cards, but you’re the one who plays them.”
“Hehe~” Kazama broke into a rare smile. “I didn’t expect you to say something cool.”
“Thanks! Phantom Thief Toto-chan said that in chapter 47 of High School Detective Versus Thief. Oh, that’s episode 11 of the anime, by the way. I’ll lend you the first volume later.”
“N-No thank you, Mother…”
~ ~ ~
Pritchard’s High is a normal high school. From classes, to clubs, to sports teams, everything that comes out of Pritchard’s is exceedingly average. It may not have been a first-choice school for many, but Pritchard’s was a godsend for Kazama and Belle. The Noh siblings do all they can to live as normal students despite their circumstances. However, that diligence is rarely rewarded.
“Sorry I’m late!” Kazama announced as he hurried into his classroom. “There…uh, really isn’t an excuse.”
“Don’t worry, you just barely made it.” A young man standing at the teacher’s desk told him.
Kazama took a second to collect himself and then looked at the man. “I’m sorry, who are you?”
“My name is Faust.” The man smiled warmly. “Mr. Glenn is feeling sick today, and he asked me to be his replacement. I don’t know where you normally sit, but please get ready for class.”
Kazama nodded and walked towards his desk while watching Faust out of the corner of his eye. Abnormal events like transfer students and substitute teachers had caused him trouble in the past, and so he was on his guard.
“Kazama.”
As Kazama approached his desk, he felt a tug on his shirt. Kazama looked down to see a familiarly plump hand. Its owner sat at the desk neighboring his.
“Bert’s seat is open. I think he’s also out sick.” His neighbor whispered with an encouraging wink.
“Thanks, Daniel.” Kazama whispered back.
Kazama continued walking until he reached the very back row. Hesitant, he looked up at Faust. The sub had already forgotten Kazama, and was now leafing through the class textbook. Kazama put his hand on Bert’s desk, savoring the moment with a sigh. Then, he pulled the chair out and finally took a seat in a new part of the classroom.
*crack*
Kazama wasn’t able to feel even a half-second of satisfaction before Bert’s chair gave way. All four legs snapped at once, leaving Kazama sitting on the floor.
“Hmm, it looks like that chair was on its last legs.” Faust muttered.
The classroom was silent, save for Faust’s muffled chuckling.
“W-What I meant to say is—are you hurt?”
Kazama slowly shook his head. His eyes were wide open in a thousand-yard stare.
“I’m glad. There’s another open desk, so please change seats.”
With his face frozen in an expression of shock and disappointment, Kazama picked himself up, trudged over to his desk and slumped down in defeat.
~ ~ ~
“Ahaha~ That was some bad luck.” Daniel chuckled after class ended. “Then again, it’s never luck with you, is it?”
Kazama’s only response was a weary sigh. He sat with his head resting on one hand. With a twist of his arm, Kazama faced his head towards the window.
“Why do you hate that seat so much?” Daniel pried.
Kazama swiveled his head back towards his neighbor. As usual, his stony expression told Daniel nothing.
“It’s a constant reminder of my condition.” Kazama explained. “Every day, every class, for my entire life. I sit there and remember that I can’t go against fate. Plus…apparently, that seat makes me stand out.”
“Kazama, I’ve been thinking this for a while…” Daniel folded his arms. “If you don’t want to stand out, the first thing you should do is dye your hair.”
“Dyes don’t work.”
“Shave it off?”
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“Mom threatened to cry.”
“Hmm, what about growing it out?”
“If my hair gets any longer, it’ll become spiky.”
“That sounds awesome! Grow it out.”
“No.”
Now it was Daniel’s turn to sigh. He reached for Kazama’s hair and began to play with it. Even with short hair, Kazama’s head began to resemble someone who hunts magical wishing balls. Kazama tolerated Daniel for a few seconds before slapping his hand away.
“If you can put up with your hair, then you can put up with that seat.” Daniel said, grinning. “To be honest, I think those powers are wasted on you. You’re living a life that an anime fan like me can only dream of.”
One of Kazama’s eyebrows twitched. The blue-haired youth stopped supporting his head with his arm and leaned towards Daniel.
“You say that because you don’t know what it’s like.” Kazama narrowed his eyes, and Daniel flinched under his glare. “Getting your life uprooted by forces beyond your control.”
Daniel raised a shaking hand to adjust his circular glasses. He continued the motion, smoothing his greasy black hair that fell just below his ears. Daniel’s lips, which were awkwardly wide for a boy, pursed into a frown. His school vest clung uncomfortably to his torso. It was clearly not made to accommodate a youth of his size. An uncertain look in his eyes completed the image of an awkward, less-than-social teen.
“I-Is it really that bad?” He muttered. “Being so important all the time?”
Kazama leaned back, cooling off. He absentmindedly touched his hair.
“I’ll tell you a story…This happened in my first year of middle school. It was when I learned just how obnoxious my condition could be.”
~ ~ ~
“His hair is blue! Isn’t that weird?”
“Yea, so weird!”
“I bet he really wants attention.”
“Hey Blue, how’z it goin?”
“Blue, do you think you’re a TV character or something?”
Kazama closed his eyes, refusing to respond. He had learned to tune out such comments. Reacting only gave his tormentors traction. The teasing would disappear after few weeks, just like it had in every other grade.
“I actually think it looks cool.”
Kazama’s eyes shot open. It was a comment he couldn’t ignore. Kazama scanned his classroom to find the source of the voice. The culprit was a tall blonde girl with clear blue eyes. He stared at her without realizing it and when the girl noticed, she smiled and pointed at her eyes.
“Because we match~”
Ever since then, Kazama was smitten. He found himself staring at the blue-eyed girl in class. He would doodle pictures of her in his notebooks. When she spoke, he clammed up. When his parents recommended anime with similar-looking heroines, he watched them enthusiastically. Awkwardly and timidly, he fell in love for the first time.
One morning, Kazama’s heart nearly stopped as he opened his locker. An envelope had been neatly placed atop his belongings. He opened it with trembling hands and the note inside read;
If you have time after school, please meet me on the roof.
In place of a signature, a blue heart sticker sat at the bottom of the note. With his mind addled by love, Kazama’s expectations soared. He spent the day imagining confession scenarios.
When the last bell rang, Kazama flittered between hurrying and ambling towards the roof. His heart was pounding so loudly that he worried others would follow him. After psyching himself up, he finally opened the door to the roof. Allie, the blue-eyed girl, was waiting for him.
“I like you.” Were the first words out of her mouth.
“I-I like you too.” Was Kazama’s semi-immediate reply.
Blue light erupted from the school’s roof. Kazama closed his eyes and was nearly flung back into the door by a gust of wind. When the dust settled, Kazama opened his eyes to see a changed Allie.
Her white skin had become pale as moonlight. A deep blue line snaked its way across her back. Her body glistened through a thin sheet of mucous. Allie looked down on him from a half-meter difference, if you counted eyestalks. Her limbs were nowhere to be seen.
Kazama’s eyes opened wide and his mouth unhinged in a silent scream. He looked every bit like a boy who’d just learned that his crush is a giant slug.
“What’s wrong?” Allie slithered forward. Somehow, her voice had not changed. “You can undo your transformation.”
Kazama managed to lift his shaking legs enough to step back.
“I’m…human.” He breathed. Even as a middle schooler, he had already been part of many misunderstandings. It was a knee-jerk response.
Allie stopped her advance, freezing like a deer in the headlights.
“But your hair…and this aura…”
Allie flicked her tail end forward and a pulsing blue light enveloped Kazama. After a few seconds, the light suddenly cut out.
“Oh.” Allie was the one backing away now. “So you are…”
The two stood a meter apart. The silence was deafening.
“D-Don’t get the wrong idea.” Allie finally spoke. “Unlike humans, my people choose our mates based on aura. So, when I said like…it wasn’t like that. Ok?”
Kazama nodded stiffly like a marionette.
Allie whistled sharply, despite being a slug, and a low thrumming sound filled the air. A vehicle that could only be described as a flying saucer appeared out of nowhere. Allie slithered inside and then it shot up into the sky.
Kazama never saw her again.
~ ~ ~
“So, your first love was a giant slug.” Daniel spoke while hunched over. His shoulders trembled and he held his arms close to his belly.
“A giant space slug.” Kazama confirmed “Who, was apparently a bit of a tsundere.”
Daniel’s entire body began to shake. Much like his uniform, he was about to burst at the seams.
“WAHAHAHAHA!!!” Kazama’s friend pushed his forehead into his desk while slapping the wood with his hand. “T-That’s…AHahahaha…That’s very unfortunate, Kazama. I guess even someone attractive like you has love troubles.”
“You’re right.” Kazama said, ignoring Daniel’s hysteric state. “Honestly, I wouldn’t mind sitting in the same seat every day if it wasn’t by the window.”
“Wh-Hahaha!” Daniel interrupted himself with another brief laughing fit. “What do you mean by that?”
Kazama pointed to his window and Daniel leaned forward to look outside. Two stories down, Daniel noticed movement in a hedge that marked the edge of school grounds. With some effort, he picked out two girls hiding in the foliage. In each of their hands he saw the flash of a glass lens. Daniel swallowed loudly once he realized they were holding binoculars.
“The one on the left is from an alternate dimension. She got stuck here one day and, apparently, I resemble someone she knew in the other world. The girl on the right was, apparently, my lover in a past life.”
Daniel replied with a gaunt nod. The way Kazama said ‘apparently’ suggested no small amount of frustration.
“Sometimes I feel eyes on me even when we’re moving between classrooms.” Kazama muttered with a sigh.
Daniel quickly turned around and a few girls suddenly buried their heads in their textbooks.
“H-Harem…” Daniel breathed. Partially due to his surprise, Daniel used the Japanese pronunciation Háremu.
“So, yea, I don’t agree when you said this power is wasted on me.” Kazama furrowed his brow. “My condition is not enviable in the slightest.”
Daniel put a hand on Kazama’s shoulder. Kazama’s friend smiled a wide, close-mouthed grin.
“Allow me to offer a counter argument.”
Kazama met Daniel’s gaze. The husky boy’s veins bulged and the skin around his forehead and mouth creased. His amiable smile had been distorted by a righteous fury.
“To quote many dissatisfied manga characters…GO EXPLODE YOU FUCKING NORMIE!!!”
The argument that followed was violent enough to send them both to the principal’s office. However, Kazama felt strangely happy after the whole affair. After some reflection, he realized that it was the first time anyone had called him normal.
“Being happy about it only proves that you’re abnormal.” His sister would later say.