A rather glum and dark day in Hell for Ralred, the Messenger of Hell and Satan. Being the Messenger of Hell was a tough job, though. Constantly having to go up to Earth and lurk, tempt some humans, report back to Hell, give notes to Satan about new potential sinners, start the cycle again. It's been getting really monotonous for him after a few thousand years.
"Ralred, Ralred?" Hell's loudspeaker sounded, the feedback squealed as the deep voice took over. "Ralred, report to Satan's office, now."
"...Again, typical." Ralred grumbled, standing up from his desk in one swift motion. He was absolutely tired of what He wanted. Absolutely fucking tired. This happened 24/7 at this point.
He made his way down the dark hallway with his hands clasped behind his back in an attempt to look professional. He reached RM. 666 and opened the door slowly, catching sight of the maroon, monstrous being sitting at his own desk. Ralred gulped and walked in meekly. Satan smiled at the little demon and snapped his fingers, causing the door to slam behind Ralred, startling him.
"Yes, boss? What'd you need?" The demon asked.
"Yes, hello again, my dearest Ralred," Satan paused for a moment, looking down at himself in the mirror. "Oh, sorry. I really need to stop lookin' like this, eh?" He raised his hand and snapped his fingers again, transforming him into a more.. Presentable 'person'. Slicked back ginger hair, a red glittery suit and brown eyeballs.
This tale has been pilfered from Royal Road. If found on Amazon, kindly file a report.
"Now, where were we again? Oh, right -" He opened the drawer and pulled out a piece of paper that had stuff written on it. "- Yer last report, yew've mentioned a church, yes? I believe this will be perfect grounds for temptation. I'll send up a few of our best demons as well with ye."
Oh, was this bloke really serious?
"Mm." Is the only thing Ralred could say as he nodded, and Satan chuckled.
"Great, tomorrow. 07:30. Yer goin' up to Earth. Thank ye for being our best employee."
Best employee? Judas-Bless-It.
"Yes, thanks for having me." The Messenger bowed, making Satan put his hand to his chest as a gesture of flattery. "Now, may I go now? I got lots to prepare for."
"Eager to get to work? I like it. Ye may leave now." Satan shoo'd Ralred away, the door opening with the gesture. Ralred turned to face the door before getting stopped by His voice.
"By the way, Ralred. There'll be a company outing next month. I'd like ye to come with us. Balam, Beelzebub, Furfur, Gaap, and Malphas is comin'."
Not those guys.
"Sounds like fun, boss." Ralred said curtly before exiting the room. He shut the door behind him and leaned against it for a while, collecting his thoughts. He knew tomorrow was going to be a rough day.