Mush, Jim thought. A growing humanoid mass of garbage that smelled…

Not too bad, actually. Sometimes trollish senses and appetites were a good thing.

“Mush, stand down!” Carlos ordered.

“Fuck you! You’re not taking our stash!”

How tough is he? Jim frantically tried to remember the briefing. Had Mush ever been in a major fight? Armored or not, if he was a normal human under there, hitting him too hard could kill him.

Behind Mush a bunch of men came out, some with baseball bats, others holding bundles of some kind. One was screaming into a phone.

Most of them seemed to be running, but some were joining up with Mush.

“Aegis! What is going on!” Someone else was talking on Console.

“We’ve encountered Merchant’s. Mush and some unpowered thugs.”

“Armsmaster, Assault, and Battery are en route. Do not eng—”

“Too late!” Carlos shouted as Mush charged. Jim leaped forward, covering the other two, and impacted Mush in the alley. The sheer mass of the cape pushed Jim out onto the street, and he heard horns and shouts. Mush punched Jim in the face, once, twice, three times, and then Jim lost his temper. He flexed his legs and spun the other cape around, tossing him across the street. Then he turned and growled at Mush’s allies, who evidently discovered the better part of valor and joined their fleeing companions.

Mush rolled to his feet and turned to run down the road, bowling over the odd passerby who had been attracted by the commotion.

“C’mon!” Jim said. “We can’t let him get away.”

“He’s made of garbage. I’ve got an idea,” Claire said. “But we have to get in front of him.”

“Right,” Carlos said. “I’ll keep him under observation. What’s your plan?”

“A shower,” Claire said.

“The fuck?” Sophia asked.

“We’ll explain later, Claire, do it!” Moments later, Claire opened a portal and Jim charged through with Sophia and Claire right after him. Jim didn’t pause, slamming into Mush. He was big, but not nearly as strong as Gunmar.

Not nearly as skilled, either. Gunmar would have tried to kill them all in the alley, where Claire and Carlos’s mobility advantage was neutralized. He wouldn’t have wasted time talking, not until he had the advantage.

Jim figured Mush was no Gunmar the Black.

“Why the fuck aren’t you letting me go!” Mush shouted, the hint of a whine in his voice as he struggled to pull away.

“My girlfriend thinks you stink,” Jim said. “Claire?”

Claire nodded, closed her eyes, and moments later, right above Jim and Mush, a portal opened, bright against the cloudy sky. And from it…

Water. Seawater. Cold and coming with the same force as a firehose. Mush shrieked at the cold water, and Jim held his breath and gritted his teeth as it flowed over the cape, ripping garbage from his shrinking body. A few moments later and Claire turned off Niagra falls, leaving Jim to hold a potbellied man with tendrils slowly retreating into his body. Claire gave Jim a thumbs up, even though she was panting from exertion.

If you discover this tale on Amazon, be aware that it has been unlawfully taken from Royal Road. Please report it.

“You… You gave me a shower! You fucker! It’s all gone!” He screamed.

Sophia aimed her crossbow at Mush.

“Stalker,” Jim said. “You shouldn’t—”

“Look out!” Carlos shouted. Jim’s head snapped around, and there were two roostertails of water heading for Claire and Sophia, only where the hell was the truck—And then Aegis moved, pushing Claire out of the way, as Sophia turned to shadow… And Carlos was struck by whatever it was, flying across the road through a window. Jim barely had time to throw Mush out of its path before it hit him.

It hit hard. Not as hard as Gunmar, but Jim was flung back—and there was an acid smell and shiver, and suddenly there was… A thing in the road.

It looked like a car had crashed into an old tank factory and they’d glued the remains together.

“Get the fuck on, Mush!” A man shouted.

No, Jim thought. They weren’t going to take Mush, and they had tried to kill Claire. They might have killed Aegis. He growled and rolled to his feet, Eclipse manifesting in his hand. “One warning. Stand down.”

“Fuck you! You pussy wards should fucking stay out of my way!”

Skidmark. Of course. Jim had a depressing thought that the E88 or ABB would just have written off the drugs and Mush.

Not Skidmark.

Jim moved, charging the vehicle. The next thing he knew, he was being punched back by something that was firing what looked like compressed chunks of trash.

They can’t even afford guns? Carlos came rocketing out of the store, one arm limp. Bolts of purple struck the vehicle. Claire. Skidmark turned the gun on her, but before he could fire, there was a portal in front of her that ate the cannon fire…

And another portal opened up, the projectiles flying from it to strike the vehicle, causing more sparks to fly from it as the vehicle shuddered under its own friendly fire. A female shriek of rage sounded.

Mush had rolled over onto his belly and was crawling to the vehicle, but Jim didn’t have eyes for him. He moved, dodging left, then right, and was up by the vehicle. Eclipse dug into the armor of the car, and then there was a gap Jim could get his hands in. He pulled as hard as he could, and there was the sound of failing metal as an entire chunk of armor came lose.

“Shit! Fuck!” Skidmark was doing something with his hands, and then Jim felt himself falling forward. He grabbed the metal, but he was out of position as the vehicle lurched into motion and found himself sliding, and then he got a face full of building as the driver tried to scrape him off. Jim roared in fury and let go before he started running towards the vehicle. He could see the equipment in it, and once he got his hands on it…

“Fuck it!” Skidmark said. “You’re on your own Mush!” Skidmark stared at Jim in fury and tried to fire the cannon again, but it seemed to be damaged, the chunks of compressed trash coming slower. Jim manifested his shield and blocked them, while a portal opened by the truck, and Claire appeared, gesturing with her hands as chains of purple energy gripped the gun, pulling its barrel down. More chains were holding the vehicle itself to the ground, the tires spinning frantically.

“That’s enough out of you!” she said.

Skidmark got up and tried to turn the turret towards Claire, but when he stood up to get a better shot out of her, Carlos swept down and hit him from the rear, knocking him up and over the vehicle, onto the ground.

“I’m going to—” he looked down at where a crossbow bolt had sprouted from his chest. “Squealer, give me a ha—” He toppled over.

The next thing Jim knew, there was a tremendous blast of light and noise that set every car alarm on the street off. He was flung back, and Claire fell on her ass, and Squealer’s car was vanishing into the distance.

Both literally and figuratively. Jim guessed she got her cloak working again.

“So, um…” Claire looked around. “Do you think we can say nothing happened?”

Coming down off of his combat high, Jim stared at the street. Parts of it were still covered in water, a few fish flopping around. Claire stared at them and opened some smaller portals, for them to fall through and drop back into the ocean. Down the street, a tide of water was making its own way back to the bay, in some places a foot or two deep.

Mush needed a big shower.

There were cars with smashed windows, cars that had been knocked on their side, one car that was still following the deluge down the slope… As Jim watched, it drifted into an intersection… Just in time for a garbage truck to go through the intersection, the driver trying to brake, too late. The truck hit the car in a spray of seawater, and then there was the crunching sound of impact, joined by the forlorn wail of the car alarm.

Jim winced. What was it they said? Don’t get into a fight and show the flag. Oh, Boy.

“We’re in trouble,” Jim muttered.

“I’m in trouble,” Carlos said.

“Fuck that, we just took out two of the Merchant Capes!” Sophia said, one foot on Mush’s back, pushing the coughing man’s nose into the wet asphalt.

And it was then that Armsmaster, followed by Assault, Battery, and what seemed to be every car in the BBPD came roaring around the corner.