Dave hesitated, sensing the sarcastic bitterness in her tone. He grabbed the black bracelet on his hand and snapped it open, sliding it into a pocket.
"I'm sorry, Cedez," he began, speaking English, his voice filled with sincerity. "I didn't mean to hurt you or belittle your feelings. I was thoughtless and insensitive, and I hope you can find it in your heart to forgive me."
Cedez stared at him for a moment, her eyes evaluating his face. As the silence stretched on, Dave felt a knot of anxiety tighten in his stomach, wondering if his apology would be enough to bridge the gap that had formed between them.
"I hope that you realize that I don't need your rude hero ass," she replied in perfect English with a snarl, her eyes flashing with a mixture of anger and pride. "I'm perrrrrfectly fine on my own."
Dave felt the sharp sting of her words.
"I know you don't need me, Cedez," he replied earnestly, making sure to meet her gaze. "I'm not a hero; I'm just a programmer who died in a car accident and got dragged to this crazy place by a God-Emperor's isekai spell. I don't even know why I have a rare skill that allows me to resist your charisma."
As he spoke, Dave could see the silver flickers in Cedez's eyes, her expression softening ever so slightly. It seemed that his honesty had struck a chord with her, and he felt a flicker of hope that their relationship could still be salvaged.
"I never asked for any of this," Dave continued, his voice tinged with vulnerability. "I'm just trying to navigate this mad world of gods and men with far too much power and make the best decisions I can. I know I didn’t let you speak, and I'm sorry that I hurt you in the process. When I yelled at you, my skill caused a negative feedback loop, messing up my emotions, but that's still no excuse for me snapping at you."
"Uh-huh," her dark tail swished, acknowledging Dave's words but still maintaining a guarded demeanor.
"Can we talk?" he asked, hoping to rebuild their connection.
"We can," she said, crossing her arms, but her tone indicated a willingness to listen.
"How much of you is Cedez, and how much is Nox?" Dave ventured, genuinely curious about the duality of her existence.
Cedez blinked, seemingly caught off guard by the question.
After a moment, she finally replied, "Mmmmm, half and half, I suppose. Sometimes I'm more regal, bossy and dominating, and other times I just want to be a nobody, to blend in, to be able to touch someone without melting them into a twitching puddle with my excessive charisma."
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"That sounds pretty difficult," Dave sympathized. "So, do you want to be the Sovereign of Shandria?"
"You think that I have a choice?" Cedez raised a dark eyebrow, her frustration evident.
"I don't know how it works," Dave admitted, seeking to understand her predicament better.
"I don't either," she shrugged. "When I'm her Shadow, I can hear people's prayers and dreams... But I am also exceptionally weak in comparison when I wake up. I try to make as many people smile as possible with my charisma, but it's just not enough. The painful truth is that you’re right. For a goddess of this domain I’m exceptionally useless…”
Sparks of tears formed at the corners of her eyes once more.
"How long have you been her Shadow?" Dave inquired, hoping to gain more insight into her unique situation.
"I've always had unnaturally high charisma, had dreams about my conquests that happened centuries ago, flashes of self-recognition... but lately, they've gotten worse. In the last two years, I found myself melting away at night into the shadows, becoming one with the cloud. It's all quite unnerving, sort of like puberty but much worse. I’ve been gradually changing and not necessarily for the better."
Dave listened intently, his heart aching for Cedez as he began to grasp the complexity of her life. It was clear that she was struggling with her dual nature, and he felt a strong desire to help her find a way to reconcile her conflicting identities.
"What do you think will happen to you?" Dave asked, his voice gentle and concerned.
"I don't know," she admitted, her eyes reflecting her uncertainty. "I'm not the first."
"You're not?"
"Nu-huh," Cedez shook her dark mane, her expression growing somber. "Twenty years ago, there was another Sovereign. Her name was Natalie Oppaz. She called herself Nilix Astrix when she rose to power.”
"What happened to her?"
"She... I... I don't know exactly," Cedez sighed, her voice heavy with the weight of unspoken fears. "I think that the ward provides some sense of continuity, because I got some of her memories, but they’re very fuzzy. She helped Steve Chadwick gain power, and then she died when he left. A necromancer killed her, along with every noble that supported her ascension to Sovereign of Shandria."
"A conspiracy?" Dave guessed.
"Most likely," Cedez nodded, her eyes darkening with the memory. "It's the reason why I haven't been making waves this time around. I'm afraid, Dave. I don't want to die. Technically, I'll be reborn again as some other girl in some other family, but I'm me, you know. I'm Cedez. I..."
Her voice faltered, and Dave saw more tears welling up in her eyes. He felt a surge of empathy and protectiveness wash over him, a deep-rooted desire to help her navigate the treacherous path that lay before her.
“I feel like I’m trapped in some loop of perpetuity, a great grinding gear of inevitability that will crush me in the future no matter what I do,” she exhaled. “I’ve talked to the seer my parents hired when I was born…”
“And?” Dave asked.
“It’s not good,” Cedez shook her dark mane. “She said that I am to meet my death at the hand of a necromancer in my greatest hour when my silver stars outshine all others.”
"I'll protect you," Dave said firmly, his resolve unwavering. "I'll be by your side if you let me. If you ask me, vague-ass prophecies like that are bullshit.”
"You and what army?" she asked. "You're not even a necromancer. You're not even a real noble. You’re going to lose Rimzadria Estate in three months and you’ll be a nobody once again."