I couldn’t sleep.

The alcohol swum in my head, and I lay on top of the covers, hands placed across my stomach as if to secure it there. The thoughts that made it through the buzzed haze were unclear, undefined, and most of all, of Alyss. Everything I thought I ever knew before tonight had been completely turned around. And of course, my future, my life, my dreams, all hung in the balance.

I still didn’t want to take this AUT deal. Everything about it felt wrong, shady, and a bit medieval. It was as if we were back in ancient days, where marriages sealed alliances, people betrothed against their will, brides forced into agreement. I didn’t like the feel of the whole thing.

If I took the deal, what would it be like? I’d be in a potential loveless marriage, albeit with a sweet girl. Of all arranged marriages to be in, this one surely had to be a best case scenario. She would run AUT in time, and I would be Prime Minister. But what of Mea? I wanted to become Prime Minister to help her and her people, but most of all, I wanted to be with her.

If I didn’t take the deal? I’d continue on as a Lord, of course, still a Montgomery and following in my father’s footsteps. I’d have enough funds to make some votes go through, but probably not enough to sway the entire Cabinet. I’d be able to try my best and hardest to make changes happen, but likely not enough. It would take a massive overhaul to achieve the kind of results that Mea needed and I wanted. But if I didn’t take this deal, then I wouldn’t be in an arranged marriage. I’d be free to pursue Mea in earnest, like I wanted to. I knew deep down that was something I needed to, to see if that spark we had between us was enough to smolder for a lifetime.

Though, I wondered what she would think if I were married to Alyss. Would she give me the time of day? Or would she be okay with being a piece on the side? I frowned thinking of it. If I wanted to be with Mea, I wanted it to be right. She deserved to be shown off, pampered, and treated well, not hidden away like a dirty secret. I wanted to give her the world.

But what she really wanted was her own world, her islands back, her people free. I doubted I’d be able to give her that if I didn’t have the power that came with being Prime Minister. And as a result, without the AUT deal to make it happen.

I sighed, even more confused. I had no idea what to do. I turned on the wallscreen to try and drown out the noise in my head, the news spouting more about the brand new stop and search law that had been announced at the charity ball this evening. They showed footage of Robert Chetland speaking, the Chief of Police speaking, and everyone shaking hands. I groaned. I hoped this new law would pay off fast and that we’d find this murderer immediately.

A few minutes droned by, the wallscreen doing nothing to put me to sleep. I kept it on, though, knowing that my thoughts wouldn’t let me sleep right now either.

What would I do about Alyss? She was a perfectly reasonable and logical girl, who also seemed just so sweet and innocent. She could be easily taken advantage of, her kindness making her an easy target. She would need to toughen up before she was running any businesses, though. She would need a level head on her shoulders.

Her room was right across the hall from mine. I wondered what she was doing right now. Was she able to sleep well, unlike me? I hoped she hadn’t drunk too much for her, and that was feeling fine. She’s much smaller than me, I had no idea what her limit for that sort of thing was.

Even worse, I wondered what Mea was doing right now. Was she alone? Was she missing me, even though she hadn’t had the time to message me back? Remembering I’d turned my WaComm off, I twisted over to the bedside table and slapped it back on my wrist. It powered up as it connected with my skin, and within moments, I could see there were no notifications. She still hasn't messaged me. I sighed again, brought down even further.

We weren’t in a relationship, something I’d have been trying to remind myself of. WE weren’t exclusive, and I had every right to go on with Alsys and see if there was something there for this potential arranged marriage to be based off of. But I wanted there to be something with Mea, so badly, and I wanted to know if there was more to it, if we could be something. Every moment I spent with her has been exhilarating, even the quiet stroll after breakfast, let alone the sit-in protest we’d almost participated in. With her, everything was new, fresh, and exciting. She was life, vibrant and colorful, beautiful and lush. I wanted to know more.

But if she couldn’t be bothered to talk to me, then maybe things weren’t going quite as well as I’d thought. I hadn’t seen her in what felt like ages, even though it’d only been about a month or so. I didn’t know what she could be so busy with that she couldn’t even message me every now and then. It’d been a few days since she’d replied at all; I wondered if she even kept her WaComm on her.

Mea had thrown a wrench into my plans for the future. I decided right then and there, I would let her sort it out. I would have to speak with her and let her tell me what she thought. Since I hadn’t seen or spoken with her, I needed an update. I would give her an ultimatum – either she lets me know how she feels about me, or I am done. I can’t be held on the fence like this. And right now? I’m single as hell until she claims me. I felt the fury build up inside me, the determination fueling me. She would know who she was dealing with, I thought.

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Timid knuckles tapped at my door.

Startled, I got up out of bed. Who could that be? The only ones at the mansion were my father, Cerise, and… Alyss, who was just across the hall. Hurriedly, I ran my fingers through my hair, looked down around at my room to see if it was too messy, and ran my hands over my clothes. It would do.

I walked up to the door to open it slightly.

Behind it was a shy looking Alyss, her hair now brushed out into soft waves that cascaded down her shoulders. She wore a knee-length silky nightgown, wrapped up in a warm sweater cardigan. The slippers on her feet were the kind you could wear outside. Puzzled, I tilted my head.

“Is everything all right?” I asked quietly. She looked like she might up and run away, how she was dressed. It was as if she put on pajamas but was tempted to walk and leave for the night.

“Yes! Well, sort of. I can’t sleep.” She pointed her eyes inside my room towards the wallscreen. “I noticed you couldn’t either.”

“Oh, you heard that? I’m sorry,” I said, rubbing the back of my head. “I thought it was quiet enough.”

“You’re alright,” she said. “I wouldn’t have heard it if I had been able to fall asleep in the first place.” She licked her lips, pausing before she spoke next. “Would you… erm, would you like to take a walk out in the gardens?”

I blinked. That explained the shoes and sweater. “Uh, sure. A bit of fresh air might do us good. One second.”

I ran back inside my room, threw on the first jacket and shoes I could find, and turned off the wallscreen. I returned to ALyss in the hallway, who waited patiently. I extended my arm to her, and she took it; it made me feel as if I was a gentleman leading his lady around. We walked towards the gardens, mostly in silence, while she looked around appreciatively. The gardens were beautiful at night, I’ll admit. I’d been seeing them for years, of course, since I grew up here, but the way the moon shone on those leaves madea them almost look a different color, a deep, gray blue, instead of the vibrant green they normally were.

We’d been walking for a few minutes when Alyss stopped. We were in the middle of a little winding path that led through the main parts of the gardens; we were almost to the small fountain. I could hear it gurgling, just a few yards away, hidden by sculpted bushes.

“Can I ask you something personal?” she blurted out.

This girl would never cease to surprise me. “Sure. What else would someone ask at three AM?”

She smiled, then it turned to a nervous grimace. “Are you… single?” Alyss asked me timidly, her voice barely audible.

I raised my eyebrows, thinking about the implications of her question. I was, by all definitions of the word, single. Mea and I were technically not more than friends, barely even shared a kiss. We weren’t exclusive, hadn’t even determined that we were in a relationship, and as much as I’d like to be with her, it would be nearly impossible to make that work.

I sighed. “I’m single, yes.”

Alyss smiled softly and shyly. “I assumed that you were, given this deal we’re involved in, but… I just wanted to know for sure, I suppose.”

“Ann understandable question,” I said. And she certainly had reason to be concerned.

“I would, um, understand if you liked someone else,” she whispered. “But you’ve been so nice to me, getting to know me, that I…” She stopped and stared at me, eyes wide and reflective; vulnerable.

I paused, letting her finish her thought.

“Erm, I’m not good at this,” she said, fiddling with her hair, looking everywhere but at me.

I waited, patiently, understanding that whatever was on her mind would come out eventually. I was curious what she was thinking anyway, and was willing to wait to hear it.

She turned to face me again, her cheeks flushed and red. Suddenly, she pulled my face down to hers and kissed me. Her lips tasted of strawberry balm, her breath of mint. Surprised, I let her kiss me, her fingers furrowing into my hair, mussing my blond locks. The shock wore off, and I let myself enjoy her embrace. It wasn’t hard to do – Alyss’ kiss was just as sweet as she was.

We parted, Alyss’ breathing heavily, her cheeks still flushed and eyes wild.

I stared at her in wonder. She had done nothing but surprise me continually all evening, and I didn’t know what to do with myself. One second I thought I knew what to expect from this girl, and the next, she was kissing me like that. She said she just wanted to be friends, to get to know me, and that she had no reason to push a marriage between us if it wasn’t true, but here she was, in my arms, the moonlight reflecting off her deep blue eyes like two shimmering pools.

“Could we… continue this elsewhere?” she whispered, her soft words barely audible. “Your room, perhaps?”

It was as if I were stuck in a hurricane, being twisted and turned around by each whirlwind, the way this girl was acting. I think I got whiplash. I wasn’t sure how to respond though. She looked so vulnerable, putting all of her cards on the table, and I couldn’t deny that what she suggested was something I wanted. I tried to think of why I should deny her, but kept coming up blank. Whatever I had with Mea, it couldn’t hold me back from pursuing what could be my future. And there was no denying that Alyss held the keys to all of my hopes and dreams, right in her delicate hands. Could I throw that all away for a maybe, a wisp of a hope, for Mea? We weren’t exclusive, we weren’t even in a relationship.

And it wasn’t as if Mea had to know.

Right then and there, I had made my decision. I still wasn’t sure about this whole AUT deal, but I could at least try. I owed it to myself, to my future, to my family, to the well-being of the people of Aruga, to try. Mea couldn’t stand in the way of the greater good, right?

“Yes, let’s go,” I said quietly, taking her hand in mine, leading her back to my room.

The moonlight painted the path below, the flora glowing as we passed through the garden and back to the house. Whatever was going to happen, would happen.