"Sorry! That little bugger won't listen. I'll discipline him later," Donna said. She sighed and rolled her eyes.

Emm checked the mushroom for damage. The stalk had a large bite taken out of it.

It's not ruined, is it?

His fists hurt. The goat's skull, like all skulls, hadn't been very soft.

"So, that's your pet, I guess," Emm said. He stared at her suspiciously. It was awfully convenient how it had tried to steal his ingredient just a moment before he would get money from it. It had to be on purpose. Emm considered upping the price. She wasn't much better than the other locals.

Donna waved her hands in the air. "It was an accident. Look, let's just forget about it. I'll still buy the stupid mushroom. Three skulls, final offer! What do you say?"

He was pretty sure he could've gotten more for it if he'd asked for ten instead of five. Emm was still learning this world's normal prices. So far it seemed a skull was worth something approximating five dollars.

But it was too late now. Increasing the price a third time was too risky, she wouldn't budge. At least he now had a better idea about how much to ask for the next time he tried to sell something.

And getting three skulls didn't sound bad for a start. He'd take it unless it had an extremely powerful effect.

He was tempted to just eat it right in front of her out of spite. Still, it was hard to say no to her smile.

"I'm not sure," Emm drawled, "tell me what it does."

Donna walked back into the cluttered cabin. Emm followed, leaving his mana-damaged spear leaning beside the entrance. It was too long to take inside with him. He just hoped nobody would screw him over and steal it while he was busy talking.

"It has a minor [Invisibility] aspect to it, which is a pretty rare one. I should be able to isolate it and enhance it."

It did sound powerful.

"Wow. So eating it would make me invisible, got it."

"Not for long, and not instantly. Or not completely. You can never be sure until you try it. It definitely wouldn't last more than ten seconds."

That was more than enough to get him out of a pinch. It could even be used offensively.

Or to steal.

But it was interesting that she'd never seen the mushroom before. Was it really that rare? Emm remembered how he'd also failed to notice it by the tree until he touched it by accident.

He decided to try and look for more of them. On the other hand, he wasn't very hopeful about his chances. When hunting the [Vinesnakes], they didn't come across a single one. They couldn't be too common. He'd still try, of course.

The [Cook] extended her arms towards the cauldron and flicked her fingers.

"[Stoke Fire]!"

Emm reflexively stepped back as the flame exploded in intensity and made shadows dance all across the small room.

They calmed down a moment later. The fire was crackling louder than before.

"Of course you cook on magic," Emm grumbled, "I don't suppose you'd be willing to buy any wood?"

She looked back at him and chuckled, stirring the purple stew.

"No. I don't think anybody would, for that matter. The cold doesn't really bother us."

If Emm had to guess, it was due to their increased Toughness stat. Or Endurance, when he thought about it in more depth. Or just a general consequence of having more mana inside them.

It wouldn't matter much to him either way, since he had no stats to speak of.

Donna grabbed one of the bowls and filled it with steaming stew. She offered it to Emm.

"For your troubles," she winked.

Emm cocked an eyebrow. "Is it going to give me manaburn? I'm not even [Level] 2," Emm said. He accepted the food either way, of course. If it turned out to be too strong for him he could always gift it to Michael, or even someone else.

"It's no worse than the snakes. I don't need more than a pinch of higher leveled spices to fix up the flavor."

She handed him a rough wooden spoon as well, then eyes the mushroom in his hands, expectantly.

Emm gave in and handed it over, receiving three coins in return. The metal felt surprisingly cool in his hand as he pocketed them. The skull engraving made him nervous. He'd laughed it off at first, but their nation seemed seriously messed up.

This narrative has been purloined without the author's approval. Report any appearances on Amazon.

"Thanks for your business!" she chirped, then delicately rushed to cut into it with a sharp-looking knife. She took a small cube and put it in her mouth. "Bring me any more of them that you find," she added, mouth full.

Emm took that as his cue to leave and gave her a thumbs-up. She didn't see it, fully focusing on the new toy in her hands. She weighed it on a scale and even poked it with a syringe of some sort.

He'd gotten his money, that alone was better than what he'd been hoping for when originally approaching her. Now he was looking forward to trying her food and seeing what a high-level [Cook] could do. It smelled even better so close to his face. Warm in his hands, too.

Just as Emm turned around, something strange grabbed his attention from the corner of his vision. His head snapped back.

Donna's hair was gone.

Invisible.

He laughed at how ridiculous her bald forehead looked but left without saying anything. With a bit of luck, she wouldn't notice before someone else saw her like that.

Or, as his dad used to say, "we make our own luck".

Emm smirked and left the claustrophobic hut, checking once again to look at her bare scalp. The skin was a lighter color than that of her face, which only made her look more silly.

He grabbed his spear and briskly walked away, balancing the stew from spilling out. There was no time to sit down and eat it then and there. Besides, he was fine with letting it cool a bit. No need to scorch his mouth, his taste buds were ruined enough already.

Emm strolled around for a full minute before spotting the first two awake people. Two women whose names he didn't know yet were sitting around their dead campfire, chatting. He walked past them from a calculated distance away, staring at his precious bowl and pretending not to notice them. Just near enough that they could hear him clearly, but not so close to make it seem like he was directly addressing them.

He planted his spear on the ground and secured it with his elbow to free up his hands. He tasted the stew, letting out a loud moan in delight.

"Mmmm. Can't believe the [Cook] is giving food away for free! This is so good," he said to himself.

He was exaggerating, but it did taste fantastic. It faintly reminded him of Indian cuisine, just slightly less spicy. He'd gladly pay money for it back on Earth. It was infinitely better than the grilled [Vinesnakes] he'd had before that point. The hot meat melted on his tongue.

Just as planned, the women noticed him. Emm shoved another couple of spoonfuls in his mouth and walked away with a smile.

He repeated the process a few more times with different people around camp. A few were walking towards the showers, while others were warming up and practicing their [Skills] on the training dummies. At least Emm hoped they were [Skills]; the way that a big guy's longsword blurred into the wooden doll looked entirely too fast for human eyes.

He pretended not to be jealous.

There was no more food remaining in Emm's bowl, its contents were all in his stomach. He was feeling the manaburn. The bowl had been pretty small, but it was enough to make him hurry back, eager to continue dismantling his tree.

He looked towards Donna's "restaurant" in the distance, smiling at the group of heroes surrounding it. His actions had caused a small commotion. They were probably asking about their free snake stew. The [Cook] had come out to meet them, bald as a newborn.

The sight was strangely satisfying.

Emm wondered how he'd so quickly switched from desperately trying to survive to playing pranks on the locals. Why wasn't he taking this all more seriously? Sure, he had a childish idea of wanting to get revenge for the stupid goat, but why did he act on it? Donna wasn't even that bad compared to the others, despite trying to get her pet to steal his mushroom without paying for it.

It would be logical to feel more shock and terror, but he was taking time to joke around. It felt like a coping mechanism.

Being so close to death was making him more impulsive.

He needed to focus on what mattered instead of getting petty revenge on those that had slighted him. There was no rush, anyways. Emm would make sure they'd all get what was coming to them. It would be easier to get back at them once his position was more secure.

The Guide he would save for last, of course.

Emm took a detour to stomp by his tent, planning to drop off the bowl and spoon there. They were too big for his pockets, and he needed both his hands free in order to carry as much wood as possible. He decided he would leave his spear by the tree too, this time.

When he got close, he was met with a strange sight. The goat was standing next to his tent, sniffing at it. It raised one of its legs like a dog.

"No!" Emm shouted at it. He ran at it to try and stop it.

But he was too late and too far away. It started pissing all over his tent, making direct eye contact all the way through.

Emm tried to throw his spear at it as soon as he could– it was heavy–, but the weapon wobbled in the air and missed its target. The crazy goat used its other three legs to slowly walk around, soiling as much surface as it possibly could.

He forced his legs to pump faster and faster. He planned to wrestle it to the ground just like before, but this time he wouldn't let it go. He'd had enough.

The goat had other plans though. When it sensed danger it pranced away bleating. Emm tried to run after it, soon realizing it was pointless. He was far too slow, and lagging behind. Each swing of its tiny wings made it accelerate and leap forwards.

Emm gave up and stopped. He just stood there, shocked.

Okay. Okay. I see how it is. One more for the list.

He calmed down and proceeded to reclaim his spear, before continuing on his way.

Moments later, he was standing back in front of the tree. He used it as a target to unleash his frustrations, breaking and chopping up branch after branch. He targeted the thinnest ones first since it was far more satisfying to feel them crack apart after only a single swing of his weapon. In his mind, Emm imagined the tree had faces of the stupid locals and the even-stupider-goat. He even used his hands to break a few of them manually just to vent his anger.

Emm made sure to keep track of his breathing so he wouldn't get tired too quickly. He had to last long enough to get rid of the fresh mana he'd just eaten while keeping the healing effects.

He lost track of time, swinging again and again. After a while, his anger passed but he didn't slow down, determined to finish what he'd started. He kept going until the tree was reduced to nothing but the main trunk and a couple of too-thick branches.

Emm looked back at the huge pile of leafy branches he'd chopped off. It was taller than him.

It was time to get to work. He threw his spear down and began to drag it all back to camp.