Prologue
[Congratulations!]
Welcome to the new world you will be living in from now on.
The system is now booting and will be helping to guide you along your journey.
We will now start the booting of the system, please hold still so that all limbs may stay attached during the process.
[Boo̸̒͐t̸̆͌ì̷̈n̷̈̈́g Systé̷̈m̷̊͋]
Initializing …
Step One of…. [T̷̝̲̟͇̘̽͌w̶̧̅͌͝e̶̗͕͙̿̂̒̅ͅl̴̡̹̜̮̤̄v̷̡̗̂͆̆ȩ̶̜̲͌]
[Boot Failed]
Error during step T̴̝̩͉͕̐̐w̶̖̠͔̹͗̈́ḙ̸̩͂͝l̵̡̥̇v̸͉̌̅̾̕ẹ̶̟̝̐̚
Restarting….
[Boot Failed]
Reverting to previous version of system
[Booting system]
Initializing …
Step One of [Nine]
[Boot Failed]
System 32 Error: Missing natural gift and/or gift incompatible with system.
Royal Road is the home of this novel. Visit there to read the original and support the author.
[Process stopped by an administrator]
Error: Forced insertion of natural gift may result in further corruption of the system.
[Bypass code: ‘send halp’ Entered by administrator]
[Administrator, please insert disk A to abort boot]
Completed: Disk A inserted
[Administrator, please locate the ‘blue’ button on the back of the console, press it three times with half a second between each press]
Completed: Button successfully pressed.
[Administrator, please remove Disk A, and insert Floppy Drive Q]
Completed: Disk A removed and Floppy Drive Q successfully inserted
[Administrator, please Do a barrel roll! {press (Z) or ® twice to do a barrel roll}]
Completed: Barrel Roll successful.
[Administrator, please input Contra Code using floppy disks labeled (Up), (Down), (Left), (Right), (A), and (B) {Note: this has to be done within a certain amount of time, or you will have to start over.} {Remove drive Q before starting}]
Failure: Contra Code unsuccessful, moving to alternate step.
[Administrator, please input Konami Code using floppy disks labeled (Up), (Down), (Left), (Right), (A), and (B) {Note: this has to be done within a certain amount of time, or you will have to start over.} {Remove drive Q before starting}]
Completed: Konami Code verified.
[Administrator, please use the provided light bulb and switch and use morse code to send “accept” into the photoreceptor to purchase Bugfix DLC]
Completed: Morse Code accepted, Bugfix DLC Being downloaded, Proceed with instructions.
[Administrator, please re-enact the final scene from ‘Romeo and Juliet’ using a stick figure animator, provided graciously by torrents {Note: Please watch for viruses}]
Failure; no viruses detected, please try again. Erasing saved animation.
[Administrator, please re-enact the final scene from ‘Romeo and Juliet’ using a stick figure animator, provided graciously by torrents {Note: Please watch for viruses}]
Complete: Virus detected.
[Administrator, please remove virus using an antivirus constructed by yourself using only 16 bit operating systems]
Complete: Virus removed.
[Administrator, please patch Bugfix DLC into computer systems with the use of the provided microphone by singing ‘O Canada’ in French]
Completed: That was a beautiful rendition of ‘O Canada’
[Administrator, please complete ‘Through the Fire and the Flames’ (by Dragonforce) DDR Version with an accuracy of 80% or above {Note: Dance pad must be provided by administrator}]
Completed: Accuracy of 81% achieved.
[System will now restart, forcefully inserting natural gift in to an older model of the system]
On that day, a sigh was heard across the multiverse.