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Unwind
11. The Things We Carry

11. The Things We Carry

The journey through the woods passed by in an instant. At least that’s how it felt as Lance faded in and out of consciousness. His own worries kept gnawing at the back of his mind as he tried to focus and allow himself to believe in Bael. A sense of déjà vu was all too prevalent as a silent figure led him into the depths of the forest.

Before he knew it Bael was snapping his fingers at him, and they were standing in the heart of the grove with an audience of fairies and imps peering up at their returning human visitor. Lance flinched as the noise alarmed him into an alert state, but quickly followed after him as he was already about to be left behind.

Bael escorted (though it felt more like he was being lured) Lance to a ramshackle building at the opposite end of the grove that he had not been permitted to see during his previous visit. As they approached the number of the audience members drifted away until eventually they were just the lone three. Lance noticed Nyx was beginning to shiver which did wonders for his paranoia at this moment.

“Stay here. I need to make sure that it’s safe inside,” Bael commanded in a whisper.

With a nod Lance became rooted to the spot with Nyx staying right by his side. Bael entered the dilapidated hut all on his own, disappearing out of sight. At first he was stricken by the eerie silence that came from within, then the bone chilling groans that emitted from the inner chamber sank his stomach down to the forest floor.

Nyx placed herself closer to Lance, nuzzling against his face as her tiny body continued to tremble. He gently cupped her entirety with his palm and her movements became more spaced out. A soft sigh escaped her lips.

“Thank you, by the way,” Lance spoke softly, so much that he could barely hear his own words.

“What’s that for?” Nyx answered back with an uncertain lilt in her voice.

“For being the mature one that bashes her level headedness on others who aren’t so prone to acknowledging their shortcomings.”

She tutted before giving a small wiggle against his hand. “I appreciate you being forthright in admitting to it, at the very least.”

“Admitting it isn’t something you’re accustomed to, I take it?”

“Goodness no. You’ve been around him long enough now; you can see what he’s like,” she answered with a small laugh.

“You’re his older sister, right? I believe that’s what he told me.”

“In a roundabout way I suppose it’s the best way to describe our relationship.”

“I wanted to ask you something related to that.” Lance’s weight shifted from foot to foot as his mind deliberated on if speaking what was on his mind would be inconsiderate. It was his best chance with him being rarely alone with Nyx in a calm moment. “Is Bael really a fairy? Or is he something else?”

Nyx’s movements paused, causing Lance to mentally curse as he believed himself to overstep his boundaries. The howls from within the building only added to his building unease.

“He never said he was, that was only your assumption. You know he looks more like you than myself, I’m certain.”

Lance nodded, his Adam's apple bobbing as he dryly swallowed.

“Bael is something in between. I would tell you more, but it’s not my place to do so. With time, I’m sure you will be able to ask again.”

The sound of rattling chains shook the two of them out of their conversation, both uttering a small gasp at the sudden noise. Bael’s heavy footsteps were making their way back outside.

“Please, Lance, continue to be there for him,” Nyx meekly cried right before Bael’s face resurfaced from the darkness.

“It’s safe, you can come in now. Be quiet and don’t make any sudden movements, okay?” Bael did not command him as he usually did. This was the request of someone who was pleading for cooperation. His startling blue eyes stared at Lance, vulnerable, and not at all confident in revealing his secrets. Lance was at the mercy of this look. To defy him was to shatter his faith, not only in him, but in any person whom he might dare to trust.

Lance nodded, and with great trepidation followed after Bael into the dark unknown. Nyx stayed behind, leaving them in total darkness. Chains raked across the rotten wood flooring, an inhuman growl rooting Lance to the spot. Slowly his eyes acclimated to the darkness, revealing to him the truth of the horrific sight.

Peering back at him from the darkness were two pairs of blood-red eyes, unnatural in their glow. They were connected to pitch black sockets on a stark white face. Putrid teeth shined with sickening yellow, chattering as they looked up at Lance. The silhouettes were of humanoid shape, but their bodies were what remained once tissue and muscle had long since rotted away.

“W-what are these things?” Lance whispered, maintaining eye contact with the larger of the creatures.

At the sound of his voice the creatures lunged forward, held back only by the strength of the chains tying them to the floor. They howled, their bodies rattling as they slammed their limbs on the wooden planks. Lance took a step back as he recoiled in fear, instincts screaming at him to run away in terror. He wouldn’t, no, he couldn’t do that. When he remembered Bael’s face, the idea of betraying his faith caused his chest to clench in pain.

“They are stalfos. When humans become lost in the woods their humanity is stripped away from them,” Bael answered as he gently stepped forward within reach of the monsters. Kneeling down beside one of them, he raised a hand to caress it on the head. The monster appeared to croon into the touch, teeth still clacking with a howl. “I am the guardian of these two in particular.”

Lance’s jaw flapped, words escaping him as he came to terms with this knowledge. Growing up in Clock Town, most children would learn about the different peoples and beasts that existed in the world of Termina. Monsters were reserved for lessons at an older age, but they all still learned about them at some point. They were only taught that stalfos were dark fey that preyed on innocents in the darkness. This story about them having once been humans just like him was unheard of, but given that Bael was much closer to the issue than himself he was inclined to believe him. For now, at least.

“Why -er, rather- how did you come about a role such as that?” He stumbled over his words, a shiver running up each time their eyes glanced to look at him.

Bael hesitated, resolved to sit in silence while petting its skull for a few moments longer. “I found them, long ago. They had not been changed for long and begged me to save them. I swore I would.” He stood up from his position which elicited a guttural whine from the beast. With the tenderness of a caregiver he shushed the creature into silence.

“Is there a way to revert it?”

“Much like yourself, I too was enchanted by the notion of the mystical toadstool that can cure all afflictions. I fed some to them I found in the heart of the woods and” -his voice quivered as his eyes became distant, ushering Lance to leave the hut with him- “what little was left of their humanity left at that moment.”

Lance’s blood ran cold once he understood the weight of his words. Hurriedly, he followed after Bael who then sealed the opening behind them. He was greeted by Nyx who took turns nuzzling the both of them in kind, grateful for their return.

“Just because it didn’t help them doesn’t mean they can’t potentially save other people,” Lance spoke aloud to no one in particular. It was a declaration for himself more than anyone else.

Bael’s face crinkled in disappointment before letting out a sigh. “I knew you would feel that way. The very least I could do is try to dissuade you.”

“Even if you don’t help me, I’ll keep looking.”

His face turned downwards, jaw clenching and unclenching in a repeated movement. “I’ll help you, but only after we stop Dumah’s return. If he does, then it will be all for naught.”

Lance abruptly shot out his arm, holding it straight out in front of him. His chest puffed up with his shoulders squared, determination plastered on his face. “Shake on it then.”

Bael jolted, startled by this action, before throwing him a puzzled expression. “What?”

“It’s an agreement between men, so we shake on it. A promise between both of us to hold up our end of the deal.”

With great uncertainty Bael extended his hand and pressed his gloved hand against Lance’s exposed one. Instantly Lance clasped his fingers tightly around Bael’s held eliciting a yelp from the other man. Lance himself was startled by how frail it felt to hold his hand, having expected the rigid strength he was accustomed to.

It was awkward as could be, but a wave of ease washed over them as they shook hands in the middle of the forest. Their hands stayed together for longer before Lance jerked it away to run the same hand through his hair out of nervous habit.

“So, how about going to Clock Town now?”

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Bael smiled with a nod.

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Many hours later Lance was standing in a hot shower letting days of sweat and grime spiral down the drain. He was still reeling from the earful from Abi he’d gotten upon returning home. Luckily Bael took his previous route of climbing into Lance’s bedroom window, as that was not a conversation he was ready to have with her. His father was not home, which was to be expected, so once she was done reprimanding him for disappearing he was free to carry on about his business.

Once the water grew cold -all too soon for his liking- he stepped out of the shower and dried off. Typically, he would lounge in his room with just a towel around his waist, but with a guest in his room he opted for a bathrobe instead. When he entered the bedroom Bael was sitting on his bed, now dressed in an old outfit of Lance’s after getting clean himself. A simple long sleeve shirt and slacks was the most he was able to convince Bael to dress up in. It was much too large for his short and slender body, but it got the job done.

Lance took a seat next to him, but before he could say anything Bael was already reaching around to his side for an object he was obscuring. When he fully turned around to face him, Bael was holding a mask up to his face fashioned in the image of the sun. This caused Lance’s stomach to twist up in knots.

“Where’d you get this cool mask? Are you wearing it to the carnival?” Bael asked playfully, head swaying side to side.

Lance made a half-hearted attempt to snatch it away from him but Bael was too quick, dodging out of his reach. “Why do you have that? Were you snooping in my house while I showered?”

“Nope, it was on your dresser. You don’t strike me as the flashy type that wears a mask of the sun to the carnival.”

“It’s not a mask for the carnival. It’s my father’s wedding mask,” Lance replied in a somber tone.

Bael’s hands holding the mask dropped until it was resting in his lap, his eyes now focused on it intently. “Wedding mask? Who wears a mask to a wedding?”

Lance tried to look at his face to see if Bael was making a joke in poor taste but was surprised to see he was genuine. He wasn’t sure if he’d ever grow accustomed to how many basic things of their culture Bael just was not familiar with at all.

“There’s a bit of a story behind it, actually. Masks have always been worn, but they used to be unique designs crafted by the bride and groom themselves. Then a hundred years ago there was a famous couple who were nearly torn apart by a horrible curse. Despite what they went through, they were joined in holy matrimony on the day of the carnival wearing masks of the sun and moon. A lot of people are inspired by their story, so a sun and moon mask became the norm.”

Lance regaled the tale with a voice full of yearning. The idea of having a beautiful love story the likes of Kafei and Anju was a dream he’d long since held in his early teens. It was unfortunately a dream he’d long since shelved in the recesses of his heart.

Bael looked up at him with his face contorted in uncertainty, an expression Lance was becoming used to seeing more frequently by the day. “Why do you have it?”

“I guess Dad wants me to have it for when I get married,” he answered with a wistful smile.

Bael grew quiet, and Lance had no clue what he’d said that made him draw up in silence. Lance stood up to return the mask to his previous location on the dresser before turning around and clapping his hands together with a grin.

“How do you feel about meeting my mother?”

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Bael’s reluctance to meet a new stranger was written all over his face, but Lance was able to persuade him with the pure joy he radiated when the subject of his mother came up. Lance left his home in fresh clothes feeling rejuvenated and with the weight of the world lessened off his shoulders. Bael met him a distance from his house with his body shrouded in the cloak given to him by Aryn, Nyx assuredly hidden away in the cowl as well.

When they arrived at the hospital and Lance listened briefly outside his mother’s hospital room he was pleased to hear there was no talking on the other side. A good indication his father was not visiting right now. Announcing himself with a polite knock, Lance stepped in before waving for Bael to follow in after him.

His mother gasped, but the smile that followed was genuine and heartfelt. Lance returned with his own affectionate grin before quickly walking over and wrapping his mother in a tight hug.

“Lance! Where have you been? Your father and I have been worried sick about you. You have never run off like that before.” She whacked him lightly on the back of the head but his happiness from seeing her in good spirits couldn’t be wavered.

“Sorry Mom, I had to get out of town. I was feeling stifled by all the things coming up. Making you worry wasn’t what I meant to do,” he answered sheepishly.

She opened her mouth to make another remark before pausing and peering around his shoulder. “Did you make a new friend?”

“Oh, yes!” Lance reached back to grab Bael by the wrist, dragging him forward while the other man yelped in surprise. “Mom, I’d like you to meet my friend, Bael. Bael, this is my mother.”

He slowly nodded his head as his face became flushed, his eyes never losing the intense look he was giving her. “Margaret…” he muttered under his breath.

Lance blinked as his head shook in surprise. “Wait, do you know my mother?”

Bael shook himself out of his trance before hurriedly stepping back behind Lance. “No, you’ve just mentioned her before is all,” he hurriedly replied.

He didn’t recall ever mentioning his mother by name, but he chalked it up to simply forgetting it in the midst of all the excitement they’ve experienced.

“It’s a pleasure to meet you, Bael. Are you from Clock Town?”

Lance stepped in to shake his head and answer for him, having seen Bael now grow to be increasingly uncomfortable with this interaction. “No, he just moved here recently. I took it upon myself to show him around then we made plans to travel around the country. I’ll be leaving again soon, so don’t worry about me Mom, okay?”

She stroked his cheek with her hand. He clasped his own around hers and internally winced at how much she has wasted away from her illness.

“I’ll always worry about you no matter how old you are. You’ll always be my baby boy, Lance.” She tugged at the side of his face indicating she wanted him to lean forward. He did so, and she pressed a kiss with her withered lips on his forehead.

Suddenly, jarring them all out of the serenity of this moment, the door swung open with Lance’s father sputtering as he began barreling towards his son.

“Boy, where in the world have you been? Your mother has been beside herself worrying about you.” His father lunged his hand forward to grab Lance by the shirt and yank him backwards, so they could look eye to eye.

Just as Lance spun around all too ready to face the verbal assault, Bael had laid his hand on his father’s arm and was squeezing it just enough to make the man wince.

“Let him go,” Bael commanded, each word emphasized with an increasing amount of venom.

Lance’s father recoiled in fear before puffing up his chest and getting in Bael’s face. “Unhand me! Just who do you think you are to talk to me like that? I’m his father, if I see fit to reprimand my son I will.”

Bael’s grip must have tightened given the increasing discomfort on his father’s face. “He’s my friend, and he doesn’t have to answer to you if he doesn’t want to,” Bael snarled.

“Bael, enough,” Lance requested softly.

“But…” Bael remarked as he turned to look at Lance’s face, searching for an answer.

“We’re going to go, Father. I received your gift, by the way. Thank you,” Lance politely remarked without an ounce of genuine gratitude to be found.

His father scoffed before releasing his grip on his shirt, which in turn made Bael let go of him. Lance turned back to look at his mother who was completely distressed by the situation, as she typically was when they fought in front of her. Despite how much was changing in his life as of late, there were some things he could always depend on to be consistent.

“I love you, Mother. I’ll do my best to see you soon. Father” -he turned to stare the older man intently in the eyes- “I suppose I’ll at least be seeing you by the time of the carnival.”

After roughly grabbing Bael by the arm, he led the both of them out of the hospital and in the direction of his home. When they rounded a corner onto a secluded street, Bael pulled back and refused to step forward.

“What’s wrong?” Lance asked out of breath, knowing all too well what was wrong.

“Why don’t you stand up for yourself?” Bael asked with eyebrows furrowed, the corners of his lips turned downward.

“I don’t want to upset my mother any further, alright?” Lance tried to pull him forward again, but he would not budge.

“You’re just using that as an excuse. I can tell this is more normal than playing happy family while your mom is sick.”

Lance spun around, flaring up in anger. “Stop talking down to me like you understand everything! It’s more complicated than you could understand in a few minutes.”

“How is it complicated? Explain it for me, so I can understand,” he requested.

Lance paused before looking down, then up, and finally from side to side. “It just is, okay? It’s been like this my whole life and pushing against it now isn’t going to change anything.”

“Lance…” Bael uttered his name with such tenderness it caused his breath to hitch.

He sighed under the intensity of Bael’s expression, feeling his walls he’d built up around the issue beginning to crumble brick by brick. Not enough to completely shatter, however, as this emotional scar was nearly as old as Lance was.

“I’ve always hoped that one day I would have the kind of dad that dotes on his child. One day he would look at me and his face would light up the way Mom’s does when she looks at me. So I take his yelling on the chin and try not to fight back, hoping that day will still come.” Lance’s voice began cracking as he spoke, causing him to turn around and start marching towards his home once more, with or without Bael.

“That’s not how you get love. Love doesn’t come from people that treat us terribly while we let them get away with it,” Bael shouted as he hurried to catch up with him once more.

“What good am I to anyone if I don’t strive for their approval? It’s all I’ve ever done my entire life, if I changed now people would probably hate me. Being a pushover is what I’m good at,” Lance answered with an empty laugh.

“Hey now!” Bael shouted, his voice rising so much it alarmed people walking on the other side of the road. “That’s bullshit.”

“Why’s that?”

“We fought this morning, or have you already forgotten?” They’d arrived at the back of his house where Bael would climb up to his bedroom. He started climbing up before pausing and looking back down at Lance who was making no efforts to hide how dumbfounded he felt at this moment.

“You think I pick a fight with important politicians for just anybody? Give yourself more credit than that, come on.” Without another word Bael disappeared over the windowsill, leaving Lance to stare at the wall in confusion.

Nyx flew into his vision from the side, surprising him as he assumed she was still within Bael’s cloak. She hovered in place directly in front of his face which jarred him out of his stupor, earning a nervous laugh from Lance.

“He’s always playing around, huh? It’s hard to keep up with him sometimes,” Lance spoke aloud to divert her focus from himself.

“You’re really thick, aren’t you?”

“Oh, so now everyone is going to make me feel dumb, is that it?” He shot back, trying to lean into what he assumed was teasing but all the while feeling frustrated at his lack of understanding.

“Bael’s trying to say he likes you a lot, dummy. Isn’t that obvious?”

“Oh.”

He supposed it was, all things said and done. It didn’t prevent the heat rising in his cheeks, however.

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They returned at sundown with nightfall quick to follow, so Lance insisted they stay the night there. Much to his surprise, Bael didn’t protest the suggestion. After splitting his dinner that Abi brought up to his room, Lance tucked himself into bed while Bael made himself a nest of blankets near him on the floor.

“Have you decided where we should look next?” Lance asked, unable to find sleep despite the exhaustion that ached in his bones.

“Ikana City will probably be the best place to try for next, given it’s another human settlement. I would imagine you’re familiar with the place and that could give us an edge,” Bael answered with a yawn, his voice partially muffled by the blanket around his face.

“I’ve only been a few times, I don’t know how much help I can be.”

“Do you know anyone that lives there or is familiar with the place? Having a base of operations or just anyone on our side will be advantageous as we look for a possible resurrected god.”

“Well, I do know someone, but it might not be very helpful,” Lance’s voice began to trail off as he answered.

“Why’s that?” Bael asked, sounding more alert.

“She hates my guts.”