“I like you! Please go out with me!”

“Sorry… I can’t go out with you.”

After school, I was confessed to by a boy I didn’t know.

I can’t really understand it, honestly.

Why would you confess to someone you barely knew?

I don’t really understand it all. Is it maybe due to the fact I’ve never experienced romantic love?

Hard to say…

Looking at me, the boy had a shocked look on his face.

It was as if he’d expected me to say yes.

But why would I accept a confession from someone I didn’t like or know?

As I was turning around, the boy called out to me.

“Wait!”

I stopped on my track and gave him a stern look.

Why would he try to keep me here despite me giving him an answer?

“What is it?”

“C-can you tell me why?” The boy asked.

Why, you ask? I suppose I don’t have a strong reason for turning him down nor any to accept.

I don’t want to date someone with such light intentions.

After all, seeing how Mother and Father used to get along made me long for a loving relationship too.

But… for as long as I’ve remembered. The boys have been mean to me and giving me a hard time.

And the girls also started to give me a hard time at the start of middle school….

Both boys and girls started to call me ugly and weird.

I couldn’t understand it.

And that’s when I lost hope for a loving relationship like my parents had.

“Isn’t it because I’m ugly? Why would you want to date someone as ugly as me? Is it a punishment game where you must confess to the ugliest girl in the grade before graduation?”

The boy’s eyes were wide open, and he looked at me in a daze.

He wasn’t from my class, but he must’ve known.

Because for the past 3 years of my life in middle school, I’ve heard nothing but bad things about me.

Whatever to my face or behind my back, I’ve had enough!

Neither my sister nor my mother knew about this since I never told them. I wouldn’t want to worry them.

I turned around and started to walk away. Until he grabbed my arm.

Feeling my heart jump, I shook off his hand.

Cold sweat was running down my back as I looked at the boy in utter shock.

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“Why did you grab me!?”

The visibly confused boy came to a realization. He hung his head in shame and avoided my gaze. And tried to explain himself.

“... S-sorry, I didn’t mean to… I… I just wanted–”

“–Please leave,” I said in a quiet yet clear voice.

Supporting my body on the wall, I tried to not look scared.

I felt weak as I was shaking and barely able to hold myself together. I asked him to leave.

He could probably tell I was scared and left without saying anything.

Falling down on my knees, tears of relief came flooding.

—::::—

Walking home while thinking about the incident, I arrived at my doorstep.

It was unlocked, and it seemed like my sister was home.

I heard chopping noises as I walked into the hall and headed to the kitchen.

“Lena, I’m home.”

Hearing my greeting, she turned around with a bright smile.

“Oh? Welcome home, Lilly!”

Seeing her smile put a smile on my face too.

“I’m back.”

—::::—

After helping my sister cook and finishing the meal, we watched TV on the couch.

“Hey… Lilly….”

My sister looks at me with some concern.

“Yeah?”

“Is there something bothering you…?”

Could it be that she figured it out? That I’m being bullied? No way….

“... No?”

She looked a little sad, and I didn’t know what to think.

“I see…. There is something I want to tell you.”

“Sure… go ahead.”

After taking a deep breath, she began to speak.

“I will be moving out to an apartment close to the college I applied for…. It will be pretty far away from here and… well, Mom also got a new job.”

I wasn’t sure how to respond since I didn’t know where she was going with it.

“You see… Mom told me last night that we would move closer to her new job.”

“... I see.”

“Of course, it is after your graduation. And I also told Mom that I’d be moving out at the same time.”

Turning off the TV, she patted my head and hugged me.

“I will miss you, Lilly.”

… Everything was suddenly sinking in. and I could feel the moisture building up in my eyes.

Hugging my sister tightly, I cried.

She probably thought I cried because I’m a crybaby that is too attached to her sister… but… she was my only friend.

Mom would work long hours, and dad was gone.

I was bullied at school and felt very lonely due to it all… and she was my source of comfort.

But… I can’t hold her back from pursuing her dreams.

She would release me from her embrace and give me a soft smile.

Feeling overwhelmed and distressed, I spilled everything to her. How I was treated at school. How lonely I was, how I wished Dad was still with us and how much I wanted Mom could take a break. Everything I spilled everything.

—::::—

After graduating middle school, I moved to another city with my Mom and parted ways with my sister.

She told me that she would come to visit whenever she wasn’t busy with college.

Mom also spent some of her vacation moving stuff into the new apartment.

It was smaller than the house they had been living in for years. But It was newly built and aesthetically pleasuring.

It was fairly big for a parent and child, but it would feel bigger alone….

Mom would go to her new work and come home earlier every day, so we got to spend significantly more time together than before.

I was, of course, very happy that Mom wasn’t working herself too hard now, but… I still felt lonely during the day.

During the days when Mom was at work, I shut myself inside the new apartment.

Looking inside the fridge, I saw that we were missing ingredients.

Mom and I would go to the closest supermarket after work… but I can do that on my own, after all. She’s tired from work...

So on that day, I decided to head out on my own, not knowing the change it would bring to my life.

—::::—