Firestorm backed away several steps as Raphine’s arrow exploded into a fireball. Her hesitation did not last long, however, as she soon lunged forward at us. Honestly, to call it a lunge would be an understatement. From across the room, she suddenly flew at us with a burst of fire behind her. We scattered in different directions as she crashed into the floor, momentarily breaking apart in a burst of flames before recollecting back into her form.
Firestorm looked around the room at each of us, then down at the ground at the guy who had only just barely rolled out of the way of her attack. He pushed himself off the ground and cleared his throat.
“Good job, Firestorm. I will admit they had me in a little of a bind there.”
Firestorm grabbed the guy by his shirt and pulled his face close to hers.
“You’re in my way; get out of here if you don’t want to die,” she said in a sinister tone.
The guy gulped as Firestorm let go of his shirt. He scrambled across the room, almost tripping on his own feet along the way. He stopped in front of the door that opened to the stairs. The guy pushed the door open and stood halfway out of the frame, where he stopped to watch us. He must plan to flee if things got bad but intended to watch all the same.
“I see, fight fire with fire. That’s why it seemed to have an effect,” Tanaka-san suddenly said. We all turned to him. He was still rubbing his hand on his chin when I turned his way, then he let go and pushed his glasses on his face. “Raphine and Trash-Chan, we need to use fire to fight her,” he said confidently.
Firestorm spontaneously flew across the room at Tanaka-San. He quickly bent backward as her fist flew where his head was, all while having his hand up to his glasses. He backed away and pulled his jacket off.
She shot a stream of fire out of her hand, but he gracefully moved out of the way. At the same time, he wrapped his coat around his right arm. Firestorm moved her arm to make the stream of fire cut in Tanaka-San’s direction. He ducked under the stream like he was doing limbo and let the stream pass over him. Before Firestorm could react, he ran at Firestorm and threw his wrapped hand at her head.
It harmlessly passed through as she dissolved into flame in the area. Tanaka-San used the momentum to keep running. He stopped when he was about halfway across the room and turned to her.
“I guess it had no effect,” he said casually as he looked at the jacket on his hand, which had now caught on fire, “but it did buy time.” He lost the burning jacket around his hand and threw it at Firestorm. It harmlessly hit her chest and landed on the ground.
Firestorm was about to launch another attack at Tanaka-san, but his comment made her turn to the other two waifus. Raphine gave her no time before she launched a red-tipped arrow at Firestorm. It exploded into a fireball as Firestorm took to the air to barely avoid it.
Trash-Chan was ready for that reaction. She immediately threw her Combustible Trash at Firestorm. The flaming piece of garbage flew up next to her. Not knowing what it was, Firestorm did not react before it exploded in front of her. Firestorm was sent flying and landed in the loft of the room.
I took the opportunity to walk close to Tanaka-san. He was smiling and nodding approvingly at our apparent advantage. Trash-Chan and Raphine began to walk closer to the loft where Firestorm had landed cautiously.
“We are fortunate to have two waifus with fire abilities,” Tanaka-san said with a smile.
“Maybe, but Trash-Chan can only use two combustible trashes for each fight, and do we have any idea what the limit is on Raphine’s arrows?” I said. It wouldn’t matter if we had effective attacks if they didn’t hit before they were used up.
Tanaka-San looked shocked by what I said. Then he began to rub his chin again.
“Of course, their abilities have limitations; why didn’t I think of that,” he said in a manner that sounded almost frustrated. With his background, I imagine he already knew about any limitations on abilities. If I had to guess, he forgot about it in the heat of the moment. He had never participated in an official war after all.
“We can’t just rely on their firepower. We need a plan,” I said out loud, though I may have been speaking just to say something. Tanaka-san was lost in thought. I looked around the room. Our waifu’s were still slowly approaching the loft, the guy was still waiting halfway out of the door, and Beaufighter was still unconscious.
I looked around the room again, then back at Beaufighter. What had Junkers said when we first faced her? She would have missiles and possibly a bomb? If I’m not mistaken, then we might be able to use that. I ran over to Beaufighter, leaving Tanaka-san behind while he was lost in thought.
She was still out cold. I gently shook her, but there was no response. From across the room, I heard a loud crash. I turned to see a large sofa that was sitting in front of Raphine and Trash-Chan. They were looking up at the loft. At the same time, I looked up, Firestorm rose into the air and looked down at us.
Raphine shot another red-tipped arrow at Firestorm, but she only drifted to the side in the air to let the arrow fly past her. Before either of the other two could attack again, Firestorm launched a volley of fireballs at them. Trash-Chan and Raphine split up in two different directions on either side of the room. Firestorm continued throwing her fireballs at Raphine.
Trash-Chan took the opportunity to use her second combustible trash. She tossed it above her head, then snagged it with her Trash-Whip. She spun the whip with a jerk of her arms and threw the combustible trash directly at Firestorm, who was unable to react in time.
The trash exploded right as it hit Firestorm, and she was sent flying back against a wall. However, before she hit, she stopped midair. She fluttered uneasily in the air but was not taken down by the attack.
Raphine did not give Firestorm any time to react. She shot another arrow at her, but Firestorm fell to the floor and let the arrow fly over her head. She flew back in the air and began to focus her fire on Trash-Chan, who now helplessly ran away from the attacks.
Raphine backed up in the room; she did not have another arrow drawn for a moment. She seemed to hold her hand impatiently around her quiver before she drew another red-tipped arrow and fired it. Firestorm avoided the attack again as Raphine backed up to the wall. Firestorm chuckled as Trash-Chan dodged another fireball.
“You two are already at your limits, aren’t you? The time between the raccoon’s arrows keeps increasing, and the trash hasn’t tried to retaliate for a while.”
Raphine shot three arrows, a white-tipped one, a blue-tipped one, and a red-tipped one. They exploded in their corresponding attacks over Firestorm. She shrugged off the ice and water and avoided the fire again.
Raphine looked frustrated as she reached for her quiver. Firestorm shot a fireball at her, and she just narrowly managed to roll out of the way to avoid it.
I felt a hand grab my arm. All the while through the fight, I had been shaking Beaufighter to wake her.
“Wha-“ she said groggily.
“Do you have a bomb?” I asked.
“Sure, love,” she said after shaking her head to wake herself up. She tried to push herself to stand up, but I stopped her.
“We need to wait until the right moment, but I think the explosion will be effective on her. Rest for now.” I turned to look back at the fight. Raphine and Trash-Chan were helpless as Firestorm rained fire all over the room. The attacks seemed to fall within a certain area around Firestorm. I couldn’t tell if she was limited to a range or was just avoiding stretching out to the guy who still was halfway out the door. Either way, it meant Tanaka-san and I were safe for the moment.
Raphine fired another fire arrow at Firestorm, but she dodged it like the rest. Then she fired two streams on either side of Raphine. The raccoon girl looked helplessly back and forth at the flames as they moved closer together. Before they hit her, Raphine jumped up in the air to avoid the fire. Firestorm was waiting and suddenly flew forward. She delivered a fiery punch in Raphine’s stomach, which caused her to fly across the room and crash into the wall. Raphine was out cold. Firestorm’s attention turned back to Trash-Chan. Another barrage of fireballs rained down on Trash-Chan, who tried desperately to avoid them.
A hand grabbed my shoulder, and I turned to look. Tanaka-San had finished thinking and had walked over to me.
“Tell me, Juyo-San, what is Trash-Sensei from?”
“Huh?”
“Sorry, but it’s not a strange thing to ask. Has she ever told you where she was from, or have you found the source yourself?”
“No, but does that matter right now?”
“After I first met her, I did an extensive search online for a ‘trash waifu,’ and while I found many people labeling different waifu’s as such, I did not find her anywhere.”
“I was never able to find out either. Does it matter?” I asked, but I already knew where he was going with this conversation. It made sense when he said it out loud, but Trash-Chan might be similar to Firestorm. I could probably be sure she was identical, given what we heard from that guy. My realization must have been clear on my face because Tanaka-san continued like I understood.
“I have a theory about these waifus with no source. I think they are an artificial spirit that, instead of coming from a character, they come from a concept. For Firestorm, she’s an embodiment of a firestorm, and for Trash-Sensei, she’s an embodiment of trash. Like the fan and author theory, their abilities are based on the understanding of these concepts.”
“Even if you are right, does that make a difference in this fight?”
“Trash-Chan might have limitless potential to grow as long as it is trash themed; she might be able to unlock a new ability right here.”
“I see, so you’re saying she might be able to pull a deus ex machina plot point?” I asked for confirmation.
“Exactly,” Tanaka-san said.
“How exactly does that happen, though?” I thought out loud.
“We should try rooting for her, which will make her think about her friends and allow her to unlock her power. If that doesn’t work, you can try jumping in front of an attack, and when she’s crying about your death, she’ll unlock the power to get the victory.”
“Um, Tanaka-San. I know you already said it, but I’ll die if I get hit by a fireball. I’m not like a waifu.”
Unauthorized tale usage: if you spot this story on Amazon, report the violation.
“Don’t worry; it will only be a fake-out death. You’ll actually be fine, or the new power will heal you, or some other convenient thing will happen.”
I didn’t get a chance to answer. A loud crash came from behind me, and I turned to look at the fight. At some point in their battle, a chandelier had fallen off the ceiling and crashed into the floor. Trash-Chan was still trying to avoid the attacks desperately. She ran through the kitchen as a storm of fireballs rained down just behind her. She had used up her combustible trashes; at this rate, it was only a matter of time until she lost.
Trash-Chan tripped over the kitchens’ garbage can and went stumbling to the floor as the contents of the can spilled out. A fireball meant to hit her went whizzing over her head instead. She quickly somersaulted to avoid the next blow. From the somersault, she broke out into a sprint as the fireballs continued to chase her.
“Trash-Chan, you can do this!” I yelled, “Tanaka-san said you should be able to unlock a hidden ability in this fight!”
“Juyo-san, I don’t think that’s how you encourage her…”
“Main-kun, that doesn’t help me,” Trash-Chan yelled as she avoided another blow.
She continued to struggle while avoiding the attacks. I was at a loss of what to say.
“Trash-Sensei, we believe in you! We know you can do this!” Tanaka-San yelled.
“Trash-Chan, go!” Raphine yelled, having apparently woken up.
“Win this Trash-Chan!” Beaufighter yelled. I looked around at the people cheering her on.
“Trash-Chan, show her what the trash-tier waifu is made of!” I shouted.
Just then, Trash-Chan was engulfed in flames. Our cheers suddenly grew silent. Firestorm began to laugh as a large fire roared where Trash-Chan had once stood.
Her laughter was cut short as a silhouette appeared in the flames. The flames started to spin around the form until they began to flatten and form a disk shape. Trash-Chan emerged from the fire as they became shaped like two rings spinning around her. She looked at her hands, then her body, and then finally at the spinning rings around her.
“Does this work for a new power?” she asked us.
“Looks good to me,” I answered.
Trash-Chan turned her attention to Firestorm, who seemed to be fierier than she had been moments before.
“You dare use my powers!” she yelled. Trash-Chan made a friendly smile.
“I’m just recycling,” was all she said as she pointed her palm at Firestorm. The rings of flame broke apart and became two large streams of flames that were aimed directly at Firestorm. The streams combined into one giant wave that was about to crash over the fire waifu.
Firestorm took a step back and put her hands over her face as the wave closed in on her. We all cheered Trash-Chan on from the sides. Then, the wave suddenly fizzled out.
Firestorm cautiously looked up from behind her arms. Upon seeing there was no wave, she began to look around the room as if she thought the attack would come from somewhere else.
Those of us that had been cheering were now silent. We looked at Trash-Chan, who was looking at her palm with a confused look. She looked up at Firestorm and then at the rest of us.
“Sorry everyone, even if I unlock a new power, it doesn’t mean I know how to use it,” she said while sticking her tongue out, winking, and lightly tapping her head with her fist.
We said nothing. We simply stared at her. Firestorm continued to look anxiously around the room before finally shrugging.
“That was a good attempt, but obviously, you can’t use my power as well as me!” she shouted as she took to the air, apparently trying to pretend she was not scared of losing only moments before. She began her attack back on Trash-Chan, who was now on the run again.
“Well, that didn’t work…” I said while shaking my head.
“Hold on, Juyo-San. It could be that she has to keep using this power throughout the fight, and eventually, she will get a grasp of it!” Tanaka-San said while sounding like he was more trying to convince himself.
Trash-Chan continued to dodge the fireballs while Raphine began to push herself off the ground shakily. I looked to Beaufighter, who also was trying to stand up. I reached out and helped pull her up. Tanaka-san began to rub his chin furiously.
I looked to Trash-Chan; she jumped in the air to avoid another fireball. Then, in her hand, she had combustible trash. Firestorm took a cautious step back. She had been reckless, thinking Trash-Chan could no longer use that attack. She was now focused on what Trash-Chan was about to do as she began to back up to the opening in the window slowly. Now that Trash-Chan had an apparent advantage, she would try to fly outside, most likely to rain down fire inside.
Something wasn’t right though, Trash-Chan had already used her two combustible trashes up. Yet she was holding a piece of trash that was lit on fire like the attack always appeared before throwing it. I looked around the room and focused on the spilled over a trash can. She must have grabbed some garbage and was trying to fake Firestorm out. She could easily light it on fire with all of the attacks being thrown at her.
Firestorm continued to back up while staring at Trash-Chan; she was not prepared as one of Raphine’s arrows exploded on the side of her. She stumbled from the blow. Trash-Chan took the opportunity. She threw the trash to the side and began charging at Firestorm. While running, a trash whip appeared, and she wrapped it around her hand.
I wasn’t sure what was about to happen, but Trash-Chan had a look on her face that made it seem like she was about to end this fight. It didn’t seem likely that she could land and attack on Firestorm, but if I didn’t have faith in her now, who would. I looked to Beaufighter and said,
“Get the bomb ready.” Then I looked back at Trash-Chan.
She threw her fist at Firestorm from the side, and it harmlessly passed through. Trash-Chan didn’t stop. Her hand emerged from Firestorm, wholly engulfed in flame, or rather, the trash whip around her hand was completely engulfed in flame. She used the momentum of her first punch to spin around on her heel. She did a complete turn and then gave Firestorm a fiery punch to the stomach. The blow had some force as the off-guard Firestorm went flying out the window. She was potentially out cold, but we didn’t want to take any chances.
“Beaufighter now!” I yelled.
Beaufighter ran past me in a flash. In her hands, she held a bomb with 110 Kg written on the side. She strode halfway across the room before throwing the bomb with all her might.
“A gift from the queen!” she yelled as the bomb crashed through the window as it flew on a trajectory with Firestorm. It exploded outside the building, creating enough force to shake the room where we stood.
Then it was quiet as we all stared out the window.
“You don’t think she’ll come flying back up with a second form or something?” I asked.
“No, we couldn’t fight that!” Raphine exclaimed.
“Don’t worry, I don’t hear any boss music,” Trash-Chan said with a nod.
“It’s okay. An attack like that should leave her unconscious for at least an hour,” Tanaka-san said as he slid down to a seated position on the floor. It looked more like his legs gave out.
“Then… We won!” Trash-Chan yelled. Raphine and Beaufighter cheered while I slid down to the floor, much as Tanaka-san had done. I only now realized how tired I was now that we had won.
We sat there for a few seconds before a voice caught our attention.
“She actually lost?” We turned to look at the guy who had finally stepped out from halfway between the doorway. He looked around the room, which had become battered from the battle, before finally looking at us. The guy fell to his knees.
“So, what do we do with this guy?” Raphine asked.
“It doesn’t look like he wants to fight,” Tanaka-San said.
“Don’t worry, with Firestorm defeated, I’m sure I’ll get turned into the authorities.”
As if on cue, the sounds of helicopters were heard in the distance. The fire that lit the city up had now gone out, and they were circling in the sky. The logos on the side bared the emblem of the Waifu Defense Force.
“Their timing is interesting,” Tanaka-san said.
“Well, I guess if we just leave him here, they will pick him up,” I said.
“Aren’t you worried that he might run, Main-kun? Trash-Chan asked me.
I looked at the guy who stared at the floor and shook my head.
“No, I don’t think he will.”
“Should we try to get more information out of him, Juyo-San?” Tanaka-San asked.
“I told you everything I know already. You should just get away now, or they will try to get you wrapped up in this as well,” the guy said in a forlorn voice.
“Sounds like we better go,” Trash-Chan said as she started to run off. The others tried to follow, but I stayed by.
“Wait, who are ‘they’? Don’t go using vague phrasing.” I said. After all this, I did not want to leave anything hanging.
The man opened his mouth to speak, but he was interrupted by the sound of the elevator beeping. Tanaka-San and I jumped up at the sound, and we all turned to look at the open doors.
An administrator stepped out of the elevator—Kalen, who we had run into earlier.
“Oh, it’s good to see you are all alive!” she said in a cheery voice as she walked over to us. “You did well to take down these two; we can handle the rest. Why don’t you all go home and get some rest? We will contact you later for more details.”
“Hold on, he was about to tell us the mastermind behind all of this,” I said as I turned back to the guy.
“Oh dear, you don’t need to worry yourself with those sorts of things. We have already taken care of everything on our end.”
“What?” I said.
“You see, there was a rogue division of the Waifu Labs that was trying a super waifu experiment. They preyed on him since he was down on his luck and offered him a powerful waifu to rule them all. One thing led to another, and this happened.” Kalen walked next to the guy and put a hand on his shoulder. “Isn’t that right, Guy.”
He looked at Kalen and then looked at me. With a sigh, he nodded his head. It looked like he was trembling a little. He likely realized how much trouble he would be in now that someone was here to turn him in.
“Wait, is his name Guy?” Trash-Chan said, not paying attention to the rest of the conversation.
“No, maybe she doesn’t know his name either,” Raphine speculated.
“His name is Guy,” Beaufighter confirmed.
While the waifu’s we preoccupied with other things, Tanaka-san walked over to where Kalen, Guy, and I were.
“Administrator Kalen, it is good to see you. Why were you not present before the end of the battle?” he asked. Kalen just laughed.
“My dear, I had lots of other things to do first,” she said through chuckles.
“I see,” Tanaka-san said.
“Now, if I recall, you had a waifu who was lost? It looks like you might have two now. I can go ahead and take them off your hands,” Kalen said with a smile.
“Ah, tha-“ I started to say, but Tanaka-san just pulled me aside.
“Wait, Juyo-san, I don’t think we should let Raphine and Beaufighter go with her,” he said with a whisper.
“Tanaka-san, you’re paranoid,” I reassured him with a whisper.
“No, my genre savviness says we can’t just trust someone who should have done something but only shows up at the end of the battle.”
“Your genre savviness also said that Trash-Chan’s new power would bring us victory and that I would have to die.”
“It was only going to be a fake-out death.”
“Look, unless they are our waifus, I don’t think we can do anything.”
“He is indeed right, though if they are you waifus, they can go with you,” Kalen said from the side.
“How did she hear us?” Tanaka-san whispered.
“You’re just not as quiet as you think,” I said back. “Sorry about him. He’s all-in conspiracy mode after everything Guy said earlier,” I said to Kalen.
“Oh, don’t worry about it, that always happens to someone in these sorts of situations. Now, may I ask you too, ladies, to come with me as well?” Kalen said as she effortlessly lifted Guy to his feet. She handcuffed his wrists behind him. His head continued to hang down. Raphine looked at Kalen, then at us, then back to Kalen. Then she looked at Trash-Chan.
“I’ve decided, I’m going to stay with Trash-Chan!” she said, hugging Trash-Chan while the trash-tier waifu tried to push her off. Kalen continued to smile, but it looked like a vein bulged slightly on her forehead.
“That’s sweet dear, but if you’re not someone’s waifu, I have to take you with me… given the situation and all.”
“Wait, I wasn’t finished. I’ve also decided to be Otaku’s waifu!”
“You’re not even going to use the san anymore?” Tanaka-San yelled.
Kalen shook her head with the vein on her forehead showing.
“Well, I guess I can’t argue with that. Well, the other dear can-“
“Beaufighter-“ Guy spat out while slumped over. We all turned to look at him. “Beaufighter is also their waifu. She’s that plain-looking guy’s waifu!” he said while pointing to me.
“Plain looking?” was all I managed to say.
Kalen looked intensely at Guy.
“Now, Guy, are you sure about that?” she asked in an oddly threatening tone. It was a lie, of course, but he just shook his head to indicate yes. I looked over to Tanaka-San, who was rubbing his hand on his chin. I had no idea why he was lying, but I decided to let it go. It didn’t matter who went with Kalen or not.
Kalen sighed. She began to push Guy to the elevator.
“Well, see you later, Taikutsu Juyo and Taku Tanaka,” was all she said before the elevator doors shut and they were gone. It felt like the air cleared as soon as they left. I felt weakness in my legs and had to sit down again. I leaned back against a wall. It would be nice to be able to sleep in a proper bed once we got back.
“Main-kun! Are you okay? Don’t tell me; you’re actually going to die!” Trash-Chan ran over and began to shake my shoulder violently.
“No, Main-kun, we didn’t know each other long, but I thought of you as a brother,” Raphine said with a tear rolling down her cheek. I let out an angry sigh.
“Stop you two; I just had to sit down.”
“Oh, well…” Trash-Chan said.
Beaufighter chuckled.
“You lot are all right. We will have to meet up again.”
“Do you plan to go somewhere?” Tanaka-san asked.
“Indeed, I wonder why Guy said that. I smell a mystery that needs solving!”
“A mystery…” I said.
“Yes, my good sir, there is nothing more satisfying than a mystery. I need to get my old partner back and get on this case!”
“Alright… Well, let me give you my number so we can exchange notes,” Tanaka-san said. After they exchanged contact information, Beaufighter took to the sky and flew out the shattered window. She gave a wave goodbye as she flew off.
I pushed myself off the floor. My legs wobbled a little, and I stumbled. Trash-Chan caught my arm until I caught my footing. I looked at everyone left in the room: Raphine, Tanaka-san, and Trash-Chan.
“Let’s go home,” I said with a small smile.
“Yeah!” they all yelled.
“Why did you all yell in unison?” I asked.
“It just felt right, Main-Kun,” Trash-Chan said.
“It’s just the thing to do,” Tanaka-san said.
“I was just following Trash-Chan,” Raphine said.
I sighed.
“Let’s just go home,” I said.
“Yeah!” they all yelled together.