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To Cross the Threshold
Chapter II.3 - The Inner State

Chapter II.3 - The Inner State

  “That’s the question you better direct to officers, friend.”

  Joe felt like the temperature around him dropped sharply. The doctor’s answer was curt and straightforward, leaving no room for objections. He was no longer smiling.

  Ailuros briefly touched Roth’s hand. Doctor sharply inhaled.

  “That’s a question only the Captain and the quartermaster could answer. I’m just a doctor, fixing their mess.” The smile returned, although it was a melancholic one, instead of a wide and bright one that Roth greeted Joe with.

  Makes sense, Joe nodded to himself.

  “Let’s wrap it up. It’s the middle of the night, I haven’t got a peck of sleep. Before you go to Xander, I need to write down your characteristics.”

  The doctor pulled out a small book and a wooden pencil.

  “Well?”

  “Well, what?”

  “Your numbers? Like Strength, Endurance, Intuition…”

  Joe was looking at a doctor with a blank face.

  What is this, a video game? Did I have to put points into my character at some point? What is going on here?

  Both naji and Roth were staring at him, waiting for something to happen.

  “I have no idea what are you talking about.”

  What’s with this pity in their eyes? It hurts!

  “Ho-o-o-o-oh…” Doctor’s eyes were brimming with sympathy and understanding, so much, that Joe felt like he said something so outrageously dumb, the most reasonable course of action would be to throw himself off the ship right this moment.

  Hell, he had no idea what else he could’ve said!

  “Are you sure that you’re feeling alright?… You know you did recover way too quickly…” The doctor grabbed Joe’s shoulders, trying to lay him down. “You should go back to bed… It was a mistake to let you get up so early…”

  “Wait-wait-wait-wait! Wait!” Joe put his hands up. “I’m being serious here! I know nothing about numbers! I never knew people could have numbers!”

  “He sounds sincere,” Thank you, God! For a talking cat was coming to his rescue. “His trauma hasn’t healed yet - or he lost his memories. Let’s keep him on a watch for a week.”

  “Oh, not you too!” The sudden betrayal! “I’m completely fine, trust me! I haven’t lost my memories or anything, I really have never heard anything like that before!”

  Both of them looked at each other, Ailuros nodded. Roth sighed and dropped his shoulders. Both have seemingly came to an agreement.

  Too bad Joe wasn’t included in that agreement.

  “Alright then…” Doctor hesitantly shook his head. “She is vouching for you. If you’re speaking the truth, then I want you to swear on it.”

  “I give you my word - I am not hiding anything and I am not trying to look dumb. As I told you before, I absolutely have no idea what are you talking about.”

  It looked like both of them accepted his word, although Roth still had a skeptical look on his face. But there was nothing else Joe could’ve done to make him believe. Expect maybe share a couple of cans of beer, that was usually a universal recipe for getting on someone’s good side.

  “Then… First, I want you to sit on a bed and put one leg beneath another. Also, make sure that heels are pointing at your own body.”

  “Like this?” Joe quickly assumed a lotus pose from his yoga days.

  “Are you sure you don’t remember anything?”

  “At this point, I don’t know what to do to convince you…” Joe grumbled in response.

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  The doctor stretched his limbs for a bit before sitting back down on a stool.

  “I believe you. It’s not me you should be concerned about… but where were we? Right, the Inner State. So, close your eyes, focus on your breath, and try not to linger on passing thoughts for too long. If everything is correct, you will see a result pretty soon.”

  “The Inner State?”

  “You’ll see, you’ll see. Just focus on breathing and look into yourself.”

*****

  From his adolescence to college years and into adulthood, Joseph was always trying new things. From the age of twelve, his grandfather was training him to become a hunter. He learned a lot about making traps, surviving in a winter forest, and how to handle a rifle. Sometimes he was helping his grandpa to skin and cut animals, although he rarely could finish a job - not because he was afraid of blood, but because his parents didn’t want him to spend his time around dead bodies.

  As he was growing up, his love for hunting slowly withered away - a school took care of it. Joe was still visiting a gun range from time to time well into his adulthood, but his enthusiasm waned as time went on and he was mostly doing it out of habit.

  He tried boxing, yoga, writing songs and stories, cycling, and dancing. Nothing could hold his attention for long, although he did pick useful tricks and habits that found use in his day-to-day life. Especially in college and beyond, which required his attention full-time, leaving no opportunities for anything else. His parents pointed him towards computer science and Joe, without really thinking, agreed.

  Nothing in his life could prepare him for his next revelation.

  What the hell is that? Is that me?!

  He was seeing things. Well, he was seeing his own body, but that’s beside the point.

  He saw a silhouette of his own body, sitting in a lotus pose, in the middle of the darkness. It was surrounded by a transparent white aura.

  Above the body, Joe saw very familiar-looking words.

  Status: Normal.

  Body: Normal.

  Mind: Normal.

  Spirit/Will: Normal.

  Now what?

  As if on cue, to the right of the words a new text popped up.

  User is connected. Opening Manual.

  Words disappeared. A wall of text appeared instead.

  Welcome, User! The following document is provided to you by The World Systemtm . Its purpose is to provide you with instructions and information on various functions and features of the Systemtm .

  Basic Information:

1. To see the information and description of any function, simply focus on it with the intent of learning more about it.

2. To see your Characteristics (aka Stats), simply focus on a specific category - Body/Mind/Spirit. To see your Skill List, focus on “Status” instead.

3. White color around a simulation of User’s body means that User does not suffer any debilitating effects, does not have any external or internal injuries, and is not affected by any condition, recognizable by Systemtm. If you are affected by an unknown condition that does not show on a simulation, you have to acquire relevant Knowledge and update your Inner State.

  For more in-depth information, continue reading the Manual.

  ...Sigh. Nobody ever reads this anyway, why do we even bother...

  There was way more text below the line, but Joe decided to follow the Manual author’s advice and focus on the Body first.

  Image of himself disappeared, the new text took its place instead.

  Body (Characteristics):

  Strength - 43/100

  Endurance - 44/100

  Perception - 40/100

  What do any of them mean? This looks very similar to RPG. I wonder if Systemtm has the same problem - one stat to rule them all, and the others are just dump stats? I sure hope not.

  Joe decided to take a closer look at Strength to learn more about it.

  Why, the Strength is for lifting and punching stuff, silly! You can also impress any girl by lifting a cart of flowers, or carrying her in one hand like a caveman you are! You can solve any conflict before it even starts! Invest in Strength starting from today, and may your arguments always be as heavy as the stone you crash against a poor schmuck’s head!

  Why does it sound like a sales pitch? And why is it so aggressive?! Nevermind, moving on…

  Gentleman, you’ve made a great choice to invest in Endurance! What could be more impressive, than making an entire firing squad die of exhaustion, while you take bullet after bullet like a champion you are? Even better, you don’t need to get into the conflict at all - you can run across the entire Earth and nobody will ever be able to catch you! Don’t forget about more personal moments - your partner will be with you for so much longer! You cannot always rely on Strength alone, mate - you always need some good ol’ Endurance to even wake up from the bed!

  Why is it so long? And why are you suddenly throwing shade on Strength?!

  Without me, you are blind. Without me, you won’t even see your own nose. Without me, your reflexes with be worse than a thousand-years old grandpa, who is suffering from rheumatism. I am Sight, I am Sound, I am Touch, I am Smell and Taste. Oh, and I’m also your Reaction and Agility. I have no idea why I’m forced to share a space with them, just don’t think about it...

  Pretentiousness aside, this one is actually nice. Let’s check the Mind then…

  Mind (Characteristics):

  Understanding - 49/100

  Memory - 37/100

  Logic - 45/100

  I wonder how high my Stats are for this place… I don’t think I want to read another long description again. It seems simple enough. Let’s just check all of them and get back to Roth.

  Spirit/Will (Characteristics):

  Resolve - 45/100

  Intuition- 39/100

  Empathy- 27/100

  Empathy is spiritual? I guess it makes some sense, but… why is it so low?! I thought I was a decent person, what happened?!

  Those stats were severely disappointing. Based on their distribution, they were either randomly assigned, or, perhaps, pulled directly from before he got access to that… State. Joe had no way of knowing.

  Maybe reading the Manual through was a good idea after all. He had no idea how to level up…

  Anyway, there was one thing left for him to check.

  He opened the “Status” section.

  It was split into two parts. The “Status” part was simply informing him that everything was normal, repeating the same words. Joseph wondered, why was there a need to repeat the exact same information twice.

  Such a waste of memory space.

  The “Skills” part was looking way more intriguing.

  There were only three lines.

  Firearms Handling - 30/100 (Apprentice)

  Marksmanship - 72/100 (Journeyman)

  Survival - 10/100 (Novice)

  Joe was pretty sure his mind was playing tricks on him. He hadn’t been at a gun range for a year, no way his skill could be that high. Well, a 30% percent chance to miss is not something one would call “high”, but it was way better than he thought his skill would be. Now, if only he could get his hands on a gun, like the one that big weirdo-cat was carrying…

  He mentally shook his head. Why would he start shooting in the middle of nowhere?

  He should return back to Roth anyway. At least twenty minutes had passed while he was stuck in his headspace. Or whatever the Systemtm was.

  Now, how would he go back? If entering the Inner State required him to clear his mind from outside thoughts, then, perhaps, he was in a state that was similar to lucid dreaming?… Joe wasn’t sure if it’d work, but he had no other idea.

  Should’ve read the damn Manual…

  He forced himself to wake up.