I couldn't think of a time where I wasn’t playing games. Naturally, when I came back from school or after work, I would be on it until I had to fall sleep. On weekends, would be from dawn to dusk, games were a large part of my life. 

If I wasn’t playing, I would be watching or reading about it. However, these past years have started to bore me. I guess if you do something long enough, you start to tire of it. Maybe it’s because game companies have been releasing remasters of games I've already completed, or the new games are getting easier catering to the filthy casuals. 

It didn’t matter the genre; RTS, RPG or FPS. All the new games that came out every year just felt like they were swindling there customers out of more money. Draw you in with flashy animations hiding core game parts under gambling mechanics. 

I thought the gaming industry was doomed; it wasn’t until I discovered “Blood and Hungar”.  This game was special, an oasis. It was made by an overseas indie developer, rumour has it by one Finnish man, if you can believe that. For a brand-new release, it had pixel graphics making it looked like it was made 30 years ago. But graphics don’t make a game. In all honesty it didn’t look like it would be my type of game but it had gotten such rave reviews on its release. 

Putting my judgments aside from the lack of visuals I installed the game to see what all the hype was about, and soon I became enthralled. It was nothing like I had played before.  Hard was an understatement, the game didn’t hold your hand. Only one difficulty realistic. Your character dies that’s it no reloads, no do overs, you had to start over again from the beginning.  

It drops you into the world with no information, tutorial or guide. The game designs itself based on trial and error giving your character an unreal amount of freedom. Unfortunately, most of the time leading to your death, but with the knowledge gained during that run you would be better equipped in the next one.  

I was by no means a speed running expert but I would have a game completed within a couple of days, however it took me a whole two years to be confident in getting to the middle floors in “Blood and Hungar”. The reason, after three month nobody was close to completing the game, twitch did a promotion that the first person to complete the game will receive thirty million dollars. It was a great marketing scheme. Jumping straight to the top streamed game smashing all previous records, generating so much money for the platform.  

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However, that's when the online guides and strategies dried up. People that made it further down kept their cards hidden or ended up selling their information online to private buyers/ brokers. I had to give up looking for strategies and make my own way. “Follow the corridor down, take the third left, use a rope down the pit, smash open the hidden door on the right. Finally, roll past the ceiling trap... Okay I'm safe”. 

Arriving at the end destination, a beautiful sight to behold. Large double doors engraved with the depiction that can only be assumed the end of time. “Passage of the Ordeal”.  My character stood before the final boss room; all my dedication and hard work paid off. The joy seeing it for the first time, I saver that feeling. Obviously, with no prior knowledge what awaits, I discern without doubt I'll be venturing back here many times in the future having no hope to defeat the boss on the first try.   

It took me ten years to reach this point, a whole decade of my life. The entirety of my 20s, me and the game have been inseparable. Some people may feel it's not a big deal, others may have just played it for the potential to earn money, but I have loved every moment in game. 

A message pops up as my character approach's the door. “Would you like to enter?”. I've seen this a thousand times. I clicked yes. Another message occurs “You may not return; do you wish to enter Passage of the Ordeal?”.  From my prospective this was unneeded; every time you enter a boss room the run might end, resulting in a game over. I click yes and my eyes met a blackened loading screen. 

Excitement and anticipation with thoughts of the final boss. What would be the attack patterns, would there be any room mechanics I had to dodge or use. Must avoid any instant kill sequences. Gather as much information possible. How does my character build play against the boss's weakness and strengths, I may have to uproot my current strategy. My brain focused working overtime coming up with ideas. It was too late to notice the foreboding message. “Tutorial complete”. 

“Start of the Ordeal”. Well, that’s ominous, tutorial complete? Confused stricken Liam, as a bright light started to emit from his monitor screen blinding his vision. “Damn it, what the hell, my eyes!”. The last message he could remember “transfer begins”.  

Everything in an instant had turned white. All I could hear was constant ringing and my mind had fade, a complete numbness to everything. I could no longer feel my back resting against my chair or my hand gripping my mouse. I'm not one to panic or stress in a crisis, but in that moment, my confidence to cope had been shook. I don’t know when I had lost consciousness from the bright light, opening my eyes again I was no longer sat down. Stood next to leather wearing brutes. I was a barbarian.