The whole performance had packed up quickly since the performance, an awkward feeling presiding over those present. Mhyl had left the room quickly after, yet discovered Lwyn was no where to be found.
Lwyn was actually on the roof at the time, pondering her thoughts on her own. She had known there would be a time when she would just simply find herself no longer fitting in. She thought back to the many days it had been so far. While a mutual circumstance had brought them together, all of them had grown on their own from it, in their own ways. It built upon them who they themselves really were. It had felt like they had been together in fact for an eternity as a result, with how close everything had grown, but that too was naught but an illusion.
From there, they had gone a long distance, with her trailing in their shadows, clinging to their coattails. She had been able to revel their victories and struggled through their failures. Theirs, not really her own. Her's was only a life of struggle, that's all it had ever been. Pretending she was going to be okay had done her well so far, there was a few things she could contribute at first. Spending herself to keep the team happy endlessly had driven them forwards through things near the start, though eventually she had found herself replaced in many of those tasks. She had mostly just... been there.
She was there when Thanrie had gotten hurt, unable to do a thing but go along for the whole agony. There, she had been the most useful, her false energy almost seemed to have spent itself in that incident. But, as things improved, she got better at pretending she herself had also recovered, that she herself was doing better. They had managed a few things after that with her around, after opening the facility she sat upon. It was even on this very roof where she had to fight Hammer-face, and instead of claiming victory, she had failed. She herself was left crushed, physically and emotionally, as others had to clean up after her own failure. That was when her despair had begun to really set in, as she laid there attempting to heal.
Then she was told some of her supposed family heritage. It sounded like a fairy tale to her, to be honest. She still didn't fully believe it, but had gone along with the ride. A myth that a half-elf like her could be important sounded more fabricated than anything. Instead, it felt like people were putting her in a seat of importance, something she could only let them down on in the future. She was and will always be the most expendable, no matter what stories others came up with out of convenience.
When Mhyl got hurt, she got to see just how much being considered important was a destiny designed to fail. Nothing imparted in that moment showed anything of value in putting her on such a pedestal. She could scarcely believe how useless she was getting by that point, and it had started to tear her apart. Still, Mhyl had gotten better regardless, and had scolded them for not sharing how they had all felt. Lwyn felt kinda bad, for not having shared all of her growing concerns so far, but it would only burden them further if they had to deal with that too.
It was in fact at that point where Mhyl had started to shine, and when Lwyn had started to really feel like her spot was lost completely. She was good at so many things, it was astonishing.. and actually intimidating. Mhyl had started to appear as a symbol of greatness within the team, almost a hero in her own right, and Lwyn had started to feel her own illusion of value begin to fade quickly. Her singing, her dancing, her athletics.. Lwyn was fairly certain Mhyl could probably fight well enough if she actually tried. Mhyl probably just wasn't familiar with a style she felt suited to.
It wasn't like she was alone in this. Thanrie had been doing so well actually for a while before. Mhyl had seemed to only make Thanrie improve even more so after her own recovery. The two together were a marvel to witness, something fading beyond Lwyn's own reach. And for a time, it felt as if the only coattail she could still hold on to was Qheria's. However, then Qheria had suddenly decided to save the one person who was most expendable, taking herself down instead. Lwyn still had no idea why that had even happened. Thanrie had seemed at a loss as well, but Mhyl had quickly managed to provide enough support to restore Thanrie to her potential and greatness.
When Qheria had woken up, she herself seemed to have learned the ways of great people at some point, and had started to move beyond Lwyn's reach. Just the day after, she was suddenly doing amazingly well. Thanrie might have worried about the value of her own participation in their sports competition, but Lwyn had noticed just how much she had let her team down. Unable to bring much value to anything going on, even though she was one of the ones with a degree of experience. She had let everyone down, left Thanrie to suffer in the loss, and thus they had been defeated. Then, right after, she had tried to fit her own ability in with everyone in a musical performance, and had found herself unable to keep up at all.
Everyone was well beyond her reach now, she was unable to help them at all. In fact, her presence would most likely cause them more failures like the sports event, just with more seriousness. They wanted her on a pedestal, but she could never pull that off, no matter how much she pretended to have any actually real talent. No one needed her around anymore, and everyone would be better off if she wasn't. Mhyl could always learn Izhaethyx from .. honestly almost anyone else, she had even had many others already translate for her. There was no longer any point in keeping up this facade, and plenty of reasons to move on.
She decided that tonight would be the best opportunity. As she was accustomed to, she herself was already ready to leave at any time. She had a kit she had made herself with her own stuff in it, some foodstuff, enough to manage on her own for a while. She knew she also couldn't take some of this stuff that wasn't truthfully her own, her outfit, weapons, even the gloves. She would leave them all behind, and find her own way. Though, that might be a good place to start. Maybe she should slip into the factory, find something she could use for herself, that she found for herself. The place was pretty much devoid of it's usual residents, having been wiped out. She could slip in, find a few basic things she would need, and then move on.
She would probably follow the river back to the mountains after that, though it really didn't matter. There was no place that she really belonged to, after all. In all honestly, if this trip was to be her last, that didn't bother her either. It wasn't as if she was worth worrying about. Her kind had no destiny but to die a life of failure, so.. maybe the sooner the better.
Having gained her resolve, she made some last minute preparations over dinner. She had caught Mhyl looking for her, but not once did Mhyl bother looking up. Her headset didn't help with it either, she had left it off because the place already had a lot of activity, using it to find one person in this mess wouldn't have helped for anything. Lwyn succeeded in getting changed and ready, giving some silent parting wishes to first the possessions she was leaving behind right there, and then as she headed out.. to also the people she was running from. With that completed, she headed for the door.
Mhyl saw for a quick moment the shadows of some coattails fluttering in the wind, as the door closed upon them. She made her way to the door, just as Thanrie rushed up to her. "What happened to Lwyn, I have a really really bad feeling, where is she?" Thanrie proved her bad feelings by pulling out Lwyn's gloves and crossbow, which she had found discarded when she had slipped into the room to relax. She certainly wasn't relaxing right now. Mhyl ran for the door, and turned on her headset. Off in the distance, one lone person, fairly short, travelling away from them. "That was her, she... she's ran away." Mhyl started for the door in a panic.
Qheria stepped in at this point. "Lets not lose our heads. A rescue team that isn't prepared is certain to fail. Thanrie, go get all of our weapons and gear, stuff we might need from our rooms. Mhyl, go check with Aelyiq and grab some medical supplies and anything else quick that could help us, just make sure to keep it quick and easy to travel with. I'll go secure us some food stocks, having food supplies already prepared will let us travel faster, and I bet you Lwyn already thought ahead there. Meet back here lightning quick, we don't have any time to waste." Qheria ran off after providing directions and instructions, heading to the food stocks to acquire what she could.
Thanrie returned to the room she had found Lwyn's stuff abandoned in. She got everyone's weapons and some of the regular stuff they had travelled around with. She then out of instinct checked Lwyn's closet and found it full of every outfit, plus one discarded dirty. Lwyn had done laundry today, none of her clothes should be dirty.. It dawned on her that maybe Lwyn had even left THAT behind, and packed her some of her actual clothes. If she was running away and leaving everything behind, that stuff will be important for bringing her home.
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Everyone met up again really quickly afterwards, all packed and ready to go. Zyuixqs had then shown up as well. "Zyuixqs, sorry, you will have to stay behind for this one. Please tell Rhyde that Lwyn has ran away, and we're off to bring her back. I have a really bad feeling about this, something has gone very wrong. Rhyde will know what to do, but we have to go, now. Take care!" Thanrie waved as she closed her statement to Zyuixqs, and headed out the door.
Mhyl's headset was back in action, and she could still see Lwyn off in the distance. Perfect, but they had to make sure she didn't go out of range. They kept in pursuit, though Lwyn kept a distance ahead. "Should I just go dash up and find her?" "You could dash ahead, but Lwyn will know you are coming. You won't have a way to find her if she turns from her course, so that will just make it harder." Thanrie's idea for going faster seemed good at first, but they really needed Mhyl's sensory talent in order to find her at this distance.
Eventually however, Mhyl started to tire. "Fine, I'll carry you on my back if we have to. I did it before. You can rest that way while we still keep going." Qheria's stubbornness was starting to kick in as well, she was determined to catch up to Lwyn. Thanrie recalled the time back then where Mhyl had been carried by Qheria, wounded. Qheria had even managed to carry her for ages across this entire expanse, it was impressive.
Thanrie paused for a moment, a sudden revelation hit her. Earlier, she had estimated that Lwyn had used her gift to tend to Mhyl at the Factory, when Mhyl had gotten scalded. That was because Lwyn had fallen beside Mhyl. But herself, when she had used magic, it wasn't even a quick thing, she had stayed there for hours in a daze as they had worked. Lwyn had actually fainted for a matter of mere minutes. However, then Qheria had started to carry her along, for a matter of hours. Celese didn't actually use fine measurements of time like hours or minutes, but it was still around that level of difference.
She had a feeling that this distinction mattered right now, but couldn't yet figure out why. "So instead of Lwyn, then the people who had used their gift would be.. Mhyl, Qheria, and I." Thanrie had started to do the calculations out loud in English. "Thanrie, what are you mumbling about?" "Oh sorry, I'm going over how it was when Qheria had to carry you before. I'm wondering if it was really Qheria that had kept you safe, instead of Lwyn." Mhyl was surprised in this moment, she had stopped considering the insight Thanrie had provided back then. "Wait, there was a gift incident back then?" Qheria had actually been kept out of the loop of the whole thing.
Mhyl and Thanrie looked at each other in embarrassment. They had forgotten to bring this up before. Thanrie covered the details of her previous belief that Lwyn had helped stabilize Mhyl, but had recently decided that it might have instead been Qheria who had done so, as they had travelled. Qheria admitted to having found herself exceptionally tired from that trip, but she just expected it was due to her own depression. Thanrie recalled that, on the other hand Lwyn had mostly suffered from her injury fainting back then, not the usual tired they had each gone through with the gift.
All four of them had even gone through some serious injuries too.. although now that she thought of it, Lwyn's injuries were pretty bad, her fight with Hammer-face had left her worse off than any of them, but her injuries weren't exactly life threatening. She had even been waking up frequently due to the pain, and not the deep sleep they had each gone through from injuries. Thanrie could still remember how deeply she had slept.
"I still can't believe I had such a strange dream back then too." Thanrie was again speaking thoughts out loud, her head filling to capacity with present-day concerns that she was determined to find a resolution for. Her head was spinning trying to find ways to help Lwyn, a change from her typical defeated mentality. Mhyl was right, looking forwards was the best way to keep going, even after things went wrong.
Mhyl and Qheria blinked at Thanrie's remark, left in their own wonder. "What dream are you talking about?" "Oh, I remember while I was recovering way back then, I had the strangest of dreams." Mhyl blinked yet again at Thanrie's reply, herself starting to wonder. "You know, when it was my turn to almost die, I also had the strangest of dreams." "Is it normal to just have strange dreams when you almost die? I mean, I've heard about life flashing before your eyes, but.. even my own dream then.. that's not at all how it felt." Mhyl was further surprised to hear Qheria admit to a third case, right after her own.
The three of them started to share the tale of their dream as they travelled, since it had came up. Mhyl was very curious, because dreams would indicate a mental state for all of them, a matter they had a huge concern over. She also thought back to their mental states around each of their injuries. Each of them had dramatic improvements to their mental state after nearly dying, which itself might not make sense. Dreams however are an act of symbolism within the mind, to come to terms with ideas and facts.
In all three cases, things were left with overwhelming despair at first, with even some common themes. All three of them were heavily injured even in their own dreams, but then left to face and confront hopelessness. All three of them kept going, sticking to the trail set before them. Then a confrontation and a closure of respite. The ending in each case almost felt like.. an acceptance. Mhyl pondered these observations and shared them with the others.
However, Mhyl realized that Lwyn had been exempt from all of this. If she wasn't the one to use a gift, she was the only one who never had a gift, the only one who never faced a resolution within her own mind, and the only one who.. actually, that might be the whole of it. She also recalled the musical they had ended with, and her own inner conflict expressed in song. Having been left at a different pace in everything else, she was left aside in their music as well, and couldn't keep up.
That might not have had much impact, but it's not like she had been left without doubts for.. a long time now. Mhyl recalled that she had never found the opportunity to help Lwyn through Qheria's entire recovery, and that maybe she had even been troubled since Mhyl's own. Actually, that plastic smile, just how long had it been going on for. Mhyl started to feel alarmed at just how much she might have been ignoring how her friend had been feeling this entire time. One of her close friends actually, possibly her absolute best friend considering she actually felt more akin to Lwyn than either Qheria or Thanrie. This thought actually started to distress her.
"Qheria, you're going to need a break soon. You didn't trade off with anyone last time, leaving Zyuixqs and I to do the only trading, but you're certainly not getting away with that now. Pass Mhyl over." Thanrie had started noticing that Qheria was starting to struggle with her own endurance. Mhyl was certain she was fairly light, though in all accounts even a light person is still a burden after all of this travelling. It's not like she was as light as a book or anything.
Soon though, even Thanrie started to tire. Mhyl had noticed that Lwyn had stopped for a break, and had hoped that they could catch up to her while she relaxed, but it seems they would not be so lucky. At least, while Lwyn also relaxed, she could not escape the range of the headset either. They would have to just hope that an opportunity presented itself.
Lwyn eventually finished with her break, and got up again. She knew she couldn't manage the trip in a single try, but that didn't matter. She would get there when she got there. She still had no idea where she would go after, maybe the factory would give her answers to that as well as the tools she needed. She put her stuff away, having eaten her portion of packed dinner, and continued on her way.
She arrived at the factory some time in the night. She walked in through the still-open gates, as they were too broken to close at this point. She looked around, recalling the scenery. As she was getting her bearings, she felt a blow to her head from behind, and lost consciousness.
"Khaexyn was right. Someone did show up here eventually, and only one of em even. Easy haul. Get her tied secure and stash her in the Destroyer. He said to bring any captives from this site straight to him, remember? If we want to get paid, we have to make sure she doesn't escape." The bandit was in glee, excited for the quality of pay she would receive for this delivery. Her two accomplices were also in agreement, and carried Lwyn away.
Mhyl followed the whole thing from her headset in dread, having reported things in real time as they ran. Lwyn was in serious trouble, and was about to be taken captive. They rushed in to see a Destroyer drive away. Mhyl also noticed another Destroyer nearby was loading up with three other people, and brought Qheria and Thanrie with her. They intercepted this Destroyer and got in.
"Qheria, you've got the wheel again. I know you've got this, this time." Thanrie lent her support as Mhyl kept focus on the other Destroyer. "Qheria, they went that way. Follow them." "Okay, but if Lwyn's inside, we can't actually shoot them." Mhyl pondered the dilemma Qheria had presented to her, and how would they fix this. "We don't have to shoot them, keep us looking like bandits, we'll be allowed to follow them the entire trip. When they start to unload Lwyn, we can figure something out." Thanrie wasn't even sure of her own idea. This would put them in a situation of danger, in the middle of an enemy bandit camp. They would at least have the element of surprise, but nothing more. However, they had seen how fragile these Destroyers can be if anything goes wrong. When a Destroyer explodes, the occupants tend to die right away.
Even as they drove towards the lake, it took them a while to realize that they weren't actually heading towards a bandit camp. Eventually, the full blown magnitude of the Fortress itself rolled into their view.