Chapter Sixty
It was dark. The silence that entangled everything had a strange, chaotic chord within it, and Viktoriya felt it. Every ounce of the darkness was beckoning her toward it, almost like a pull that could she could not neglect.
She had learned to command the visions. Learned to lie on her bed and close her eyes.
Two deep breaths and a clear mind. Behind her closed eyes, she would envision what she hoped to see, the Spectrum, and the beautiful universe.
Wherever it was, it had changed her. She did not consider it a burden. It did not seem like a curse. Alien, perhaps? Yes. But bad? Not at all. She loved the wonder and beauty surrounding the Spectrum, with all its hidden knowledge and discoveries waiting for her to unlock.
And so, like every other day, she lay down, took a deep breath, then another, calming herself. And there it was, but something different. Something that felt out of place. Pulling her softly toward it as though everything shouted the presence of danger. But what could be dangerous? What could harm her here, inside her own mind?
I’m, I’m moving too fast. I’m falling! Am I falling?
It was all some subconscious transportation as far as she knew, and if anything happened, she would only wind up back in her body unscathed.
“Viktoriya!” a voice echoed out and vibrated throughout her consciousness, almost as if it was vastly reverberating throughout the darkness.
Her heart spiked. Her eyes snapped open. She turned swiftly and looked, but was still met with total darkness, even though she now expected to see her room.
The booming sound sending chills down her spine as she could not help but think about how exposed she was.
“Oh, shit! You scared me! Who are you? Who are you?” she yelped.
Her whole body trembled. She strained her eyes, trying to catch a flicker of anything. A gleam that someone was lurking in the darkness, but nothing.
“Viktoriya,” the voice rebounded. She was so absorbed in attempting to locate the source of the sound, she had not wondered how unfamiliar it was for her to hear a voice here on the Spectrum.
“Who are you?” she spoke to no one, turning and searching through the distant glow.
There was stillness again. She could feel the quiet staring back at her. She had not learned how to pull herself out yet, so she turned, waiting for the vision to push her out.
“Who’s there?” she queried again, but the same quiet answered her. The quiet made all the hairs on her body stand on end.
She took a deep breath, then another.
No one can hurt you.
It’s all in your subconscious.
No harm can come to you.
The mental reprimand worked for a while, but she still felt the need to hide behind something or, at the very least, discover a way to see what was staring back.
“I, I know I am not talking to myself. Not speaking to myself, within my own mind. You have an unfamiliar voice, different from my own. And even though you only said my name, I am not imagining you… you’re real. Right?”
“So, tell me. What… what is your name?” she would not relent.
She remained aloft, slowly turning, as though there was a vortex setting her in motion. Almost as if she was gazing at the night sky and speaking to the stars, like in those books about ancient princesses. But no, those were only fairy-tales.
This was not.
This was one of her subconscious transportations, and this time, there was someone else involved. Something that had mentioned her name. Called her from the deep.
“Your voice, it differs from mine. I know for a truth you are real. If you are trying to scare me, you’ve failed.”
She said the words more to herself than to the speaking darkness as she braced herself for what would emerge, but there was nothing still. She brushed her hands against her arm, soothing the already agitated skin. It felt like she’d bathed in her fear and stiffened under the scrutiny of the darkness.
“Fine. Maybe I am a little scared,” she muttered shallowly.
“Interesting,” the voice replied, sending another wave of that insufferable chill down her spine.
She thought perhaps the being could only summon a single word over a particular amount of time, but she ran a calculation between when she had first called her name, the second time, and now. She quickly dismissed the thought from her mind.
If they knew about the Spectrum, they might somehow be responsible for her gift.
“Why did you show me?” she asked, even though what seemed to be the terrible attempt at a conversation was not going anywhere.
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After what seemed like a prolonged pause, the voice erupted again. “You are different. Special.”
She heard the silence between her and whoever or whatever was speaking. The only sound that echoed loudly was her heart throbbing hard.
“Your consciousness is more profoundly connected to the Spectrum than most.”
She opened her mouth to speak again, but closed it as the voice came thundering from all corners.
“You are aware because you have the ability to be aware, unlike others.”
It was like a jiggered puzzle. One that the pieces were continuously changing at will. Something that felt like utter nonsense, trying to conceive in the light of sense.
“What does that even mean?” she asked. For the first time, she realized her palms had left her arms where they had so firmly gripped a moment ago.
“The consciousness of the others is unmalleable and too rigid to comprehend and understand the Spectrum. You are a singularity, alone on your planet, capable of receiving and giving through the Spectrum.”
She did not know why, but suddenly, she felt that need to wrap herself in her own embrace once again. It was as though that wind of terror was back, and she felt her skin ridden with goosebumps and her hands desperately trying to keep her exposed parts protected from the cold that now encased her.
“Who. Are. You?” she asked again, realizing the being had never told her a name.
She had analyzed from the voice that it was feminine, in a way, if she was to use gender for the sound. But the way it spoke told her it was not of her world.
You are the only one on your planet. She recalled the specifics of the words used. She was the only one on her planet yet; here it was, speaking to her. Where was it from, she wondered.
Had it been watching her all along? Was it watching her now? What could it do to her?
Her heart throbbed, and her knees felt weak, threatening to fail her.
“Who are you?” she asked again. Her tone was raspy now, and there was a glimmer of fear behind those bright eyes, a trembling in her voice that could be because of the cold or the anticipation of something terrible to come.
“You. Us. We. We are all the same. The same family. We are light in the universe.”
As the voice spoke, she could almost swear the light glowed brighter.
“We are consciousnesses and beings of order and the creative essence of the universe. Therefore, we can enfold and embrace one another through the Spectrum. Through all the creation, seeing that we too are creators.”
She paused. She had counted her words, puzzling to see if there was a rhythm or code in the message. Trying to understand what exactly the being was telling her, whoever it was, and the meaning, if there was any.
“This is no mathematical statement here, Viktoriya.”
“Are there others, then? Are there those that are not part of the light? Darkness, perhaps? Not creators, but those of chaos and disorder?” she asked.
But there was no answer.
“Those that defy the creative essence? Destroyers?” she stammered.
Viktoriya continued defiantly, saying, “Whoever, wherever you are! I have seen with my eyes the elements of the creation, the ballet of all that exists. From before time and the beginning darkness to the overwhelming brilliant light. Intertwined and in constant vibration, flowing with the expansion and contraction of the universe, the ebb and flow of all things.”
She could have sworn she heard a heartbeat for a moment, but there was nothing other than the swift voice that felt like water cutting through the wind.
“Viktoriya, it is for this reason I have sought after you here and now. In this very time and space. Those of chaos and disorder in darkness surely exist. It is as I sense and see that you already understand this. For light to exist, there must also be darkness. But as two ends of the coin cannot meet, these cannot comprehend the Spectrum, since the life-energy is of order and the creative essence of the universe.”
She braced herself.
Something was coming.
With every passing word, she could feel that every sentence was driving to something.
It was the shuddering that had embraced her once she had arrived. It was the reason this voice was here. But what was it?
“They have forever, always sought, and continue now, seeking to extinguish the flame that brightens the darkness.”
“They want to destroy me and… and end us?” she asked.
“They wish to end. They wish to destroy the Spectrum out of spite. For the hatred of their inability to comprehend it. They seek chaos, disorder, and destruction, even to their own end. The End of All.”
It all felt like there was more coming.
Like a growing burden on her shoulders and the only way she could get it out was to press for more questions, and she opened her mouth again.
“Viktoriya, there has been an awakening of one of those ancients. One there now, even on your planet. You must have sensed the ripple, the chaos of its presence by now.”
She slowly nodded.
She had indeed felt something.
The entire day had felt off-balance, and coming here, there was this strange aura that clogged everything.
“Yes, I did, I felt something.”
“The intention is to destroy your ark. To ensure that your race comes to an end. The End of All. Only you can save your people, Viktoriya. Only you know the way.”
“I can barely summon myself here and out. What are you even talking about? I can’t save anyone!” she protested.
“You have more control than you realize. The Spectrum is a life energy, residing and intertwining those of its essence. You must stop The End of All from destroying the ark, your lifeline.”
Her chest heaved.
She heard the words.
Spectrum.
Different.
The End of All.
The ark. Again and again. The phrases echoed inside her head as the voice continued to speak. She focused on her breath, trying to breathe as Dr. Maribelle taught her in their sessions.
She felt emboldened, and a flame of passion rising within her.
She was going to save the world.
Going to care for the ark they built.
The flaming sensation intensified, and for a moment, she felt it, like a pounding heart and a flesh of its own inside of her.
It was a wind of rage coursing through the Spectrum and the silence that hovered around her.
“Yes, Viktoriya, you are seeing everything as it is. The world as it unfolds, and the universe as it expands. You have a very profound connection to the Spectrum, much more than many others, which is why you and humanity are of great threat to these of darkness. You must go, now! You can save your people because you believe you can.”
“Thanks, Miss Spectrum, umm… lady, I have to go and stop this thing right now! Wait, you are a lady, right? Right?”
“Oh, and wait! Do I know your language, or are we communicating in English? What’s the, umm. How are we speaking?”
“We are creative consciousness, giving and receiving through the Spectrum as a shared universal embrace. And you may call me Xiin. But you must focus and leave now!”
Viktoriya was pushing her desires aside and summoning all her strength.
She would prevail; she would overcome The End of All.
She could do this.
“I can do this.”
“You must not linger any longer; time is of the essence. The longer it continues, the stronger it becomes. Its impact on the Spectrum, you can already sense. They now contaminate the wind of the universe with rage, chaos, and the noise of darkness.”
It was then that she saw it.
A stream of fiery greenish-black smoke, winding through the galaxy. The fury that burned with it, and a sound of despair.
The dark aura.
She could do this.
She could save the people, and now that she had proven her vision of Spectrum travel to be true, she knew they would listen.
They would not doubt her as they had before.
They would listen.
They would finally listen.