Have you ever had that feeling in your stomach? That one that feels like a rock has settled in and made itself at home in the very bottom of your abdomen? I'm sure that you do. We've all felt it at some point. When you have been called up in class for doing something wrong, when you've gone to that cute guy or girl and finally worked up the courage to ask them out, when you get a call from the hospital telling you that your parents didn't make it from that car crash.

Or, like me right now, getting called into your supervisor's office and getting told that you're getting let go.

"What do you mean, let go?" My voice was flat and hallow and devoid of any and all of the fear I was currently feeling.

Hank, my boss and sometimes gaming compatriot, looked flustered. Hank is a big, burly guy who makes vending machines seem small. Seeing him flustered would usually bring me a smile. But right now wasn't usually.

"I mean, let go. The big wigs at the main office told me to drop everyone from the list they been and you're on it. I'm sorry." As he spoke, Hank looked more and more ashamed. 

"Sorry? Sorry isn't going to pay for my family's food. It's not going to pay for our apartment. And it's sure as hell isn't going to pay for Sarah's treatments either!" By the end of my little rant, I was shouting. Normally, I'm a pretty quite and mellow person. But right now, I didn't really care.

Hank sighed and looked down at his paperwork strewn desk, shuffling some of it nervously before speaking. "I know B, but they aren't budging on it. Trust me, I tried."

It was easy to be angry at him. Angry at the one delivering the bad news instead of the source. But it didn't help. The rational part of my mind was already telling me that it wasn't helping and my gut was telling me that he wouldn't have brought me in and told me unless he really had tried everything. Hank's nickname around the office was the 'Mother Bear' and not just because of how he gets when he's angry. He was the kind of guy who would fight tooth and nail for all of the people under him and all of us loved him for it.

Feeling my anger evaporate almost as fast as it had come, I sighed and dropped my head into my hands. I could already feel a headache coming on.

Taking that as a sign to move on, Hank continued speaking, but I was already lost in thought, wondering what I was going to tell my family.

______________________________________

"So, what happened? Spill!"

"Did you get the promotion?"

The two voices rang out almost simultaneous, one voice a husky feminine and the other an almost boyish masculine. Looking up from my shoes, I saw a young white man, probably eighteen or nineteen years old. His blond surfer hair and pretty boy face belied his intelligence. The woman next to him was an older african american woman, who looked to only be a few years older than me, but I knew that she was in her forties. She had raven black hair that was fluffy and curly.

I just stared at them for a moment, wondering how to tell them the news. Jessica, the woman, must have noticed my hesitation, because a second later she elbowed Derrick. Both of them looked at me, trying to figure out why I hadn't said anything. I decided to try for funny.

"You know how I always complain about overtime and never getting to see my family? Well, that's not a problem anymore." As I said it, a kind of half smile formed on my face. The kind you get when you know that what you just said wasn't funny and all you wanted to do was cry or get drunk. Or both.

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Jessica understood instantly and came over to me, sadness in her eyes. It took Derrick a second longer. I knew when he got it, because his eyes opened wide and he stammered.

"Y-You got fired!? What the hell man?"

The same half smile flashed his way as Jess gave me a hug. While Jessica and I had been on the same team for over five years, Derrick had only gotten on about six months ago. The kid was good and he was nice, so all six of us had gotten along, but we both knew that we were only business friends. Still, the sentiment was nice.

"Don't worry, I'm the only one getting let go in this part of the section. The rest are from other groups."

A brief flash of relief appeared on his face, then a pang of guilt.

"Still man, that sucks."

Jess let go and looked up at me, eyes watery. She had always been the most sensitive one out of all of us and was almost like a mom to me. It was because of her that I even had this job in the first place and my leaving would hit her the hardest. Hell, knowing her I would bet she would blame herself somehow. I gave her a smile, this one a little more genuine, before I stepped past her and into our office to pick up my things.

Inside, the other three members of our six person group where waiting. They had obviously overheard us, as the usual good mood around our office was nowhere to be found at the moment. Greg, the only other smoker in the group, was looking away, playing with his brown hair and tapping his fingers on the table. He looked like he would give anything to be on a cigarette break and I didn't blame him. After three years with the guy, I knew that he hated touchy feely things and would always try to avoid anything more emotional than a discussion on the latest football game or book he was reading.

Kaylee and David where a different story. They where both looking at me, shock covering their faces. Kaylee's dark, caramel colored skin and stunning green eyes was in a stark contrast this David's pale white skin and brown ones. Though the never admitted it, they where the office couple and tried to never show signs of affection in front of the rest of us. Except right now, they where holding hands as they gazed at me with concern.

"So....." I said lamely, fake smile reasserting itself on my face "Guess who has the rest of the week off?"

______________________________________

Stepping out of the building that had provided for my family and me for the last five years, I sighed and hefted up my box. 

The rest of the goodbyes had been awkward. After finally promising to call them all from time to time and making plans to hang out together sometime, all that I had left to do was pack up my few belongings and leave. As I had been leaving, Greg stood up and handed me a cigarette, saying that I should smoke one for him. That was the closest I would probably ever come to a heart felt goodbye from the man. Still, as I pulled out my lighter and lit it, I felt touched.

The walk to the bus station was short and uneventful. As was the bus ride. It wasn't until I was a few blocks away from my apartment that it finally hit me. I was jobless. 

I stopped walking. I had about five grand saved up in my bank account, but that wouldn't last me more than two months with all the bills and my sisters treatments. Sitting down on a curb, I put down my box of things and pulled out another cigarette. In the distance, I could hear the noise of children playing and screaming at the park that was a couple of blocks from my apartment.

It was odd for me the hear them. I usually didn't get off until well past the sun setting and I get up before most kids come out to play. As I listened and smoked, I wondered once again how I was going to break it to my sister and brother. 

After our parents had died in a car crash, I'd had to drop out of college and take care of them. My brother had been ten at the time and our sister had been seven. The only reason I had been allowed to take them in was because of my job and persistence. Although I knew rationally that cps wouldn't be knocking on my door in an instant, I still couldn't shake the dreaded feeling that my grandparents would find out and make another move to get custody.

Lighting another cigarette, I picked up my box with one hand and began walking home. It was gonna be one hell of a time explaining everything to the two of them, but it had to be done. No point in delaying. Still, I suppose it could be worse. 

At least this time I wasn't coming home with our parents deaths on my hands.