An expansive blue sky welcomed Jule once he opened his eyes, the puffy clouds in the sky moving ever so slowly. The now warmer afternoon breeze touching the various sore spots in his body, making them sting.

“Well…” The voice of a man enters Jule’s ear, ruining the whole peaceful atmosphere for him.

“I guess you can now hold your own against rank 3 body refiners, maybe even defend a blow against a rank 4 body enhancer…” As he says this, Parn reaches down and pulls Jule up, making sure that he grasps a specially sore spot in Jule’s arm.

“Though we need to work on you getting distracted in the middle of battle, it is quite bad to lose yourself from every little thing” He grins and pats Jule’s back, barely holding back his strength.

This son of a bitch…

Parn Wilton, a baron and one of the best knights under Jule’s father. He is a peak rank 4 body enhancer, an unbelievable achievement for someone his age.

The reason he had such a standing in ArchDuke Redshield’s army was not because of his body enhancement rank though, he was also a rank 2 mind refiner, giving him an unbelievable control over his body and senses. In combat he could beat most other rank 4 body refiners and even take down some low rank 5 ones.

Most body refiners found it increasingly difficult to raise mind refining ranks the further they got into their cultivation and vice versa. It was when they got into the fourth rank and became enhancers that it became outright impossible-

Each path had a specific method when advancing enhancing ranks that made training the opposite path a waste of time.

While body refiners were rather common, the same could not be said for mind refiners. For every 1,000 body refiners, a mind refiner would arise, which meant that those few body refiners that cultivated mind refining would have a constant advantage for the rest of their lives.

Jule was somewhat resentful, Parn should have complete control over his body, yet every single time he touched Jule, Jule felt as if he was hit by a boulder.

After Jule left The Academy, his father got Parn to continue his swordsmanship training. Though calling it training would be an insult to all sword trainers in the world. Parn’s classes consisted of beating Jule up until he could no longer stand.

Thanks to this, Jule had been accumulating quite a bit of pent up frustration, and having no release, yet, he had become a lot more irritable. Just last week, a servant broke a vase near him and he almost beat her up to a pulp.

The worst part of it all though, was his rotten personality. He constantly smirked and probed Jule, as if enjoying his reactions.

It was very humiliating...

Yet Jule could do nothing, the man’s reputation amongst the soldiers was rock solid and he was the most trusted advisor of his own father. Until Jule himself became the ArchDuke there was not much he could do.

“Well...that’s it for today, go take a shower, you stink” Parn snickered and waved Jule off, himself walking away, arms folded behind his neck.

This subhuman piece of filth really knows how to get under my skin...Jule thought,clicking his tongue in disgust and turning around.

For Jule, it was a simple matter to get rid of such pests, pin a simple crime on them and no one would bat an eye when you execute them and their entire families. Yet it would become a little more complicated for a Head Knight…

One day though…

As Jule planned ways to rid himself of Parn’s existence, he limped away from his personal training yard. His breathing was extremely labored and he could barely keep consciousness, sometimes seeing shades of black and white in the corners of his eyes.

It took a while but he finally reached his favorite spot in the whole castle, a personal hot spring, only usable by the Duke and his family, which was only Jule. The entrance of said hot spring was hidden behind a few gardens in the back of the castle, a small bamboo building covering the entrance.

It was an open air bath, only a single pool, but it was more than enough for Jule’s needs.

The bath was surrounded by stones and had a few trees covering the top,giving some shade. While it was completely separated from the rest of the castle, the steam rising from the water made the sky look watery.

Apparently in the past, his father had hired a rank 5 mind enhancer to make this spring. His father went on so many battles back in those days that waiting for his body to heal naturally was extremely inefficient.

His father no longer used it, so it was Jule’s personal bath now.

As he dunked his body in the naturally steaming water, he could feel all the wounds in his body itch for a few seconds before closing up. Even his mind felt more at peace, his earlier thoughts now replaced by warmer memories.

Jule closed his eyes for a few minutes, letting his body soak all the elements in the water. Just by staying in the water, his body naturally absorbed ma from the environment, although not as efficient as Body Cultivation, it was quite an achievement.

This whole spring was the work of a true master, Jule could feel the elements flowing throughout the whole bath, masterfully weaved together to make all the effects in the bath possible.

As he meditated for a while, Jule could even feel his understanding of the elements and their flow rise a little. Although he was a body refiner, just like Parn, Jule had cultivated mind refining, giving him a modest amount of na stores.

Maybe in the future he could even make his own scrolls, he only learned the basics at The Academy after all.

Even if scrolls made by mind enhancers were a thousand times better, being able to make your own scrolls was an advantage no one would refuse.

Jule spent the next few hours resting on the bath, falling asleep a few times. It was only a shame that the maker of this bath, while very skilled in the art of inscribing, had a very minimalist sense of style. The bath didn’t really fulfill Jule’s aesthetic preferences, a bit too simple for his liking.

That said, Jule still liked the place a lot.

Regrettably, he couldn’t spend the whole night just slipping in and out of sleep in the warm bath, the favorite part of his daily routine had just arrived.

….

*Kock, Kock*

Ethan Redshield was distracted from his writing, he had just finished penning some permits for a local merchant and was about to continue with the rest of the massive pile stacked in front of his desk.

“Come in…”

The intricate mahogany entrance to his studio was opened, revealing a child behind the thick wooden frame. The child sauntered into the studio, stoping a few steps before Ethan’s desk.

“Father, I’ve come to help you with paperwork” The child bowed and took some of the papers stacked in front of Ethan, walking to a small desk neatly placed in the corner of the room.

Ethan’s desk was much bigger, occupying nearly half the width of the room. Behind his desk was a set of crystal windows, completely covered in drapes.

The only illumination in the rooms was the flames of various candlesticks on the walls, changed everyday by some servants.

Maps with various markings covered the walls and many more documents were strewn about. It was a mess, but a controlled mess, as Ethan knew where everything was…

Probably…

Ethan stopped writing, with his son in the room, he could no longer seem to focus. Although it was part of a daily routine, this hour always seemed to be his most unproductive.

His hands occasionally trembled, a sign that his body was not what it used to be, but perhaps the fact that it only happened when his son was around was a clearer sign.

He watched his son analyzing documents one by one and filling out various forms, his face shrouded in complete seriousness.

Ethan wanted to do many things at the same time.

He wanted to thank his child for helping him, he wanted to tell him that he could be less formal with him…

He also wanted to tell him that he loved him.

Ethan clenched his hands, his knuckles turning white. He tried many times to talk but his words were stuck in his throat, never able to escape. It was a hell of his own making.

Above all, he wanted to tell his child that he was sorry.

So…

So very sorry…

Ethan was never a very emotional man.The Redshield family was a rather conservative family, rules existed and they were meant to be upheld, emotions having no part in the equation.

In his childhood, he never saw his mother and father kiss, much less hear them say that they loved the other. It was a marriage without much love, only together thanks to the bond their children gave them.

Ethan never ate at the same table as his parents, having to eat alone with his brothers in the pantry. He was also not allowed to speak when in front of adults, told not to involve himself in matters above his level.

There was a brief time in his childhood when he gained a rebellious streak, often trying to get up to mischief with his brothers.

Eventually though, one of his brothers was caught in the act, he had set off some rats in the stables, scaring the horses and causing one to break its leg. The next time Ethan saw his brother, he had a dead look on his face, bloody lines covering his entire back, courtesy of their own father.

His brother then fell into a 7-day fever, causing him to lose his hearing.

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Even though their mother appeared outraged, she could not do much, they all knew their father was an outright bastard, yet he was never a man who would do something without a cause.

When he discovered that his wife was barren after three births, instead of replacing her, he kept his loyalty to her, trying his best to provide for the whole family every day. Back in those days, the Redshield family was but a simple baron house.

It had joined the War of Independence just as it was closing off, partaking in the rewards while putting in none of the effort. Rising from a simple mercenary group into part of the peerage.

The stigma was not gone through, and his father had to work like a madman everyday simply to keep their family afloat, very few true blooded nobles recognizing their rank.

All of this caused Ethan to grow up with a very detached personality, which in hindsight, was probably a reason for his success.

While his brothers fell into obscurity and eventually died from a myriad of reasons. He took charge of the Redshield Barony and made it thrive.

He never learned empathy or how to truly care for others, he could betray, murder and destroy with absolutely no remorse.

It was a great time to be a part of his group and a nightmare to be his enemy.

In the midst of this spiral, he was forced to marry a foreign woman, it was but a political marriage, nothing more and nothing less. In the then unstable border of Grandia and Dresden, stood a tiny city state, clamoring their independence.

It took them the razing of a few villages to get the point. Now, they were rushing in order to be accepted into one of the two factions. Ethan saw an opportunity, the daughter of the Royal Family was single, and he took it.

His plan was simple, take the woman, annex the land, make a few heirs and send her away.

...

Things don’t always go as one wants…

She was like a bunny... frail, cute and extremely kind. It confused Ethan to no end. One day he enjoyed his company and the other he wanted to absolutely destroy her, even he himself couldn’t understand how he thought.

Every time he returned from an arduous battle, she would always hug him and slowly clean his wounds. The first few times he refused and pushed her away, yet after the sixth time, he simply just let her be, amazed at her sheer stubbornness.

While he always showed her indifference, never caring for her opinion or even herself, she would show him warmth and understanding. There was never a thing he could do where she would renounce him, always accepting him as he was.

it drove Ethan insane, while he pushed her away, she fought to stay at his side, when he was tired from battle, her arms would become what he was looking for the most.

He couldn’t stop thinking about her, when training,when fighting, when eating, his mind was filled with only her.

He became enraged.

How could he be bewitched by a woman, how could he let himself be manipulated by her wiles.

One night, he finished his daily training, took a bath and went to sleep, only to find her already in bed, her chest slowly rising and lowering, her face scrunched in a cute expression.

Ethan immediately felt his chest turned warmer and his problems fading away. But he could not understand this feeling, he had never been taught what this meant, and he was scared of it.

He grabbed the sword he went to sleep with for safety and put it against the white neck of the sleeping woman, only one slice and all his problems would go away, he had done it hundreds of times, thousands of times.

She opened her eyes, blue like the sky.

Before Ethan could even realize it, his sword had long been replaced by his own head, he was like a dog searching for a treat. The smell of sunflowers coming off the woman nearly intoxicating him.

She smiled, her dimples adding to her beauty, and wrapped her arms around his head, pulling it close to her chest, her red lips placing a kiss on his cheek.

“Thank you for your work my love, come rest”.

Ethan broke down, it was quite a funny sight. A bulking man, completely covered in muscles was bawling like a baby, tears flowing endlessly from his face, his body in a fetal position.

“Why do you...even when I...Why?” Ethan could not even form coherent sentences, his sobbing not stopping for a single second. He was releasing dozens of years of frustrations and pains.

“Because, I promised you...when we got married...I promised that I would love you until death do us part…” The woman giggled and pinched Ethan’s cheek as if punishing him for making a stupid question.

Ethan didn’t stop crying until dawn came…

From that day onwards, his home was not a castle or a house, it was in her arms. He was like a thirsty man finding water, everything he lacked, she gave him.

She became his moral compass, she became his motivation, she became the only place where he belonged.

She was Ethan Redshield’s first and only wife, Amalia Redshield.

...

“Father…” Jule broke the silence, interrupting Ethan’s reminiscence. Ethan turned his eyes towards his son, they had long turned red due to his body enhancement method, giving him a slightly draconic look.

“Today...Parn told me I could hold my own against rank 3 body refiners…” Jule told his father, stuttering a bit after gaining his complete attention.

“Is that so…” Ethan answered, not able to think of a better thing to day, even with his wife, he was not the most articulate man.

Still, he probably could have answered better and he started beating himself over it. He had gone to war thousands of times, but for some reason, this was harder than all of them.

“Ye...Yeah” His son muttered, no longer able to keep direct eye contact with Ethan. Jule continued writing after a while of uncomfortable silence passed.

Ethan was not a dull man, even though his body had decayed over the years, courtesy of his endless warring and many wounds, his senses were still some of the best in the Kingdom, mixing the most outstanding aspects of a body and mind refiner.

He could see the occasional fidgeting of his son, as he sometimes twirled a pen in nervousness.

He could even notice the second long glances his son sometimes directed at him, his eyes turning glassy before focusing on the mounds of paper in front of his small desk.

Ethan bit his lip, drawing a bit of blood, which he hurriedly hid with his hand. His eyes focused on his son and he used his other hand to grip his hair nearly pulling off some strands.

It was truly vexing…

Although he said that he would quickly have heirs with Amalia, it took him years before he actually went ahead with it. Thankfully his lust had not gotten the better of him beforehand and his first time with Amalia was full of warmth.

It took a few times before his only son was born, a creature made out of the pure love his parents held for each other and especially for him.

Amalia was always bordering on sickly, she didn’t have the best constitution in the world, which meant that she probably suffered a lot of pain during her pregnancy, she never did tell Ethan though, always keeping it to herself. Still Ethan must have bought her thousands of scrolls, trying to ease her burden, showering her with all he could, even stopping his endless quest for conquest to be with her.

When that child was born, Ethan’s life changed, he was but a small baby and yet he probably held more love than any other person in the universe. He promised himself and Amalia that he would never let this child grow up as he did, he would give this child a loving family.

He would give him all he never had.

For a few months, Ethan’s world was them, he never returned to the battlefield, spending every waking moment enjoying life with his son and wife. Ethan’s cold heart had long melted away, he even doubted that a single human could be this happy.

They would often go out on picnics to the forest, her wife always picking a beautiful white linen dress, her beauty amazed Ethan every day more than the last.

His Dukedom thrived thanks to his past conquest. Having made peace with his past and expunged all his resentment, his cultivation was advancing at a breakneck speed and having a loving wife and son only completed his perfect life.

The only conflict present in his life was the occasional trouble with the Zanyan border and the political games, yet with the birth of his son, he ran away from politics as fast as he could.

...

The good times were not bound to last…

Giving birth had clearly been too much for Amalia’s body, and a year after Jule’s birth, she died.

Her funeral was somber...dark.

Amalia’s most hated color was present in everything Ethan saw, from the casket, to the clothes to the sky.

It was all dark…

And so was his heart, he had lost his anchor, his home, his future and his will. He learned a lesson, loving was harder than hating and much more painful.

Ethan returned to the battlefield, finding no point in a life without Amalia, if she was gone, there was no reason for him to enjoy life. Without the sun there would be no warmth, and Amalia was Ethan’s sun.

He fought,killed, plundered, burned...all to fill the gaping hole inside of him.

He gained even more land than before, and became feared all throughout the Kingdom. No noble dared to stand up to him, for all would die at his sword. He even took the fight to the Grandia border, pushing back the line for the first time in years.

Before he noticed, years had passed...and he felt as empty as he started.

It all changed when a child arrived with a Royal Order at his staging camp. The order was from the King, he was to mentor the child in the arts of war and battle. He didn’t know why the court was so insistent on him teaching a kid from a no name Viscount family, but he had stopped caring about things a long time ago.

He taught this child, at first rather half heartedly, it was quite funny to see the feared Shield of Dresden swinging a sword with a child in his teenage years. Ethan would often even give him impossible tasks just for the hell of it, taking his frustration out on the boy.

Yet the boy never refused, or complained, he simply did it. Worst of all, the child was a monster at learning, it wasn’t long before Ethan had to study in his personal time just to teach the kid something new.

In a way, the kid reminded Ethan of Amalia.

He started taking more time teaching his lessons, planning them out, making sure that he would learn the best of what he knew. The child absorbed all this like a sponge, taking everything from Ethan.

Even if he didn’t want to, Ethan grew close to this child.

They would often discuss their political ideas and plans over food, spend countless hours refining their swordsmanship and conquer lands together.

When he finished his training, the boy had become a man, he was respected among his army as a soldier and a commander. Mature, wise and very smart, he was all a man could wish for in a son.

Ethan sometimes even wished that he was his actual son. Everything would be much easier that way.

...

Yet this child would never be Amalia’s son.

He sent the child back to the castle after his training was finished, fearful of becoming even more attached to him. Ethan’s body was on the brink of breaking down, the constant abuse of the battlefield forcing him to push it time and time again.

He promised to spend whatever time he had left, giving Amalia’s son what Amalia had given him.

Yet…

It was easy to say things, but actions spoke louder than words.

For many, many years, he had ignored his child, forcing him to mature on his own. He had refused to attend the responsibility he had towards this child, taking him for granted, as if he was just a toy to push away when bored.

He had neglected his child for far too long, and perhaps it was already too late. Between his father and him, Ethan was the true bastard.

He did not deserve a son, but his son deserved a father.

Even now, the child was silently helping Ethan work, never did he argue, never did he lash out at him for his actions.

He just looked at him with love and admiration, and that hurt the most of all. Because everytime he looked deep into his eyes, he saw Amalia and his broken promise.

………

Ethan’s eyes wandered towards the small bag he had hidden under his desk. His son’s 16th birthday was coming up and he wanted to use that opportunity to break the icy barrier that had grown between them.

He had thought about what to buy Jule, yet everytime a new idea came to mind, he was tortured endlessly, being reminded of his own neglect. He had no idea what his son liked, and even less of a clue as to what to gift him.

In the end, he bought his son a small metal amulet. Bathed in a mixture of gold and various other metals, it hung from an alloy chain, unbreakable by all known methods. Inside the amulet, Ethan had hired a rank 4 mind enhancer to create an image of their family, and to inscribe both the image and amulet to last for centuries.

The image was something Ethan had stored in his mind, something from back when they often went out of picnics. In a meadow, Etha stood next to a smiling Amalia, a chubby baby between them, holding both their hands with his tiny fingers, a tuft of brown hair on his head

It was Ethan’s most prized memory, and what formed the core of his being.

“Father...I will go to sleep now” Jule muttured from his desk, organizing the papers and walking towards Ethan’s desk.

Jule looked at his father for a second, silence filling the hall once again, Jule’s feet signaling that he didn’t really want to leave.

Ethan cursed at himself time and time again, he wanted to stand up and hug his son, tell him all the stories he had accumulated over his long life, and hear all that his son had experienced.

But he just couldn’t move…

He felt like a machine that had not been oiled in years.

Ethan pumped himself up, using all his might to force his arms to move. He would give his child what he deserved, he could never even dare to beg for forgiveness, but he would spend the rest of his life to atone.

Yet, when he took a deep breath and stared deep into his son’s eyes, what he saw back was exactly what had haunted him for years. A frowning Amalia, a woman who gave all she had and was then betrayed.

As if Ethan was cursed, the words didn’t leave his mouth, they couldn’t…

Nothing he could ever say would fix the mess he had made, nothing would ever atone his sins and nothing would ever return him the warmth he had lost.

Maybe his child was better without a father like him in his life.

Jule bowed for a few seconds and then left, his steps slow and soft, filled with many meanings and reasons.

All Ethan could feel was that those footsteps sounded extremely lonely.

If Jule had taken a second to look back, he would have been welcomed by the sight of his father stretching his hands towards him, in the same way Amalia had often hugged him in his childhood.

Yet he would have also seen the symbol of strength, the idol he would always try to reach, and his own father, break down into tears.

Ethan Redshield was many things.

An unbreakable man, a godly warrior, The Shield of Dresden, a loving husband…

But a good father, he never was.