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#7 - Everything's Fine

#7 - Everything's Fine

... good morning.

Cherri here.

Second day of high school... or, well, should be- but- suspended. So I get to stay at home today, yay!

Earlier this morning, I walked with Gumi to the bus stop, and stayed with her for a bit. Kept her company the whole time, just waiting the whole time. Made sure she wasn't alone outside as we waited. As she spent the whole time on her phone, texting Soleil and Elena this fine morning.

"So... a-are you sure you don't want to join the group chat...?"

"Nah. We're doing this right. I'm not their friend yet until we properly hang out in class tomorrow, okay?"

"Okay... well, uhm... alright. L-Looking forward to it!"

Not much else was said between us, to be honest. Just a fine, quiet morning and all, the sun just- waking up, too. I didn't bother to pay attention to whatever Gumi was texting the other girls, because- well, only Gumi's in that chat. I'd be violating her privacy if I peeked at what was going on, and I'd be intruding if she- told me about what they were talking about, so I ignore her phone the entire time.

As I told Gumi, we needed to do this right. I get to see the conversation when I'm finally friends with them and junk, and- that'll happen tomorrow. Should happen tomorrow, at least.

Yeah.

So, eventually, the bus came, and I waved Gumi off. Watched as she boarded the bus alone, heading to wherever she'll end up sitting. I tried to follow her with my eyes as she walked along, curious about where she's going to sit, if she's gonna hang out with Lizard Nerd or someone else on there.

Though, I didn't get to see much. The bus remained completely in place, and I completely lost sight of Gumi. Rather than see my sister- I just see some normal anthropomorphic animals, like- dogs and cats... curiously, a few birds and- yeah.

I could see almost everyone that I saw yesterday- just, well, couldn't see everybody because I only had view of one half of the bus.

Most interestingly, I did see the Horse guy with the interesting Brazilian shirt. He's sitting where he was yesterday. Couldn't see his shirt, he looks like he's wearing a different one now, so like... yeah. Guess I have something to check out tomorrow.

... but, uhm, as I saw all the classmates on the bus I could possibly see, I also- well, I also noticed some of the other classmates staring at me through their windows.

Their eyes just- looking towards me, acknowledging I didn't get on for the briefest of moments before looking elsewhere. It just- I guess it felt... judgmental, hostile, uncomfortable. Especially since I recognized some of them from Math and Biology yesterday.

Some of... ugh... Makeup Weasel's friends, probably. If I was on the bus today, some crap would probably be started, so I dodged a potential bullet. Metaphorically, of course.

But I don't really care much 'bout them. I just wanna see Gumi, see the lizard nerd and all, wherever they could be, but- I don't really... know where that is.

And to rub salt on the wound of being unable to see my sister, the bus driver gets my attention and clears his throat.

I didn't really talk about the bus driver with you, Mr. California, but- the bus pretty much looked like a menacing grim reaper, like- a spooky phantom and all. He was wearing this thick, black cloak that manifested underneath his normal bus driver uniform, with his head completely covered by the cloak's cowl. I couldn't see his face past the shadow of the hood, but- he was looking at me with his bright red eyes peering through the darkness.

Then, when he called for my attention, his voice echoed out with a pretty intense and ominous aura behind his words, going: "... well? You coming on too, kid?"

Well, I mean like... not intense and ominous to me, for the record. I wasn't scared of him. He actually looked really cool. I'm just describing him as ominous so YOU can get scared of him, because y'know, grim reapers are... scary, and stuff.

But anyway, told him no. Told him I wasn't coming onto the bus. "Nah, I'm fine. Suspended for the day. Go on without me," I told him.

I couldn't come on even if I wanted to, since I'd probably might get in trouble if they see me go to school anyway. As much as breaking that rule would be fun... it's, like, my second day, so I don't really want to, I guess? Plus, it's a hassle to walk all the way back home, so it's like... yeah.

"... ah. Well. See you tomorrow, then." He looked back forward, closed the door and drove off, headed to the other houses on the way to school and stuff. So, Gumi was off, and she's going to have a great day today.

Is having a great day, actually, as I speak to you, Mr. California. Gumi's doing great right now, so yeah! Haha!

Hah...

...

Well, with... with that, uhm, I walked back to my house after. Walked along the sidewalk and came back home.

Hippo Dad stuck around for a bit, getting ready for work and stuff. Dressed up in his suit and packing up all his work belongings, the same stuff I- saw yesterday. Made sure he was looking fine and alright, did a bit of grooming to make his hippo face less wrinkly looking- even as he's as bald as ever, y'know? Just- typical hippo things.

So, I got to see him for quite some time, spent a bit with him before he left for work at 8.

"Have a good day at work, pops," I told him, as he was on the way out the door.

Hippo Dad stopped to look back at me, just- smiling and waving lightly to me. Just- ready to go to work and do all that work stuff, I guess. That accounting stuff, that- boring moneymaking math junk.

Though- before he left for real, he stopped and turned around before asking out of nowhere: "You sure you'll be fine alone, Cherri?"

And I reassured him. "Yeah. I know how to use the microwave. Heat up the salisbury steak lunch, right?"

"Mhmm," Hippo Dad told me. "Well- so... do you, uhm, want anything specific for dinner?"

"Eh. Nothing comes to mind," I answered. "That's a later tonight problem, and- yeah. I'm fine with whatever."

"Alright. Well- see you tonight, hon..."

"Mhmm. See ya, pops."

With that, Hippo Dad got into his car and drove off to work, and I had the whole house to myself now. All its box-free glory, as the entirety of yesterday was spent unpacking everything. Now all the furniture is set up, Hippo Dad's stuff is out in the open and unorganized, Gumi and I got our stuff all arranged, and just... yeah.

So the first thing I did with my big day, my happy lil' break. I walked up to the bedroom, and just decided to kick back and relax in my bed. Lying contently for a bit, just chilling out, relaxing, sort of just spending the morning in leisure. I took a moment to actually change into pajamas for additional comfort, then I just lied back back and just- ah, unwinding in my cozy mattress, ready to just snuggle into my sheets and snooze off.

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Been unwinding for a while now, actually. Arms behind the back of my head, right leg crossed over left, having the blanket over my chest while my legs were exposed to the room air. Relaxing and stuff.

Yeah...

... yeah...

...

Yeah.

"..."

It's like... half past ten. Three hours have passed.

Yesterday, we were in three classes- Gumi in four, and uhm... there are four new classes today. Gumi and I share the exact same schedule, so like... I probably had a good guess on how her day'll be going.

She already got through Health Class for first period, all that... health... stuff, and now she's in the school gym. Physical Education or whatever. That entire class that does all the sports and exercise stuff. Class will end in 30 minutes, before Gumi goes to eat lunch at 11 today- then, Language Arts (basically our 9th grade English class), and then Government... learning all that- political stuff, all those laws and junk.

Gumi texted me, like, a couple of times during first period. Told me that the teacher's going over the class, did a brief exercise about goal setting, and uhm... yeah. Bunch of "health" stuff... though, it's like- I think it's more like an introductory life course or whatever. Introduction to life, to living life, to- living a healthy life and stuff. So- y'know, yeah.

Also, apparently, she and Lizard Nerd share this class together, so they sat with each other. The health class room has, like, circle desks with four chairs per table, and- they're saving a seat for me. Two seats, even, haha, no one's- no one's sitting with them, when they texted me.

... apart from that, I- got no idea yet, what she's doing now in PE. Could be something really fun. Maybe another ice breaker, like in Drama, but happening in a gym. Maybe some brief exercise, maybe they're playing some fun lil' introductory sport, whatever floats the school's boat I guess. Whatever the case, Gumi's gone phone silent.

Probably put her phone in the, uh, the gym lockers. Those gym lockers that store things. Phone put away so that it doesn't fall out of her pocket or get stolen or stuff. All that casual gym stuff.

So, I guess I just gotta wait until she texts me around- 11, maybe some minutes before- just- depending on whatever it is they're doing, I guess.

Yeah.

...

Sigh.

You know, Mr. California... I used to dislike being in school. It was boring, a ton of work, a ton of- nonsense.

I think I get why suspensions are suspensions. You feel like you're doing nothing. You're unable to do anything. A school tells you to just go home and do anything for a while, as long as it's not there. A feeling of... isolation. A feeling of being unwanted. Too much trouble as you are, right now.

Same logic goes for sick days. You feel a relief when you're sick, until you realize you can't do anything when you're sick either. You're absolutely bedridden while everyone around you just has a better day than you.

Any other time, any other day, I'd thrive off of this free time. I'm not sick, I'm- I'm just suspended. That's it. I'm out of school, and I'd just- be my active lil' Cherri self and find something to do. Leave the house, probably explore a bit and all, tons of stuff like that.

In fact- like, back in middle school, I sometimes skipped class willingly. All the stuff back then didn't really seem all that fun, and- and I guess, I dunno, I was trying to figure out how to adapt my social life to the differences between elementary and middle school. Didn't turn out so well, I didn't- have much friends then, either, so- so I decided I was too bored to do any of it.

Skipped a bunch, didn't tell my dad and the school didn't- call my dad, either, until it was far too late. I even got held back for one year, had to repeat 6th grade- which is why Gumi and I are both freshmen this year.

See, contrary to our similar appearances, the Kusuri sisters are not actually twin sisters. Sure, we share the same birth date, but not the same year. I was born exactly one year before Gumi- or, rather, Gumi was born exactly one year ahead of me.

I mentioned this briefly, like- yesterday morning, when I started this entire mental diary. When Gumi and I were 7 and 8, respectively, EFD season hit, and- blah blah blah, yeah, I haven't really bothered to explain that difference in our age. Now I am, now you know that small and miniscule detail that doesn't make much of a difference in any way that isn't school related.

Because I was one year older than Gumi, she and I were split apart as I was in 6th and she was in 5th. We attended the same elementary school after the first time we moved, and I think school was fine then, but... uhm... I just kinda gave up on my studies, when 6th grade rolled around.

So when I got held back once for 6th grade, it was the best thing that could have happened to me. Gumi was the only reason I could get through school, get through- 6th and 7th and 8th grade, all three years of that. I pretty much got my life lined up with Gumi's after this little setback. The school decided to make sure she and I were in the same classes so they could be rid of me, and, well... we've been inseparable since then.

Hippo Dad pretty much chewed off my ear, metaphorically, when he found out about what I did- but it was whatever. I roll with the punches, as that saying goes, and I managed to keep up with Gumi this whole time. Got through it all together, studying the same things, sharing the same- "social circles" or something, and- and, yeah.

So, going into this, I was- excited for both of us to just be 15 year old girls, coming into 9th grade for the first time. I guess I just really kinda want to be there with Gumi, to be with her and live the same way we always have- as a pair. A pair of humans amidst this world of creatures and monsters and such.

I... I guess I was just hoping things would work out this year, that things would turn out better, that we'd have one heck of a high school life. Enjoying it all to the fullest, having fun and going through this world like we always have. I even started this mental diary to- to log all of it, so I can remember the four best years of our lives, you know?

But... Makeup Weasel and... the suspension and... and...

... I...

I guess I just- I don't know, okay?

Hippo Dad- no, no. Actual Dad... the actual- actual step-dad told stories about his high school life sometimes. How those were his glory years. I- I think he bragged to my mom about how smart he was, and told her stories about the cool things he did. I don't remember any of what he used to say, but- he said it, he- he said it.

These should be the best years of my life, but I'm- I feel awful. This is the second worst I've ever felt in my entire life, coming only before the literal end of the world that replaced almost everyone I ever knew with almost unrecognizable creatures.

And now I just- this- this entire morning just feels like Hippo Dad and Gumi are just really concerned about me, that I'm just actively ruining their day over it. That these first couple of days are also possibly the worst days of their lives, too, having to deal with a suspended family member.

But... but if it turns out their day isn't being ruined because of me? If it turns out they're just- fine, they're really fine, then that means I'm the only one having a bad day. I'm the only who feels this awful, this terrible, this- this miserable.

...

I can't- I can't bring myself to text her. I grabbed my phone just now, and I wanted to text her, to check up on her, but- but I couldn't. I can't. I just can't.

It doesn't feel right to- reach out to her first.

Like I mentioned earlier, Gumi- Gumi's having a good day today. She is, she will be, all of that. If things were going badly, Gumi would have texted. No, no, it's, the fact she's not texting just means I'm right, that she is - in fact - having a really great day, after all.

She's focused on all that school stuff and hanging out with her potential new friends and stuff. All that stuff going on at this very moment. I know at least Lizard Nerd was with her in first period, maybe he's with her for the rest of the classes. Maybe Soleil and Elena showed up in one of the other classes. Maybe they formed a whole friend group, three girls and one guy just- hanging out and doing all that high school student stuff, and... and...

...

Uhm... uh... how do I put this...

Mr. California, I'm just gonna- ask this. I- I don't really- I don't want you to judge me, but- if you really want to, you can, I'm just- I'm gonna ask. Here goes.

Is... is...

... is it bad that I want Gumi to text me, to text me while she's desperately in trouble or something, to tell me she's having a really rough time at school without me? That since I'm not there to hang out with her and protect her, she just- had to deal with all of it, but she really wants me there badly and can't take another minute without me or else she'll cry?

That... that sounds bad, now that I'm thinking it. It really does. I'm basically telling you that I actually want Gumi to have a terrible day today, to feel as terrible as I do.

Of course that's not true, I- I wouldn't want Gumi to have a terrible day, I- I'm sure of that! I- I'm not THAT awful to want her to suffer. In fact, all of this is happening because I want Gumi to be happy. I took the fall for all that Makeup Weasel stuff because I don't want Gumi's life to be ruined. Of course I want Gumi to have a good day, to have a good high school life more than anything! She's smart and she'll do all that stuff genius people do, and- yeah!

But- but... w... we're- we're the inseparable Kusuri sisters. Gumi's my little sister, and I've always been there for her. I-In fact, I'll always be there for her. Whenever she's sad, whenever she's feeling bad, whenever she just needs- someone there in her life... that's- that's what I should be there for. We're the only two actual living humans left in this world.

So- I guess.. I just... maybe...

...

...

...

I- I don't feel well.

I'm going to bed early. I- I just, I think I just need to sleep this off.

Good night, Mr. California. Talk to you- some... some other time.