"Welcome, Alex Hartman. Let’s get started."
The words on the phone’s screen glowed faintly, throwing an eerie light across Alex’s room. He stared at them, a thousand questions racing through his mind. His body still tingled faintly from the strange lightheadedness that had overtaken him earlier. Everything felt sharper, clearer—like his mind and senses had been fine-tuned overnight.
But in reality, it was just because he was 18 again and healthy.
But none of it made sense. He had woken up in 2010, years younger, in his childhood room, with a bizarre app claiming he was now part of some mysterious project. And for what? To build a business? To achieve “greatness”?
A new line of text appeared on the screen:
“The Tycoon Project: Your role is to build and sustain a thriving business empire. Success metrics will be monitored. Resources provided. Rewards commensurate with performance.”
Alex narrowed his eyes. “This is some SCP shit if I've ever seen one, What kind of rewards?”
The phone hesitated for a moment before displaying:
“Successful completion of objectives unlocks incremental control over project parameters, personal autonomy, and optional resource withdrawal.”
Personal autonomy. The phrase set off alarm bells in Alex’s head. “And if I fail?”
The screen flickered before responding:
“Failure metrics vary. Consequences range from loss of resources to permanent exclusion from Project privileges.”
Alex frowned. The vague, clinical phrasing only deepened his suspicion. This wasn’t some benevolent opportunity—it was a test. A trap he had already fallen into!
“Alright, fine,” he muttered. “Let’s say I play along. What’s stopping me from just… failing immediately?”
For a moment, the screen stayed blank, and Alex thought he’d stumped it. Then a line of text appeared:
“Involuntary termination of Project status is irreversible. Consequences cannot be disclosed prior to initiation.”
“Of course not,” Alex muttered.
It was becoming clear to him: this wasn’t a game where failure was a free option. There were stakes—serious ones. But what if… what if winning was worse? What if the system wasn’t testing him to see if he could succeed, but rather how far he’d go?
The next screen appeared, snapping him out of his thoughts:
“Initial resources generated: $1,000 starting capital, a commercial property deed, and partner selection.”
Below it, a map appeared, pinpointing the location of his new business: a run-down storefront in a semi-decent area. The screen showed a picture of the building.
“Fantastic,” Alex muttered. “Looks like a foreclosure waiting to happen.”
The final prompt caught his attention: “Choose a partner to manage operations.”
A list of names and faces began scrolling on the screen, each accompanied by a short bio. Alex’s eyes skimmed the entries—some were decent, some mediocre, but all came with an ominously vague “Potential Contribution Score.”
Then this thought struck him.
If the system wanted him to succeed, then every candidate on this list would, in theory, have some redeeming qualities. But what if Alex’s goal wasn’t to succeed? What if his best shot was to exploit the system’s desire for control by creating as much chaos as possible?
If he could turn his "success" into something absurd, maybe the system would reveal its true intentions.
A slow grin spread across his face. I’ll give you a tycoon, alright. Let’s see how far we can push this.
Alex thought he was grinning like the Grinch.
That’s when he spotted the options
Recommendations
Amanda Carlisle
Age: 28
Bio: A marketing graduate with three years of experience in a mid-tier advertising firm. Amanda’s biggest achievement was spearheading a social media campaign that went semi-viral, increasing her previous employer's brand engagement by 15%. Currently freelancing after being laid off due to company downsizing. Depressed enough to work for a 18 year old nobody :)
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Strengths:
* Highly organized and deadline oriented.
* Strong communication skills and some experience in branding.
* A modest but proven track record of business acumen.
Weaknesses:
* Overly cautious, struggles with creativity under pressure.
* Known to micromanage tasks, which could stifle team dynamics.
* Complicated relationship with her mother.
Potential Contribution Score: 68%
Kenneth “Kenny” Ramirez
Age: 35
Bio: A former truck driver with a knack for logistics. Kenny has never managed a business before, but he’s good with numbers and has been praised for his problem-solving skills in high-pressure situations. Recently unemployed after an accident left him unable to drive.
Strengths:
* Exceptional at logistics, scheduling, and cost-cutting measures.
* Dependable, honest, and stubborn.
* His low class birth allows for a great perspective to the poorest of your possible customers.
Weaknesses:
* No business management experience.
* Foul mouth and struggles with customer-facing tasks.
* Has a baby mamma.
Potential Contribution Score: 59%
Marcus Billings
Age: 42
Bio: A retired accountant who left his career early to “live off the land.” Marcus has been running a modest organic farming business but is looking for new opportunities to “reconnect with the modern world.” His expertise lies in finances and budgets.
Strengths:
* Financially savvy with decades of experience in managing money.
* Patient and methodical, making him reliable for long-term strategies.
* Nick Offerman levels of manly and sexy.
Weaknesses:
* Out of touch with modern technology and trends.
* Overly frugal, sometimes to the detriment of growth opportunities.
* Will not follow orders if he disagrees with them.
Potential Contribution Score: 72%
As Alex scrolled through the “Recommendations list” pausing at each description in bafflement… mommy issues and depressed? Low class birth? Alex stared extra hard at the hot pink letters with little hearts floating around the text.
“This is super suspicious” Alex muttered, “And why is the system talking like that?”
Amanda and Marcus seemed like obvious choices if he were taking this seriously. Amanda had enough experience to manage day-to-day operations, but she seems to be in a dark place, and it would be wrong to take advantage of her. While Marcus’s financial acumen could keep the business solvent, Alex really didn’t like how the system was presenting Marcus.
Alex squinted his eyes and thought This feels like a classic Hobson’s choice. When you are given multiple options but only one real option. Kenny is an instant no for now at least.
Alex needed someone who could help bring chaos and not be a system pawn.
He looked around his dirty room for a possible idea. Then his eyes focused in on the new graduation yearbook that has (most likely) been thrown on his desk right after coming home after book signing.
Alex hopped over all the dirty clothes and random nicknacks on the floor to his desk. “Perfect! This should refresh my memory.” He cracked it open not recognizing many faces, till he saw his own picture. In the middle of the book after last names ending with M, the pages turned to club pictures, and in the background of some of the pictures was the school mascot doing goofy things. After a few more pages a whole page was the Cheer team with the mascot lined up with them and its head off showing a young man standing about 5’9 with a mop of messy long-Ish brown hair and dark eyes with an off-kilter grin.
Under each person in the lineup was a name and under the mascot was Brian T.
Alex had a feeling he had promise, he looked for more mentions of B.T. The next mention of him was in the student voting section. The image was Brian in really baggy jeans with a tie used as a belt, and a Hawaiian shirt with a clearly disheveled backpack over one shoulder covered in patches all on his lankly frame. From what Alex saw Brian’s appearance was giving a chaotic, whimsical, and utterly unbothered by the opinions of others vibe. He pulled off his look very well. He was holding a bored saying “Least Likely to Succeed” mid-laugh next to a Black girl in a clean and professional-looking suit jacket and pants holding a bored saying “Most Likely to Succeed” trying to look serious but clearly failing to keep a professional look next to Brian.
The more Alex saw the better Brian looked! (for his plans of course) After the group pictures, it went back to head shots of all the students. Alex combed through the pages till he saw the last names starting with T, then he went name by name. When he landed on Brian Thompson, he looked up to the photo to see a picture of Brian in a powdered wig and a Victorian fan that was clearly made minutes before the picture.
Alex looked back at his phone and said “Show me, Brian Thompson”
The phone only delayed for a second as if it was processing the request thinking if it would listen but after a few seconds, Brian’s Profile appeared.
After reading all of Brian’s Profile Alex couldn’t stop grinning.
Brian was perfect: an unreliable, overconfident, barely employable disaster. If anyone could turn a fledgling business into a flaming wreck, it was Brian. And better yet, the system wouldn’t stop him from picking Brian—it was his choice.
“Let’s see how badly we can break this system” Alex muttered, selecting Brian’s profile.
Brian Thompson
Age: 18
Bio: Brian just graduated high school, while in high school Brian was the school mascot, known as the guy who managed to burn ramen in the Home Econ microwave. Famously bombed a presentation in Economics class by confusing “profit” with “prophet.” Voted “Least Likely to Succeed” in the senior yearbook. He is currently at a shaman having his bones read to see what college he should go to.
Strengths:
* Can convince anyone that his latest wacky idea is “the next big thing.”
* Has a unique ability to make things more complicated than they need to be.
Weaknesses:
* Zero practical skills.
* Lives in a constant state of “almost starting something”—he never quite follows through.
* Can't focus on anything for more than five minutes without getting distracted by something shiny.
Potential Contribution Score: 18%