“Hey Love, grab the whiskey!” dad yells out to mom. “Richard, that’s the last bottle that we have” mom says back to dad. “Yes. And now is the best time for it. My little buddy has learned everything I can teach him about living in the wilderness. This is cause for celebration!” he yells out to the whole world.
“That’s great and all, but shouldn’t you wait until he’s at a good age to actually drink it?” my mom retorts back at him. “Nonsense. He can have some now, I’m sure we’ll find something even better for the bigger occasions” he smiles back at her.
“Love, he’s only eleven” she looks at him sincerely. “It’s okay, plus it’ll help him get some good sleep” he stares at her back. “Fine” she gives.
That was the most disgusting thing I’ve ever drunk in my life. But now everything seems lighter and a tad fluffy. The fire crackles along with our laughing. My parents become all smoochy and touchy. I look up to the foggy sky, barely able to make out the glittering stars up above. I hear some large twigs snapping in the woods around us and I look to see a large shadow move around the trees.
My dad stands up, “Love, I’ll be right back”. He turns and looks at me with a smile and a wink. The shadow comes up behind him and bashes him to the side, he slams into a nearby tree with a loud thud. My mom lets out a shriek as the bear comes into the light of the fire. Its attention caught be the noise, it brings its focus to her. She backs away slowly while trying to stay quiet and calm, only to trip on a rock and fall to the ground. The bear stands on its hind legs then comes back down with force on top of her chest. All I can hear is the bones inside her chest crack and bust, her body ceases any movement. I sit there staring, unable to move. Not a single muscle listens to my brain.
I turn my head towards a grunting sound as my dad picks himself off the ground. The bear loses interest in mom and goes back to dad. My brain screams at him, at the bear, at mom. The bear saunters over to dad and slaps him against the tree again. Several bones let out a audible snap, dad lets out a painful moan. The bear grab a clump of clothing with its mouth and launches him into the darkness. ‘Noooo!’ tears stream down my face. The bear then turns to me and slowly makes its way towards me. My body stiffens but doesn’t budge an inch. ‘Noooo! God, no!’ the bear raises its paw and swings.
Every muscle in my body jolts in fear. I try to shrink my body in as much as I can but something is restricting my movements. Someone pets my head, “It’s okay, you’re safe here”. As my mind begins to calm, I can hear thumping from a heartbeat. I slowly and quietly pull my head away from the person’s chest and notice it being soaked wet, as well as my clothes and the sheets. I raise my head and see the girl, Ava, that I met today in front of me. She worriedly smiles at me “you okay now?”. I look past her to the doorway full of people. All of them are paled and slightly sweaty, some have a face full of fear, while others are silently crying.
I barely can ketch some of their mutterings, “Is it possible?” “There’s no other explanation” “But how?” “Tomorrow is going to be a busy day”.
----------- Earlier that Day ---------
We walk down a series of stairs going down underneath the earth. I’m in the middle of the two, the girl in front and the woman behind me. There wasn’t much at the entrance, just some rubber boots and raincoats with a bench to sit down on. The stairs wrapped around against the wall while having a ten foot clearance down the center with cables hanging down. There seemed to be a gate connected to the railing at the beginning platform, but you would have fallen quite the distance if you opened it.
“Where are we?” I ask quietly. “Where?” the girl in front stopped and turned around to look at me. “The was a nuclear shelter that was owned by the military before someone bought it and turned it into a research lab” the girl smiles while explaining, seemingly happy to talk to someone new and of her age.
“Ava” the woman behind me says curtly. “What?” the girl says as dispearingly as possible, “It’s not like he couldn’t figure that out soon enough once we got down there” she gives off a smile mischievously.
“Oh Yeah!” she abrupts says out loud “We forgot our introductions. My name’s Ava, and she’s Mary, my caretaker. What’s your name?”.
“Name” I mouth out silently, ‘that’s something I haven’t in forever’. “Um... “ I stand there for a moment trying to remember, “Oh, Adam’s my name”. I could feel the woman narrow her eyes at me, then shrug. Ava looks at me confused then smile, “Adam… well Adam, welcome to our home”. I just shrug my shoulders, as we continue our descent
To go back to my first question, the bunker wasn’t what I was asking. “What town are we in?” I ask again. “Hmm, you don’t know?” she stops and turns again while tilting her head, ‘cute… wait.. what?”.
She straightens back up, “We’re just outside of Mattawa in Washington state. Feel free to ask me anything while we eat” she turns around smiling. A hint of gleefulness washes off me. I ponder on these recent emotions that seem like a foreign entity within my body. They aren’t mine, but I can’t figure out how they’re there if they’re not mine.
We come to a big metal door with a wheel attached to it. ‘I faintly remember this from submarine pictures?’ I run through my earliest memories that I can only remember fragments of while Mary walks forward to spin the wheel around. The wheel comes to a stop, air begins hissing out as the huge door slowly swings out. Ava walks into the small room behind the threshold and turns around to gesture me in.
I walk in and Mary pulls the door closed and starts turning the wheel back. The a loud hissing, then jets of air shoot out from the ceiling, startling me. Ava begins to giggle, “Don’t worry, the chamber’s just pressurizing to the levels of inside and cleansing any germs we might have on us”. I just stare back at her blankly.
The next area behind the door, one would expect to be a hallway, but instead was a big room with a rather strange layout. There was a few feet indention for the door, but you can’t really call that a hallway. The was a clear indication of a pathway through the center of the room to the next door. Fake railing counters that reached almost to your chest lined followed several feet past the opening of the room that continued the wall on both sides. Then in the center of the room had a counter that was in the shape of a hollow square with the pathway continued through the center. The room looked symmetrical from the four corners excluding the center counter, only have one line through the middle.
Beds and machines, fridges filled with bottle and vials filled the walls. I stood there in shock, looking around the room in wonder. “Impressive right? Bet you haven’t seen anything like this out there right!” Ava boasts about her home out loud at me. “Enough, Ava” Mary rubs her eyes with her fingertips.
“First, let’s give you some injections, just in case. I’d prefer not to waste what we don’t have to, but I have to be prepared more than anything else” she speaks to the open air. She guides me to one of the closer beds, then walks over to a fridge nearby.
“Guess I should ask if you’re okay with me giving you some shots?” she looks over to me while opening the fridge door. I shrug “If it’s what gets me food. I can only trust that it’s not going to be poison”. ‘And well, if it does kill me, it kills me. At least I’ll be able to rest from this life’. “Poison?!” Ava exclaims from beside me “Why would be poison someone that just saved us?” she pouts at my statement.
As Ava rambles on about something, I watch Mary grab some gaze and turn around out of our sight. She raises her shirt up and starts dabbing the gaze to her body. I flinch at the pain that suddenly shoots through my brain. Ava notices my reaction and turns to see where my gaze target resides. She sees the bloody gaze the Mary tosses into the trash can, she quickly gets up and runs over to her “Mom! Are you alright?”. From what I can make out, there isn’t enough blood to be spilling all over the place but there is a substantial amount to soak the gaze.
Ava starts trying to prod at the wound but Mary slaps her hand away. “It’s nothing to be concerned about” she points at the syringe, “but since you want to help so much now, go give him shot. It’s a broad spectrum antibiotic, should work on whatever he could have inside his body. Now leave me alone while I bandage this up”. She shoos away the troublemaker.
Ava pouts while she comes towards me, then she puts on a evil grin while she looks at me. “Time for your shots” she giggles at me. “Now roll up your sleeve, it’ll go into the side of your upper arm” she begins to pull on some disposable rubber gloves.
“You know, not to be mean or anything, but you kinda stink. You should have a shower before we eat, wouldn’t want to ruin everyone else’s meal too” she cutely skrunks up her nose ‘what? Again?’.
She dabs a gaze with liquid in a clear bottle, I barely ketch the name on the bottle ‘rubbing alcohol’. She gently grabs my arm with one hand, then roughly begins to rub the gaze over my arm “Just got to clean and sterilize a spot for the needle, and it’ll only feel like a heavy prick. Shouldn’t hurt to much for the big man, now should it?”.
‘Is she trying to tease me, joke with me, or make fun of me? Either way, she’s quite friendly with a stranger’ I can only ponder as she tries to rub away the years of grime and crusted skin. She continues to try and press and scrape harder until I place my other hand on top of her hand. “Why won’t it come off?” she looks puzzled into my eyes. I give her a light smile, “That’s because that’s my skin, not dirt”. “But” she looks at her own clean, clear skin. “It’s due to the radiations expose to my body, it’s actually more of a surprise to see clean people these days” I say as I let go of her hand. “He’s right, radiation poisoning has various different effects on the human body, but one of the common conditions is cancerous looking skin. But who knows, maybe we’ll be able to treat those symptoms in the future” Mary explains as she wraps herself in bandages and pulls her shirt back down. “Thanks, but this is who I am. I would be a stranger to my self if I were to change” I press my lips together.
“Ready?” Ava raises up the syringe up to my arm. I nod and she stabs me with the needle. I don’t even flinch, “Oh mister tough guy can take a needle uh. I hate injections” she pouts. ‘Oh.. Is that the reason for that behaviour? Get someone new to experience her pain’ I snort quietly.
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“Alright, let’s go get you a shower and some clean clothes. Also, may I see your pack, bow, and quiver?” Mary walks up and reaches her hand out. I narrow my eyes and subconsciously take a step back. A polite smirk forms across her face, “Don’t worry, I’m not taking them from you. I just can’t have you running around with a weapon in the labs. You’ll get them back when you leave”. I stand there for several moments until finally I give, though instead of handing them to her, I walk over to the door and set them in the corner. Mary shrugs as I walk back to them, “Whatever”.
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I stand, leaned against the wall of the shower cell, letting the warm water cascade off of me. I stare down as I watch the water slowly turn from a brown tint into a more clear color. My body goes through cycles of shivering, then fiery sweat pouring out. Waves of nauseous sweeps my head multiple times, some of them become so bad that I begin to dry heave. I sit down on the floor, let the water splashes me in the face and chest as I ride the train of discomfort.
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“Took you long enough in there, did you fall asleep? I’m starving now, let’s go” Ava demands as she pulls me by the arm. ‘You probably haven’t the slightest idea of what starvation feels like’ I give off a thought. “Huh… Did you say something?” Ava looks back to me. I give a confused look, “no”.
We walk through a series of hallways, passing by many rooms, ranging from smaller to bigger ones. A couple of the rooms had someone working at a desk or counter with illuminated screens. Some of them glanced back at us, only to give me a weird look (What’s he doing here?). We walked down a shiny white tinted floor that was capable of some reflections. Each of the wall were a smooth white material, it doesn’t look weak ‘I’d probably break my fist if I tried to punch it’. It felt like we were walking through tubes of white, much like the rats they probably have.
“Where are you taking me? Where’s the food?” I ask quietly, not even sure if she heard me. “We’ll get some food soon” she looks back at me with a giggly face “But first I have to take you to meet the chief scientist, which is basically our leader now”. I raise my eyebrow, ‘I can understand wanting to make sure I wasn’t a threat, but why aren’t any guards escorting me’.
She just smiles at me “He just wants to make sure you’re a good person”. I shake my head inwardly, ‘She’s way too naive of the outside’.
We reach a long hallway where I see two men standing against the walls towards the center of the tube. We walk up to the two that actually look like proper guards and stop in front of them. “We’re here to see the chief” Ava demands at them. She smiles at them when one of them rolls their eyes as they press on their ear.
“He’s ready for you” the guard to our right notions us forward. A foot behind them, there’s a gap in the square tube, looking like an elevator entrance. We proceed to the double doors at the end of the hallway. As we open the doors, we enter into a decent sized room. Bookshelves full of books on opposite walls to the sides, pictures and whiteboards line the back wall, and a desk with two chairs facing in front a in the center. A man stands to the left side of the room, rummaging through a couple of books.
“Welcome! Come and have a seat, we have some Things to discuss” he twists around an gestures to the chairs in front of the desk. He closes the book in his hand and places it halfway back onto the shelf so that it’ll be easy to grab it again. Ava takes a seat on the left chair, leaving me to the right one. The ‘chief’ walks over to the side of the desk and leans against it while still looking at the bookshelves.
“So you’re the child Mary has told me about?” he glances at me while moving to his own chair behind the desk. “Forgive me if I don’t shake your hand, I’ve been known to be easily susceptible to illness. I try to keep to myself as much as possible. But first I do want to give my thanks for intervening when you did in the earlier struggle, not many would do anything of the such these days. Mary is a valuable part of this program these days, would be such a loss to lose her. As such, I will grant this gesture that Ava has proposed, while also adding one more just to ease the debt. Course, you don’t have to accept, I’m sure you have Very important things on the outside waiting for you” he smirks while making the snide remark.
I frown at him, “It would depend on what this option is” I state, annoyed. “Simply, just for you to stay here for the night. I’m sure it’s hard getting a good night sleep out there. Here, you could get a warm dinner, warm bed, and not have to worry about someone attacking you in your sleep” he puts his hands together.
“And how would you even be able to guarantee such an action?” I question him coldy. “We’re not a bunch of barbarians Adam” Ava pouts at me, but the chief raises his palm to her. “I do have quite the degree of influence here, but that’s not one hundred percent for you, is it? People can be rogue elements. Word is also only air to someone that doesn’t know or trust another.” he shrugs “But like I said, it’s up to you”. He gets up from his chair and walks over to the painting on the wall right behind him, it’s different from what you usually see. Two thick lines spiraling down with horizontal lines connecting the two vertical lines.
He turns back towards us, “I don’t know if anyone told you yet, but unprovoked or unsanctioned violence is punishable by exile, so these geniuses probably won’t do anything. And I also have security cameras all over this facility”.
“What are you?” I ask him. “Ooo… That’s privileged information. But I can tell you what we’re not, we aren’t the government. We began as a private organization, but well… money has no purpose anymore. Now we are this” he raises his hands up in a grand gesture.
I just give a small nod, “Fine, I’ll stay the night” I turn to Ava “Can we eat now?”. The chief gives out a laugh, “Food… tames him. Go, I’ll see to it an area is set up for you tonight”.
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We finally get to a giant room filled with good smells and lots of tables. Ava leads me towards the area radiating with fragrance. We grab some plates and continue down the line of prepared food. I grab some meat, potatoes, and a mixture of vegetables.
“So what does Mary, your mom?, do.” I ask simply to Ava as we sit down at a small table. “Mom? Well she isn’t my biological mother, but been my caretaker for years now. She was a part of the security team when I first came here. Then she came to look after me once my actual mom stopped coming”. Ava started to explain, not seeming sad though. ‘Must have been a long time since. Maybe separated at the beginning of the war’ I pondered a moment.
“What about you? Are you alone?” she asks with a slight worry to her eyes, afraid to step on a mine. I recall a dream I have often, one of many that tears away at my soul day by day. “They’ve been gone for years now. The world doesn’t care about your emotions in the wasteland, so you just have to keep move or waste away” I look down and give a small shrug. Silence lingers a while as we eat.
We edge closer to getting done with our food when I ask, “You said you’ve been here for a while. What is your part here exactly? Scientist I can see being hold up underground in the apocalypse, but a child?”.
“I was very sick when I was taken to the hospital. I had developed a tumor in my prefrontal cortex, it was inoperable. I was brought here because they said they had a way to treat it, and well I haven’t died yet” she gives me a cute smile. We finish off our meal and walk around the halls a little.
All we do is mill around at random, as everything is a ‘secret’ here. Most of the doors are closed, the ones that aren’t usually have a person working at a desk. We walk by a couple of long windows showing rooms of either machinery around a chair or counters filled with sciency things. I just continue to follow Ava mindlessly.
“And this is my room!” she exclaims as she opens the door. The first thing I notice when I enter is, it is filled with beautiful looking flowers. If I didn’t feel the same as usual, only burning up a little more than usual, I would think that I did die and went to heaven. I had almost all but forgotten what flowers and their smell was like.
“What’s up with all the flowers? I can imagine a few, but there’s…” I cut myself off. “What?!” she asks curtly “These are my friends. I talk to them everyday”. I raise my hands up in defense, “Okay…”.
She smiles at my reaction, “But if you like it… You can have this one” she hands me one that has a vibrant purple that almost boasts about itself. She then grabs a notebook from the small table next to her bed and sits down on the ground. She starts writing things down on the paper and murmuring to herself. I just sit down quietly in front of her and examine the newly found plant in front of me.
I look up to the girl that’s now laying on her belly while swaying her legs up in the air as she hums away a song long forgotten in my brain. I see her drawing scribbles within her notebook.
“What exactly are we doing?” I ask her while bored out of my mind. “We’re hanging out, killing time, spending quality time together. It’s been such a long time, I almost forgot how fun in was to hang out with someone” she says nonchalantly while still scribbling things into her notebook.
What does that even supposed to mean? “With someone… weren’t there a bunch of people that we past by” I ask her. She gives a sigh like it’s the end of the word, “But they’re adults. I mean being with someone around my age. The hasn’t been another kid around for a couple years now. So this is what we’ll do to form a proper relationship” she smiles up to me.
‘What am I even doing here? This is not like me, to be pulled in by a bunch of strangers. Why did I even intervene in the first place? I am alone. I’ve had no one, I don’t need anyone any more. Everything’s abandoned me already… no… maybe I’m just scared now, rejection tears at me more than the other. That wasteland has taught me only one thing, to live and die alone. My civility died along with my parents that night. I don’t belong anywhere anymore’.
She tilts her head side to side as she hums another song of hers.
“Why?”I whisper out a question on accident. But she replies back randomly, “I don’t know… maybe if you stay here long enough, I’ll be able to tell you” I look at her coldly “I don’t know what fantasy's you’ve dreamt up, but I’m alone. I’ve been alone, doing my own thing for years. I have my own rules to live by, not some sheltered people’s rules that doesn’t know or understand how hard it is to live and survive out there. I’m only alive today because a bit of luck in the beginning and a whole lot of pain to learn by”. I stupidly take out my inward anger out on her. She stares back at me shocked and sad, trying to keep back some tears. “I’m sorry” she whispers out. “No… I just don’t… belong anymore” I get up and walk out of her room.
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“Oh, that’s where you went off too” Mary finds me at the first big room from the entrance, the only place that’s alone and easily able to find. “It’s dinner time, let’s go to the cafeteria” she tries to usher me to the door.
“I’m still full. Unlike some people, I’ve learned to deal with going without food for a week straight” I reply coldly, still in my brooding mood. Mary gives out a deep sigh, “At least let me show you to the room you’ll be staying in for the night”.
“I’m fine with right here if it’s all the same to you. Just bring me back my stuff” I say as I keep laying on the bed I’ve been on for the past couple hours. “God” Mary mutters out quietly “It’s hard enough dealing with one teenager, I don’t need another”.
She walks over to the bed, “Come one”. I give her a weak smile as she approaches, “I actually don’t really have the energy to move right now”.
“Your skin is so pale right now, and you’re burning up. How are you even sweating right now?” she puts on some gloves quickly and begins touching my forehead and skin all around. It takes me years back to my innocent childhood when my mom used to look after me at home, I tear up a bit.
“Why didn’t you say anything earlier?” she asks me with concern. “Well for one, it didn’t really hit until I was here alone. And I’m used to fighting everything alone, even sickness” I look away from her. The next thing I know, she’s picking me up in her arms. “Wow, that’s not good at all. You’re way to light for your size” she states as she carries me with ease.
She carries me to a small room and sets me down on the bed. “You know, she was really hurt by what you said earlier” Mary scolds me while she sits next to me on the temporary bed, which is a cot. “Reality hurts, this whole planet is hurting. Nothing changes by having fluffy feelings, imagining and waiting for a happy ending. The world is rotting away while you people sit here and play make believe. So tell me, what’s harsher? A blatant truth that helps make a change, or a fluffy lie that rots a soul?” I look at her with inquisitive eyes. She sits beside me silently while going through a range of emotions on her face.
“I’ve got to say, that’s the most I heard you talk in the whole day” she settles for a moment “you’re a lot more intelligent than I first pegged you to be”. I shrug my shoulders, “Intelligence isn’t something unique, everything has it. It’s the question of how you use it to your advantage”. She gets up from the bed, “mmm” she starts towards the door then pauses then begins again “well anyway, good night” she walks out the door.