The game room buzzed with muttering, as Vinn and Nicole waited in costumes for Dee and Vicki.
Dee strolled out, looking annoyed and carrying her big purse, so you know she meant business.
“Of all things, a damn costume party during a bug invasion. People really just act like nothing is wrong. What the hell are you two supposed to be?” Dee asked.
“I’m Beauty and the Beast.” Nicole smiled. “Both Bell and the beast.” She said twirling in her dress, now fully covered in peach fuzz and rocking very real Delmarian ears.
“I’m the hunky villain guy from the movie." Vinn grinned, "We’re gonna break out into a musical number and sword fight over her, and then I rescue her, and we just ruin the entire movie cannon.”
“Well that’s weird. I’m Zoro, and Hyde is going as a Narcoleptic Delmarian asleep in the weight room with coke on his nose who won't be going. It's super original. We got a pretty meta couple's outfit too ya know.” She said, as Vicki came down the stairs in a black leather and latex outfit, strapped with weaponry rocking orange safety tips and a Nerf Logo.
“Selene from Underworld? Hot. What was the inspiration for that?” Dee asked.
“No reason.” Shrugged Vicki,
“God those fangs look real.”
“Online, plastic.” Vicki blurted.
“Jack going?” she asked.
“He’s going later as Van Hellsing, but he has to finish some work first. He’s gonna make an entrance and do a bit, so if you see a creepy guy flirting with me and me acting like he’s stalking me, just don’t worry about it. We got a thing going.”
“Oh, that’s so cool that everyone has a thing except me. Ready to go?” Dee sighed.
“Silverback and Mel not going?” asked Vinn.
“No, they’re defiling their hot tub and making weird motorcycle noises. We should let them have their space.” Dee groaned.
The group made their way to the bouncer, who scanned everyone for weapons and made sure they were fake. They stepped into the tunnel and turned immediately left to a stairwell that was recently added or renovated, leading down to a very loud open cave area with music going, and costumes out the ass and back in it. They divided and explored.
Vicki stood at the counter, trying to decide if she wanted a drink, or more specifically, one they would have.
“What’s the matter, they don’t have your blood type on the menu?” said a voice clearly trying to sound deeper than his normal one. She looked alarmed and then realized she was dressed as a vampire and so was the guy talking to her. “It’s a joke, Selene. Technically, I should be ordering a serum shot, but I’ll have 2 shots of ever clear and a strawberry grenadine.” He said, looking from her to the bartender, blinking so he got the hint. “And you’ll have?” he pried.
“I don’t know yet. Blade I assume?” she asked as the tall dark man did a dead inside vampire flex and showed his fangs playfully.
“Shouldn’t you technically be hunting my kind?” she asked.
“How do you know I’m not?” he asked, peering over his sunglasses.
“I do have a boyfriend.”
“Well shit. There goes that whole plan. I swear is nobody single anymore?” he said breaking the deadpan character.
“Sorry. I’m sure there are plenty of ladies out there looking for a tall handsome guy slinging free drinks.”
“Yea, but not ones that look like you. You’re some kinda special. So how serious is the boyfriend, is he an asshole and driving you up the wall with his bullshit, and you’re sorta just sticking it out, or is this is a stable thing?” he asked slyly.
“Stable.”
“Well, double shit. I got nothing. This lockdown sucks. The night-life has died, what’s the moon coming to when a good-looking rich guy in his prime can't even find a single lady with any real interest?” he sighed. She stared at him with annoyance. “Okay, I had to try the money card. That was my last move, and you don’t give a shit, hint taken. You have a pleasant night.” He said, making his leave.
“Vicki who hell was that guy?” asked Dee.
“I didn’t get his name.”
“Why not?”
“Because I have Jack.” She said as if obvious and offensive to even suggest.
“Well I’m gonna go talk to him.”
“Dee, I swear it’s like you can’t commit to anything. Are you even considering breaking up with Hyde or just running a double play constantly?”
“I’m not allowed to have friends?” she scoffed.
“Hey there.” Dee said drunkenly leaning on the counter next to him. “So is that a wooden stake in your pants or are you just happy to see me?”
“Neither, that’s… just ma penis.” He nodded with disinterest.
“Okay…so you went with a sword-swingin theme too, hu? I picked this outfit because I get to carry a sword. Fake, obviously they won't let you have a blade over 4 inches on you. But you look like a blade well over 6 foot, and they let you in.”
“Do I know you, or are you just…bad at flirting?” he asked.
“Ugh, I have you know I am damn good at flirting, I am just not flirting, I am bad at drunk introductions. You met my friend Vicki and I wanted to say hi.”
“Oh you’re the redhead’s friend. Nice. So what’s the deal with the boyfriend, is he a real prick, kinda treats her like shit, degrades her, probably deserves a beating?”
“Oh no, Jack’s a total gentleman.”
“Damnit. I can’t go beat up a nice guy that’s a dick move even for me.”
“Oh don’t worry you couldn’t beat up Jack anyway, he’d rock your shit in 2 seconds. He’s basically batman. Now, my boyfriend is a real prick. He’s not even here with me; he’s either watching sports and drinking or snorting coke in the weight room. He got cuck-sniped by an old man recently. Really got his ego bruised.
“Are you trying to hijack my move and use it on me to get back at your boyfriend, or are you just playing into my move to get laid here?” he asked bluntly.
“Well…right to the point aren’t we?” Dee nodded "Respect."
“Wait, I do know you. You’re the E-slut that does the topless gaming thing.”
“Oh my god, are you a subscriber?”
“No. I’ve just seen a clip or two.”
“Oh… We’re not really clicking here, are we?”
“Sorry, I’m just distracted by your redhead friend. She just has that tall, lanky elf vibe but with mean-ass goblin energy. Something about her. Is she human?”
“Yep. A Hundred percent.”
“Are you sure? I don’t really go for humans, no offense, it’s the smell, they just don’t do it for me. She has such a…meaty smell. Like a really top quality steak.”
“Well, that’s creepy and gross.”
“Oh, I don’t mean it in a predatory way, just a sexual way. There’s no way she’s human. I gotta ask her myself.
The author's tale has been misappropriated; report any instances of this story on Amazon.
“Hey, I’m right here. I’ve known her for like 8 years…then again, I knew Nicole for ten, and she turned out to be…not very human.”
“She single? Which one is she?”
“Taken, and that one over there.”
“Is that all part of the costume?”
“Nope, just the dress.”
“Yikes, I don’t even do hairy legs. That’s a full hairy…all of her. That’s a hard pass. What else you got?”
“Wh- You just want my friend list of bangable gals, and I’m just dogshit or what?”
“No, you’re way too short and too human.” he yawned.
“Oh, like you’re gonna break me because I’m some weak human?”
“Probably, but that’s beside the point. Look lady I know I’m rich and hot, I see your point, but it’s not happening. I'm hunting the real rare prizes."
“I live in the same house as Vicki, and she’s already cheating on Jack. How rich we talking?” Dee said, crossing her arms.
“Stupid rich. Not that I’m rich and stupid, it’s just stupid how rich I am. Same house and everything? So that Jack situation IS kinda flexible?”
“I’m pretty flexible.”
“Do I have to actually bang you or are you just using me to make your boyfriend jealous, would hanging out alone work? Like a rumor thing? Would that satisfy you?”
“You’re using me to get to Vicki?” she sighed with disappointment.
“You’re using me to get at your boyfriend.”
“Yea fair point, so you gonna buy me a drink.”
“Yea sure. What do you want?”
“I’ll have 2 of the whatever is the most expensive booze, bartender, sir. This guy’s paying for me."
“Bartender…within reason, like keep it under a grand for the whole night, and then cut her off.” He muttered. Dee’s eyes lit up like Christmas. She may have been in love, but with the other bulge in his pants. The one in his back pocket.
“So tell me a little about Vicki. What kinda guy is she cheating on Jack with?”
“Don’t tell anyone, can you keep a secret?”
“Not at all.”
“Good enough. I'm gonna tell you anyway. That Delmarian guy over there. She’s doing him and on the lookout for something new.
“Then how the hell did I get shot down? I had a perfectly fitting costume match by accident, dashing looks intentionally, I worked the charm. Is she an Alice?”
“No she doesn’t just go for the big bunnies, Jack’s human and I think Vinn was just available and a nice guy.”
“I did that nice guy vibe too, I was fucking adorable. What the hell?” he puzzled. "Is it a black thing?" he asked, giving her a stare.
“No...I really don't think so, I don’t get it either. She’s here looking for studs, rich one shows up and she passes. You got me on that logic. Maybe she's going for humans only. So what do you do for a living that pays so well?”
“Oh, I don’t do shit, I was born into money. I just spend it, and it kinda keeps growing back.” He said as an alarm went off and everyone half thought it was a rave siren and half a fire alarm.
“This is a bug detection warning system. Please proceed to exit in an orderly fashion and remain calm. Bug detection conformed within quarantined zone.” The alarm voice said, as everyone proceeded to panic in a non-orderly fashion.
“Shit, I gotta go. You coming?” Dee asked.
“Hell no, I’ve been waiting for this chance.” He said, drawing his sword.
“Is that a real sword?”she yelled.
“Well yea it’s a limited edition movie model, solid titanium, autographed and laser etched.”
“How did you get past security with a damn sword?”
“Money.” He said firmly, she shrugged and rolled her eyes. The room cleared out aside from about 10 people, including Dee, the new guy, and Vicki. 7 strangers kept drinking their drinks and giving zero shits.
“Why are you still here?” he asked.
“You seem like the guy who could protect me.” Dee noted.
“COULD or WOULD?” he asked.
“Seriously?” she blurted.
“I’m just kidding. Vicki would be super pissed if I just let you get murdered by bugs, that would screw up my whole angle. Why is she still here?”
“Probably because she expects Jack to run in and save her like he alw- and there’s Jack with a gun. Right on time.” She said as the 3 guys at the nearest table calmly drank their drinks. “Why are you guys so calm?”
“Man, these bugs aren’t even real. They’re just government control. Just like the microchips in the shots.” The closest one chuckled, about the same time as a large insect landed on his head and took a bite into his face.
“Well he’s dead.” Yawned the blade wielding stranger.
“So, I assume you’re some kind of absolute badass with a sword?” she asked.
“Not really. I’m a badass in general who HAS a sword, but my sword skills are mostly VR related. Never actually been in combat, this is gonna be fun.” He grinned.
“YYyyep. I should have evacuated with the others.” Dee sighed. She flinched as Jack opened fire with a suppressed SMG, making his way to the back to look for survivors, and Vicki specifically. She closed the door behind her, checking the room for an exit and realized it was a dead end and there were 2 bodies on the ground, with at least 8 bugs circling them.
“Shit.” She huffed. Ready to run as she noticed they were just staring at her. She bared her fangs and let out a vicious hiss, squatting down aggressively. The bugs scattered and made their way into the air duct. She checked the bodies, no pulse, no signs of life.
“Well…might as well.” She said, sinking her teeth into the neck of the first one and feeding.
Dee screamed as another burst of gunfire went past her and the glimmer of a sword swiped just uncomfortably close to her field of view.
The dark stranger slid in front of her, slightly grinning and holding a sword with green blood on it.
“Are you good?” he asked.
“I don’t even have a weapon!”
“Do you know medical stuff? Can you check to see if those assholes are dead assholes?”
“I don’t know.”
“Well…I guess they’re just boned.” He shrugged and took off, wildly swinging his sword.
The door knocked loudly, as Vicki jumped and realized she was thoroughly bloody and had feed mode eyes.
“Vicki?” hollered Jack.
“I’m in here…I’m safe, the room is clear.”
“The door’s locked.” he said, rattling it.
"It got jammed when I shut it, just go, help the others, I’m fine and safe.” She said trying to figure out her problem.
“I don’t wanna just leave you.”
“I’m not going anywhere, I’m safe, trust me.” She assured.
“Stay put, I’ll be back in 5 minutes.” He said as she started to panic. She waited for the silence of Jacks running to fade out, she opened the door and darted out towards the bathrooms to clean up. She nearly made it, before running into the dark stranger, now covered in green blood and a big goofy grin.
“Holy shit, you’re bleeding.” He said checking her.
“No, it’s…not my blood.” She assured, I’m going to clean it off.”
“You need someone to check the bathroom for bugs first, I’ll go with you.” He said, rushing ahead of her and kicking the door open unnecessarily. He circled back and motioned her. “All clear, I’ll guard the door.”
“Make sure nobody else comes in either.” she said frantically.
“I got it.” he assured, sword out. She quickly cleaned herself at the sink, trying to look halfway presentable before Jack saw her like that.
“So how did you get covered in human blood exactly?” he hollered back.
“Bugs got him, I was just standing close, and how did you know it was human?”
“I can smell the difference. Funny, the bugs don’t usually like, rip limbs off or anything, they just inject you with venom like a snake. Not usually a lot of blood spraying out. You uh, seem to have gotten it mostly on your face and hands, cleavage, lot around the mouth area. Care to detail that?” he asked.
“Hard to explain right now, I’m in shock and very confused.”
"You’re very clear-headed, seem more worried about cleaning up than getting killed. I’m just wondering if you aren’t up to something that would merit reporting.” He said. She stopped and yanked him into the bathroom, locking the door.
“Look, you can’t report me. I didn’t kill anyone.”
“I’m gonna need more than that to believe you. Seems like maybe you saw an opportunity in the mayhem and maybe took out someone, hoping the bugs would get the credit. Feel free to ease my doubt here.” he said skeptically.
“Okay, fine, just be cool.”
“I’m always cool, red.” He smirked.
"The guy was already dead, he sustained about 6 bites to the leg and had no pulse. I checked both arms. Dead"
“And then you…just decided what a perfect time to complete the costume and cover yourself in blood, or is this not a costume? Don’t take this weirdly, but, you don’t smell human. Well you do now you got human blood all over you but before that you didn’t smell human. You’re drinking human blood.”
“Some shit happened, and I’m a vampire.”
“Fuck-yes. I knew it. That is awesome. Can I see the fangs?” she rolled her eyes and opened her mouth.
“Oh nice. Those are legit.
“Jealous?” she asked oddly.
“No, mine are real too.” He said lowering and retracting his.
“Wait…there’s MORE of me? Vampires are just a thing?”
“Oh no, moon vampires is bullshit. I’m just an alien with fangs. I mostly suck tequila, but You’re just a legit moon vampire, hu?”
“You’re not freaked out by this? I’ve eaten human flesh.”
“Who hasn’t?” he shrugged. “Oh right, that's taboo…fuck, okay, I might have also eaten human flesh. Hey it’s not weird for me, I’m not human. Technically neither are you, I’m guessing. Not anymore.”
“So you’ve…killed people?”
“No, I just know the guy at the funeral home. I got curious. Took home a sample. It’s overrated as hell.”
“So you could get me fresh bodies then…”
“Uh, I guess I could. Can I get a favor out of it?” he asked.
“Oh my god, are you really gonna tell me I have to have sex with you, or you’ll report me or something?” she said, looking like she was about to cry.
“What? No, that’s a dick move even for me. I’m not saying shit. You’re cool. I was gonna say if I get you the hook-up for the trouble, maybe we could just hang out.”
“I know what hang out means to guys, especially guys trying to screw me.”
“You got me way wrong, lady. I mean yea I would hit that in a heartbeat, I would tear that up gladly, but I’m not gonna blackmail you for sex. Look, I don’t have many friends, I don’t know if you caught on to this, but I can be a bit…annoying. People don’t give me a chance, and in this entire lockdown I’ve been pretty much stuck by myself, and it’s driving me nuts. Bring friends, bring a gun, I don’t give a shit, I just wanna get out and do something and the clubs are a joke. Everyone there is with their quarantine groups and couples, and it’s all humans and furry people. I just kinda think if I go through the trouble to smuggle you some dead bodies, that maybe you could just let me hang out with you or your group. I’m so bored, and so wealthy, and I am losing my shit cooped up with nobody around. You’re the first interesting person I’ve talked to in a month.”
“Okay, fine, I have an idea. Just follow my lead.” She said as they exited the bathroom and ventured into the empty main area. She spotted Jack and waved at him, drawing him running to her aide.
“What happened, I said stay put.”
“Bugs got through the air vent. This guy saved me."
“I can’t thank you enough. Jack Greene.” He said, offering a handshake.
“Heard a lot about you already. I met your friend Dee earlier. Claybourne, just Claybourne. He shook.
“No last name?”
“Nah.” He shrugged oddly.
“Well, thank you for helping out. I owe you a debt.”
“Maybe we can invite him over for dinner or something.” Suggested Vicki.
“Yea, that sounds great. I make a mean pot-roast.” Jack smiled.
“Two of my favorite things.” He joked. “Here’s my cell. I’m free, just like, literally all the time. I have no life. None whatsoever.” He smiled.