Novels2Search

=== Chapter 2 "The Sphere"

=== Chapter 2 "The Sphere"

[Hey hi and hello, today we are having an interview! It is just a named guy from Unwritten, and you might know him by Xyl.

He is a community manager and an online streamer so you got to know him, right guys? I believe he is the leader of TSO too,

quite cool right? But what are his secrets and why are his streams popular? Want to find out? Okay, here we go everyone!]

This was like an online interview inside of the game, I just happen to pass by during the broadcast so I was interested. The host was some kind of popular online personality, a virtual AI who runs a channel by the name Hizana Ai or something. I don't know much about her at all, I just happen to see her picture here and there, so I recognized the character instantly.

It seems that now she is doing interviews for some reason. There are a lot of competitors so I am not surprised. Anyone can get popular by putting on a fake face on your skin nowadays—it doesn't matter whenever you are girl or a boy. I just hate that fact, more than the stupid masses that follow them, that people with honest opinions are obscured.

[Yes you are right about me being all those things, though I don't take that much pride out of it. My name is Xyl,

I ran community events here and perhaps on several other games from time to time. But that's not a big deal really.

People come and go and start organizing themselves, I'm just their catalyst, like in online streams I make the chat...]

[Yes yes, I see? You are like their guru and the sheep are following you? That's quite cute ehehe~]

[I wouldn't call them sheep or anything, but you are generally on the point. They follow me and I would keep at that.

I never asked for any donations or support in the first place because I thought that would be overusing my position.

On top of that, all my income usually just goes into streaming so I always try to give back to the subscribers.]

[Giving back you say? Not overusing your position? But how about the times where you ask people to follow and stuff?

That's kinda like that don't you think? Are you a hypocrite? ehehe~ just joking, I'm in the same situation after all.]

Though, she didn't look like she meant that at all. Xyl started looking a little bit annoyed already, I was too actually. She clearly just uses her very silly sounding voice to form negative, aggressive words in order to draw the attention of the viewers to her persona. That way she will probably look like she is the one leading the conversation, though that is just awful. If I could I would beat her up right there. Alas, I was on the different side of the screen, watching a video inside of a virtual game, all thanks to technology of tomorrow.

[So tell me about when you started getting popular? Do you remember the good old days, the bad old days when you...]

[I would not call them bad since I had a lot of fun streaming for friends only. You know, now that I think maybe I should...

go back in time and do some kind of event like that. I have far too many people following me whenever I log in into the game.

Whatever I do, there are always some named folks that put on a joking personality and do their thing, just to show off their gag,

over and over and over. It's quite annoying I must say, like I have other people telling them to stop and that ends up chaotic.]

[Ohoho~ I get that. It’s like when like I hit furniture with my leg, people believe that's my gag, but it really hurts you know?

Normal people don't even know how much work is put into making a single video, so they don’t understand “I don’t have time”.

“Where is the video?” “Are you going to do this thing?” and stuff, that's all they care about, right Xyl? You have your clips, right?]

[They appear yes, people make them and I have no control over them. If you were to judge my channel based only on those pieces,

it would be a whole different impression. That is why I don't approve of them, yet I'm always hearing "I came here because of them".

It's something I can't explain and I never will. You are a streamer and a video maker, so you probably understand their meme niche.]

In a yes-yes notion, the virtual AI girl nodded as if she knew exactly what the topic was. But from her idiotic expression, anyone could tell she had no idea what was said. Now you would wonder really, why do people like her get popular even? I began to question humanity choices lately more seriously, so I don't really want to look for a coherent answer right now.

[So you are like the others eh? Not even like good market researchers can tell what is going to be the next internet sensation,

therefore viewers, you should definitely support your favourite channels and tell your friends about them. Ehehe~ just kidding.]

[On that topic, far in the past, even before 2010, there were channels that literally stole content from other creators.

Their ideas were exactly the same, down to the video time, just with a different commentary. Some got really mad and started ranting,

but in the end they couldn't get back the popularity that was stolen. Furthermore some bigger channels started their thing.

They copyrighted certain video format so that people could not reprint their work and make money out of it, quite a low move.]

[Oh so like they figured out a scummy way to make even more money? Wow, I should try that someday, maybe... okay,

back on topic, do you have any tips for people starting their channels and maybe not knowing what to do at all?]

[Well obviously the number one rule is to have fun for yourself, without that smile no one will laugh along with you.

Just after that you can start holding back that joking personality and putting on a more serious face for your thing.

I will be frank, if you don't start like a complete idiot, you will probably never break two digits. And by that I mean,

sure you can stream for like five or ten people, but treat it only as a hobby and nothing more, okay guys? Hence...]

And with that, the conversation turned into something else, and the topics got more personal by the minute.

[Yes, maybe you can tell us more about your personality? Everyone is just dying to hear about your gaming addition, ehehe~]

[Gaming addiction is not what I would call my life. There are aspects of my job, as I call it, that are different.

For example, when I stream I don't actually play games, but create content for others to watch. I need to edit it,

think about the general tone, and prepare it that it would be high quality. All those things do matter in the end,

and quite frankly, are more important that just enjoying my time. Without even trying I would feel bad for others.]

[Don't you feel bad for how low you have fallen though? I mean certainly gaming is not the most popular hobby out there,

as there are people who simply give it a bad name without thinking. Yes, in history we did revert to the old ways...

but video games are something fun right? It's not a huge waste of time that is simply regarded as an addiction by the WHO?]

As in World Health Organization who deemed certain gaming behaviours as a Gaming Disorder, reverting the general public image of video games back to the times when they were supposedly responsible for mass shootings. It doesn’t change that fact that if you said you play video games to an employer back then you wouldn’t be taken seriously at all. That one thing is still the same.

A brief history of the change was that during the case of Synapse, when it was branded as an unintentional sex toy due some incidents, people got more concerned about video games, and that gave the politicians the tool to force new legislations into the system. It was because the rapid grow of technologies, advancements in brain science, immersive entertainment, and of the fear that one day we might face a future where everyone is wired, losing the sense of reality.

Between normal humans however, and after all that mess, we can only jokingly say to each other that we are all addicted from video games. On the internet it became more like a meme even. Literally no one thinks that way, since everyone played some video games at some point in their life. So when someone pulls out WHO, then they are clearly being rude on purpose.

[It is… but your tone is a little bit off there. Whatever woeful thing you do as a hobby can become your passion eventually.

Doesn't matter if you treat it as a complete joke at first, in due time, if your determination is rock solid, you will learn,

and appreciate the effort you put into something meaningless. Because that is you, who you became thanks to your decisions.

Embracing that is necessary to find a way of life that would work for you, rather than being chained to the monotony of life.]

Yes, as you know very well, you can't become more than you know. The thoughts inside your brain are limited, and so are you choices. Therefore, to concentrate on gaining more information should be your goal in life, right?

[Is that the truth really? What if it is precisely the excess of information that causes your choices to become more limited?

Convictions that allow you to segment useful information from the hurtful ones... Will you understand now?]

But at the same time too much information can lead to confusion. Can someone be satisfied in life knowing that they could have done better things, made better choices? And then, there is the bliss of ignorance which can be a blessing as well... The AI continued mocking the interviewee.

[You know, now that you say so, I have found one of your old videos talking about that subject. You said something...

like it is okay to learn from others because it helps to expand your horizons. Yet you didn't say the word copy.

Obviously the footage, that was used to prove your point, came from another channel. Do you remember that video?]

[Let me guess, the one that I deleted but somehow got repuloaded again? It's nothing that I identify with now.

I said a lot of things in the past, which might contradict with the current me, although that is fine in the end.

If you progress from your mistakes, you are making a good step forward. Though I rather had that erased for good...]

[I see, that is quite a difficult topic for you eh? Care for explaining further what exactly...]

...

[Those virtual AIs again... what a bother.]

Besides me, someone reasonably started commenting on the video that was playing on the screen. It was a small boy, though he looked like he watched too much edgy stuff. His dark cape and dual blades was probably why I thought that. He also looked at me with eyes that demanded a reply, so I said to myself that I am fine with listening to him.

[You know, I don't have anything personal against people who stream and make money online, but they are the worst.

Just look on how many people tried, and yet only those lucky, and with a sponsorship, got anywhere. All those others...

poor fellows and failures are out there, waiting for the next big boom that will make their dreams come true, somehow.]

[That's interesting, although it would picture the modern economy very well. What is so different about that and a normal job?]

[You don't know? It's obvious if you look at Hizana Ai, she is like a number one example of how the internet works.

First of all, her voice is fake—she uses a voice synthesiser all the time, and does that even in her live interviews.

Furthermore, her videos are not original, we had plenty of virtual AIs before, and they all upload similar content.

It's not that they try, they are all copycats, and the slyest is the victor, while the rest must be satisfied by leftovers.]

[You must have the evidence to back that up right? I wouldn't be that quick to judge a person based on assumptions.]

But the boy was ready for that. Opening some menus he gave me a few links to the videos that were all too similar. They were titled like "Why AIs are ruining the world" and "Fake personalties online, the new AI boom" and so on...Geez, if I had the time I would probably just waste an evening on uncertainties and half-truths for no good reason.

[The evidence is there, and I wish you, pathetic humans, that you will understand one day. It's all just smoke and mirrors,

you should not believe a single word they say online. But I don't have the will to deal with you either, so later alligator.]

With that, the boy quickly left my sides, though he didn't quite finish what he wanted to say. Was his concern valid? I have decided to watch at least some...and then the links lead me to other things. The result of my internet travels was that...I felt little distanced from humanity.

===

I found myself at a giant concert hall, it was spacey and the crowd was surprisingly packed. Squiggling my way in, joining the rest of the people, I was too a part of this event now. For some reason, I had just felt the need to do it, maybe because I was going through a change that was rapid, and desired new sensations without thinking.

My coat was now buttoned from the neck to the thighs, so that it would not get in the way of others or something. The medium olive hair was a bit longer, more wavy and wild, since I decided to leave it unkempt for some time. The short shoes I used to were now upgraded to their longer version, while the chest and bottom part were now replaced by an amber shell-like armour. This look suited me more I thought, so I changed my avatar a little, which let me feel a little bit lifted I guess?

The more I waited the more I grew worried that I was wasting my time. This concert was a completely virtual event. Of course I was curious how did that work, but also a little nauseous about others besides me. They were fired up, while I was just standing there, with my face having a dead expression. Are they really looking forward to this?

[Huh? Someone tugging me from behind? Who could it be? ]

Without a word, a little girl dressed in white pulled my hand, trying to get my attention. She did look like unlike others, her face a little shy, finding a space she would feel comfortable in. It might just be this game, but compared to my size, she was definitely a child. I don't even remember when I was as young as her, but she looked awfully adorable nevertheless.

[Okay sure, I guess your problem is that you can’t see well? Don’t worry, you are not going to miss anything interesting anyway.]

Her tiny finger started moving, producing some words on a sheet of paper. It was her way of communicating with others. I heard of those mute people. Thanks to the VR they were able to talk with others without vocalizing their sentences. I felt like respecting her privacy and decision. She worked quite fast, and with an anxious and embarrassed face. With her stretched out arm delivering her message to me, I started reading it, despite the lack of space and poor lighting.

[N... no thanks I'm fine, I just can't see from below here.

I'm also sorry to bother you... I will be on my way now.]

Was the thing written on the paper. I read it out loud for some reason.

[Not at all, but there is not enough space near the stage anyway. I would not recommend that route.]

As I returned the paper to the quavering hand of the little girl, she then disappeared without making a sound. I was feeling it too—their bodies were all up to me, trying to squeeze me out. Technically, I could turn off Synapse, but I don't think that would be the way to go, since the virtual world itself is quite boring without touching it.

Therefore I have decided to retreat as well, not feeling like giving any more effort in this hollow endeavour. The crowds of people, they are not something I would want to experience lately. All this information that is useless and harmful, it reached me and helped me realize that my research is for those pricks. They would never be any grateful.

Getting my mind back into the situation I was in, I started moving away from the mindless mob and into the seats area. There I would find another person who was not interested in joining others, the little girl I met just a second ago. She was sitting in a seiza, and was looking curiously at the distance. I do wonder what was on her mind at the moment.

[Hey are you okay sitting next to each other? You seem really disinterested in all of this, yet you said you wanted a better view.]

With an awkward expression, the girl before me gestured me to join her. I wasn't quite sure how she would react it seems, but I tried to be at least friendly with her. It was clear that she was not your usual person, not in her fashion or demeanor at least.

[Are you the same lady... Yes it's fine, you are welcome to sit wherever you like.

But please don't expect me to talk much... I am a little shy as you can clearly see...]

She then handed me out that message. I guess I will be communicating with her like this now. She had a bunch of them, some of which were commercial posters from the game. “Tired of the mundane real world? Experience a whole different one!”, “Had enough of nothing happening in your life? Your story awaits to be written!”, ”Want the good old days to be back? Your childhood dreams are not dead yet!”, “Disappointed in humanity’s immutable progress? Why not create your own world?”, things like that were written on their backside.

[Perhaps you were invited by someone, but they decided not to come? You don't look like a fan or something, neither do I.]

Support creative writers by reading their stories on Royal Road, not stolen versions.

[Oh... yea let's just say that is what happened... I don't really want to explain.]

[My name is Squeggie by the way, maybe with that you will get more talkative right?]

[It's like... fine, my name is WRose... I'm pleased to meet you.]

But with that brief introduction out of the way, the concert was nowhere near starting yet. There must be some kind of problem, one that I wouldn't know anything about. Checking with my tablet, nothing is posted on the internet either. In the meantime, my stomach grew hungry, so I figured this would be a good time to grab something to eat. Saying that I mean in the virtual world, in reality I'm trying to lose weight. This way at least I would have the illusion of being fed, which helped with the diet.

My choice was the Mapo tofu, a warm and spicy dish that would be very suitable for the outdoor environment. Quite frankly, I did ask the other girl if she wanted some, but I guess she was afk or something. So, without waiting for her to come back, I sunk my spoon and granted my mouth with the filling taste of red hot sensation. I can't recommend this to everyone though.

In the meanwhile I looked at the stage, it seems it was preparing or at least keeping the guest entertained? It was a light show, various neon lights of simple colours and holographic imagery. I recognized this aesthetic—it was the so called lost future that was never meant to be.

[This looks hot... I mean are you really okay with stuff like that?]

And it also seems she was back. Because I was entranced by the show and had my mouth in the soup she had to push the sheet directly into my face to get my attention.

[It's just a simulation, come on. You can try some if you want.]

[I rather not... it's fine if I just watch you eat it. Is this really that spicy...]

[Yes, it's Mapo tofu, though it tastes nothing like the original one. I usually eat to have my mind cleared.]

With a nod of assertion, the other girl thanked me for the offer. Though she was not interested in eating, her attention was caught by how my cheeks got red from the spiciness and how my mouth released puffs of air. She must have been hungry herself or something, thus she went to get her own food. That was my assumption about why she went afk.

[Did you notice the lights on the stage? I know this style, it’s reminisce of the past paradise that was never meant to be.

It symbolises the transient day-to-day life style of humans nowadays. We grew up taught the future would be great,

but here we are as grown-ups, and the result is unchanged...we did not diverge from adults we feared to become in the end...]

[That’s interesting, but how about some food? You’re not hungry? Oh well...]

And then we were back to being silent, until she felt like speaking again.

[Say... you don't happen to know something about the idol that is going to perform?

Usually you become a fan first, and then follow them like in a cult or something...

But this is my first time attending a virtual concert so I was really excited to see...]

[I have no idea, I just came here with the flow, though that wouldn't be too accurate. Let me say that,

I just happened to pass by and got really interested into knowing why there is this many people waiting in the line.

Obviously it has to be some kind of very famous and young idol that is usually seen only on television...]

[I wish I could listen to her music beforehand too, because I do some stuff myself… I mean I did in the past…

Anyway, she is an AI, you can see the posters all over there... I guess that is a 3d model? It looks kinda cute…]

[Oh, so it's not even a real person, just some kind of voice and movement recorded previously?

Then why the hell people would ever buy into that? Have they nothing better to do that pretend?]

Within seconds the situation changed, perhaps to the overheating of my body. I felt invigorated all of a sudden, like the energy of the crowd, or even a stronger sensation, was filling me, shouting and demanding imminent release. This emotion, I knew not the name of, but strangely felt very welcoming to me. I stood up from the seat and...

[Pretending you say... well don't need to get all riled up from a single meal, though it did look very spicy.

I mean... yes, maybe it is fake and everyone is being deceived, but it’s not different from how it is in reality.

It takes weeks or months of practice to be able to sign and perform a single song, the same goes for virtual idols.

They need to perfect their act, just like the actors in reality. It doesn't really matter...in the end the effort is similar.]

...received that as her reply.

[But it's not! It's far from what it supposed to be. Do you have any idea about what it means to be a performer?]

[Well... yes, here and there I did write songs. I can understand what process of creativity goes into that,

but besides that, it’s how far I can realistically go. I don't think I would be every able to do it live...

I don’t have the voice or the skills to do that, even in VR… but despite not knowing I still have the respect for them.]

[Just the respect eh? I thought so. Listen WRose, no offence but real people are not all about glamour and glitter,

they are about scum and vile, the worst of the characteristics that are hidden deep beneath their online personas.

They steal their performance from others, and when someone shows evidence, it only gets worse from thereon out.

As an Idol you need to hate humanity and use your fans. That is what I learned, that’s the reality of popularity contents.]

With her eyes not connecting to mine, I noticed that she is looking at the stage itself, thinking deeply. Yes, perhaps I might have lost my temper there, but I got involved personally. As a researcher I want to create a better life for everyone, and I will demand their satisfaction. Even if I have to save those that are clearly not worth saving, my work is the same, or at least similar to giving them the dreams of the stage. I shall not accept someone doing it half-assed.

[So to tell you the truth... I wish I was like them, not a fake but a real deal... It's not just an impossible dream,

it's a part of me that I can't leave behind. I want you to know Squeggie, that despite we have just have met now,

I find this quite humiliating to mention. So I must apologize. I'm going to excuse myself and take my leave... I think.]

[No, you are not. I see that you are like others—running away from finishing what you have began. Give up on your dreams,

leave this place and never come back. If that is your decision then you must feel the same as me, tired from humanity,

wanting a change and yet not seeing anything progressing. It probably will take time until you will start seeing effects,

but if you give up at that stage, you will never reach your dream. At least, I hope I will be able to reach it with my research one day…]

[That's not... listen, I would want to explain to you, but I can't. Dreams are not something that is easily granted,

and unlike your research, they might be impossible to come true ... Unlike your research, I can’t talk about my...]

No matter if they are impossible and go against common sense, they are still something that remains with you forever. I want to save humanity, but people themselves don't care if the world changes for the better or the worse... therefore only one choice remains for me.

===

The night was set and after that, no idols were seen. I think I have dozed off, looking at something at the screen, but the concert ended up getting cancelled. Most people, including WRose, logged out, though a few remained. It was silent, and the only sound in my head that the quiet droplet of water hitting the surface of a puddle.

When I opened my eyes, it started raining all of a sudden, and my hair would get wet, though I forgot I was still in VR. The sky was dark blue and transparent. I got up from the chair and began looking around. The people making noise near the stage were engaged in a discussion. It was probably something interesting so I jumped down to take a look. Furthermore, something else there was peculiar.

[The true face of the idol... well this is a bunch of random information posted on the boards or something.

Have you realised that it might be fake? How fast are you to judge our beautiful AI without any evidence?]

[Are you dumb or something? You can see all the references, and you probably did not even check them yourself.

Here, I can tell you this much, the information is pretty accurate, I had my friend, who was a part of it, confirm it.]

[She got doxxed! You guys have no shame talking about it? It's clearly a set-up, so who cares if it’s accurate or not.

If someone got that kind of dirt on you would you be happy about it? The answer is no, there is no human that...]

[But she is not the human! You guys will never understand the appeal of an AI! It's because she is virtual,

and not a real person, her super cute signing voice gained this much popularity over the other competitors.

I could even say more, she is more real than all the other fake virtual idols because she is pure and...]

This was evidently going to end physical, and I didn’t want to be a part of it. Even with a synthesiser or a model, she was truly a pathetic idol, but luckily now her career should be over. Oh well, one less won't change a thing. Then again, who did that really, someone with the skill to gather all this hard to come information I guess? They did even dig up photos of her in real life made by a professional stalker, and the idol probably deserved it.

Nevertheless, whenever this was the truth or fake, it was masterfully performed. I wish I had that kind of skills, but for me there is still a long road ahead. After dealing with this concert, I probably need to resume my plan, though I find that hard to continue now. For some reason, in the midst of the moment, I realised something.

My original plan was to find a reason to why I work as a researcher, why do I want to revolutionize humanity with technology. This project that I was working on, the quantum brain model, was nearly complete, but had little of value without a purpose. I thought originally we would be able to directly control minds, but that was out of the question now. So what was left...

[You don't need to listen to what everyone is saying sis, they are bad people and I just want to beat them up good.

But it's not like they know what they are doing. Just ignore them, as long as you are with me we are strong right?]

[Yea... I just thought that they might be right about one thing... that fake things are most beautiful gifts.]

[Well, I dunno, maybe they are right. Perhaps within the virtual reality that is true, but it's still fake, right?

You create a fictional world with others, not just by yourself. That's why it's pretty, don't you think Pina?]

[You are right... together with sis, I feel like we can definitely do something about it...

But I’m a little weird right now... this drizzle is not exactly how I imagined the game to feel like.]

Two twins dressed in an orange and yellow yukatas were soaking in the rain behind me. I moved to the side, as noticed their interest. Someone placed a sign in the middle of the stage, one all the doubtful information on the idol, but to my surprise really, the girls were no trying to read it. Instead they become deep in thought and pondering about something specific.

[You remember when I talked about my not useful and hardly profitable skills? You see sis,

in this game you can make outfits for sale, and you just require some 3D modelling knowledge.

I was thinking if you would be interested in helping me, since I'm not that good at texturing.]

[Like um... 2D stuff right? I will think about it, but I can't promise anything.]

[Oh come on, you know that I wouldn't ask you if I would not done planning before hand?]

[You had a plan all this time? Oh well... I guess I will have to follow along.]

The drops of rains kept showering the stage in silence as the two girls left my vicinity. Yet again, I found myself alone in front what appeared to be the final answer. No one else attempted to face it. The truth is that the humanity is ignorant and able to perceive only the surface of things. They are sunken deep into their own shells of convictions. And yet, I can't blame them for not paying attention to the reality of things.

What is there left to do for people who want to change the world for a better place, when virtual reality is what they wish for? If that is the extent of dreams, then I must too believe that what I was doing was towards that direction, the realisation of desire.

[Is it wrong to believe the world to be so? Further ruminations are for naught, they plague the mind.

The nature of truth is the solution to a problem, not the state of finding the answer. You are not alive,

yet you realised just what it means to hatch from an egg. Now come and face me, the path awaits.]

[Wait what? Who is that voice?]

I turned my head and looked in every direction. Though the rain has stopped, a thick fog appeared around me. The voice was not mine—it was a man that was dressed in something resembling a nearly destroyed raincoat. He spoke to me from afar, but now that he came close I realised that he was addressing me, there was no one else.

[What do you mean by not alive? Are you going to tell me I'm just a figment of my virtual imagination?

I think we are way past as a civilization to be actually delving on fabricated figures of philosophy.]

[And yet the only thread of hope lies within what can't be seen with the eye of the spectacles. For you see,

without the visor the world only appears more disordered. You know that very well my child, but there is more.

Answer, is there a universe more true that the one inside of a brain? Is objectivity only a translucent concept?]

[Nay, I don't find that necessary a lie but not the complete truth. If people see what they want to see,

then the eyes are not what is important. It is that, without the overlooking distance, there is bliss.

I sure realise it now, the essence of hope lies in blindness, just like your eyes are, mister...?]

His eyes were close... or it was more like I couldn’t even see if his face had eyes to begin with. The image was blurred.

[I'm Squeggie.]

[Ah yes, you are interested, just like I foretold. But a trail awaits you my child, the one that will show you determination.

I require you not to know what is going to transpire afterwards, but be ready for something completely unexpected to happen.]

This was his invitation to fight, but he didn't seem to be the one I would be fighting. Instead, behind him a shadowy figure raised from the ground. It was grotesque and only barely resembled a human. This was a video game after all, thus it wasn't scary at all. I just had to beat it up it right?

[So wait, why would I fight this thing? Are you like a summoner or something? I have no idea you could do that.

I rather refrain from combat unless I would know exactly what I'm doing here, like that's a real enemy there right?]

[But, is the real enemy not the person I'm facing?]

[Wait it spoke? Jeez, this is getting crazy.]

Just before I could use my mouth again, there was a piercing sensation running through my brain. Like a drop of water, the voice echoed in my mind, deformed and unnatural. I couldn't recognize it, though only an image surfaced. Was that really how I did sound? When you hear yourself on a phone or a computer, it’s not your real voice but…

[Well sure, I can accept that this is a bit forceful, but again I don't plan on fighting that thing.

You understand right, mister? I still didn't get your name so if you were this polite and keep that...]

[I don't think you realise that he is no longer here, do you?]

[Wait you must be right about that. Yes, this thick fog, he disappeared before telling me anything. Oh well,

I guess he won't be seeing how this is going to end, because I don't plan on starting anything. Anyway...]

[Hey, I know you are at least a little interested in how I was created, yes? If I'm a real player....

or perhaps someone completely different? Truth is, I don't even know myself. I'm just a lost person,

in the sea of pathetic humans who are not worth saving. Smooth sails from here on out, for people who gave up.

The only path that remains for us is sinking downwards. Yet, might you accompany me, we shall travel together.]

I don't plan on giving up yet, I think? But quite honestly I do want to run away. Hence I dash, but the fog is there. I try to smash it with my fists but...no effect. This must be a dream right? It's a virtual reality thing so I am not sure. Still, it makes more sense if all this was happening outside of the game’s reality. Vaguely I recalled something, the "Ghost AIs" that live in this game. They are most likely the reason why I was caught in this position.

The other option is to fight, but what did that old man said? Something about perspective and becoming alive...I could just log out, but I don't really care if anything happens to this avatar anyway. This is really something—I rather experience it than to cheat my way out. So he also said something about finding the truth and a trail...

[Yes I can tell, you are trying to escape but this shape is not the one you are fighting against.

Accept what has been given to you, the gift that is only one step away from full realisation.]

The horrific shape turned into a puddle that extended ever so slowly towards me. Was that an attack? I knew I didn't have the space to dodge, since the fog acted as a wall. Yet this voice...it began to change. No longer could I tell whenever I hear someone, or something. It was mechanical and twisted in many ways, and although it wasn't human, you could not tell if it was robotic either, something like a broken synthesiser.

The pain in my head filled my senses and I could no longer bear it, thus I attacked it. I used my Dash, and tried using my fists, but the creature did not receive any damage. Then I tried skills, everything, but in the end that only spread the black tar under my feet. This opponent was clearly nothing I could defeat.

And still, the least I could do was to swing at it while I tried to keep my distance, away from the dark puddle. Getting closer to the wall, using Dart in between, my options got limited to only jumping. I knew then that I was not able to defeat it with my fists, so perhaps I needed to change my tactic then? The remaining approach was to please it with words, thus I produced a voice.

[Could you stop perhaps? I mean I don't want to get near this thing you are spreading, so if you kindly would.]

[I reckon not... I do believe you want this more than you think.]

[Wait what? You think you know me better, whoever you are? I don't know you.]

[But I know you...]

That was the remainder of our conversation before something else happened unexpectedly.

===

The path of humans is something understandably interesting for any mind. How do they function and how they exist? Is the essence something that can be regarded as fictional, or is there a factual matter? Perhaps when you know as much, when you are convinced that humans have brains that deny the existence of free will, then you will too agree to look for more.

There is only one way for that to be possible however. Say that we would conduct an experiment and see if we predict what brain would think under a certain stimuli. In case if the reaction was always as we thought, the nature of the brain is fully deterministic as we can fully manipulate the reaction by using the correct stimuli. If it was the opposite, if we wouldn’t be able to predict it at all, then the brain would be deemed random. Since we can say that free will does not constitute an accidental nature, as we can’t call something “free will” if we can’t in fact control it, we can also say that if we accurately ascertain that the brain is entirely unpredictable then we will also disapprove of the existence of human volition entirely.

For generations many people have thought about it, yet just recently, thanks to the findings of the Human Connectome Project, we started talking about it again. And it seems that we have some ideas, like the Morphic Fields, but still we can’t “manipulate” free will and experimentally “turn it off” to see where exactly it exists. By that I mean let’s return the example and say it is possible, but unlikely, that people can choose to behave randomly out of their own volition. This way we can say that even if we get random results in that experiment, it’s not like it denies free will. Only once we find it physically existing and we manage to “turn it off” we can’t say for sure it’s not there, right?

[However that doesn’t change the fact that, according to the experiment, humans will always act randomly unless they choose to use their “free will” differently.]

Working on the model of the quantum brain we found that no matter how many times we did reset the process, the answer was random. We asked the robotic brain multiple questions, but the response was not as we, humans, predicted. With our team knowing so, two solutions were given. One was that free will doesn't exist in the model we constructed, and that our minds work differently. Yet, the other one being less bright, which was that the experiment showed that human brains were deprived from autonomy.

I figured that looking at how people function in the world would give me some hope—that I would give up on my interpretation—but I was mistaken. Sinking deep into the black depths, my eyes did not want to open. Beneath the VR headset, they were yearning for it. Knowing less is appreciating more about the world around you. Ignorance was something which all those pathetic humans had, and I wanted it too.

[My body feels different—this is not sinking any more. Wait what did happen? I fought a monster and got defeated.

I probably got killed, but is this really how I should feel after death? I am not sure but sure about that right now,

yet all I have to do is open my eyes right? The question is really, do I want to? Is there something I could do...]

Well, there is one thing, I remember my good friend of mine from the real life, though we met more in the virtual world. Despite what everyone thought, he was always a bit cynical about stuff. Although he didn’t know a solution to many problems of humanity, neither did I obviously. As for now, should I choose to wake up now and see clearly what I was sensing now? He would say yes, because he knew that doing nothing was the wrong thing. Hence, despite my fear and uneasiness, I did the only thing I could.

I opened my eyes slowly to see what exactly was wrong with my body. I was still inside the virtual world, yet it felt a lot more restraining. I found that I was sitting in a chair, next to a table in a room that was dark and quite badly lit. I saw holes in the wooden floor, some doors closed, an empty and very dusty bookcase and a chimney place. All this thick dust was neglected since a long time.

As for myself, I noticed that I could move my head around, but the controls would not respond. I wanted to stand up but...I appeared to be tied up to a chair and unable to escape. This is something similar to a grab, so I thought I would use my Vault. Nevertheless, that did not have any effect either. Strangely I didn't feel threaten at all, this was just a simulation.

[Hey, is this some kind of content I wasn't told about? You know that I can report that to the committee, I think?

Anyway I do figure that someone had to done it already, and this is clearly not how the game supposed to look like. My hands,

and my legs are tied up to this chair and I can't even move them. Wait a second, what if were to use body tracking?

Nope, that doesn't work, though it moves my body a little. Maybe I am supposed to use my hands to untie the tape in VR?]

Recreating the position in reality I tried to twist my hands, yet the restrains were not any looser. That was clearly useless, so I figured I maybe I could stand up, but only my feet were lifted from the ground. Any other ideas were even more dangerous, like tilting the chair down along me, while I had the VR on. Doing so would make me the next virtual AI with a broken leg, or at least destroy the chair I was sitting on.

Anyway, all I could do was to log out and log in right? I might as well try, I thought, but the results were the same. I was just in the same exact position as before, which didn't seem quite pleasant now. I suppose I could ask a GM for help, but as I waited for the ticket get send, I noticed that I might be able to use my teleport stone. The answer to that was no.

In this strange situation, maybe I was overreacting a little, since this was just a game after all. In due time, I am going to get released and someone will apologize to me. Considering the nature of this game however, I doubt that. They really are not afraid of doing this kind of stuff to the players, so I have heard, based on the past events.

[If someone hears me, please answer. I'm not going just to wait here forever, so you better show up okay? After all,

I could just go afk sitting here, since nothing is going to happen from the looks of it. Yes, I think I will just...]

[No, that won't be necessary. Pardon for my welcoming gift, this is how the devs have programmed that chair.]

Before me, entering through the door a familiar face from before appeared. Somehow, I started to feel nauseated.

[I can release you though I rather not. The matter at hand is more worrying that you might expect, thus listen well.

Your freedom and captivation lies within yourself, thus feel free to speak your mind. Your will is a factor of existence.]

To have free will, to be able to decide for your own, are the means to being alive...

[It would be appropriate to tell me who you are minster. We have met before but you haven’t introduced yourself.]

[I am the one called Schuld, bother not with petty semantics. You have called me and I appeared.

There is no other matter, thus ponder no more. What I wish you to consider shall take all your attention.]

Right, I called for help but I haven't realised that this is going to be like that. Is this guy really a GM though? In any case, I figured that I can at least listen to what he has to say for now, and then I'm going to beat up him.

[So what are you going to tell me Schuld? You didn't set this all up just to have a chat?

I can't believe that honestly, but yet this seems like a way that is too fitting for this game.]

[Quite so I'm afraid, since other options I was left with are just pathetic. The matter at hand is very confidential,

so I must trust that you will not speak of it outside. I would not want to be mistaken, since I chose you out of all of them.]

[Chose me in particular? What is your plan exactly? Maybe if you answer me that first I would be able to understand.

As you said, right now I'm in a bit of a bind. If you don't mind releasing me, I am sure we could talk more freely...]

[Would that be necessary? I think this question will solve everything then. Allow me to propose you a game of choice.

Say that you had a gun, you can use it to kill someone in order to fix the world, or you can offer it to that person,

along with the decision whenever they are going shot themselves. Doing so, you have no guilt and the world will be saved.

Alternatively, taking the shot yourself will forever plague you with the responsibility for doing a wrong thing. What you say?]

Wait, shooting someone in order to save the world? This is clearly something allegorical, not matter how I look at this. We did have leaders and humans that were doing a lot of bad things, but just getting rid of them does not repair anything. Yet, that’s a little shallow. I think the meaning is more hidden that just that, the set up is just too profound. How about this...

Maybe the gun is the solution that would not be allowed normally, but for some reason, circumstances would permit for that. Furthermore, if you give the decision to another, your future guilt and consequences are mitigated, to the extent they vanish. So what is left is the choice between doing something horrible but beneficial for others, or giving up your chance at that.

Now that I think about it more, perhaps this unspeakable act for others is something that could bring a better tomorrow for the society? How else would the scientist change the present, if not by forcing something completely foreboding? The example is the virtual world, no one realistically wants to live in here, yet the desire of leaving the real world is present. Let’s consider that someone did that, they created a world in which humans are able to leave their bodies. Something like that would be deprecated by the populace, but also seen as a blessing in a way...

[This took me a while, but contemplating about this made me realise what I did thought for a while now. Mind control,

brain configuration and invasive techniques, they are not something we can do in full realization, but there are other things.

For example, if we made the person believe they were hearing their own voice, then surely that mystification would work.

To a certain extent we could influence decisions forcibly, but that wouldn't be very nice to the populace, wouldn't it?]

[Interesting, but I am afraid I was asking for something else. Truly your obvious options are either to shot,

or to give the gun away, but yet you can leave without doing anything. Bare freedom to choose anything and I shall comply.]

[No I'm certain of it, I can't do that, but there is another way we can improve ourselves. I just need to find...]

[If you are going yourself a vague answer, then I am going to give you less choice and present you with a more dramatic situation.]

In a blink of an eye, he brandished his two pistols on the table—one was slid towards me and the other in his hand. Because one of my hands got free, I was able to catch it before it would fall to the ground. Both of us in this room, each equipped with a gun of their own, I found myself knowing that this won't be as easy as the first part was.

[Now tell me, are you going to shot me Schuld, or are you planing something else?]

[So you are afraid still, of death that is. How fortunate to see a fellow human still adhere to such pitiful threads.

Wander not, I shall explain. The essence of grating someone’s wish it to know what is happening to the mind of a twisted person.

Perhaps the other person wants to die, but it is unable to do so alone? This is my wish you see, and I hope you understand.]

[Wait what? After all of this you just want me to kill you? Just because you are unable to do it yourself?

It's just a game! This is not reality so you should come down. I can help you, okay? I know some people,

they can do a pretty good brain surgery that will help you. If anything, the simulations I have heard...]

[Silence your nonsense for now. In due time, you will understand the connection between this and the other world.

You shall learn the logic behind this senseless madness and find the benefits far beyond the preservation of self.

For now I only plead that you will take this deliberately and not literally, for there are far more benefits to shooting.]

We remained each other in silence—there was no other movement in this empty room. Both of our guns pointed at each other, the broken plates on the table, the chairs that took a beating, and then just a single drop in the glass echoed in my ears.

If I was to shoot I would become a killer. If I was to remain motionless I could become a victim myself. It no longer mattered that this was just a game.

[To progress you are required to leave something behind Squeggie, and you still cling onto something precious.

The act of rebirth is through breaking, not by gaining more knowledge. The pain and suffering is necessary I’m afraid,

so that in future you have no shell to return. This is the truth that I wanted to grant you, since you were ever so patient as a listener.]

My chest started pounding—I could feel like something inside of me started to break.

[Wait, what are you planning on doing? I don't know what consequences that would have but please think about yourself, okay?

Maybe I was wrong to quickly judge that humans are pathetic creatures not knowing what kindness means at all but...

killing yourself for your own sake...for the sale of breaking out of the shell...That’s wrong right? That’s not okay at all!]

Yet the only kindness I can show to that person is to take up a sin for his sake...and leave my conviction behind.

[It’s not okay...]

[Are you fighting against yourself now or the corruptions of humans? It matters not to me because it is my choice.

You didn't want to shot—you will be subjected to discovering the truth behind my crocked words. The cycle of life,

I shall be reborn from this shell anew. Just like during sleep human brain is defragmented into more suitable pieces,

this shall too improve my way of thinking. Knowing so Squeggie, what will you do? This path of skinning downwards, will you follow?]

With his hand on the trigger, and the barrel on his temple, he said those words. Afterwards, there was a single gunfire heard, and my finger was in the position...