"Owowowow!" Chikita hissed as Cuppy sewed her up from the inside out, her legs kicking where she lay back on the mat. "Easy! You're scrambling my intestines!"

"I'm unscrambling them." Cuppy protested, flicking her forehead. "You dingbat, did you think these kinds of injuries would just heal on their own? I'm amazed you're even alive at all, this body is a wreck." Cuppy continued sewing.

"I feel better!" Chikita lied.

Freyja sat beside the assassin, her wolf tail swishing. "First time?" she asked, remembering her own Cuppy treatment.

The apartment was practically Cuppy's clinic at the moment, everyone thoroughly busted up like ships blown to flotsam. Richie's knuckles were cracked from punching that freaky lion, and the knee of the leg he had performed his dropping ax kick with was swollen stiff, giving him an awkward limp.

"We need an actual doctor." Cuppy said.

"Healthcare doh." Richie grimaced.

Being injured was fucking expensive.

"I know." Cuppy clarified. "I mean we should get a doctor to join us."

"Join us in what, exactly? Hey doc, wanna head into wonderland with us and wage war on a clandestine sect with license to kill? Maybe get bit by a rabid troll? I'm sure that won't get us committed." Richie chuckled.

"What is our plan, anyway?" Freyja asked.

"Well that's kind of up in the air right now. This creature-" Richie lightly kicked Chikita in the side, eliciting a hiss, "is supposed to show us how to use the Backyards. After that, I say we use it to snag shit to build up our castle, undermine the suited fascists, root out and destroy other sources of that black slop, and determine which ferals can be tamed and coexist."

Holly raised an eyebrow. "So we're really going to gamble? On letting them in, I mean?"

"You're literally an illegal alien." Richie threw a peanut at her.

"You can probably assume that if they're flooding in here, they're running from something. Maybe shades. I wouldn't wish that on anyone." he scratched the inside of his ear. "If we get rid of the phony elixir of life, the refugees won't have a reason to berserk anymore. The only ones who have to answer for their sins are Luchesi and the Faceless Man."

And Mason. Freyja thought bitterly, looking at Cuppy's bullet wound.

Ketchup her ass. Now wasn't the time to tell Richie though. He'd flip out and go charging into the place, guns blazing. They'd crush the men in black when the time was right.

"There, all done." Cuppy snipped Chikita's last thread, and pat her hair.

"Finally." Chikita sighed, reaching for her pipe and sake gourd.

Cuppy snagged them away from her. "Uh uh. No. You can't smoke and drink while recovering from your internal injuries."

"HUAGH?!" Chikita quacked, horrified.

"You need bed rest. Lay back down." Cuppy said.

"The hell you say!" Chikita tried to sit up, heard her vertebrae crack, squeaked in pain, and fell back down.

Holly had a smug look on her face.

"Shut up!" Chikita barked at Holly.

"Miss Yule?" Cuppy tugged on her skirt.

"Yes, Cuppy?" she asked.

"I have a question."

"We still aren't in school anymore, Cup, you can just ask me." she said.

"Your critter suit is bonded to you, right?" Cuppy asked.

"Yes. Why?" Holly regarded the boy curiously.

"How do you poop?" Cuppy asked.

Holly's face darkened. "How vulgar! Get your - wait..." her eyes widened. "How do I poop?"

"Wardrobe malfunction?" Freyja asked.

"I'll cut you out of it." Cuppy pulled his giant pair of scissors out of nowhere.

"N-N-Now wait a minute, Cuppy!" Holly backed up, pale. "This thing is like my skin right now! That'd feel like getting flayed alive!"

"I'll give you a lollipop." Cuppy advanced on her.

Chikita cackled. "Not so fun now, is it, four eyes?!"

Richie sighed - yet more female undressing.

The wampus cat strolled in, a large bump on the top of his head. Richie blanched.

"Oh shit, I forgot about you! I'm sorry!" he clasped his hands in apology, falling onto his knees.

The wampus cat grumbled and trotted right past Richie, making a beeline for Cuppy. It pawed at his back, prompting the puppeteer to turn around. Cuppy looked at the mutant puma, sitting on its haunches, twin tails swishing irritably. It had a bitter scowl on its face.

"Oh! Weird kitty! You had a safe landing, that's great!" Cuppy pat its head.

The wampus cat wrapped its tails around Cuppy's throat, lifted him off the ground by them, throttled him for a few seconds, then slammed him up, planting his head in the ceiling. The tails fell away, the cat nodded emphatically with a hmmph!, and then he found a corner of the room to lay down in, tails curled around his paws. Freyja put down a bowl of sardines for him, and it sniffed them cautiously, before aggressively eating while glaring.

"How did he get in?" Richie asked.

Freyja looked to the talisman-nailed walls. "I guess the barrier doesn't consider him hostile. Rocky start aside, guess you can make peace with the invaders." Freyja shrugged.

Richie looked up at Cuppy, trying to pry his head out of the ceiling with all fours pressed up against it.

If you stumble upon this narrative on Amazon, be aware that it has been stolen from Royal Road. Please report it.

"Well," Richie sweat, "close enough..."

Richie paced up and down the apartment, twitching. He surveyed all the doors he wouldn't be allowed to remove now, necessitating he sleep in the living room beside the couch their esteemed potato dog had claimed. Only now, there were yet more roommates to adjust to. Bob the telescope dragonfly perched on his head, and Richie glared upward.

"Buzz off!"

Bob buzzed off.

At least the lights were finally on, that was good. Admittedly, he couldn't have accomplished this on his own. Now that electric power was restored, it was time to deck this shithole out! A washer and dryer! Kitchen appliances! That blender Cuppy snagged, hell yeah!

But most importantly, a goddamn TV. It had been so long since he'd been able to watch TV without it being through the glass of a display window. It would be nice to have a computer too, though he was wary about being located via their IP address. Would that be visible through the influence of the bound gateway to the Backyards? Then again, would they even be able to hook up the internet here to begin with?

Questions. Questions for later. Richie's mind was racing for once with something other than overwhelming anxiety.

He was excited.

As his nose caught a whiff of the bounty Holly and the Cuppy Bros cooked up, that excitement mingled with his watering mouth and growling stomach.

"Worked up an appetite?" Freyja asked.

"Sure have." Richie nodded.

"Save a plate." Freyja smiled, padding down the hall.

"Where are you going?" Richie asked.

"Well, Cuppy got the hot water running again too. I'm going to go take a much needed bath. No peaking!" she winked, ruffling Richie's feathers.

"As if!" he growled.

His dragons sniffed the air, saturated with the heavy aroma of stewed meat, cheese, and vegetables. Their nostrils flared.

At last, one of you can cook. they quipped.

Richie pinched them. "Hey, I can cook too! I just didn't have a working kitchen at my disposal, that's all."

"Hey, dragon boy, could you set the table?" Holly poked her head out of the kitchen.

"Fine." he stood and got to work setting plates and silverware.

Chikita was laying miserably on her mat, staring at her sake gourd and pipe. There were dark circles under her eyes, and she was visibly twitchy. Catching a whiff of food, her stomach growled too, displacing her withdrawal. She couldn't recall having a home cooked meal since she was twelve years old.

When the time came, chairs were assembled and everyone was seated, Chikita being plopped into and sewn to her chair. Before each of them was a deep clay pot heaping with steak, gooey cheese, and grill-marked cactus, broiled and stewed together in a choir of aromatic spices. Plentiful flat bread with goat cheese and herbs, dishes of savory yogurt, and platters of pinto beans, sweet corn mash, and Spanish rice were spread out as well. Two huge pitchers each of horchata and an odd drink of purple corn were circled by serving cups. Overhead, a chandelier provided mood lighting.

Richie's eyes were wide as saucers.

"Woah..." he drooled.

Something about this felt warmly familiar, triggered the phantom memory of different tastes on his tongue. Those had been of savory gravy, sweet spiced mead, and the salty goodness of deep sea fish. He couldn't recall when, where, or how that had been, but the lively atmosphere, if not the cuisine, had been a deadringer.

Cuppy, still dressed in a pink chef's apron, smiled vacantly.

"Dig in." Holly gestured across the table.

Richie began shoveling anything and everything down his gullet. Freyja rejoined them minutes later, a towel wrapped around her body and her hair still wet, and blinked at the chaos. Cuppy was spooning big bites of stew into Cuppet's compartment while Richie pulled back and forth in a tug of war with the wampus cat, trying to yank a strip of steak out of his mouth. Chikita chugged a tall glass of horchata.

"That's not cloudy sake at all." she looked sad. She still slid her empty glass toward Holly and gave her a puppy dog look.

"Stop guzzling it then!" Holly snapped.

Cuppy unhinged his jaw like a snake and swallowed an entire cactus leaf down his bulging throat, streamers of cheese hanging down his chin.

Freyja began chuckling softly, and tucked into her reserved seat. She was finally in a position to confirm the old adage about food tasting better with company.

Chikita lapped up her meal eagerly. "Hey, this isn't half bad!" she chirped at Holly.

"Damn straight." the archaeologist nodded proudly.

"Could use some soy sauce though." Chikita added.

Holly looked like someone had slapped her. "That's obscene!"

Chikita shrugged. Everything was better with soy sauce.

And pickled ginger.

"So, about our contract," Chikita began.

"Get us results first, and we'll get you your grog." Freyja waved.

Chikita frowned. "Well, you see, the time it takes to learn the ropes is variable, and-"

And what? Yukihana thought. Doesn't seem you'll be cutting ties so quickly this time.

The katana hummed.

Well shit, now what? Chikita wasn't a social creature.

One look at the Pollyanna in green gave her the impression that that wasn't really up to her though. Richie could have confirmed this.

"Cuppy, keep your filthy strings off my plate!" Freyja bit at him.

An entire night went on without any further mentions of the Faceless Man, the Institute, Luchesi, or the disgruntled ferals. If normal could be said to objectively exist, perhaps this was close to it.

Certainly, it was the closest thing to normal any of these rejects had felt in a long time.

"Hey, what's moonspeak for cheers?" Cuppy asked Richie.

"Kanpai." Richie answered.

"Then, some toast." Cuppy initiated, and all raised their glasses.

"Kanpai!"

…

Richie threw down a bedroll, one of seven that Cuppy had knitted, and began trying his best to make himself comfortable. As a child, he had always wanted to have a sleepover, never understanding why he couldn't.

Now, here it was, and he had no idea what to do with himself. Cuppy finished knitting Chikita, and gave her a liberal helping of anesthetizing string. She rotated her wrists and cracked out her back.

"That's pretty impressive." she pat the little puppeteer.

Cuppy nodded.

Freyja shifted into her wolf form and sat curled up at the end of her bedroll. If pressed to answer why she didn't just sleep normally, she would remind them that they had no clean sleepwear. New clothes would be added to the list of shit to get.

As for Richie, he was content to sleep in just his undershirt. Chikita, however, looked at him expectantly.

"No need to cover up on my account, kid." she bore canines.

"That reminds me." Richie held his chin.

...

"What the hell?!" Chikita growled, gripping the bars of a cage set in the corner of the room, her bedding taking up the iron floor.

"I'm not closing my eyes on you without precautions." Richie chuckled.

"These are trumped up charges!" Chikita protested.

Richie folded his arms.

"At least give me my shit!" Chikita pleaded, arms grasping through the bars for her gourd and pipe.

"Nope. Doctor's orders." Richie thumbed to Cuppy.

"Sleep." Cuppy sewed a black shroud over the entire cage.

They could hear her gnawing on the bars within.

"Speaking of which," Cuppy turned to Holly as she fluffed up her pillow.

"Hmm?" she regarded him.

Cuppy equipped his scissors. "Snip snip. We gotta get you out of the clingy costume."

Holly blanched again. "T-That's not necessary!"

"Sleep." Cuppy shot her neck with a string that burrowed into her, and she slumped over.

Richie cringed.

"I see your bedside manner hasn't improved." Richie clutched his forehead.

Cuppet silently giggled.

Freyja shook her head, bemused, around the room.

"Ok litter mates, lights out."

The power went down, and the living room was plunged into darkness.

Soft, tender, motherly darkness.

...

Sleep peacefully, children. a melodic voice on the edge of the forest lullabied.

The rain falls when it may.

Within the garden Richie had dreamed of, a ripple spread across the fountain.

I will wait for you all in the Garden of the Forged. There, your destiny will be made clear. Reserve your strength. Until then, sweet dreams.