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17. Sewer Dash

The bolt of death connected with Drake's abdomen in slow motion. It tore into the flesh like a steak thrown into a blender. It ripped the muscle and sinew to shreds before continuing through and out the back side of his body. Blood sprayed everything nearby with a fine mist.

Devon faltered for a moment before refocusing on the door.

The mad scientist stumbled back. The attack had torn his guts to smithereens and taken a few ribs as a souvenir.

A clatter of heavy metal thunks filled the hallway as the scientist fell back to the ground with a look of utter surprise plastered to his face. Sean rushed over to Victor and began pulling him away from the injured man.

The villain was inspecting the wound with a clinical eye, poking and prodding the edges of it like it was the most interesting thing he had ever seen.

“Inhibits healing in some strange way? Fascinating.”

Devon pulled on the heavy door with all of the force he would muster. It groaned in distress, slowly opening the path to the free world. Sean refused to take his eyes off of the man in fear of the unknown. The scientist looked far too calm, and it was rattling his nerves.

He checked on the man he was dragging. Sweat poured down his brow despite the chilly air and his skin was pale as could be. To call him sickly would have been an understatement.

The air that blew in from the door was equally ranked as the hallway but far colder. A strange combination that Sean couldn’t help but take note of.

Devon grabbed the man’s other arm, and they dragged him away from the psycho clutching at his stomach. Sean watched the freak the entire time, staring into his eyes until they finally made it far enough away.

The trio carried on for what felt like an eternity in silence. Rays of light filtered in through storm drains above their heads.

“So, he got super kicked in the balls?” Devon decided to end the silence.

“Yeah.” His voice was low and melancholy. The man’s nude half dragged below them.

Neither were willing to take him on their backs in fear of something leaking onto them. Their conversation was interrupted before it could truly begin as a bright grey sphere stole their attention. A tall brown man in tight silver and black spandex floated within.

He glided above the slimy concrete with his chin tilted slightly back so that he could stare down at everything. His imperial glare finally landed on the trio as he scanned the concrete tube. Sean watched as he disappeared before his eyes. One second he was twenty feet away and the next he was right before them.

They jumped back in surprise.

“What're you all doin down here?” He had a thick upper Milenicadian accent, a clear native of the city.

“We are th-”

“We got kidnapped by a villain and barely made it out alive.” Sean went to speak only for the tattooed man to interrupt with a fictitious version of the story.

“Hmmm.” The man looked at them harder before dismissing them entirely with a careless gaze. “And where is this villain?”

“Straight back that way behind a huge metal door. You can’t miss it.” Devon had taken on a tone he had never heard before. It sounded childish and scared. A far cry from his real personality.

Without another word, the man floated past them and down the tunnel.

“What-” Sean grabbed at his arm where his coworker had hit him.

A single finger rose to his lips, telling him to be quiet as they went on their way searching for an exit of some kind. After what felt like an eternity, they stumbled upon a ladder and made their way up to the heavy lid. Sean lifted it up with ease and pulled himself free.

The air was brisk as he popped his head from the hole.

The other two followed after with Devon carrying their injured companion on his back despite the clear look of discomfort plastered on the tattooed man's face.

The street was unfamiliar to Sean despite his well traveled homeless life. The few people journeying the sidewalk took the first opportunity they had to move to the opposite side of the street from them in clear distrust. A sound option when someone sees a gaggle of men exit a sewer.

They led the delirious man into a nearby alley where Sean managed to scavenge a cardboard box to protect the man’s chastity.

“So, can we talk about who that was in the story you told him?”

Devon peaked around the alley corner, a fresh bout of paranoia taking him over.

“Talk low. Don’t want our voices to travel too far.”

They dragged their fellow escapee away from the street and leaned in to converse.

“That was a hero.” Devon spoke like it was the largest bombshell of the century.

“Okay, and?”

“And? What do you mean and? Haven’t you heard the rumors about that guy?” He was incredulous.

“No, I haven’t.” He paused for a response only to see the man staring at him like he was the dumbest person he had ever seen. “Should I?”

He threw his hands to the air and caught himself before the sound that wanted out could break through.

“That is Spasal. The hidden hero of the city. The big hitter that only comes out when it's really bad. Whenever he is roaming, villains are either surrendering or dying. There is no in between.”

Sean pieced together what his coworker was getting at.

“So he is a famous hero that was looking for the guy who ambushed the convoy?”

“Noooo, well, yes, but that isn’t all. When I say he is the hero, I mean it. No other heroes in the city even come close. People say his name in whispers cause he is so domineering in his elimination of villains. Henchmen receive zero mercy, none, zilch, nada.”

Sean nodded along.

“So we got lucky and made it out alive from the villain and now we don’t need to worry about him chasing us down.”

“Most likely. I bet every dollar I own that he is gonna be paraded into the Hero Union headquarters tomorrow in handcuffs, or rolled in on a stretcher under black plastic. They must feel really embarrassed for them to send him out.”

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He nodded along and went back and forth as Victor slowly came to.

The man was groggy and altogether uncertain about where he was or what was happening, but he was alive and that was paramount.

“My balls feel like they got crushed in a vice.”

They nodded along in understanding while he groaned in pain.

“And why is my dick boxed up?”

They cackled with laughter leaving the poor man even more confused. The pair helped him up and watched him take his first steps like a toddler before letting him stumble under his own power.

“I think I need the hospital. I feel like death.” They walked down from the alley and through the streets looking like the strangest trio many of the residents had ever seen.

Sean quickly understood why he didn’t recognize the place. The Hero union building stood proudly in the near distance. Its black glass windows, domineering stone facade, and massive sign that advertised its purpose made it clear to all around that they were not to be messed with.

It was an unwritten rule amongst the street dwellers that the blocks around the building were off limits. Nothing had ever happened to anyone that went near it, but there was no reason to tempt fate when some of the richer citizens had more sway with the organization than was healthy.

Sean thought back to the drain they had left and followed the street to near where the lair would have been and shook his head.

‘The crazy bastard made his home right underneath their noses. Cocky asshole.’

They went on their way, in the opposite direction of the ominous building in the distance.

“Do you have anyone we can call?” He said the words when his free hand rocketed down to his pocket.

“Shit.”

He had no idea where it was. Had the Union members taken it? Did the scientist? He remembered talking on the phone before meeting up with Devon , but everything after that was a blur.

“It’s in the car.” The tattooed man spoke up as he saw his coworker beginning to freak out.

“Your car!” Victor flinched back from the shout.

“Calm down. There is a reason we parked so far away. Don’t want anyone with a full brain connecting it to the bust. Let’s just hope no one broke into it.”

“So, no phone call?”

-

They finally made it to the hospital after a short detour for a pair of pants for the shivering man.

The people at the desk looked far more worried than Sean was expecting as they dragged him inside only for them to glare at him once he said what caused the injury. A random mugger came out of nowhere and kicked him in the balls. Far less incriminating and eye-catching than a villain exploding his testicals with a beautifully executed front kick.

They hastily abandoned their compatriot after a short conversation. It was better for everyone involved if they had no way of contacting each other as things hopefully returned to normal.

The pair flagged a cab down only for the driver to speed off as he saw what they were wearing. Blood-stained clothes, soaked through by meaty juices were far from the top of their list of preferred clientele.

The walk to the club was thankfully uneventful, but far longer than either of them were happy to do. Dozens of miles of city blocks later and the glowing neon sign of Les Gros broke through the solemn mood that had taken over the duo. Their pace quickened and they rushed to the doors.

The door flung open, welcoming them in like they had never left.

“Hey, get out of here you fucking bums!” Imani shouted at the two haggard men.

They froze in place, staring incredulously at the man like he was an inanimate object.

“Didn’t you hear me? I said get out.” He reached for the baton at his hip and flicked it open in one smooth motion.

A single growling stomach rocked the room. Devon wiped at his mouth. In their desperate need for safety, they had forgotten their basic needs. Their mouths were dry and lips were cracking.

“Fuck off, Imani. We are starving.”

The shorter man looked Devon up and down like he was an alien. The normally well manicured suit had been stained, wrinkled, and damaged. His clean shaven face with the first signs of a five o’clock shadow was a far cry away from how he remembered the dead man. A look of understanding finally overcame him.

“Holy shit, holy shit, how are you-, holy shit! Boss! They are alive! Boss!” He turned from the pair and rushed for the back room.

Devon turned to the double doors at their back and latched them shut before following in the excited man’s footsteps. The back room opened up as Louis pushed his way into the main floor. He was taking deep labored breaths like he had just ran a marathon.

“Boss, that might be the fastest I have ever seen you move.”

Devon said with a deadpan voice.

A smile slowly spread across the boss's face.

Sean produced a little wave as he rushed the bar for one of many minifridges that housed water for the employees. He cracked one open and downed the contents in seconds and tossed one to his compatriot.

“You bastards…I thought you died. Heh, you’re like fucking cockroaches!” He shouted as a fit of laughter overtook him.

“Can we get some food?” Sean walked over with a few more bottles in hand only to be pulled under Louis’ arm.

The Boss led the pair into the backroom where he kept his personal stash of roasted turkeys, stacked boxes of pizzas, and a variety of other foods Sean failed to recognize. Louis cracked open his humidor and lit up a cigar that looked more akin to a black and mild between his thick fingers.

“So, why don’t you guys tell me everything that happened? It’s not every day that a bust like that goes down and then the bust gets busted and somehow, the people I thought were dead turn up at my front door still kicking.”

They scarfed down food and recounted the story for the surprisingly jovial man.

He listened with interest as they recounted the moment several of the lackeys dropped dead. He smiled when Sean mentioned the truck he was thrown into.

“Those are gonna be the good old days. You’ll remember this for years to come.”

He leaned in as they spoke about the villain. They cringed as they recounted the testicular abuse of their fellow escapee. Their story finally came to an end as they recounted running into Spasal in hushed tones and fleeing up the manhole cover only blocks from the Hero Union.

“Well, sounds like you guys had a blast.”

Louis held off a laugh as he pulled out a few wads of cash. He tossed them over, landing in front of the pair with a thud. Devon’s brow raised as he looked at the thick bands. Sean hefted the money into his hand and looked at the spread of bills. It was far more than he had ever held.

“That’s two grand. Consider it a bonus for Hazard and emotional distress. Now, It sounds like we need to get your car back. I’m assuming your key is gone?”

The tattooed man nodded in sadness.

“All good. I’ll send someone over to clone the fob while we relax.”

Imani joined them halfway through as night began to fall. It was mostly just shooting the shit and enjoying everyone's company. An overall good time compared to the gauntlet they had just battled through.

“Alright. As much as I enjoy the talk. I want to pass out on a bed of cash. Fuck off to the lobby to wait for your car and phone. Glad you guys made it out alive.” Louis showed them the door and locked it behind them.

The trio talked some more and walked to the exit as they heard a car pull up. The black luxury vehicle they had taken to the warehouse was slightly different than he remembered. Scatches and dents littered the pannels that once glistened under the street lights.

“God damnit!” Devon shouted as he grabbed the fob from the man who delivered it and checked inside. Glass littered the passenger side seat, and the window was nowhere to be found. “Did you break the window to get in?!”

“What do you take me for? An amatuer? I just copied it from the outside and hopped in. I didn’t even notice it was broken until after I was done.”

Devon sighed as the unguided annoyance of the day sought a new target only for him to crumble into the leather seat.

“Sorry...thanks.”

The man nodded along and turned to Sean.

“And this is for you. Louis called me and told me to hand it off. Free of charge. Even has his number and a few others already stored.”

“Thanks?” He looked down at the shiny phone with a hint of confusion.

The man patted him on the back and disappeared down the street.

“Wait. that means-”

“Someone smashed my window and took all of my shit and yours at the same time. If that wasn't enough, they decided to take a hammer and fuck it up at the same time!" His fist curled as he slammed it into the steering wheel, honking the horn for a brief second. "Fuck!”

“Well, I guess it could be worse. They could have stolen the car too.”

Devon looked like he wanted to be mad but couldn’t muster the energy. Soon he was laughing right along with his coworker as the full brunt of the situation's absurdity lay onto them. Sean hopped into the passenger seat, brushing the glass onto the road.

“Where are you living right now?” He stopped to think for a second. The wild situation halting the memories of only a day prior.

“The motel on Mundy. I think at least.” His coworker gave him a side eye that reminded him of the chauffeur.

“What? I wasn’t rolling in cash until recently. That place is heaven compared to where I used to live.”

They spent the rest of the drive there getting to know each other a little better. They shared stories of their past and how they ended up in the situation that they found themselves in now.

Most of the talking was done by Devon as Sean quickly realized his life had been far more depressing than he previously thought.

They finally arrived at the motel and parted ways. It only took a few minutes of convincing and a twenty dollar bill to the front desk employee for a new key to his room.

He pushed through the door and looked around at the clothes scattered around. A remnant of the mental struggle he went through. They would have to remain that way till he wasn't so exhausted.

He stripped the filth from his body and tossed them into the trash. Sleep overtook him with ease as the full brunt of the day’s occurrences crushed him.