William Blackthorn stumbled his way drunk as you please through the foggy London streets late one evening. He was on his way back to his family's urban residence in one of the wealthier neighborhoods in the city, and had ceased paying the slightest attention to his surroundings in his stupor. He was a handsome young man, a few inches short of six feet and possessed a set of cheekbones and curly mop of raven black hair that was the envy or desire of everyone he met. He sported a stylish green velvet party coat trimmed in gold silk, with soft brown leather shoes. He had in his usual fashion arrived the earliest to the celebration and was among the last to leave, having drunk his fill and out partied near everyone there. He turned down a side alley hoping to get home quicker but soon realized he was lost. Just as his inebriated brain was about to start calling out for help, a gentleman in a fine black suit and a stylish top hat stepped out of the dark and made his way towards William. He was incredibly handsome, sparkling eyes like gems on an ivory white face that featured a slender noble nose with ruby red lips. Not much else of him was visible beneath his suit and cape, leather gloves covering his hands.
“Good evening” The stranger said in an acutely aristocratic accent, his voice was smooth as glass.
The gentleman bowed as he tipped his hat and smiled. His were sparklingly white, and peculiarly sharp looking.
“I am sorry if I have startled you, I simply noticed you appeared quite lost, and thought perhaps I might offer some assistance. It is dangerous for one of your stature and...build, to be wandering about this time of night. One never knows what fiends may be lurking in the dark to prey upon such a delicious looking young man”
“Why thhhank you kind shir” William slurred. I could shurtainly use a f-few directions, I ap..appear to be losssst as all shit. No n*hiccup* need for flattery I’m afraid, I’m qu*hiccup*quite too drunk for any t-tomfoolery tonight, ashhhhamed as I am...t-to say”
The stranger paid no mind to the drunken swearing or rejection of his perceived sexual advances but instead politely outstretched his hand.
“Well worry not good sire, for I shall see to it that you are resting comfortably by night's end.” No hint of malice or threat, the perfect gentleman.
“But first, shall we make a stop by my own humble home? I assure you I am quite close by. You and I can share in a...late night drink, perhaps?”
*BOOM BOOM* *BOOM BOOM*
The mysterious gentleman’s chest exploded in a spray of thick black blood and shards of bone, covering Williams face and painting the walls of the alley in a mural of viscera and gore.
“Damned if ah don’t hate those bloody drinkin metaphors, they all use the same ones and thenk they're the most original, clever, witty bastards alive. If yer gonna kill a man just kill em and get it over with!”
William turned his blood spattered head, quite sober by this point and saw a woman standing in the alley to his right. She was tall for a woman, and obviously very attractive, bossoms the size of his head mounted on a large chest that tapered down to a narrow waist, once again flaring out into delightfully wide hips that provided a resting place for an ass that would put a race horse to shame, but she looked more like some back alley brawler than a lady, dressed in brown trousers and a simple white shirt, soot smearing her face and clothes. Her hair looked like it was probably blonde but with the grime and it being tied back in a long tail, he couldn’t be sure. The most intimidating thing though was the fact she was holding a pair of freshly empty sawn off shotguns in her hands, the barrels still smoking.
“Wh-what in the bloody hell was that? You just shot a man! Where did you come from? Why did you do that? Why am I not screaming? How am I going to get these stains out!!!? Oh christ please don’t shoot me!” William frantically rattled off, his nerves beginning to fray as he shielded his face with his arms.
“Calm yer skirts there lassy, ah just saved ye from bein that fopps dinner. Been following the bugger fer several blocks now watin for a chance, and yer drunken arse gave it to me. He wasn’t a friend, it was a vampire, a blood suckin devil. Check his teeth if ye don’t believe me, but watch out, there's an off chance ah didnae quite destroy the heart.” She did her best to calm him as she slipped her guns back into the leather holsters tucked behind her back on a large leather belt.
The mystery woman said all of this like it was the most natural thing in the world. William composed himself enough to bend over and examine the corpse, finding nothing out of the ordinary.
“Check the teeth ya idjit, haven’t ye ever heard a damned scary story?” She hollered with irritation marking her voice.
At that he grabbed the corpse's hand and used the gloved finger to raise the lips, seeing that his early suspicion was true and that his incisors were indeed of inhuman length.
“By god you’re right. So the bastard was going to dine on me like some kind of hors d'oeuvre? Well piss on you then you sanguinary shitsack!” He spat at the ruined corpse
‘Where the hell did you come from my lady if I may ask? There was nobody here a moment ago and you don’t appear to have snuck behind anyone”
“Ah been makin mah way across the rooftops to stay out of it’s sight and smell. Dropped down while yer drunk arse was distracting im and hit’em with V-shot. Blessed silver packed in garlic paste and salt. Weakens them something fierce if you just clip em, puts em down permanent if you shred the heart. You alright? Didn’t clip ye did I? Ah of course not, you'd be squealin like a stuck pig if ah had. Where do ye live? Ah can walk ye home in case more of em come lookin, not too often they live alone.”
Five minutes ago the notion of being escorted home by a woman would have been laughable at best if he wasn’t in the process of trying to bed her, but judging by what had just happened and by the particularly hardness this woman had about her, he was not about to protest.
“Why thank you, I do believe that would set my mind at ease. I should be just a few streets away if I can get my bearings right. Thank god you were around eh? Otherwise I might be a husk on some chaps Persian rug.”
“Aye, ahm sure that would put a damper on yer dandy arse’s social life.” Contempt layering her voice.
“You’re quite right despite the sarcastic tone, the social papers would weep over my disappearance I should say. Where else would they get the material for their weekly scandal column?”
The pair walked together in relative silence for several blocks, William eventually found his way home to the large brick townhouse and fumbled for the keys to the heavy iron lock.
“Thank you for the escort Madame, I truly appreciate that evisceration you performed. Might I ask, do you do this often? Seems like dangerous work for a grown soldier, much less a young woman.”
“Don’t be pullin that “fairer sex” shite with me, ah been doin this since before you could order a servant around without droolin on yerself, probably years longer than that judgin bah the looks of ye”
“My my that tongue is almost as sharp as the outfit you ruined. For your information I haven’t drooled since I was thirteen thank you very much. Now might I inquire as to your sleeping arrangements?”
“Are ye seriously gettin fresh with me ya slick little poof? I oughta stuff yer wedding tackle in mah damned guns and blast it right back in yer face!” Her voice rising with indignation.
“My dear please don’t flatter yourself, while you certainly have some large...guns, and I would be lying if I said I hadn’t made notice of those fine flanks and bountiful breasts, I tend to avoid women with a propensity for violence in my romantic life, as I tend to spoil the relationship rather quickly. I am simply offering you a room for the night. You smell like you live in a gutter and I can’t imagine you have much in the way of money. It is the least I could do, you are even free to make use of the pantry to your heart's content. I myself couldn’t eat a bite after all that transpired tonight.”
Gavina thought over the offer, doing her best not to bust his jaw open for the commentary on her body, but her stomach rumbled loudly and interrupted her train of thought. Her father had been gone three weeks longer than he had promised and she had run out of food and money a week ago. Sensing no threat and knowing that pride was worthless when trying to stay alive she made her choice.
“Aye, thank ye fer the offer. Ah reckin ah could use a decent place to rest, and ahm starving ta boot.” She responded without looking in her benefactor's eyes.
“Very good then, in we go” and with that William opened the door and lead her inside the comfortably furnished townhouse.
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The walls were papered in silk, dark forest green with gilded crown molding all about. The walls hosted a number of paintings of various members of the family dating back centuries. Soldiers, government ministers and noblemen all. The wood was strong oak and the furnishings covered in rich but comfortably worn leather. He led her to the kitchen, and opened up the pantry, bringing out a loaf of brown bread, a wedge of sharp yellow cheese and some cured sausages for his guest on a large wooden platter with a knife.
Gavina began stuffing her face with zeal, unconcerned with how it looked to her host. She had been living off of salted beef strips and rock hard biscuits as of late, and had run out of beef a week ago. The cheese was sharp and soft, the sausage amazingly seasoned, obviously made by someone who knew what they were doing. Even the bread which was clearly going stale tasted better than what she was used to eating on the road. William watched in fascination, not used to seeing a woman actually enjoy their food, much less with such enthusiasm. It was the highest fashion for society women to starve themselves half to death these days, dangerous and sad.
“After your meal I Imagine you will be wanting a bath? No offense dear but you are absolutely filthy. We have a marvelous tub upstairs, with hot running water.”
“Why in the hell would ah do somethin like that? You got a problem with the way ah smell you crinkle nose little twat?” She lashed back at him, crumbs of cheese and bread attached to her face.
“Well dear seeing as how I have a nose and I’m alive and breathing yes I do, but it is none of my concern if you are happy smelling and looking like you just crawled out of an open sewer. By all means do as you please.” William retorted with equal parts sarcasm and disinterest.
“Fer yer information sally, smellin like daiseys all the time is a damned liability when yer trackin thengs that can smell ye from a mile off. But nuthin hardly gives a second smell ta stenk in a forest or a city. So excuse me If ah don’t jump at the chance ta get all soaped up and clean fer yer highness.”
“Couldn’t care less honestly, you are far from the dirtiest company I have kept in the past. The sailors down by the port reek of sweat and fish, but they certainly know how to have a good time. I simply thought that since you at least resemble a woman that you might delight in a bit of relaxing hygiene. No, I am far more interested in what it is you do for a living, how you go about your life as a traveling rogue, saving damsels in distress like myself as it were.”
Gavina had no idea how to feel about that woman remark, but it seemed nothing she said could phase him. She debated telling him to mind his own business but seeing as he was helping her out and he had already seen one monster, it couldn’t hurt anything to let him in on the whole story.
“Fine, if you must know, me and me da are devil slayers, monster hunters, exterminators, whatever ye want teh call et. Since ah was a babe and me ma and brother were killed by what da suspects was a werewolf, we’ve traveled together while he trained me and went out huntin. When ah was finally ready, we’d team up and work jobs together. Trolls, demons, fairies and vampires as you saw back there are all very real, them and worse. They prey upon humans and feed on their misery...aaand in most cases their flesh. We do what we can teh keep people safe, even drunk helpless little dandies like yerself.”
“Now that does sound like an adventure. Travel, danger, guns, such an improvement over constantly trying to find new drinking companions who don’t get dull after a few weeks. I dare say you are quite fortunate.” William exclaimed with a hint of excitement in his eyes
“Adventure?!” Gavina shot back indignantly “Mah family is butchered and ah spend mah childhood turnin into a killer, being chased and almost eaten by all sorts a beasts and horrors, and ye call that an adventure?!
“......Well yes. What you have just described is the very definition of adventure. I am sure you look about and see luxury and laziness on my part but honestly it means nothing to me at all. I find nothing but dreariness and boredom in life, that’s why I go out of my way to liven it up, much to the chagrin of some. Say, where exactly is your father, I should absolutely love to meet him, he can’t possibly be as coarse and negative as you.”
Gavina gazed down at the table with a look of worry.
“Ah don’t know for certain. He was supposed ta be here weeks ago. He left fer York a month back to track down a lead on the possible involvement of a monster that butchered a caravan of gypsies. He left me here to deal with yet another vampire infestation. The buggers are attracted ta cities like flies ta a bloated corpse. He promised ta send word to me or return but he is way past the deadline and ahm startin to get worried. It isn’t like him ta not even write. Ah would go find him mahself but ah ran out of money weeks ago, so the train is out of the question, but horseback would take so long that he might be back here by the time ah got there. Ah don’t know what the hell ta do but ah can’t stand the thought of sittin idly by while me da might be in danger.” She cursed herself and her indecision. Not to mention this display of emotion in front of a total stranger.
“Well I say that’s no problem at all.” William replied.
“I can have the two of us on a train to York first thing in the morning with a short stopover near the family manor for a short chat with my father before heading off to save yours.” He replied cheerily to the shock of his guest.
“Are ye daft? Ah’ll not be havin some useless spoiled brat out for a cheap thrill taggin along distractin me and gettin me killed.” She spat at him venomously
“I can assure you that I am far from useless." He stood straight like a ring master about to pitch some exotic circus act to an enraptured audience.
"One. You are clearly in need of funds and as you can see I am far from lacking in that department. With me around you need never go hungry again." He reached into his breast pocket and flung several blood stained notes and coins on the table, which Gavina swiftly dodged, holding back from retaliating.
"Two. Transport. I can promise that trains and steamers are far more effective means of travel than horse or foot. I can get you from the Channel islands to the Shetlands in no time flat, in comfort and style. Much better than trudging through the mud or riding some busted old nag for a week to get a few counties over." As he gave his impassioned sales pitch he flung his arms from the metaphorical south the the north.
"And Finally number three. There is the small matter of you being both A) a peasant and B) a woman. I am sure that sniffing around back rooms and pubs has served you well so far but I can tell you first hand there are benefits to having access to certain social circles, heretofore inaccessible to the common rabble, particularly females. Imagine hearing rumors of a satanic cult sacrificing virgins at dinner parties and gentlemen's clubs, and being able to have someone walk right into one of these meetings and see for themselves without the trouble of skulking and climbing through windows. Or needing access to some rare books on the occult or mythology trapped in some earls private library and being welcomed right in. And my greatest value by far, is that there is quite literally nothing I won’t do. I have yet to meet a single challenge or danger I haven’t been deeply enticed by. You can use and abuse me in any way you see fit. I know it doesn’t quite match up to your mysterious loner style but it is a valuable asset nonetheless. At least consider it will you? Just one little tag along so I can show the old man I’m not quite so soft as he supposes.”
Gavina mulled over everything he said and despite making one or two somewhat valid points as far as financing went, the thought of taking on this dead weight when for so long she had relied on just the company of herself and her father left a sour taste in her mouth.
“Shah, ah’ll thenk on it, and while ahm at it ah’ll just plan the two of us a little tea party! With honey cakes and lemon” With that she got up from the counter and began heading up stairs.
“Last room on the right, toilet room is two doors before it” Shouted William, confident she would come around and see reason.
“And I prefer custard to cake.”
He cleaned up the mess from dinner and headed up to his own chambers, across the hall from the guest room. As he passed by the wash room he heard the sounds of water splashing and a little smirk crept across his lips.
Gavina quietly slipped into the washroom as soon as she reached the top of the stairs and locked the door. She hated the idea of giving her host the satisfaction of knowing she was taking his advice and washing off the filth that she had accumulated these past weeks sleeping in the streets. She saw the large copper tub and a valve connected to the pipe where she presumed the water came from. She turned a knob and water began flowing from the tap, filling the tub with steaming water. She stripped down out of her filthy clothes, hanging them and her holster belt on a large brass bar. Once the water was at chest level, she turned off the knob and climbed in, the near scalding water waking up all of her nerves. When she was submerged past her shoulders all of her muscles started to unwind, the tension just melting off. A bar of black soap was on a small dish attached to the tub. She grabbed it and gave it a sniff. It smelled of pine tar and walnuts and was coarse as sand. She started to scrub her arms and shoulders, stripping away the grime and soot that one couldn’t help but accumulate on the London streets. She watched as her brownish gray skin slowly turned a bright shade of pink. The rough texture was not altogether unpleasant, particularly as it brushed over the nipples of her sizable and shapely breasts. This sent a wave of goosebumps over her body, causing a small moan to escape her lips. She caught herself and perked her ears, listening for her young host or any of the servants that were bound to live in a home like this. Hearing none, she decided to take advantage of this rare moment of peace and solitude and continued to run circles around her freshly cleaned and sensitive bosom as her other hand ventured down her flat muscular stomach, running her fingers through her patch of curly blonde hair and between her thick toned thighs, gently stroking her womanhood. Gasps and moans escaped with increasing volume as the sensations of the heat and the soap and the rhythm of her nimble fingers mixed together in a swirl of ecstasy. As she built herself up slowly to a body rocking, back arching climax, a silent scream escaping her mouth, she collapsed back into the tub gasping and relaxed from head to toe.
She was grateful for the opportunity. She rarely thought of herself as a woman, much less a sexual being. Desire was just another distraction that she forced herself to overcome, never having time for it anyway with as busy as she and her father stayed. Her father was another obstacle to any kind of physical fulfillment. When he wasn’t by her side, his lessons about vigilance and remaining untrusting of strangers led her to never give the time of day to most men. Finally, a life on the road, sleeping in crowded inns, dirty barns and alleys was not exactly conducive to any kind of quality personal time.
She lay there a few moments more, before climbing out of the tub and draining the filthy water, but not before washing out her clothes and hanging them to dry on the towel racks. She wrapped herself in one of the thick luxurious towels and tiptoed down to her room. The bed was larger than she had ever imagined anyone needing, with thick ruffled blankets and goose down pillows. She couldn’t believe people actually lived like this every day.
She finished drying off and hopped into bed, exhausted from the trials of the day and drifted off to restless sleep, dreaming of her father calling out for her aid, yet always remaining just outside her reach.